What an Old Man Missed.
A man obout 60 years old, having
hlspamaloons tucked into his boot
less and his hat balanced ' on one
ear, got out of a farmer's wngon on
Michigan avenue, and inquired of a
bov leaning against a hitching-post
what kind of a time he had on the
fourth.
'The awfulest, goodest time you
ever icard ot."
-No?"
-You bet I did!"
" '-Why, I thought there wasn't
anything going on,"
-Nothing going on-eh? What
do you call over 100 cases ot drunks?
What do you call sixteen fights in
front of the City Hall? What do
you think ot five runaways all at
OHfe:
'By George ! And I wasn't here !
'And the police went around
knocking folks down, and five sa
loon keepers got cleaned out, and
three lame women got run over, and
over 12 boys got their eyes put
out.
"Sakes alive !
And 1 never saw
it!"
r."And a man he shot off hun
dred bunches ot fire-crackers to once,
and two hovs fell off the wharf and
three buildings took fire and a man
tried to cut his throat, and there
vveie six pick-pockets walking up
and down all the time.all the time!"
"And I wasn't within seven miles
of Detroit all day! What a fool I
was!"
"That's so; -.and a baby he
swallowed a' sky-rocket and it blew
him up, and a man got his eye put
out with a roman candle, and a tor
pedo made an ice-wagon run away,
and there ' was the awfulest time
around here vou ever heard of. You
orter been here. They give avva
beer and lemonade and cocoanut
and candy and bananas, and every
body hollered and yelled and hung
out flags and screamed for glory."
The old man heaved ar awful
sigh, looked around in a helpless
manner, and then extending his
rurin ;; until hi finger touched the
boys nose, and siid:
"There was whiskey, and I wasn'
here to drink! There was fighting,
arid iHVasn't here" to" fight! There
was glory; and I 'wasn't here to
-whoop ! Look at me, bub ! - I'm
the goshrall-firedest fool in the great
United States, .'and if vou was or.lv
big enough fa' mop me up and' down
the street for an hour and a half . I'd
give,, you the best yoke of .cattle, in
Wayne county." fDetroit , Free
Press - . . r i:
Drawing from the Nude.
:'"A voung lady was withdrawn from
the Cincinnati school of design by
request of her female associatcsx be
cause" she attended the night" fife
class with gentleman and sketched
a nude male figure. She explained
the situation to a Penny paper repor
ter and added : "The perfect hu
man ionn, male and female, are
. j .a a a,-.. a a a a- a. a, aa. .
It is necessary to be conversant
withitin order to nidge of all beauty.
For this reason I contend. I was
right when I drew from the nude.
Had all women this knowledge of
the human form we would not have
the M,andious low-neck dresses and
'tight " corsages of to-day crushing
the breasts and waists ail out of
.shape bringing the former into
suggestive prominence, and causing
the loveis to unnaturally decrease
the .iz- .f lln l.itler- Tf woman
had a ku' wledge of the symmetry of
the :nuk ioot they would nt cramp
Hala 111 ! la V 1 1 II I 'till a , Uliill-llCCltM,
Stl.
i'p to : coverings which disort
tht extrc
rai c.uri.
in s and give an unnatu-
I the body. r
Hit. Saratt's Daughter.
Ci..cir.n;;ti 1 "oTiisnereial.
Anim '-ir i:', rhc poor girl who
sur.Vrcd ternbly as to make her
old wh'lt m young in years,
livt - nt:: 'i. - I'Toshcr John. She is
the wife -i l'ni. Tonrov, who is
now ihc -".u'.i.ig che nist of Balti
more. , u r hc-r mother had been
harged. -and her own mental facul
ties had been shattered by the agonies
she hail undergone, the innocent
girl was; oa;r;ds&'d and persecuted
to an extent that is a disgrace to our
so calKt! Christian civilization.
Years af vr, v lu n Mr. Toney then
a government clerk dared. ? to
j. , was aismissecl Irotn
office fil'r'il ffi-n-
For a time- they were verv poor.but
being turned out of the government
grind pioxed to be the making of him
Icr . 1 ry. are now prosperous
, enough, iii a worldly point, ot view,'
, tut the once blithe and beautiful
- Aupie. is -a wreck, bodi mentally and
PhylcaI1Y with latf;ts white as the
,urjvcu smw, though tit little more
tbunQ years of age. She never
.lecoverttl from the shock of' that
awful day,, the last of Tier mother's
SPA subject to fits ot extreme
vneponuess, bordering upon de
lirium. The lord-lieutenant of Ireland has
promised to personally review the
investigation of rife trouble with the
constabulary.
A Brother's Madness.
A terrible tragedy occurred near
White Church, in Wyandotte coun
ty, on Saturday last, at which time a
voung farmers son, named Frank
Evans, shot and killed James Mills
because the last named wanted to
marry his (Evans') sister. Mills, it
seems, went to work for Mr. Evans
early last spring as a farm laborer,
and during his residence in the
house became enamored of Miss
Evans, the farmer's pretty daughter.
The love was returned and every
thing went swimmingly until F rank
Evans, the girl's brother, stepped
in to put a stop to the matter,
declaring that Mill should never
marry his sister, and furthermore
that he must quit the country or stand
the consequences. Mills replied
that as he loved the girl and the girl
loved him he would stay and marry
her. This talk took place one day
last week, and on Saturday after
noon, while all the interested patties
Were in the house, young Evans
broached the subject again and asked
Mills what he was going to do.
"I am going to stay," was the re
ply, when suddenly Evans picked
up a revolver Irom a; table saving,
; "Here is the way I serve such fel
lows as you," fired. Mills fell to
the floor, the bullet having entered
his bowels, producing a mortal
wound. Immediately after the
shooting Evans left the neighbor
hood and has not been seen since,
and on Sunday afternoon ; Mills, af
ter suffering untold agony, breathed
his last Friends of Evans claim
that the shooting was accidental,
and that at the time the revolver was
thought to be unloaded ; but th"e-facts
in the case go to .-show that the
shooting was certainly preirneditatehrf,
and that Evans had the revolver
handyLlo shool with ins case. Mills re
fused to - leave. Mr. Evans, the
man at whose house the shooting oc
curred, is well known about Wyan
dotte county, as are all the interest
ed parties. Miss Evans is a lively,
buxom lass of 18 summers, and her
brother a .year older. The author
ities are looking for the young shoot
er, but up to a late hour last night
nothing had been heard of him.
South Mt. Pleasant Items
Threshing is now in full blast in
this neighborhood. A. .S. Badgley
has threshed his large wheat, .crop,
which yielded 'well. Ben Ogle has
threshed 1,000 bushels of wheat
from between 35 and 40 acres.
As this is the season of the year
for chills ane fever, we are having
both, but more ot the latter than of
the former.
Chas. Tripp and daughter Allie
have been sick but are about well
again. Ben Ogle has been quite
sick for 3 or 4 weeks with intermit
tent fever but is now convalescent.
We are sorry to announce the illness
of A. S. Crabtree who is lying quite
low with something like dropsy and
heart disease.
We were serenaded last night by
a crowd from the Hill, first favoring
us with "Little empty cradle." Then
as the carriage moved off the beau
tiful voices rangout in the night air:
As the wagon goes 'round the bend,
Good bye! my lover, good by,
Loaded down with Rich Hill men,
Goodbye! my lover,, good bye.
E. J. Knapp having sold stock and
crop, is now making preparations to
move to Minnesota where he intends
to make his home in the future. Ed
die Badgley w ill, in all probability,
accompanying Knapp and family.
We stood outside the door when we
heard low niutterings at the gate, he
remarked as follows: "Dear Alice,
there lingers something within my
bosom which my tongue fails to ex
press!" "Why, what is it Joe? Can't
3'ou tell me?" No, no, he responded
(with a heavy sigh) I can't ; but you
may find it by reading the nth verse
ot the 4th chapter of first epistle oi
John. ' Toxxy Brick.
" There i a big excitement at El
Paso on account of gold discoveries
in the Oregon mountain district.
It seems to have been a 'unpre
cedented bad luck ot deaths" that
caused the trouble in the order of K.
G. R. :
- The inquests. on the victims ot the
Mount Pulaski murders closed with
1 out throwing any light on the crime
A Vexed Clergyman.
Even the" jpatience ot Job wouW become
exhausted "were he a preacher and en
deavoring to interest his auaience while
they were keeping up an incessant cough
ing, making it impossible for him to be
heard. Yet, how very easy can all this
be avoiJed by simply using Dr. King's
New D scoverv for consumption, coughs
and colds. Trial b -ttles given awav at
F RI. Crumley & Co's. drug store. No. i
The military convention has been
signed. '
Anleuee's IVoflee.
In the matter of the assignment of S.A.
Barada, John B. Ellis, assignee, notice is
hereby given to the creditors ot said
estate and to all whom it may concern
that I will, at the November term of the
Bates countv circuit court, A. D. 1SS2,
apply to said court for a . discharge trom
mv trust herein. John B. Ellis,
Assignee.
The Louisville exposition opened
Wednesday evening,
Wanted!
To get a situation in private families tor
two voung ladies, agetl respectively 15 and
17 years, to do general house work for
their board and attend school this winter.
Apply to Mrs. E. '. Speece,' Appleton
City, Mo. 35-
Texas fever is reported among
the cattle in Maine.
It you have any wheat, oats, or flax
seed to sell, vou will make money by
seeing Lefker at the Empire Mills, or
Lefker & Brown at the Depot betore sel
ling, they are buying for shipment and
pay the highest market price. 33"tf
Small-pox is causing great havoc
among the Osages.
Woman's True Friend.
A friend in need i a trie d indeed
This none can deny, especially when as
sistance i rendered when one is sorely
afflicted witn disease, more particularly
those complaints and weaknesses so com
mon with our female population. Every
woman should snyw at Electric, Bitters
are woman's true frienfl, and will posi
tively restore her to health, even when all
other remedies, fail. A single trial aU ays
proves or assertion. They are pleasant
to the taste, and only cost, 50 cents a bot
tli. Sold by T. M. Crumly & Co. No. 2
Jos. G. Lodge ha& been appointed
acting circuit attorney.
' Can't Get It.
Diabetes Bright's disease, : kidney,
urinary or liver complaints cannot be
contracted by you or your family if ' Hop
Bitters are used, and if you already have
any of these diseases Hop Bitters Is the
only medicine that will positively cure
you. Don't forget this, and don't get
some puffe ' up stuff that will only harm
The settling price for Tuly wheat
in Chicago is fixed at $135.
Answer This.
Car you find a case of Bright's Disease
of the kidneys, diabetes, urinary or liver
complaints that is curable, that Hop Bit
ters has not or cannot cure? Ask your
neighbor;; it they can.
The marquis of Lorne is billed to
reach Chicage Wednesday morning.
"Presumption begins in ignorance
and ends in ruin." On the other hand,
the production of Kidney-Wort began
with wise cautions and scientific research,
and its use ends in restoring shattered
constitutions and endowing men and
women with health and happiness. "My
tormented back," is the exclamation of
more than one poor hardworking man
and woman; do vou know why it aches?
Tt is because your kidneys are over tasked
and need strengthening, and your system
needs to be cleansed of bad humors.
You need Kidney-Wort. .
The Myers & Short menagerie
was sold at Louisville yesterday.
y"No family dves were ever so popu
lar as the Diamond Dyes They never
fil. The black is far superior to log
wood. The other colors are brilliant
The wool-growers of West Texas
held a convention at Abilene Wed
nesday. Vhy is Mrs. Lvdia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound like the Mississipp1
river in a spring freshet? Because the
immense volume of this healing river
moves with' such momentum thai i
sweeps away all obstacles and is literally
flooding the country.
At : Wheeling a skiff, swamped
with ten men, two of --whom were
drowned. ' v. t
Advocates of prohibition need have no'
tears ot Prickly As!; Hitlers.,' as it is a
hTnedicir.e, and bv reason of its cathartic
properties cannot be tted as a beverage.
It is manufactured trom the pure-t rrta-
! tena's, and acts directlr on the - liver, J
kidneys, stomach and hmvels. As a blood
purifier it has no equal. Is pleasant to
the taste and " effective in its "Action.
Sept. 1, tm. : V" "'.
Lyons & Nolf
(North Main St.)
Two Doors South of The
POSTO FF1CE
-Dealer in
GROCERIES
AMD
QUEEN SWABE
BUTLER, MO.
no tt
LIVERY STABLE
i F
Thos. Berryhill
Having purchased tiie stable ot j. -'X '.
Tracy, we are now ready to furnish
the public with
NEW BUGGIES and TEAMS.
WE ALSO KEEP A
Feed and Sale Stable
and will oe glad at all times to aceom
modate thepublic. : 174 tf-
P. --'ESORBMT
,.. ilas opened a
SeconiJ-riaftd Stoi'e
m
AWARD'S BUILDING.
on
NORTH-MAIN' ST.
t t ' ' t i i 1 b
? 1
j '. . r
, BRIDGEFOK-P & J DfjR. i
- !" '--AND
Sign Painters
Graining, Pa.pci-11 aiipiip:, Dcii:
ting, Sign and Bugtrv Work a
SPECrALTY
Bnehner & Joseqh,
JIanufactureif and
Fine Cigars.
Larsro stock ahvavs on Land and or j
I
27 .-m ders promptly filled.'.
JOHN DUFF
I'ltACl iAI-
Wacthmaker 8l Enrjra.'
THOMAS' CLOCKS
;ORUC. BJORBl
W. J. LAXSDOWN, Prop'r.
Good Stock of Pure, Fresh
; ? ; Drugs.
fox -rtlE WEST SliE OF THT? SXjtTARE
IX BUTLER. MO,
i I will "Jsve mv rjcrsofiai aitention
to .comtoiiniij!2r 'prescriptions, ilav
: .. nr ..
i
Give me a trial trip.
V. I. LANSDOWN.
Also proprietor ot the
OL1VEI10U SE,
A first-class Hete! in the Southwest
corner pf the public square,
li UTL10K, MO
DRUG HOUSE
-or-
DR. E. PYLE.
I. "all tor anything in the line ot
14"! i ritss,
Oils,
xmcl till
1 I TEXT MEDICTjXES
Books and stationary
Also a new large, arid well selected stock
ot
WALL PAPER
AND
Curtain Jhriging
mns
AWARDED
Caprine
6
Porous
MEDALS.
Plaster,
The Best Known Remedy for ;
Backache or Lame Back.
Rheumatism or Lame Joints.
Cramps or Sprains.
Neuralgia or Kidney Diseases.
Lumbago, Severe Aches or Pains
Female Weakness.
Are Superior to nil other PImatera.
Are Superior to Pad.
Are Superior to l.lalinenta.
Arc Superior to Ointment or Salea.
Are superior to Electricity or ssJtb
TUey Act Immediately.
They Strencthen,
They Soothe.
They Relieve Tain at Ol
They Positively Car.
nillTinil Bcnson'eCapelnaPorotuPUa
I flllllllra trx hnre been imitated. Do
OH U I I V 1 1 nil tnm mr aruggtet to
pnlm off m oth.-r plaster having 4 similar
foundiDi? name. See that the word is ppellad
C-A-P-C-I-N E. Price 85 eta.
StABURT &. JOHNSON. .
Mourns' turirnr Ch hum. ,
1, j-w 1 or.
A
Ml UK itlAIliV AY I..T. PrU-eiSle.
MAD'3Meaica!ed COM tni KLNION PLASTER.
1 .i ' r'
y, lfcUFSBD & 00.,
2?ocfc-IsLinii, 111.
ursrs 01
SULKY 10 GAHS PLOWS.
CULTIVATORS,
S l'- '
vP C DRILL,
;$. e be, etc.
.i.'-A'.'.S .ITT, X o.
i'.. JOSEPH, Mo.
:;;i.Vt ACKi:E, wu.
tit, St'j.
A-r cur riars. mailed free
BUY THE BEST.
POST A CO'S
AMERICAN STUDENT LAMP.
GUARANTEED THE BEST.
'THONG, STEADY LICHT.
:C TIMES CHKAPF.R THAN
By lotiff Experienc we
;-re enabled to taak; ttae BEST .
iTVlEXX JLA.M.P MADE, and the
r- -Vi r one that nl&e and towers ,
die wick aM etbown in enk Pnlljr '
covered toy letter patent. Price,
Nickel Plated. SS.OO. ZJneral
Dlsconiits to the Trade. Send
for Catalogue
POST & COMPANY,
manufacturers and Patentees,
CINCINNATI, OHIO.
aJBBB jar
fiRi ..fcMOTEIT LAKE)
IHIIIIDIES
an
LEWIS HOFFMAN
(Successor o)
S. IUKSCII & CO.
?utlicut truriicr t 1 he .iiuai. ,
pay tin- liiu'ii-.t irif' in CASH ior
IIIDKS. IViM,,
l'K!lS TAI.I.OW.
KK ATI! Kits, HAGs
h.v.pekt:: n
IKaLKK in
1 Ul? IV IT I J It IZ .
BAUY CAll It I A c; 1 :
or all atyifftaini pr.ie.
3)1 Heir. Always on Hand
Mtedt and luriiishi-d on liort iioriw
Onlt'rs may he h'lt t F. . Kviins' stable
alti-r niirlit uron SnfJ:iv. Ilutler. Mo
Ayer's
Hair Vigor,
FOR RESTORING GRAY HAIR TO ITS
NATURAL VITALITY AND COLOR.
It is a most agreeable dressing, which
Is at once Lanuless and ellt'Ctual, for pre
serving the hair. It restores, with the
gloss and freshness of youth, faded or gray,
light, and red hair, to a rich brown, or deep
black, as may be desired. By its use thin
hair Is thickened,, and baldness often
though not always cured. Il checks fulling
of the hair immediately, and causes a new
growth in all cases where (he glands are
not decayed; while to brashy, weak, or
otherwise diseased hair, il Imparts vitality
and strength, and renders it pliable. ...
The Vigor cleanses the scalp, cures and
prevents the formation of dandruff; and,
by its cooling, stimulating, and soothing
properties, it ho;ils most if not all of the
humors and diseases peculiar to the scalp,
keeping it cool, clean, and soft, under
which conditions diseases of the scalp and
hair are impossible. .
As a Dressing for Ladies' Hair
The Vigor is incomparable. It Is color-'
less, contains neither oil nor dye, and will
not soil white cambric. It imparts an
agreeable and lasting perfume, and as an
article fur the toilet it is economical aud
unsurpassed in its excellence.
Prepared by Dr. J. C. AyerSiCo.,
I'mcticul and Analytical ChcmlnU.
Lowell, Mass.
ECU) BT ALL filiUGGISTS KVEBTWiiCRB.
A SURE CURE FOR
Sick Headache, Dyspepsia, Langour,
Hervoui Eihaastioa arising from oyer
work or exces of any Hud,
-AX3 FOR
Female Weaknesses.
IT I'KtViiXfS
Malarial Tvwm zjAIwi el
' And U a h-t-cdt.c for Oiliest'
CONSTIPATION.
mzz f.oo Pin bot:lj six for $5 oo
MEYER BOS. &. CO.
e:eta!c A -eaia. Ki.i Cy ! St- to"
A' - n r- 1 y m , a