The Meeker herald. [volume], February 20, 1909, Image 3

About The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current

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FOOLED BY
A NAME
“These soft, syrupy names for
towns,” began a traveling man as he
bit off the end of his perfecto sav
agely, “never any more of ’em for
mine: “I’ve got to know after this
all about a town, just what slse map
It breaks la on, and some more things
before 111 fall for its purty name.
There may be a lot of good towns
with mystic, euphonious names that
you’d,rather have In your mouth than
a bite of chocolate, but they don’t get
my money. Nope! Nix! Hue uh! I’ve
got to know more'n just the name aft
er this.
"Here’s what I’m getting at,” says
the reminiscent drummer. “Something
made me think just now of my trip
down through Florida somebody
spoke of taking a run down to Miami,
and Reminded me of it—and 1 recalled
my little stay at Zolfo Springs.
“Now, just take that name Zolfc
Springs and noli your tongue around
it once or twice. Pretty good, ain’t it?
Doesn’t it just sort of conjure up pipe
dreamy effects of broad hotel plaszaa
and fluffy, chiffony, pink-cheeked
southern belles floating around, and
neat little tables here and there with
mint juleps and seltzer bottles and
things on ’em? Ain’t that the sort of
truck that flits right into your mind
the minute you say ‘Zolfo Springs?’
Can’t you look out through the palm
trees and see the crimson sunset on
the job? You can feel the balmy Flor
ida breezes on your cheek, can't you
—and hear the tinkle of the man
dolins and—well, you know? Doesn’t
that ’Zolfo Springs' name just bring
up all that sybarite stuff, though?
“Well, it was about this time of
year I was In Florida, and. I had bo
run down to Fort Meyers and some
other towns down in there for a day
or two. I can’t tell now just where it
was I heard the name, but 1 woke up
one morning with ‘Zolfo Springs’ rub
bing and beating against my tympan
um. It struck me that it would be
better to stop off some place like that
than to try to make the run down to
Fort Meyers over night, i’ll just stop
off at the springs,’ I says to myself,
‘until morning and then jump on down
to Fort Meyers.’ And so I did.
"On the way down the conductor
came up and asked me: ‘Are you sure
you want to get off at Zolfo Springs?’
“ ‘Certainly,’ I told him. But I did
not get wise. Within half a mile of
the springs he came along again and
• asked me if I wanted to get off there,
and If I was acquainted with any one
at that point. I told him I was, just
to keep him qnlet.
“After the train had gone gn I
Idoked around to see where they’d left
me. There was a little shed of a sta
tion and that was all, except about
three feet of sand everywhere you
stepped. I looked around for a wagon
to take me to the hotel, but there was
none* There wasn’t a human be
ing or a house in sight It was getting
dark, too. I started up the road and
after I'd walked about two miles, car
rying my grip, through the sand, I
came upon a colored man. “Where’s
the hotel?* I aaked him. ‘Ain’t none,’
he says.
“He volunteered, though, to take me
up to Cap’n Smith’s house to see If
I could get lodging there for the night,
as that was the only house within
walking distance. We arrived at the
captain’s place, an old shack, at 11
o’clock. It took me about 20 minutes
to talk him into keeping me over
night, and then he had to go back to
talk it over with ‘the old woman.*
Finally he said he would move ‘Sis*
over Into their room and give me her
bed.
“Next morning when I got np I
found that ‘Sis’ was an Idiot about IS
years old, and ‘pa’ and ‘ma* lanky
Florida ‘crackers,’ who were contin
ually rubbing snuff. They ate off a
table consisting of pine bosrds laid
on boxfes. There were ‘greens’ soaked
in grease, ‘chicory’ instead of coffee
ant some leaden biscuits. Of course
I couldn’t eat anything. And I could
not get a train out of the place until
night. I was just about all in when I
got down to Arcadia, 20 miles south,
that night!
“Ah, no more of those pretty name*
for me!**
That Awful Gift of Imagination.
If you wish to pray against a but
den of temptation, pray against that
awful gift (for It is a purely Involun
tary gift) of imagination which alter
nately flatters and torments its pos
sessor—flatters him by making him
fancy that he possesses the virtues
which he can Imagine in others; tor
ments him, because it makes him feel,
In himself a capacity for every imag
inable form of vice. Yet If it be a
gift of Ood’s (and it cannot be a gift
of the devil's) it must bring some
good, and perhaps the good is the
capacity for sympathy with black
guards, **publieaas and sinners.” To
see into the inner life of these; to
know,their disease, not from books,
buttYrou) Inward and scientific anato
my, imagination may help a man; II
it does that for me I shall not regret
it; though it is, selfishly speaking, the
wost humiliating and tormenting of
II talents. —Charles Kingsley.
Enormous Electric Fewer.
The New York Edison Company has
about customers on its lines ex
tending over Manhattan Island and the
borough of the Bronx. Current is fed
through SIAM meters to an equivalent
of lamps. The electric motors
taking current from the company fig
ure up aheet 184,000 horsepower.
-»o«s_i»AßAan*nM
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
The virtues we are proudest of we
practice because we have to.
A compensation to a sinner is‘'to
feel how those who condemn him
envy him.
Some of the fixings a woman weara
where people can’t see them are in
case they should.
A man feels more self-respect for be
ing able to discount a note than be
would for not having to do It
The reason there will be no purga
tory for a woman iu the next world
la she gets it here in suffering man.
A girl who aets out to marry a
millionaire ia lucky if the doesn’t
wind up by getting only her board
out of it.
Husbanda are almost Indispensable
for lifting things to the top shelf of
closets, carving and threatening to
whip the ..children.
When a man happens to guess wbat
the weather turns out to be he wants
you to think he could have become a
famous scientist If he had made that
his profession.
After a girl accepts a man who un
expectedly proposes to her a great
disappointment to he;- is she was so
excited for fear he would get scared
off that she forgot to recite a beauti
ful piece of sentiment that she had
got ready for him when It happened.—
Sew York Press.
WHAT WOMEN FORGET.
Women sometimes forget—
That there are two sides to every
question.
That nerves are not conducive to a
Vere de Vere manner.
That children are Just as suscepti
ble to “mothering" as dogs.
That there are two essentials to
her success —tact and charm of man
ner.
That the “School for Scandal" is not
a recognized educational institution
which fits her for the “School of
Life.”
That the hope of every woman lies
in one of two directions —to make
or take a name for herself.
That the reason they are less con
tented than men is that women mag
nify their troubles and men pass over
the small things—they are content to
“let the.little world pass by.”
That her personality, her little airs
and graces, her faults and foibles are
all instrumental in shaping the man
ners of men, and that she has only
herself to blame or praise for their
attitude toward her.
That it Is good for her to close
eyes to all externals at least once
every day and soar quite away into
oblivion—then to come back and be
happy for the rest of the hours.—
New York Evening Post.
A BACHELOR’S REFLECTIONS.
The poor girl with the matchmaking
mother always Bee ms to have an imp
of a little brother to break the engage
ment.
You can never tell what a Woman ia
going to do, which accounts for the
fact that the unexpected happens so
often.
While it Is all right for a woman to
help her husband, many a girl starts
In early by helping her sweetheart to
propose.
Never blame a woman for not tak
ing her husband to church with her;
perhaps be has the habit of talking in
his sleep.
A woman’s idea of the value of mon
ey is usually limited to the knowledge
that It will buy whatever she sets her
heart on.
When a man is young he always
wants to have his own way; after
wards be gets married and then he
never has it.
A man who objected to Ms wife join
ing an Audubon dnb figured oat that
It was Just an excuse to get a new bon
net, as her old one had birds on it
NEW DEFINITIONS.
Truth Is not politeness.
Bluff Is not assurance.
Recognition is not success.
Generosity is not promising.
Sensitiveness I i not cowardice.
Indifference is not good nature.
Taste is not following the fashion.
Divorce is not a desire for freedom.
A drama is not a climax surrounded
by staffed figures.
Prosperity Is not owning an auto
mobile and owing money.
Temperament does not mean ran
ning off with another man’s wife or
another woman’! husband
CURRENT VERSE.
Ths Land of Vanished Hours.
Where la the summer, ths gay, glad
summer,
Radiant with light and bright* with
flowers?
It has given place to this sad newcomer.
Who has stripped the trees and scorohed
the bowers.
And where are the summers beloved and
departed
Which long, long ago gave Joy to the
earth?
Where then is the one when the lion
hearted
King Richard reigned and the Crusades
had birth?
And where is the one which saw Kenil
worth’s glory.
Which the stately Elisabeth deigned to
review?
And when Shakespeare lived, and his pen
told each story
Which comes down through the years,
ever living and new?
Where is the summer when life spread
before us
Sweet to the heart and fair to the view.
When we saw no cloud in the asure sky
o’er us.
When earth was all glory and each
friend was true?
Oh, the late and the )ong ago summegn
art* dwelling
In a piqpe warm with sunshine and.
lovely with flowers;
There each to the other Its story is
tolling
In the beautiful land of the vanished
hours!
—Ninette M. Lowater, in New York Sun.
Tha Holots.
You on the hearth, your head against my
knee;
I In a wicker chair, your hand In mine;
A grateful firelight, flaring frostily,
Bets the brown redness of your hslr
ashine.
Your Ups creep up to meet my lips crept
down,
While all the azure velvet of your eyes
At once implores and conquers; and I
crown.
Your lips with kisses, till our madness
dies.
Then silence, fear and silence, lest ths
gods.
That.have us both In hate, lopk down
and see—
Almost it seems that Jove, the Jealous,
nods.
And leaves his poor, unheeded Helots
free.
Surely the high gods slumber or forget
The gall, the wormwood und the bitter
leaven?
Ah, sweet, your lips again. A moment
yet.
To filch a fleeting happiness from
heaven!
—Westminster Gazette.
Whan Pa Shingled.
When I was but a little i-hap-Toh, many
years ago— ’
I well reeall the day because It was a
day of woe;
Pa he had shingled of his house, with
some to Spare, he thought.
But when he come to finish off he found
that he was short.
"My boy," said he quite harsh to me, “da
you know where they be?“
At first I w-ouldn’t tell an’ then fear took'
ahold of me.
My pa, enraged, demanded why X hM
them from his sight.
"Becuz,” said I. with te«r and sigh arid
trembling from affright,
“I didn't want none left around for fear
—for fear, you see.
They’d come In play 'most any day for
use In spankin' me.”
My pa he didn't say a word, but ent a
paddle out
An* fitted It—l won't say where—a hun
dred times about;
I well recall the day and all, though dis
tant It may be.
Cuz when pa shingled of his house hs
' also shingled me.
—Joe Cone, In New York Sufi.
Tha I dan I.
As doth the vagrant wind desire tha
fin me.
And search the gusty alleys of the dark.
Tenacious, urgent. Instant in its claim
Upon the houseless and unguarded
spark;
So hath my soul sought thine through
devious ways.
Through proud resistances and scorn ex
pressed.
Under light laughter, sober-minded dis
praise,
And cool-browed Insult and fleet-footed
'Jest.
For I did see with eyes that looked
through mist
Ever some brightness In the night and
day;
Ever did have some voice that well X
wist
Was thine above the Jargon of the way.
And now, that I do stand before thy
face,
I know that X have run and won ths
race.
—Humphreys Park, In Appleton’s Maga
zine.
Tyranny.
De clock It keep a-tlckln*
An* a-mmrkin’ off de time;
De hands a-slidln’ down awhlls.
Den startin’ in to climb,
An’ brlngln’ roun' de settln* sun
Befo* my work la through;
I wish she’d take it easy
An’ lay off an hour or two.
She plays a march time fob da hsartk
Dat’s why dey pass so soon;
We’s skasa got over sunrise till
We hits de afternoon;
She’s got me steppln’ lively to
Dat clickin’, clackin’ song;
I wlsht she’d mind her business an*
Stop shovin’ me along.
—Washington Star.
Whan Forth You Faro.
When forth you fare to pick a flow*r.
Spurn not the timid violet;
Though roses fair have odors rare.
They have thorns, too, oh. don’t forget!
When forth you fare to quench your
tlilmt.
Spurn not the waters from the spring;
Though ruddy wine may seem divine.
It ever leaves behind a sting!
When forth you fare In search of lova.
Spurn not the modest little miss;
The siren’s lure can ne’er endure.
And misery replaces bliss!
—Town Topics.
A Fllgrim.
As onward o’er life’s tortuous road
I plod my way and bear my load
Let me attempt, let me aspire.
To gain some goal of high desire!
By no false glamour on me shed
Let my adventurous feet be led.
But though at times they tire.
To gain some goal of high desire!
Until for me the final sun
Outshines my pilgrim path upon.
Still be my aim, till light expire.
To gain some goal of high desire!
BY THE GENTLE CYNIC.
It’s the under dog tbst howls for
Uie peacemaker.
The more you nurse a grievance the
faster it grows.
He who laughs best doesn’t have
the laugh on him.
You can help a lot sometimes by
got giving advice.
Even love’s young dream sometimes
dies of old age.
Some people are almost as stuck
op as a pincushion.
Trouble never dodges the fellow
Who is looking for it.
Every time a woman changes her
mind she also airs her views.
It seems as though Fate had select
ed some men to be punching bags.
Many a fellow who isn’t very strong
parries around a big opiniom of him
self.
. He who is on the winning side is
the one who preaches the triumph of
right.
When It comes to wedding cards,
it’s the bride’H deal and the bride
groom’s ante.
If it is tr.ue that the ddvil is the
fgther of lies, he must have a mighty
big family.
It takes a certain amount of cheek
to kiss a girl, but she is generally
willing to supply the cheek.
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
A lazy man is always ready to hand
you free advice.
Old age comes In a canter to tho
man who goes the pace.
Among other pipe lines are those
written in favor of smoking.
An ex-husband is apt to think that
alimony means all the money.
'f. By standing up for yourself others
may be prevented from sitting down
on you.
If some women haven’t any one to
talk to they chew gum so their jaws
Won’t get rusty.
, - A woman who wants to make soap
kaz no kick coming if her neighbors
! *»™ her the lye.
/rjlMlit tjin man who thinks he
idjows It all the worst thing is his in
ability to keep his mouth shut.
The coat may not make the man,
but it certainly helps some when the
mercury is flirting with the zero mark.
Perhaps nothing makes a girl so
angry as the thought that a young
man thinks she would not resent be
ing kissed.
A health journal has an article on
"How to Lie When Asleep." What we
need ia a few pointers on how to in
duce people to tell the truth when
awake.—Chicago News.
WITH THE SAGES.
“Whoso suffers most has most to
glve^—King.
Life Is learning, suffering, loving;
and the greatest of these is loving.—
Ellen Kay.
Make up your mind to act decidedly
and take the consequences. No good
is ever done in this world by hesita
tion.—Huxley.
Reasonable thought of to-morsow
advances the work of to-day, but anx
iety for what Is still before us defeats
its, own end.—Parsons.
To work out our own contentment,
we should labor not so much to in
crease our substance as to moderate
our desires.—Sanderson.
Ail the time thou llvest ill thou hast
trouble, distraction, inconveniences of
life, but not the secrets and uses of
it.—Fuller.
Let every man be occupied in the
higheat employment of which his na
ture is capable, and die with the con
sciousness that he has done his best
—Bydney Smith.
A WOMAN’S VIEWPOINT.
The girl who appropriates a man’s
love Is liable to penal servitude for
lift.
Fortunately the most imposing fam
ily trees have their roots well out ef
eight
Many a “faithful" dog has died At
his post after greedily eating the burg
lar's poisoned meat.
Before marriage a man asks but for
one little word, afterward he gets s
plenty without the asking.
The big gamble is not so much in
the jackpot, but whether wifey will
befleve the story you bring home.
The longer a man studies the curvet
of a decanter the closer he is apt te
imitate them on his homeward jour-
THE |
Rifle, Meeker, Craig
1 STAGE AND EXPRESS LINE
a Connections at Meeker for Rangely, the new oil and asphalfurn 8
5 fields, and all points In Rio Blanco ard Routt counties. S
| General Passenger, Express and Freight Business *
| Livery Stable at Rifle f
a For Information and Rates, address S
i A. REES & SON. Proprietors \
£ MEEKER. COLORADO. j
H. A. WILDHACK =
Notary Public and Conveyancer
Attend to Pre-Emption and Desert Land filings, take and ac
knowledge annual or final proofs on Desert claims as well as Pre
emptions, institute contests, etc. Necessary blanks on band.
MEEKER, COLO.
U/>e
MEEKER
HERALD
JAMES LYTTLE, Edi,or and Publisher
The
Pioneer Newspaper
■
in
Rio Blanco Count*
Best Advertising Me
dium in Northwest
ern Colorado
Up-to Date Equipment
Fine Job Plant
ADDRESS:
THE HERALD
Meeker, Colorado