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The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, April 14, 1917, Image 2

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A Duel Which
Became a Farce
By M. QUAD
CopyrtelU. tho McClure
NvwspMpcM Syndicate.
have told you. sub.” said ColoueJ
Hunker. "thill ji solemn thing ••oulil
easily l»e turned Into a farce. A duel I*
m very soleuiu thing very »«.leuiu
And y«t I Ihive seen one or two of
them turned Into a far e by a slight
Incident. I will Illustrate. null.
“At the battle of Chantilly I receiv
ed a pistol bullet In the shoulder. It
Ilea there atuoug the muscles. and the
purgeou advised me to let It remain
for awhile. It did not bother me long,
aud 1 was back with my command.
In fact. sub. that bullet did not give
me much Inconvenience until ufler the
wab. Then I felt that the surgeons
must dig It out. I went to one In our
owu town. His name was Itlcbards.
and be was not only a good aurgeou.
but a thorough gentleman. He found
the bullet aud extracted It without any
difficulty.
** *1 have been told.’ said the sur
geon. that you killed seventeen of the
enemy with your owu hands at that
battle. I don't blame you for feeling
rather proud of that record/
•••But it was only eleven, sub. aud
not seventeen.'
•• *1 have It on good authority, colo
nel. that the number was seventeen/
“This led to high words, aud I de
manded satisfaction, to which the sur
geon replied:
•• ‘Willingly, colonel, willingly.l
shall esteem It a blgb honor to cross
blsdes with you/
“Well, be was a cool hand, suah
enough. It looked as If he had Intend
ed to pick a quarrel with me. I sent
a friend to him. and a duel was quick
ly arranged. He had the choice of the
weapons, and he chose rapiers. That
suited me all right. The bullet bad
been taken from my left aboulder. and
nothing ailed my right.
“We had to go about two miles to
flud a spot where the affair could be
brought off. It was within 300 feet
of a farmhouse, and the grove
hid us from the highway was an oj>en
tine. The farmer was In a distant
field at work, and his wife seemed to
have gone away for the day. In the
gardeua surrounding the bouse were
half a dozen hives of bees, and Just
over the fence from them was a pas
ture in which five or six mules were
grazing. As we were on the other side
of the garden uo oue knew what took
place until after things had happened-
The farce, therefore, took ua by sur
prise.
“Now. sub. here to wbat happened
on the other side of the bouse as a
negro afterward described It to ua:
One of the mules leaued against the
fence to rub his itching hide. The
fence was old and weak, and a section
of It was pushed down. The mule
that did It led the way into the gar
deu. and the others followed him
They did not find much to eat there,
and they began Inspecting the bee
hives. One of them got a sting on the
nose, and he wheeled and kicked the
hire over. Of co’se there waa a row
on at once. A thousand bees, mo’ or
less, came flying out. aud they made
It very uuhappy for the mules.
“There was no fence on our side of
the house, and the mules came gallop
ing in our direction. There were bees
ahead of them, bees clinging to them
and more bees In chase. Befo' we
could understand what had happened
the mules and bees were among ua.
Principals and seconds were treated
alike. Each had a score or more of
the Insects In personal attention upon
him. There was nothing to do but
run befo' the storm.
“To our left and forty roda away
was a field of growing cotton. The
stalks were high and offered oa a
chance to brush the bisects away. The
four of us and the surgeon In attend
ance all started for this field. I think,
suit, we destroyed about half an acre
of cotton and the mules about twice
as much I remember that It coat ns
S2O to settle with the farmer and that
he had no mo* use of any of the mules
for a mouth to come.
“When we finally climbed the fence
and cot hack to the spot on which we
had been standing when the riot com
meiK-ed. my antagonist and myself
were so blind that we could scarcely
see to pick up our rapiers. Our sec
onds were still worse off. I did not
look for the duel to be resumed, but
the doctor was hot for It.
“ ’Colonel Bunker/ be said, ‘you Im
pugned my honah. You denied, sub.
In the fa<*e of my assertion that you
killed seventeen men at the battle of
Chantilly, and this affair must go on
to Its legitimate end.*
“ •But I only killed eleven, sub/ I re
plied. *1 counted them ns they fell and
put the number down In my notebook
befo* I left the spot/
“ -Then, colonel, you have that note-
book still?’
“*1 have, suh.'
“ ‘And you can show It to me as
proof that yon were right and 1 was
wrong?’
“ ’Most certainly, doctor/
“ Then I withdraw what seemed to
be an Imputation on your honah. and
if you will stop at my office on the way
home we will pick the atlngers out of
each other as well as we can and shake
hands and t>e good friends/
“And thus. sub. concluded our af
fair. though we were both badly pun
ished by the bees. A year later 1 was
bis second In au affair of honah with
another gentleman, nnd he run that
gentleman through the body befo' the
fight was a minute old. He handled
bla rapier as I bad seldom seen It ban
died. and. perhaps, the bees and the
mules came just In time to aura my
life/’
The
Scrap Book
Rather Fur Fstched.
This aiory must have been studied
over for a long time. As a matter of
fact, we believe that Solomon Beach.
Its sponsor, started on It early iu the
summer of 1015 and has only now
brought it to the pitch of perfection,
where he can bear to part with it
However. It may be spontaneous
even true —and as such we print \t.
Solomon's wife asked him for a set
of hot weather furs, and Sol laughed
her to acorn. He said that he'd fallen
for a good many fool fads, but he'd
fight against this one with hto dying
breath. Summer furs, Indeed! Pooh!
Now Solomon Beach has but one
wtfe, and In other ways also he to un
like hto putative godparent, the origi
nal Solomon. In wisdom, for Instance.
And this one wife attacked him thus,
with a fine acorn:
“What a paltry thing your love la!"
This would have crushed any one
but 8. B. But he came back with:
“Paltry thing. Indeed! If I took
your view of the matter I should call
It a peltry thing!*’
But by the time she had consulted
the dictionary the Jest had lost ita
point.—Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Couldn’t Bo Dono7
Somebody said that It couldn't bo dono.
But be, with a chuckle, replied
That "maybe It couldn’t." but ho would
be one
Who wouldn’t say no till he tried.
So ho buckled right In. with a trace of a
grin
Oa hia face. If he worried he hid It.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn't be done—and he did It.
There are thonaands to tell you It cannot
be done:
There are thousands to prophesy fail
ure.
There are thousands to point out to you.
one by one.
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But Juat buckle In with a bit of a grin;
Then take off your coat and go to It
Juat start In to sing as you tackle tha
thing
That “conn it be done”—and you'll do It.
—Edgar A. Quest.
Scotch Accent Toi Much For Him.
The only real blot on my visit to
Glasgow, says a writer In the London
Sketch, to my total Inability to speak
with a Scottish accent. I rather pride
myself, as moat people do, on my vocal
Imitative faculties, but I confess to all
the world here and now that I cannot
Imitate the Scottish accent.
My Irish to beautiful; it would make
all Dublin weep. My American is quite
good; I could nearly always get any
thing that I wanted in the shops If I
had the money. Anybody can talk
Welsh who cares to substitute “p” for
“b” and “f* for “va.**
But the Scottish accent eludes me.
Sometimes I speak a little Scottish ten
tatively to the policeman or the tram
conductors or the shopkeepers. The
policemen draw their clubs, the tram
conductors atop their trams, and the
shopkeepers put up their shutters. I
an. not quite sure, but I rather think
that I shall abandon the unequal strug.
gl«-
A Generous Thought.
A Scotch comedian whose frugality is
as notorious as he himself is famous
had an engagement in Glasgow some
years ago, and while he had a friend
who eould put him up for the week no
hotel was going to get free advertising
through hto residence within Its walls.
Hto host had just become tbe proud
possessor of a son and heir, bnt his
pride in tbe kid did not prevent him
from giving the star all the attention
the most exacting guest could expect.
The Saturday night brought a taxi to
the door, and while tbe host was carry
ing down the luggage the comedian
after bidding hto hostesa good by pulled
a handful of silver out of hto pocket
and said. “Do ye ken. Mrs. Wbitewood.
If I had a copper I wad leave It for the
bairn!”—Saturday Evening Poet.
Speaking of Meanness.
There to a very old story extant
about a woman who was noted for her
meanness. She cheai*ened everything,
and prices never could be put so low
that she did not object to them.
One day she went through the mar
ket and. after chaffering for awhile,
stopped in front of a market stall and
priced some cornmeal.
“A levy a bushel.” said the dealer.
She sniffed and examined and ham
med and hawed until finally the dealer
said sarcastically:
*T tell you wbat I'll do. Mrs. Jenkins.
I’ll give you a bushel of that meal.”
Mrs. Jenkins suiffed and examined
again and then asked:
“Is It sifted T
This to paralleled by tbe account of
a man who went into market to buy
a small piece of liver.
“How much?” he asked.
“I will make you a present of that.”
said the butcher pleasantly.
The man put on hto most knowing
look, stepped back, rubbed his hands
together, looked the butcher square in
the eye and said:
“Ain’t that rather high?”—Washing
ton Star.
Dodging an Interview.
A young reporter once called to inter
view Senator Quay and found him
reading. After formal greetings had
7>een exchanged tbe senator said: “Do
you play poker? Of course you do
Mice in awhile. Then yon will find this
one of the t>est poker storifis you ever
•aw," handing the newspaper man a
book. The reporter out of politeness
read a page. '“Ah.” said the senator.
"I see you are Interested. Take the
hook along and read It at your leisure.
Qood evening." And the dazed young
journalist was out on the sidewalk be
fore he eould recover his breath.
Choosing a
Husband
By ELINOR MARSH
Miss Virginia Ashurst waa known to
|m>mmcss a fortune produclug $20,000 a
year. Naturally she bud uo end of
sultora. aud she was quite sure that all
of them wished to marry her money
as wo!I aa herself and without her
money would uot think of marrying
herself.
She resolved to submit a aeries of
questions to each one of tbe half dozen
men who bad proposed to her. These
quest lona were to be propounded anon
ymously. the men not knowing from
whom they came. This was tbe form
of her Interrogatories:
"First.—State wbat you consider the
claims of a wife on her husband.
"Second.—Do you hold that the bus
baud or the wife should be at the bead
of the household?
"Third.—What to ill object of your
life?
“Fourth.—Do you believe in the pres
ent system of education used In schools
and colleges?
“Fifth.—Should tbe mother's or tbe
father's views be paramount In tbe
traiuing of children?
“Sixth.—Should the wife be permitted
to receive the attentlou of men other
than her tiuslmud?
“Seventh.—Should the husband be
permitted to pay attention to other
women than bis wife?
“Eighth.—What are your views aa to
the use by a busliand of money be
longing to a wife?"
Miss Ashurst hoped lu the replies to
these questions, selected with some
care, to fo*-m an opinion of the inner
selves of those who replied to them.
Had she asked them herself of her
suitors she knew that she coold not
de|>end on tbe sincerity of the an
swers. She surely bad an advantage
In not lietng known.
She was somewhat disconcerted to
find that all her suitors-were appll
cants for the baud of this wealthy un
known. The replies were all evidently
well considered and satisfactory to
her. some especially so in certain num
liers. some In others, bnt altogether
they made up a fair average. Yet
there waa no one that showed In every
nuralter Just what she wanted. Be
sides. she was miffed that every one of
the men who had tried to make her be
lieve be loved her and would he mis
erable without her waa ready to marry
another girl with a fortune. Bbe re
solved to send her list of questions to
another half dozen of her men ac
quaintances.
She received replies In every case.
Five of these replies were acceptable,
some of them being carefully, worded
and showing that tbe writer waa a
thoughtful, well balanced person,
while one treated her examination pa
per with contempt This person was
Boh Clendenin. a young fellow whom
Virginia might have considered aa one
she would like for a husband bad he
not been a sort of free lance, apparent
ly oblivious to the seriousness of life.
His reply to the number aa to tbe
claims of a wife on her husband was
that the fejver claims she had the less
likelv she would he disappointed. He
averred decidedly that the husband
shot!ld be head of the house. His ob
ject In life waa to get through It with
the least bother. He pronounced the
present system of education “rotten to
the core.” The father’s views as to
tbe training of children should be par
amount. but they never would be. No
father could ever compete with the
mother In winning tbe affection of the
children. Consequently, they would
always be Influenced by her instead of
him As to a wife or bnsband being
permitted to pay attention to other
men or women, either might do so ad
lib unless the other objected.
When It came to the last question,
concerning the use of a wife s money
by a husband, the reply was that he
was Incompetent to answer It because
he. !>elng poor, would not on any ac
count marry a rich wife, and be knew
that such a condition would surely
render the husband subservient to tbe
wife, and he had no fancy for any
such serfdom. •
Miss Ashurst. who bad started out
with one Idea, became captivated with
another. She had Intended to be guid
ed as to the suitor she should accept
by the good, hard sense Indicated In
the replies of tbe applicant. The man
showing the most depth of thought
and feeling In hto replies would be
favored. But she was much staggered
by Mr. Clendenin’s examination paper,
especially by his reply to her last
question. In which he declared that he
would not be tied to any rich woman.
What staggered her was a desire that
sprang up in her breast to make him
rat hto words.
And so It was that this human at
tribute which Is In both men and wom
en came up to interfere with Miss
Ashurst’s very sound and practical
way of choosing a husband. She re
solved to win—lf she could—tbe man
who would likely give her tbe most
trouble, for. with bis views concern
ing a poor mnn married to a rich
wife, constant friction waa to he ex
pected.
As to how Miss Ashurst won a hus
band despite his objections to marry
ing roonrß and how It all turned out
after their marriage there Is no room
here. Mr. Clendenin meant what he
said In objecting to he tied to a wife’s
fortune, and Miss Ashurst. after all.
was obliged to call in the little god to
get him. After getting him she found
him an excellent manager for her es
tate and paid no attention to It herself.
TRICKY AND BLUFFER.
The Spreading Adder Will Fool You W
You Don’t Know Him.
He's a sly creature, this snake
When he's discovered and trapped he'll
make such a hullabaloo about It. with
his hlsslug and contortions, that If
you're not wise to the fact that he's
oulv bluffing you're sure to be fright
ened. If you’re acquainted with him.
however, and refuse to run. he'll give
one final twist and roll over on hto
back, just as though he had made up
his mind to die and save you the trou
ble of killing him. But don’t be fool
ed. He's only playing possum. He’s
the spreading adder.
His tricks have resulted In all aorta
of wild stories about him. Many peo
ple believe he's poisonous, because he
spreads his head out flat and hisses
when he's disturbed. Aa a matter of
fact, he couldn't hurt you if you pick
ed him up by tbe head. He’s only
bluffing when he hisses.
Then there's another story about the
spreading adder to tbe effect that he
will bite blmself and fall over dead.
This l>elief comes from hto habit of
playing possum when he aeea he’s cor
nered and can’t escape.
The spreading adder is abont thirty
Inches long, a reddish brown and
blotched and spotted. He lives in dry
woods and on sandy hlllaldea and eats
toads and insects. He’s also called
the blowing viper or the hognosed ad
der.-Philadelphia North American.
HAS TO SPLIT HIS TIPS.
Net All tha Money the Walter Gets
Goes Into Hia Pocket.
Don't think the waiters are getting
rich. They might if they could keep
ill their tips, but—
Comes a waiter of twenty years'
service who says the roan *who does
the serving la lucky if he gets 25 per
cent of his tip money.
“We wouldn't complain much if we
were allowed to keep our tips," he said,
“but the waiter is by necessity the best
tipper in the world. He has to split
hto tips at least five ways. The head
waiter gets hto, the captain has hto
hand out. and the ‘scrub’ waiter and
cook are next lu line.
"If the waiter keeps all the money
the captain will soon get wise to him.
and he will get no more ’live ones’
steered up to hto table. If the cook to
neglected the waller might get bis or
ders cold from the kitchen. If he
doesn't cross tbe palm of the head
waiter with silver once in awhile be
will be looking for another Job.
“Tbe popular Idea that all waiters
are rich is ‘all wrong/ The average
, waiter gets about sUof|Ba week, and
some of them get less. The man that
leaves a quarter in tbe tray to really
giving the waiter about fl cents.**—Chi
cago Tribune.
Letters and Postage Stamps.
“Strange Ideas some people have
•bout postage.” said tbe clerk who
opens tiie mall. “Yes. See this letter
here with three one-cent stamps on It
aud stamped 1 cent due? That’s a case
In point. The writer of that letter
thought that perhaps it weighed a lit
tle over an ounce, a little more than
would go for 2 cents, and so he put on
a little more postage— 1 cent more—
which he thought would cover it. when
the fact to that it required an addi
tional two cept stamp. Of course you
know that letter postage to not frac
tional. bnt that it goes in multiples of
twa If a letter welgbs ever so little
over an ounce It requires an additional
two cent stamp. But not everybody
seems to know this, and so we some
times get letters like this one with a
HttTe more postage for a little more
weight”—New York Bun.
Jenkins' Car.
There was a war known as “the war
of Jenkins* ear.” It came about in the
following. way: In the year 1731 an
English merchant vessel was boarded
by a Spanish guardsbip. and the cap
tain. one Robert Jenkins, was most
cruelly used, one of bis ears being torn
off in the scrimmage. Obtaining no re
dress by appealing'to hto government
he appeared before parliament in 1738,
when the convention of the Pardo waa
so excitedly discussed that war fol
lowed. Jenkins' story was verified by
the admiralty records so recently as
1810.—Exchange.
Dtflnitfin of an Ohm.
An obm. as defined by tbe Interna
tional congress on electrical nnlts and
standards. Is tbe resistance offered to
tbe passage of an electric current by a
column of mercury of uniform cross
section having a mass of 223.0248
grains and a height of 41.8503 inches
at the temperature of melting Ice.
In the bureau of*standards at Wash
ington are four standard ohms so per
fectly made and kept that when tested
recently their average deviation from
their mean value was less than .00001
i ohm.
Music and Dancing.
It does not follow that In order to
write successful dance music a person
1 mast be an expert dancer. U to said
i that, though Johann Strauss and hto
family wrote dance music for three
ar four generations, not one of them
rould dance a step.
Musical.
When a person learns to pronounce
Wagner aa “Yogner” and Chopin aa
“Sho-pang” and cello aa “cbello” he
feels that be thoroughly understands
the classics of music.—Macon News.
Man and Trouble.
Only two kinds of people In the
«rorld. tbe man whose troubles are big
ger than be and tbe man who to bigger
than its troubles.—Milwaukee Journal.
MANSFIELD AS AN ACTOR.
His Genius Enabled Him «o Turn Bad
Parts Into Good On os.
We were to open a new theater iu
Puuton street which was not yeady. ao
we were transferred to the Royalty.
Mans field was a young man then,
about twenty-four. I should tay. He
waa practically unknown. He soon
began to shiue ut rehearsal. His part
was that of au old behu. .!. G. Taylor
waa to play u certain waiter. Tbe play
was au adaptation from the Freuch.
Furnie waa the adapter, with no pride
of authorship, ao he allowed Mansfield
a good deal of liberty In the way of in
ter|iolation and business. Day by das*
tbe part of tbe old beau was built up!
especially In Taylor's stench, until
Mansfield's part assumed the pro|*or
tlons of a leading character and Tay
lor’s part, which was the principal
comedy part of the piny, faded away
Into the backgroun-l. We all began to
take uotlce of Mansfield and to per
ccive that hto character was goiug to
be tbe part of the play.
One day Taylor rebelled. He told
Farnle aud Alexander Henderson, the
manager of the theater, that he waa
the leading comedian of tbe company
and that Mansfield's character had
now become the moat Important per
sonage In the combdy. He protested
violently. Farule waa In a dilemma.
Mansfield's business and additions
were so clever and so valuable that lie
deserved the prominence accorded to
him Taylor was an Important actor
and could not be dispensed with.
Mansfield came forward. "Would
Mr. Taylor like my part?" be said.
Taylor felt that aa the principal
comedian, the best part belonged, prop
erly to him. He ought to have Mans
field's part.
Mansfield handed it to him. “By all
means.” said be. "Here It Is.” and be
handed over the mauuscript covered
with Interpolations, corrections and
business.
We resumed our rehearsals.
“You will allow me.” said Mansfield
to Farnle—“you will allow me the
same privilege with this new part you
were ao generous as to accord me with
the other? Mr. Taylor baa tbe advan
tage of my suggestions on the other
character: you will permit me to do my
best with this?"
"By all means." said Farnle. and to
work we weut again.
Mansfield built up again. Day by
day. little by little, bla new part ab
sorbed scene after scene. —E. H. Soth
ern in Scribner's.
Made a Costly Mistake.
A big commercial house in tbe mid
dle west raised tbe salary of one of Its
officers to $40,000 a year.
The officer waa greatly pleased.
“Now my ambition to satisfied.” he
said.
Within two years the concern had
found a way to dispense with this of
ficer's services. It was done cleverly
aud smoothly. The man never suspect
ed the real reasou why he waa released.
The head of the concern bad over
heard hto remark. "We want uo men
in this business whose ambition to sat
isfied.” be said. “When a man to satis
fied. wbeu he ceases to plan and fight
for the future, we begin to lose money
on him.”—Woman’s Home Companion.
Why She Mad# No Outery.
“You say." said the lawyer, “you
heard this man break Into your bouse
In tbe dead of night, and yet you made
uo effort to call for help.”
"That is so.” •
"Were you too frightened to call
out?”
"No. I was uot disturbed a particle.
He bumped into tbe rocker of a chair
and swore, so I thought It was my hus
band."— Detroit Free Press.
Tha Cheerful Face.
Do not be grumpy Id your own home.
Some folks save all their smllee for
company or special occasions. It to far
more necessary to happiness to be
cheerful in your own home and with
your own family. If the home to hap
py one can bear rudeness met else
where. If the home is happy tbe hap
piness will radiate among neighbors
aud friends.—Milwaukee Journal.
Electricity’s Friends and Foes.
Ex|>eriments have shown that tbe
beat conductors or lightning, placed lu
tbe order of conductivity, are metals,
gas coke, graphite, solutions of salts,
acids and water.
The best nonconductors, ending with
tbe moat |»erfect Insulation, are India
rubber, gutta pereba. dry air and gases,
wool, ebonite, silk, glass, wax. sul
phur. resins and paraffin.
Renewing Rubber.
Rubber that bas lost its elasticity
may be rejuvenated, according to the
Journal de riiannacle et de Chimle.
by Immersing it for five minutes iu a
bath of glycerin mixed with twenty
five times its volume of distilled water
and heated to 70 degrees C. and then
drying It with filter pa.ier.
Toe Polite.
Little Boy—That lady that talked to
me In tbe park gave me some candy.
Mother—l hope you were polite. Little
Boy—Yes. ma. I was. Mother—Wbat
did you say? Little Boy—l said I
wished pa bad met her before be got
acquainted with you.—Chicago Herald.
Net Facially.
“How do you preserve the paint so
wonderfully T’
“I put many coats of varnish over
It.” explained tbe artist- “But." be
added hastily. ”1 hardly tLiuk that
would work In your case, dear lady/*—
Ixmtovllle Courier Journal.
Time works wonders-and so would
most people if they were as tireless as
time.
MEXICAN REPUBLIC
It Owes Its Very Existence to the
Urited States.
A MONROE DOCTRINE VICTORY
At a Time When We Had Treublee ef
Our Own We Bald “Hands Off I” te
the Pewere of Europe That Tried te
Raise a Monarchy In America.
If It had not been for tbe United
States there would now be no republic
of Mexico. •
Like all the twenty republics south
of us, Mexico bas been uuder the pro
tection of tbe Monroe doctrin#. The
doctrine has l»een often questioned by
European powers, but only once has a \
serious attempt been made to violate
It. This was between 1801 and 1805,
when the United States was engaged
In internecine warfare that imperiled
its very existence. Just as soon as our
war broke out the warships of Eng
land, France and Spain set sail for
Mexico and took possession of Vera
Cruz. Secretary Seward notified the
three allied powers of our deep concern
and anxiety for the security and wel
fare of the Mexican republic and that
our fleet would be stationed in tbe gulf
of Mexico to look after our Interests.
England and Spain soon withdrew,
but it became evident that «Napoleon
111. Intended to overthrow tbe republic
of Mexico as he had the republic of
France. A fictitious empire waa forced
upon Mexico by French troops, and an
Austrian archduke, Maximilian, was
selected as tbe puppet sovereign. The
French invasion was directed
all the republics of the new world. It
was prophesied In I’arto that in ten
years every South American republic
would be converted Into a monarchy
and the United Btates into a dictator
ship.
The handa oi the American govern
ment were tied, but the voice of the
American i>eople could not be silenced.
In the midst of our own war, when
war with England seemed imminent
the house of representatives risked a
war with France by passing a vote of
109 to nothing that "It does not accord
with the policy of the United States
to acknowledge any monarchical gov
ernment erected upon the ruins of any
republican government in America un
der the auspices of any European
power.”
Nothing more could be done at the
time, but just as soon as our war was
over General Grant proposed to organ
ize an army of combined Union and
Confederate soldiers who would volun
teer to march to the City of Mexico
and expel the Austrian emperor. He
selected General Bchofield to enlist
troops for service on the republican
side of Mexico. The war department
gave General Schofield a leave of ab
sence for a year, with permtolon to go
beyond the limits of the United States
and to take with him any of hto staff
officers that he wanted. In the mean
time Grant sent Sheridan to the Rio
Grande with 50,000 troops, which were
distributed along the frontier, where
they threatened the French lines.
But fortunately force was not neces
sary. The show of force was sufficient
anti Schofield was sent to Paris to ne
gotiate • for the retirement of the
French troops Instead of into Mexico
to drive them out. The secretary of
state notified Napoleon in November,
18C3, that the United States “still re
garded the effort to establish perma
nently a foreign and imperial govern
ment In Mexico as dlsallowable and
impracticable.” As the emperor of the
French did not seem disposed to pay
any attention to this Mr. Seward set
a definite date for tbe withdrawal of
the French troops.
The Mexican republicans under Jua
rez had been keeping up n brave fight
for freedom, although Maximilian had
ordered nil of them shot whenever
caught, without trial or the possibility
of pardon. As soon as the United
States had compelled the withdrawal
of the French the .republicans were
able to overcome the Imperialists with
no official assistance from the United
States. Their victory was marred by
the unnecessary execution of the would
be emperor in spite of the Interposition
of Secretary Seward.
But the United States had to say
“Hands off!” to Austria as well as to
France. Itather than have an Austrian
archduke ignomlnlously dismounted
from the throne it was planned to ship
10.000 Austrian troops from Trieste to
Vera Cruz. But our minister at Vien
na. Mr. Motley, was told by Secretary
Seward that if Austria allowed a sin
gle soldier to embark for Mexico the
United States would break off rela
tions at once. The Austrian govern
ment saw the point and prohibited the
shipment of the troops enlisted Tor
Mexico.—New York Independent.
What It It That Wins.
A countrywoman remarked to her
ueighhor during a conversation on
their return from market. “How to It
Mary, that you have been married four
times and I’ve never been married at
all and I’m much handsomer than
you ?”
“Aye. to Ite sure." returned Mary,
“hot It ain’t handsomeness that does
It, Sarah. It’s the ‘come hither* la
your eye."
Worthy of Admiration.
Her Dad—So you want to marry my
daughter? I like your nerve. Suitor—
Well. sir. you ought to. I spent a
whole lot of time working It up.—Bos
ton Transcript
Industry keeps the body healthy, the
■rind clear, the heart whole and tha
purse full.—Simmons.

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