Southern ladies' journal., August 07, 1886, Page 8, Image 10

About Southern ladies' journal. (Little Rock, Ark.) 1886-18??

Image provided by: Arkansas State Archives

                
8
House and Home
We ■will be grateful to any of our friends who will
■Contribute matter to this column of good short
extracts for home life, industry and amnsement.
KEEPING THE BOYS AT HOME
IN THE EVENING.
PRIZE ESSAY BY MRS. M. A. ROEGER.
“ I know just the time when my
mothei lost my confidence,” said a
young minister to me. “It was one
day when about nine years old on
coming home from school, I began to
tell her some bad language that I had
heard. She stopped me saying, ‘Oh
now, Georgie, you must not come home
and tell me everything that you hear at
school.’ These words burst on me like
a peal of thunder. They struck me
dumb. I walked out doors, but the sun
was darkness and tne moon gave no
light, although it was only three o’clock
in the afternoon. Up to that time when
ever I had seen or heard anything that
was wrong I had told mother, but she
never again had to tell me not to repeat
what I heard at school. And my boyish
confidence in and veneration for my
mother’s judgment were broken.”
What a mistake that mother made!
Here was her golden opportunity to
point out the evil and warn against it.
So long as she held her boy’s confidence
she had him safe, for as the childish
mind poured itself out to her, she could
see the direction of the current and turn
or strengthen it. She- had not studied
her child s character, or she would have
known that with him only one such re
pulse could ever be made. How few
mothers make a study of their children’s
charade)s; yet this is the key to suc
cessful government. She who under
stands hei own nature, who remembers
the influences which dominated her
during her child's pre-natal life and
caiefully watches the unfolding of the
human flower, until she knows just
where the shoots must be broken off and
what conditions are needed for the de
velopment of this or that part of the
plant; she it is whose “children shall
rise up and call her blessed.”
Another cementing influence which
parents often neglect is the cultivation
of affection between brothers and sisters.
When one receives candy suggest that
he share with the others and save some
for the absent. Thus not only a loving
thoughtfulness is learned but a lesson of
unselfishness. This consideration for
others may be carried into everv depart
ment of child life. I say child~Mfe,be-
cause the keeping of the boys at home
must be begun when they are young.
An eminent English jurist says, “A
large majority of all the criminals who
are brought before me have been made
what they are by being allowed to be
away from home evenings, between the
ages of eight and sixteen.” This being
the case how are the boys to be kept at
home? The first essential is a cheerful,
pleasant mother. She need not be finely
clad; if her dress is neat and her face
good and kind, she will make in her
boy’s mind a picture so attractive that
no pretty barmaid will easily supplant
it. But this is not enough; the home
also must be made such a bright and
cheery place that the mere thought of it
will quicken his returning steps.
“ How is this to be done?” Instead of
having bare, white walls, cover them
with pretty paper, which can be bought
for twelve cents a roll. Turkey red
calico at eight cents a yard will make
the old chairs look gay and comfortable.
Cretonnes and colored canton flannels
make rich and inexpensive window cur
tains. And a few pots of flowers, two
or three good photographs and chromos,
and your dreary room becomes cosy and
homelike. Do not be afraid to light the
parlor fire and use the best room. No
place is too good for our husbands and
children. A pleasant place and a loving
mother are a good deal, but not all;
employment must be found for head and
hands. The whole philosophy of the
matter lies in keeping the mind active
at work or play. When the father sits
asleep in the chimney corner and the
mother silently mends or knits, the
quiet and dullness become insupportable
and Jack starts out to play: first on the
street corner, then to loaf, smoke, drink
and gamble in the saloon. Young man
hood is full of desire for action. It
wishes to reach out and touch life at
manifold points. It longs for a vent for
its energies and only seeks the street
and saloon because it must be going or
doing. The undue expression of this
eager restlessness is merely the dam
ming of water, the break will inevitably
come; but B if the stream is allowed to
flow naturally it can be directed into the
best channels. The question is, how to
do this. Let parents plan to give them
selves wholly to their children two or
three evenings every week. Invite
their playmates to spend the evening
and find out whether or not they are the
boys with whom you wish your sons to
associate. Have games, such as
authors, checkers, snap, French cha
rades, making poetry, shadow bufF,
shadow pantomimes, the menagerie,
t ie eyetests, the moving circle, proverbs,
etc. I mention these games only as ex-
amples. Parents
own programme. In
J* ““’ie; in another Sit,
XT" g ! ina,hird ’ r^ 1 i
tlln g; m a fourth 11 »
“ taffy pull.” ’ P p m
denly awakened to the
band and sixteen, J***
pending their evenings in
company. She immediately*’
her business to find plays, J*
for the evemngs’entertain,n ent \
nightslater the husband was »
leaving the house, when hh s?
“Father, you had better .7 :
and see what jolly times we ha, e ’
did stay, and both father and s „ n ,
saved. Os course only part o f 4, t
ought to be given to mere am®,,
If there is the slightest musical abi
in the family, that should be cart
cultivated. If you cannot afford api
or organ, buy your boy a concertina
violin. The mere possession of the
strument often awakens the desire
use it. Has one child a taste for dr;
ing? You can get, for twenty-five cei
in any toy store, a drawing frame«
a dozen wood cuts of animals, e
which laid under the frosted glass i
be easily traced on it with pencil,
box of paints and a few pictures i
furnish many an evening’s enter;;
ment. Any father or brother can mi
a blackboard, which, with a piece
chalk, will be a constant joy to
younger members.
Among the families of my associa
is one of seven or eight boys, most
whom are “ children of a larger grow
now. The relation between th
parents and children always seemed
me very charming. True, it is no
home of wealth, but of culture <
music. Yet, after all, human nature
about the same, in palace 01 cotta
The father and mother are always mt
ested in the plays of their child l '
often joining them and suggesting •
provements here and there. This at
ever fertile in resources, utilize
frame of an old sewing machine t
a bracket saw, and that alone has p
employment to each succeeding
and brackets, shelves, clocks, <■• ‘•'
Santa Claus, Christmas after C>
The youngest son, about t lr e . ■
old, never thinks of going™',
per without asking his mot a „
sion, and knowing how
stay. Occasionally th
gives over the kitchen to »
little friends, and the evening
having a delightful ta y ,
one time it is hammock m
other the modeling of c ay