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New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, October 09, 1878, Image 6

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn89064939/1878-10-09/ed-1/seq-6/

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Spring Fever*
I know where summer woods are green,
Where summer shade is dark and deep, ju
Where frondage forms a cooling stream,
Where wide-leaved lilies lie asleep,
And where the early blossoms blow:
I know, I know, but cannot go.
1 know where laughing waters fall,
Where sapphire summer lakes are spread,
Where merry springs are musical,
And brooks with fountains at the head,
And where the lordly livers fkrv
I kno^v, I know, but cannot go.
1 know where birds delightto sing,
Where squirrels chatter at their play,
Where bees sweep by on busy wing,
Where fragrance fills the dying day,
And fireflies sparkle to and fro,
I know, I know, but cannot go.
know where ocean airs are free,
Where salt waves dash upon the beach,
Where bright sails glisten o'er the sea,
Where rock and sand strangelessons teach
Rock dark as death, sand white as snow,
I know, I know, but cannot go.
This wilderness of stone and brick
Enfolds me still from day to day:
My soul is sad my heart is"sick,
And yet I cannot slip away
pleasant places that I know,
snow,I know, but cannot go."'
URQUEHARllT'S KliVEJfttE.
On my way to the island on a purely pro
fessional visit I encountered Urquehardt. It
was on the pier at the foot of Twenty-sixth
street. There is a little waiting-room there
not bigger thana large packing-box, in which
the miserable wretches who are waiting for
the boat to take them to Blackwell's or Ran
dall's Island usually huddle to escape the river
winds in winter and the glare of the sun in
summer. At this time it was empty. I had
iust missed the boat, and would have to wait
nearly an hour.
While I was growling to myself about it
Urquehardt came in. I hardly knew him.
For seven years I had lost sight of him, and
not knowing if he were dead or auve, had
ceased to think of him. He had studied with
me for a year. We had been quite intimate at
school. He was a bright, nervous, ambitious
fellow, and had shown remarkable proficiency
in chemistry. I had heard afterward that he
had drifted into the drug business, and once
or twice vague intimations reached me that
he had contracted irregular habits. Then, as
I say, I lost sight of him and forgot him.
Now he stood before me, and when he
made himself known I was astonished at the
change seven years had wrought.
One feels instantly, in such cases, the rela
tive condition of a companion. I did not
need to ask him if he had suffered.
He betrayed it in his thin face, his restless
eye, and his crushed expression. But I was
unprepared to hear that it was a case of the
heart.
"You've got half an hour to wait," said he,
after we had exchanged civil platitudes "Sit
down on that box of soap, and I'll tell you
about it. It's only common justice to hear
me, because you have been more or less in
fluenced by the gross exagerations that have
reached you."
I insisted that I had not heard a sylable
concerning his career or misfortune. He
looked forgivingly incredulous, and said
"Oh, well, you're entitled as an old friend,
to know the exact truth, and it will interest
you, for it has never been told. In the first
place.the girl was not my ^mistress a purer,
more honorable
"My dear fellow, I did not know that there
was a girl in the case,"
"Oh, you must have heard of the Prescot
affair. Everybody knew about it."
I shook my head He went on.
"The way it came about that I got into the
Prescot establishment was this- I was look
ing for a suitahle opening for a drug-store,
and seeing that place on the corner of Third
avenue and Eighteenth street advertised, I
called there.
"A man of the name of Ellingher kept it.
He was a Prussian. I had a talk with him
and found that henvas only a clerk that the
store belonged to a widow who owned the
building and lived over it. Her name was
Prescot. She was an eccentric invalid, con
fined to her room with rheumatic gout, and
was anxious to dispose of the place to some
capable man who could pay half her price in
cash. Ellingher thought it was a capital
chance for me the business was a good one
and could be doubled in the hands of a smart
man. He was very anxious, I saw, to be re
tained by whoever bought the store.
"I had saved about five hundred dollars, and
I thought I saw a promising opening. I
hurried around to the private entranee on
Eighteenth street to see the Prescot. I rang
the bell two or three times and waited nearly
half an hour, when I heard a little feminine
a-hem' over my hewl and looked up.
"A young woman was leaning upon the sill
of the open window. She was very pretty,
and she smiled in a very fascinating manner
me. That was my first meeting with Addie
rescot. All the other accounts are pure ro
mance."
Urquehardt said this with such an impres
sive manner that I hesitated to tell him again
that I had not heard anv other accounts.
Now," he continued. I suppose 1 fell in
love with the girl then and there, but I did
not know it at the time. I stated my busi
ness and my desire to see Mrs. Prescot,
whereupon she came down and let me in
There was, immediately opposite the front
door, a little reception-room. It was an ex
temporized affair, and at some time must
have been a prescription-room attached to
the drug store, tor there, was at this time
only a board partition separating it from the
ihop, and this had been papered over and
otherwise disguised,
"The young lady conducted me into this lit
tle room, and, before permitting me to see her
mother, adroitly cross-questioned me about
my purpose. I was very frank with her, for
her naive manner, her beauty, and her
simple unaffected character woin me.house.'d I sai
to myself, 'It wilwl adtd much to my happiness
TO ii
a
won *a the
8
8ee
Well, sir, not to make my story too long,
I found the old lady every way agreable. I
told her exactly what my means were, and
what I hoped to accomplish. She appeared
to bfrfavorbly impressed, and was even more
comfiiunicative than I was myself. I had to
listen to her history aad a full recital of all
her fi-oubles. She was anxious to get rid of
the store, for ever fince her husband died it
had been mismanaged.
"The young woman sat demurely in the
room during the interview,listening, but say
ing nothing I was delighted with the result.
I eame away, feeling sure that I would get
the place ommy own terms, and that I should
have no trouble whatever with the Prescot.
The last thing she said to me was: 'Well
young man, come up and talk with me to
morrow, when you have slept upon it.' and
the last thing I saw as I lett the house was
the sweet smile of the girl as she looked after
me from the door.
"Do you know I was fool enough to say to
myself that night: 'Urquehardt, that beauty
has made an impression on you, and if the
signs are worth anything, you are not dis
agreeable to her.
4-4*.
4
"The negotiations reached this conclusion
the next day. I was to give the Prescott a
thousand dollars down, and the rest of the
money she would takeip yearly installments.
I immediately wrote to my mother in Delhi,
and she promised to raise me the five hundred
dollars by mortgaging a piece of land. But I
would have to wait several weeks for the
transaction to be completed. I told all this
to the Prescot, and she said there was no
hurry. Whenever I got the money we could
consumate the sale. In the meantime, If I
pleased, I could take my five hundred dollars
and make the reeded improvements that I
had suggested. I might consider that a loan
from her when ee made our bargain."
*And you did that?"
"Curses on my folly, I did. I was infatua^
ed, I went every day to the house. I played
draughts with the old woman. I listened to
all her ^roubles. I got to chattering with
Addie on the staiis. I became intimate with
Ellingher. He entered into all my plans. I
had designs made of new soda fountains.
Tore out the shelving, put new marbles on
the prescription-counter. In fact, I spent all
my time th**re for three weeks. And one day
Mrs. Prescot said to me: 'Why don't you
take that hall room on the first floor? You
can have it cheap, It's of no service to me,
and it will be very convenietfor you.'
"Then I went to live there.
"It was the turning point in my career.
From that moment I was doomed."
"You mean sentimentally doomed? We all
are at sometime."
"I mean," said Urqueharpt, "that I wa3
changed absolutely from a Christian gentle
man to a malignant fiend. You think you
are listening to the former friend of your
school days. It's a mistake. I'm not the
same person. When you have neard me
through you will execrate me. A month
passed by in that house. For sentimental
purposes, a month is a lifetime. Addie and
I were confidential lovers. I had found my
way to her heart. She sympathized with me,
and entered into all my plans as only one can
dowhohasa prospective interest in them.
When not in the shop, I spent most of my
time with her. I was as happy as a man
could well be, for I had an assured future,and
was loved.
'On the 26th of July a bolt fell out of the
clear sky and crushed me."
"Ah, it was business disappointment? A
clear sky is always full of them."
"No," said Urquehardt.
"Well, it was disappointment in love?"
"No," said Urquehardt. "I used the wrong
metaphor I was crushed by the uneventful
march of events. I was ruined because no
bolt would fall.
"On the 26th of July I was approaching the
house, singing inmy heart I hadjust bought
a little present for Addie it was a coral rose
exquisitely cut. I had it in my pocket, and
my fingers were around it. I look up. A
young man was ringing the door-hell. Some,
hing made me pause. Some instinct of my
soul recognized my enemy. He was a tall,
handsome fellow, with a pink face, blonde
whiskers, and exquisite's dress. I stepped
back and waited. Presently I heard a femi
nine 'a-hem.' He looked up. A smiling face
was at the window overhead. I heard him
say he called, about the drugstore, and desired
to see Mrs. Prescot. A moment latter the door
opened and he went in."
"A harmless bolt," I remarked. "You
turned it aside?"
"No," replied Urquehardt "it turned me
aside. I rushed to the Prescot to remind her
that her shop was not in the market. She
pooh-poohed me, and said I had no head for
business. I flew to Addie. She was talking
affably with the handsome druggist at the
front door. She avoided me all day. I sought
Ellingher He frankly acknowledged that
the new man had been looking at the stock.
I protested, squirmed, appealed. But the
handsome man came next day. He even
played a game of draughts, and I heard Addie
laughing at his flippant emarks. I stopped
him on the street and told him that I hadmade
arrangements to buy the store. He said
promptly 'So have I. I shall take possession
next week' His good looks, his placid man
ner, his imperturbable urbanity maddened me.
I felt at once that the man was a type of the
inexorable, and that I would be destroyed by
him without hope, as an iceberg is destroyed
by sunshine. Never in all my life had I ex
perienced snch a sense of uttei helplessness
as when in the presence of that mi}d, in
vincible monster, for he seemed to have the
machinery of fate behind him, and to be entire
ly irresponsible. 'The price of the concern
is $6,000. I have offered that amount in (ash,'
he said softly, but cenvincingly. 'You have
made some improvements in the store, I un
derstand I shall haye to reimburse you, I
suppose, when I get started. If you look in
to-morrow, I'll go over them with you.' With
that he touched his hat and smilingly went
ff.
"This incomprehensible superiority, which
I could not definethe alacritv with which
mynature felt the mastery of destiny in this
manwas what incensed me. I knew per
fectly well in my soul from that moment that
he would have his own way. I could not
comprehend it, nor could I reason about it.
I could only feel it. When I caught Addie
alone and upbraided her, I was not therefore
unprepared for her cool assurance that I bad
allowed my fancy to lead me astray, and that
her treatment of me did not warrant any such
ridiculous hopes as I entertained.
'In a word, sir, myjig was up. 1 was a help
less interloper all at once. Events pushed me
aside as if I had no will or voice whatever. I
was not only ignored I felt that I was a
nuisance. I withdrew and looked at the pro
gress of affairs with a
stunneld andeimbecile,
wonderment, I saw my1
riva com and go
and at each return become more securely my
maBter without any Special direction of hfa
efforts. I saw him take possession of the
store, saw his namein gold letteis on glass
'Donald P. May, Pharmaceutist:" I counted
the hourij that he spent with the false one up
stairs. I bored a small hole in the partition
and watched him intently when he was at
work. Addie ceased to speak to me, and
finally to notice me at all. But I had a lease
of the room for six months, and something
kept methere, brooding and watching. The
truth is I could not tear myself away
"As I told you, this room was at the end
of the store, and opened into the hallway just
opposite the private doorway. I therefore
could hear the lovers when they came down
stairs and stood talking in the vestibule. One
evening they came down late. I listened.
They though I was abed, and I overheard
their vows. Yes, I heard the double kiss that
be gave her. It smote me like a two-edged
sword, and awoke me to action. All at once
I made the discovery that what I needed was
a scheme of revenge. The moment this idea
came to me I felt the vacum in me_partly
filled. Every fuculty seemed to cry out that
no glory could equal that of mastering and
punishing the man whose superiority had
been guaranteed bynature.
I gave the whole of that night to the elab
oration of a plan. But it was not till a week
later that I hit upon a feasible one. lake all
great original schemes, its conception was
partly owing to accident. I was on the best
of terms with the clerk, Ellingher, and spent
a great deal of time in the drugstore with
him when his master was away. lam, as
you know, a skilled chemist, and Ellingher
was not It served my purpose to help him
in the laboratory.
"About eight feet of the rear end of the
shop was cut off by a high-railed counter and
desk, and behind this was the little work
shop where the prescriptions were com
pounded.
"I was in there alone one afternoon about
four o'olock fixing an infusion of rhatany to
strain, when I noticed that the pine wood of
tv"
fi *,&<
one of the shelves that ran across the parti
tion was smoking. I discovered that a large
condenser or lens which was fixed in a brass
frame had been left on the projection of the
window-sash, and it brought the focus of the
sun's rays upon the dry edge of thepine shelf,
In an instant my mind had formulated a
scheme.
"I looked at my watch. It was four o'clock
and nineteen minutes. I moved the lens, and
found that I could throw the focus into the
middle of the shelf. Ellingher would probab
ly never notice it. Then I examined the bot
tles on the shelves. There were two large
vessels containing 'absolute alcohol,' one that
was half full of oleum olivce, and another of
terebin thina. These jars were against the
partition of my room. The phosphorus was
kept in the cellar, under water, but there was
rosin, Burgundy pitch, and benzine under the
shelves on the floor.
"Now that a difinite plan of action was
formed I had became a new man. All my
old activity and skill revived. I had received
the money, tardily enough, from my mother,
and resolved to devote the whole of it to car
rying out my revenge. And to the accom
plishment of my purpose I bent all my intel
ligence and subordinated all my feelings
"It took me three months. Do you know
what 1 did? Let me tell you, as briefly as pos
sible. First of all I dissembled and won a
subordinate place in May's employ. He
thought hecould trust me, and that knowl
edge gave me joy, for I felt I was fooling
destiny. I learned his habits, studied his weak
nesses, and waited. On Thursdays Ellingher
had a half holiday, and I was left in possess
on of the store. By degrees I made just the
inflammable materials in the laboratory that
answered my purpose. The arrangement was
a most ingenious one, and I knew that if a
flame ignited one end of my train no human
power could prevent it 'from reaching the
other end. I calculated the sun's apparent
motion southward day by day. I experiment
ed with a duplicate lens of the same power in
my room. I had a diagram of the partition,
and could tell to the sixteenth of an inch
where the sunlight would fall at any hour in
the afternoon."
Here 1 interrupted Urquehardt. "It seems
to me, my friend," I said, "that you were tak
ing extraordinary pains to become an incen
diary, and might have eet Are to the store
more directly and surely."
"Yes," he replied, "but it was no part of
my objectthough itmight be of unavoidable
consequenceto burn his store."
"Ah, what then was your object?"
"You shall learn. Immediately over my
room was the chamber occupied by Miss
Addie. She was in the habit of sewing there
in the afternoons. I could hear the treadle
of her sewing machine for an hourat the time.
On the floot above that there was a storeroom,
seldom entered, and, as I found, well packed
with refuse. Among other thikgs it contained
an oil cask, which at some time had been
brought up from the cellar of the store to put
under a leak in the roof. Such was the
structure of the building that there was a
space of four inches between the plaster and
the bricks, reaching from that storeroom to
the ground floor on three sides of Addie's
room. I calculated that with a rubber tube
drawn up through the space to the barrel I
could pump fiom my room noiselessly at least
forty gallons of benzine in one night, and that
when I was ready I could upset the cask so
that the inflammable fluid would flow down
the aperture on three sides of her room, sat
urating the lath and timbers, and, caught at
my floor, would run across the boards to the
partition, and thus complete the circuit of
flic."
"You do not mean to say that it was your
purpose to"
"It was my purpose to roast that woman
alive, to surround her with a quick and inex
tinguishable flame, and to haye her lover
where I could point it out to him, and tell
him it was my work. I was willing to die
for the satisfaction of bringing discomfiture
to him of enjoying for one instant my
power over him.
''Well," I said, "go on with your narrative."
"E\erything happened fortuitously. The
house, occupied only by an invalid, a girl,
and one maid-servant, who slept in the base
ment, presented few obstacles to the accomp
lishment of my purpose. When Addie was
out I could roam all over it without disturb
ing Mrs. Prescot. I succeeded in pumping
fifty gallons of benzine into the upper room,
and to prevent its evaporation and the con
sequent odor, fitted a paper head to the cask,
which I covered with an impervious coat of
ue. I fixed upon a day and made my ar
rangements.
"1 told May that I had come suddenly into
a large fortune, and he had the effrontery to
ask me to loan him quite a large sum of
money. I told him that I would let him have
it next Friday. That was the day I had fixed
for my bonfire, for Ellingher would be away
on Thursday, and Addia took her French les
sons on that day. I would, therefore have the
dace to mysell to complete everything. The
sun, as near as I could calculate, would serve
my purpose at 3 o'clock and nine minutes. It
would fire the phosphorus on the third shelf,
and that would in four seconds ignate the tur
pentine and explode the oil jar, which, in
turn, would set fire tothe floor saturated with
benzine and shoot a column of flame up three
sides of the girl's room. I need not bother
you with all the minute details of my scheme.
In order to show you its ingenious perfect
tion I should have to make a number of draw
iags and mathematical diagrams
'Suffice to say that I told May he could have
the money if he would come with me to Brook
lyn on Friday and get it, and at 2 o'clock on
that fated day, nervous and pale, I set out
with him from the store, every thing being in
train for an explosion at S o' clock and nine
minutes. He noticed my strange manner. I
told him with a forced laugh that I would ex
plain it to him when we crossed the river. I
tried to be cheerful but even while I joked
my mind was running over the points my
chain of possibilities. I could not think of a
weak or broken link. When we reached the
heights and got an unobstructed view of the
citly, looked atmywatch. It was two minutes
pasts 3, and my heart was beating violently.
"Sit down here a moment," I said to my
companion. In six minutes something will
take place that will interest you."
"He looked at me suspiciously, but sat
down. The city of New York lay before us,
its domes and steeples serving to guide the
eye in search of a particular locality.
"Can you point out whereabouts in that in
extricable snarl your own establishment is?"
I asked.
"Certainly," he replied. "There are theun
mistable suires of St. George's, and they are
only two blocks southeasat of the store
"It was ten minutes past 3. Could it be
possible my plan had miscarried?"
"Why do you ask me that question at this
time Y" said May, who was watching me.
"Hark!" I exclaimed. "Do you hear the
fire bells!" [At that time they rang the dis
trict]
"Can you count the districts?"
He listened. "Yes, distinctly!"
"What infernal nonsense have you
"Sit still! One, three, four! Ha, ha! One
hundred and thirty-four. That's yours.
Eureka!"
"What's the matter with you?"
"Matter?" I cried, with exultation. "Mat
ter? Look there on the other side of St.
George's spire. Do you see that puff of
smoke? It's your store. It means flame.
More than that, it means death. Your love
is in it. She is walled upin it. Even now she
is writhing in theagonies of death. Look
how it puffs up blacker and blacker. Why
don't you defy me? Why don't you scorn me
for my weakness? You don't say a word.
Where is your superiority? Am I the master
fobmentf^
"He uttered not a word, but stared at me as
if he though I had gono mad.
"At that moment a coupe came along and
he hailed it He offered thediiver ten dollars
to get bin. to Eighteenth street and Third
ayenue, and jumped in. Then he held the
door open for me to follow him. A moment
later we wererattling away toward New York.r
I taunted him all the way. but he never saideh
a word.
blackened
nw.'
"The ma-n drov" up Second avenve tU
A Western Diana.
Five miles from Eureka, Kansas, lives
a prosperous farmer named Robert Loy,
who is engaged raising sheep. His "boys
are all girls," and one of his daughters,
Mary Belle Loy, barely fourteen years of
age, is the shepherdess, whose rosy
cheeks, sun-burnt face and graceful form
as she mounts her pony would excite the
envy of many city belles, and charm the
eye pf a connoisseur in search of a sensi
tivejrose to complete the latest work of
his easel.
One day in July? while looking after
her wooly wards, she discovered a full
grown wolf of the coyote species, and an
uncommonly large one, stealthily ap
proaching the flock, when she uut her
horse to speed, and the wolf feeling that
his sanitary condition in that locality was
very unsatisfactory, the race and chase
commenced,over hills and prairie, neither
showing any indication of fatigue, until
finally he was compelled to consider him
selt "run down."
Now came the "cug of -war," aad any
one who has ever seen a coyote at bay
snapping and snirhng, holding his posi
tion against a dozin~dogs, can realize
her situation as a aggressor. Nothing
daunted however, she unbuckled her
bridle-rein, and with the ring at the end,
and this only, made good her position as
mistress of the situation, and, without
alighting from her saddle, she had soon
disabled her foe, saved her lambd,and de
prived him of at least one toothsome
morsel.
Thon she started out for the nearest
neighbor to the battle-ground, nearly two
miles distant, for assistance, but found no
one at home who could assist her save
another girl, who mounted another pony,
and armed only with a dull knife, these
two joung girls were soon galloping over
the prairie to save the scalp, for which
the county pays a "royalty" when pre
sented to the proper officer.
When they returned, the principal of
this Red Riding Hood escapade had par
tially recovered from the effects of the
"late unpleasantness," and was moving off
At this juncture he was again invited to
remain, while one girl threw him down
and^ the other proceeded to ad
minister Western justice by searching for
his jugular vein with the knife. Such
instances of feminine bravery as this are
rarely met with even on the "frontier.
Wanted a Patent for a Chalk-Mark.
ff
mone
tIle
thnno-htt. haA o-r.ne maA Vers,, aild f.hfiTy hiMre filorl on onnoa 4Wv
.__ .~v.e Translated from Heine.
AnrlJr^ff V$
tear
lfteenth sti eet, and thiough that side street Was the din of revel, and torches' flare
to Thud avenue. The moment weturned the
last corner we both thrust our heads out of There high within his royal hall
the windows. n-i-i.v
"I was just about to tell the driver not to
mind the crowd, but inform the police officers
we -were occupants of the burning building
^ey can pay law
hav
A
Faribault (Miss Telegraph.
TheWashington~coTrespondent of the ^Sf S SfJ?^?^"
an application reached the patent offce
from T. Strong and Kate 'M. Strong SSJnSS ^JS"?
ofTallade o.Ala..foranatentfor a a
of Talladego Ala., for a patent for
n?y
an
ant
guard. The petition, which was a ver
tunny one, set forth, that the Strongs, who
are man and wife, had jointly put their
heads together and had invented the
most wonderful thing ever heard of, to
wit, an 'act guard,' which they went on
to describe at^great length. They claim
ed,that it was patentable,,as it was new
and.useful, itwxxthings thatiafe riecessary
to secure a patent. The guard consisted
of drawing a chalk-mark around a table
or otbe place, by which" it waV claimed
the approach of ants was stopped. Mr.
Strongs^eafs it is"true, that an ant can:
not WaH&oveF a chalk-line,' and all that
is necessary to keep ants away from any
thing is to draw a chalk-line around it.
It appears that chalk makes an ant's legs
slip up, soaping a track prevents a
engine from starting. The petition was
novel, and caused considerable fun. At
last the commissioner of patents looked
over the precedents and directed his law
clerk to write a decision refusing the ap
plication on-the ground that there was
nothing new^ia the .invention claimed,
that chalk had been used for such pur
poses heretofore, and winding' upi vrjth
the general statement that such ideas are
not patentable. This decision was sent
to the Strong family, but it fajded to sat
isfy them- ^-They:
hatf made up their
minds that there was millions in their
invention, and they did not intend to be
1
7 such decision.
yers havn filed an appeall
the decision of the commsssioner of pa
tents. This appeal will be tried in the
circuit court.
Bolshazzar. **"on*'* The midnight honr was drawing
remains,' I said, 'for we are even Hushed into rest lay Babylon
,-p "v-w^u. avcuvo Io All save the royal palace, where
noble him splendo.r
uu
*"$,.*^H
IM UU IIIB iviyni
Hi
nai-l-
1rfl1
Belshazzas
shine,s,euiue
the Kin held festival
dnw -f-..w i
Hisf noble around him splendor
An drain down goblets of sparkling wine.
and to drive right through, when I caught
sight of the store."
"Well!" "Well, theie it stood. Ellingher was in the
doorway. A party of boys were playing
marbles on the sidewalk. Addie Prescot her
sell: tfas leaning on the sill of the side win- ^mrt^p^itifrnu
"I don't remember anything else. Now
you know the facts about that case there's
our boat."
Jut then Commissioner Brennan came into
the office and Urquehardt went out. I pointed
after the man, and wanted to know what was
the matter with him.
"Too much Bohemian, I think," said the
Commissioner. "He's been writing novels for
a weekly paper, and has got softening of the
brain. We're going to take him up to Dr.
Macdonald to see if we can't straighten him
out."
"Was he ever employed in a drugstore on
the Third
"Has he been telling vou that
incendiarJy
yarn?"
"Yes."
"Well, if you want to go to the island,
you'd better waltz aboard. There you are
now!"
When I*'got on fee boat Urquehardt saw
me. He came up with an attendant and
whispered in my ear.
I forgot to tell you that a cloud ohsaured
the sun from nine to ten minutes past three,
and at ten minutes past, when it shone again,
the focus fell outside of my phosphorus. The
fire that took place was caused by the upset
ting of a plumber's fire pot in the next
street.
The nobles shout and the goblets ring
'Twas sweet to hear of that stiff necked King,
The cheeks of the King, they flushed with fire
And still as he drank his conceit grew higher
An maddened^ with pride,o his lips let faln
Wild words, that blaspheme the grest Lord of
All.
More vaunting he grew, and his blasphemous
sneers
Were hailed by his lordly rout with cheers.
Proudly the King has a mandate passed
Away hie the slaves,and come back full fast.
Many gold vessels they bring with them,
The spoils of God's House in Jerusalem.
With impious hand the King caught up,
Filled to the brim, a sacred cup
And down to the bottom he drained it dry,
And aloud with his mouth afoam did cry,
"Jehovah! I scoff at Thy greatness gone!
I am the King of Babylon."
The terrible weds were ringing still,
When the King at his heart felt a secret chiil.
The laughter ceased, the lords held their
breath,
And all through the hall it was still as death.
And see, see there! on the white wall, see,
Comes forth whatseems a man's hand to be!
And it wrote and wrote in letters of flame,
On the white wallthen vanished the way it
came.
The King sat staring, he could not speak,
His knees knocked together, death pale was
his cheek.
With cold fear creeping his lords sat round,
They sat dumb-stricken, with never a sound,
The Magians came, but no one of them all
Could interpret the writing upon the wall.
That self-same nighthis soul God slain!
Was Belshazzar the King by his nobles slain.
A Young Husband's Troubles With
Limburger.
A young gentleman of Fairbaulta
boy among the boyswho occasionally
visited saloons and sampled lamb's
tongue, pig's feet, tripe, and actually edu
cated himself to like limburger cheese,
after a while married, as such men will.
His wife is a cultivated and sensitive lit
tle creautre, as lovable as she is sensitive.
Well, Robertthat was his name, Bob
for shortshook the boys after mirri
age, for two or three weeks, every even
ing but there were times when he had
an awful hankering for his old relishes,
such as hereinbefore, especially the
cheese, and one evening being down on
an errand, he thought he would take a
Limburger home and have an old-fash
ioned lunch before retiring. He got the
cheese and started for home, but as he
neared the house it struck hisi that it
was the rankest cheeee,even for Limburg
er, in all his experience. People held
their noses as they met him, and every
dog in the front yaid went around behind
the house as he went by. Before be
reached home his courage give out, and
he slipped his bundle into a hole in the
gate-post, thinking he would go in and
interview his wifesort of prepare her
lor the meeting, as it were.
But he was scarcely in the house before
his wile gave a warning sniff, and look
ing at him sharp inquired if he was sure
he hadn't stepped in something. Bob
mistrusted what was the matter, but in
nocently looked at one foot and then at
the other, and said "No, my feet are all
right." Mrs. Bob gave a sniff or twa
more, got up, opened the doo-, closed it
suddenly and then went into the rooms,
leading toward the rear of the house.
She was gone abont five minutes, and in
the meantime Bob became satisfied what
the trouble was, bnt for the life of him
did not dare to tell her. What would she
say to learn that he had eaten such stuff?
She would never forgive him, and would
probably apply for a divorce. She speed
ily returned, and said, in a business sort
of away, "Robert, we must have the sewer
I
C 2
tend to it in the morning, and at the first
?&"**? sh?:nto ped_outgarden, got a spade,
took the cheese the and bur
ied it. But he had to have the sewar, etc.,
cleaned all the same, and the job cost
him five dollars. A few months latter
Bob told his wife about it, but declared
the cheese was given him to try he had
never eaten any of it himself"
A child being shown the picture of
Daniel in the lion's den, began to cry.
"Don't cry, pet," said the mother. God
won't let them harm a hair of his head."
"Oh, I ain't crying for that but just see
that little lionDaniel is so small it
won't get a taste."
^Wives of great men all remind us
We can make our wives sublime,
$
And depa.-ting, leave behind us
Widows worthy of our time.
Therefore, give your wife a send-off 7 i
By the hfe insurance plan
Fix her sothat when you end off -*'U'u*'
She can scoop another man.
It is an easy matter to knock a crotch
et out of a crazy man's head, if you nly
hit him right. An old g^K^man, whose
brain was a little turiw^iitalled out to
his son one eight, "iMl Abel! Satan
nas been testing me all night to go
and drown myself in the horse-trough."
"Well, he must be a foell", said AbeL
"For there hasn't been a drop of water in
it for six weeks!" The old-geiitleman
turned over and went to sleep, thinking
no more ot evil spirits.
ft-fr ^m ^aSay^"^, J" 'k
*&&_&

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