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Idaho Springs siftings. (Idaho Springs, Colo.) 1900-1905, May 17, 1902, Image 3

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn90051005/1902-05-17/ed-1/seq-3/

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AS THE WORLD
REVOLVES
RED FOX OUTWITS HIS PURSUER
Reynard Makes Use or a Boat to Escape
from a Hunter.
Farmer Hudson of Ararat, Pa., had
a queer experience while hunting red
foxes on the mountain above his
home. A fox that had given him a
lively chase ran down a steep hill and
dashed toward the Susquehanna river
where a boat was lying loosely on the
shore. The force of the jump sent
the craft out in the stream, and when
Hudson came up the boat was in
the middle of the river, floating down
the current.
In the boat, standing on the seat in
the stern, was the fox, gazing back at
his baffled pursuer with considerable
satisfaction. Hudson discovered an
other boat on shore, and quietly
pushing it off, paddled after the boat
that was bearing the fox away. The
fox’s boat was gradually being carried
by the current nearer the opposite
shore, and by the time the hunter in
his boat was half way from the start
ing point of the fox’s boat, the latter
was within a rod or two of the oppo
site shore.
MEMORIAL TO GREAT GERMAN POET
Emperor William Approves the Model
for the S atue of Goethe.
Emperor William has approved ol
the model which has been made for
, the statue of Goethe to be erected at
Rome and work on the monument will
be hurried to completion. The illus
iftration shows the head of the statue,
pronounced by sculptors to be perfec
! tion in art.
BEAUTIFUL SOLDIERS’ MONUMENT
St. Joseph County, Indiana, Remembers
It* Departed Heroes.
It is doubtful if the people of any
• county in Indiana have erected to the
memory of its dead soldiers a monu
ment that is finer or more expensive
than the one that has been planned
for St. Joseph county. This county
, sent its full share of soldiers to the
early wars, and the number of volun
teers that lesponded to the call dur
, ing the civn war was large. The de-
sign accepted for the St. Joseph coun*
ty monument will cost $25,000.
Why He Had No Dog.
Joseph Jefferson was asked the oth
! er day why he never introduced a dog
; into ‘‘Rip Van Winkle,” and this was
, his reply: ‘‘lf I had brought on a real
r dog he would never have pleased
I everyone, because each one had a spe
■ cial idea of what sort of a dog
Schneider ought to be. And if the
tail of the dog of realism had wagged
once at the wrong time it would have
, sDoiled evervthino-.”
THE HUMOR OF LIFE.
JOKES AND JESTS WRITTEN WITH
INTENT TO BE AMUSING.
Woos of Early Egyptian Poet* —Tramp
Resents Suggestion of Well-Meaning
Old-Lady—Youngster Thought Circus
Better Than Prayer Meeting.
Made In Heaven.
Little Ethel, a Columbus five-year
old, recently heard her mamma say
that there wasn’t a match in the house.
That night when the mother heard
Ethel’s prayer the little girl concluded
by saying: ‘‘And please, Dod, send us
a box uv matches. Amen.”
‘‘Why do you ask God for matches,
Ethel?” asked the parent in surprise.
“Coz,’ replied Ethel, ‘‘didn’t Aunt
Ruth say that matches wuz made in
heaven?”—Ohio State Journal.
Slightly Nervous.
Everything was in readiness. The
groom, best man and the minister
were gathered in the vestry. The or
ganist began to play and the minister
started for the door.
“Wait one moment, doctor,” called
the nervous groom. Is it the right or
left hand the ring goes on?”
~rr tie left,” hurriedly replied the
minister.
“And doctor, is—is it kisstermary to
cuss the bride?
But the minister had fled.
A Horrible Suggestion.
*“Did you see the prince?”
“Yes.”
“What do you think of him?”
“Well,” answered the man who has
a hollow where the bump of venera
tion ought to be, “he has my approval.
He knows what's business. He real
izes that nobody would pay to see him
and is willing to give the show free
for the sake of the advertisement.”—
Washington Star.
Livelier.
The child of strict parents, whose
greatest joy had hitherto been the
weekly prayer meeting, was taken to
the circus by his nurse. When he
came home:
“O mamma,” he exclaimed, “if you
once went to the circus you’d never go
to prayer-meeting again in all your
life.”—North American.
A Relief.
“You are taking a great deal of in
terest in society.”
“Yes,” answered Senator Sorghum.
“I used to make fun of receptions and
that sort of thing. But I declare it’s
something of a relief to get into a
gathering of people where nobody
can make a political speech or a touch
for a campaign fund.
Genuine Grief.
“Poor man! He was so cut up yes
terday. He got a telephone message
that his wife’s pet dog had been run
over and killed.”
“Why should the death of a dog
make him feel so badly?”
“That wasn’t it. He felt badly when
he got home and found it was all a
mistake.”
Things That Have Passed.
Upgardson—lf you are tired of your
team of Shetland ponies, why don’t
you trade them off for something?
Atom —The only trade I can make
is with Thankersley. He offers to
give me two or three dozen Belgian
hares for them.
A Selfish Plea.
Cora —And why should I think twice
before I refuse you?
Merritt —Because, my dear, a girl
never thinks the same twice.
In the Days of Rameses.
Egyptian Poet —"It’s not writing ’em
but taking ’em round to the publishers
that kills.”
Well Fitted.
She —The new member, Mr. Stacker,
is going to help us think of some new
schemes for making money for the
church.
He —What does he know about it?
“He is a reformed gambler.”—Life.
Good Reason.
“She doesn’t seem to be contented
with her lot in life.”
“Well, I understand it’s pretty heav
ily mortgaged.”
Within Call
The authoress, Mrs. Julius M. Thros
ton, is revising at the present time the
final sheets of a novel, said to be a
Baltimore romance, which is shortly
to be in the hands of the publishers.
She was one day this week dictating
to her amanuensis a passionate love
scene, in which the hero in intense
excitement calls to the woman of his
heart: “Darling! Sweetheart!” The
voice of the reader was unconsciously
raised in appeal when the door quickly
opened and the woolly head of a
daughter of Africa was thrust within,
while its possessor inquired in dulcet
tones, “Did you call me?”
'*}
Answered in Paradox.
Applicant—Of course, in presenting
my claims for this appointment, I do
not ask or expect any preference to be
shown; I merely desire to enter the
competition on the same footing with
the others.
Examiner—Precisely, but you must
bear in mind that in estimating com
parative fitness, a man’s footing will
have little to do with it; it will be his
head that will establish his standing.
His Idea.
Tramp. Yes’m; I takes er bath ’bout
oncet er month.
Kind Lady. You should bathe three
or four times a week.
Tramp. Say! look! I ain’t no mer
maid.
Pressing.
The girl wrote feverishly, turning
out four or five great historical novels
per month.
As she was but 15, her entourage
were concerned and remonstrated.
“Will you take time to bud into
womanhood ?” said they.
“Well, I should say nit!” replied
she. “Why, this can be done any
time, regardless of market condi
tions.”—New York Sun.
A Sense of Indignation.
u i iuu igimuoK.
“It’s a shame!” exclaimed Meander
ing Mike, as he tossed the piece of
newspaper from him.
“What was you readin’ about?” ask
ed Plodding Pete.
“Dese donations by Andrew Carne
gie. It’s a shame to be spendin’ so
much money for libraries when dey
orter be buyin’ cook books fur some o’
dese jails we have to stop at.”
One of His Ways.
“I can’t think,” said the girl with the
Julia Marlowe dimple, “what made Al
gy act so strangely last night.”
“Did he propose to you at any time
during the evening?” asked the girl
with the Maude Adams nose.
’“Yes.” •
“Then he must have been drinking.”
Balloonists Need Passports.
The Russian officials have an
nounced that balloonists must have
passports. This means that should
you drop out of a balloon and fall into
Russian territory the result my be
serious to you. if you are found to be
without a passport signed by a Rus
sian consul.
The Secret
“How does it come you write such
lovely dialect verse?” asked the en
thusiastic editor.
Why, you see,” replied the budding
author, “I use a stub pen, and lots of
ink, write left-handed with my eyes
blindfolded.”
He Was Shrewd.
“Bunkins takes life very easily.”
“But he is always telling hard-luck
stories.”
“Yes; that shoiys his shrewdness. If
he put in all that time telling funny
stories people would say he was loaf
ing.”
His Definition.
“What is your idea of a statesman?”
“A statesman?” said Farmer Corn
tossel, “is an officeholder who can quit
thinkin’ about quail on toast once in a
while and remember the American
eagle.”
Conldn’t Be Mistaken.
Miriam—What makes you so posi
tive Miss Bereleaf is past 40?
Mellicent—Au infallible sign—she is
beginning to wear hats suitable for
girls of 20.
YOU MAY GET |
i? IN TIME g
“But You'll I
rlave to Hurry” |
TO GET THE BEST LUMBER AND ALL J
KINDS BUILDING MATERIAL, &
i Lime, Cement, Hair Plasieß, Latb, Shingles, Fire Clay, |)r
! Sash, Doors, Blinds, Mouldings, Finest Stock in the
| City of Native Eastern and Southern Pine.
i LARGE MILL AND MINING TIMBERS A SPECIALTY C
Moscript 3D, Hassell I
In the West End
BUSH & BONNEY
Insurance Agency & Realty
PHONES 40 and 23-2
We represent the leading companies of the world for
every kind of Insurance
Life, Fire, Accident, Health, Steam Boiler, Employers’
Liability, Surety Bond, Plate Glass, Mining Plants, Mills
Real Estate Bought and Sold
REAL ESTATE, MINES,*
INSURANCE AND LOANS.
....1613 MINER STREET, IDAHO SPRINGS, COLORADO....
♦ U/ye . . CAPITAL STOCK T 1
wpw wj $50,000.00 77
XT* * SURPLUS FUND T X
\ : NATIONAL
| ; BANK “■' mm J |
7,7 X X
X * Drafts Sold on all Foreign Countries ;
t | Safety Deposit Boxes for rent ♦ ♦
| ? Interest paid on Time Deposits |
♦ ♦
♦ ♦ HENRY PLUMMER, JACOB J. ELLIOTT, t X
4 4 President. Vice President, i ♦
X Cashier. F. E. ANGOVE, Asst Cashier, f |
Colorado’s Popular line j
IS THE l
-f
Colorado and
Southern Ry. j
—■ - 1,1 11 ■■ " 1 4
Best and Most Convenient Service Between 4
Denver,
Colorado Springs, f
Pueblo, j
Cripple Creek and :
Trinidad I
It is also the Short Line Connecting
TEXAS AND COLORADO :
•y-
Through trains carry handsome Pullman sleepers and ele- ♦
gant Cafe cars. (Meals a la carte.) 4
■ 7-
T. E. FISHER, |
General Passenger Agent, Denver, Colorado. X
4
a. a a a x 4

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