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The Frostburg spirit. (Frostburg, Md.) 1913-1915, September 11, 1913, Image 8

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn90057193/1913-09-11/ed-1/seq-8/

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One Fright Per Minute for Crowd
Watching Keeper.
Manicurists Tackle Lions and Tigers,
and the Nail Trimming Was Done
Without Mishap Until Big Caesar’s
Cage Was Reached.
Chicago.—lt is not at all an unpleas
ant sensation to walk into a manicure
shop, sit down opposite a pretty maid,
and let her dally with your fingertips
for a half hour or so. But to have
a rope lasso thrown about your stom
ach, be dragged thirty feet across a
cage, and then have about two inches
of each finger nail clipped off by a
pair of wire nippers—well, that's not
exactly an enjoyable toilette.
However, that is what happened to
two tigers and three lions at Lin
coln park the other day. The scene
was the new animal house at the park,
and Keeper Cy De Vry and seven as
sistants were in the role of manicur
The manicuring started shortly af
ter noon, Rajah, the big Bengal tiger,
having been selected as the first sub
ject. A stage was placed against the
outer part of the cage, and on this
Keeper De Vry took his place. In his
hands he held a long pole with a rope
loop at the end of it.
After all was in readiness Rajah
was driven from the outer to the inner
cage and the door was closed after
Getting into adjoining cages, two of
the assistants, John Scullion and John
Hegenmiller, shoved a couple of rub
ber covered poles in Rajah's face.
Whereupon Rajah murmured.
But while Rajah was engaged in
this, Keeper De Vry pushed the pole
with the rope loop on it into the cage.
< After fifteen minutes of strenuous ex
ertion, he finally managed to get the
loop over Rajah’s head and shoulders.
It then took the combined efforts of
the seven assistants to drag the tiger
to the edge of the cage.
Here Rajah was again permitted to
vent his regal disgust on fresh poles,
while Keeper De Vry trimmed the
tiger's claw's with the wire nippers.
It was a job which required the
Tackled the Tiger.
utmost caution, for Rajah attempted
to do some manicuring himself, Keep
er Ik Vry’s hand being his object.
The nail trimming was done with
out mishap, however, and the mani
cure party proceeded to the next cage,
occupied by Kitty, Rajah’s better half.
She far from conducted herself like
a lady of caste, while her husband
stood by and roared encouragement
to her in her efforts to make a ban
quet of the manicurists. In this she
tailed to succeed.
The party next tackled the lions,
King being the first victim. He was
disposed of in about half an hour.
Then followed Emma Eames, ouce. the
sweetest singer in all India llondom.
She was a creature of artistic tem
perament, and it required about an
hour to get her.
The reel trouble came when Caesar 1
was reached. Everyone present looked j
like a Brutus to him, but he didn’t ■
need a Mark Antony to get people to !
lend their ears. They held their fin
gers over 'em most of the time. And,
before the Roman emperor’s toilet
was completed, there was a deep gash
on Keeper De Vry’s right hand.
The cut from Caesar’s claw was
more than an inch long, and when
Keeper De Vry had jerked his hand
from the cage several persons gasped
in fright and started for the doors.
This started a general exodus along
the outskirits of the crowd, more than
200 men, women and children running
outside. A panic was prevented only
by the coolness of several police offi
"1 wouldn’t do it again today for
a thousand dollars,” said Keeper De
Vry, after it was all over and his
hand had been properly bandaged.
"It’s a necessary proceeding,
though. You see, there is no way that
a lion or tiger in captivity can keep
Its claws worn down, as happens when
they roam in the jungle. So we have
to clip them every once in a while.
But it’s a mighty tough job.”
Dog Rescues Child From Rat.
Wilkesbarre, Pa. —Attacked by a
big sewer rat, Helen Bond, four years
old, fled from play in front of her
home, pursued by the rodent. A fox
terrier went to the rescue and dog and
rat fought for ten minutes, the canine
being finally the victor.
Watching Bedbugs.
Philadelphia.—Ten bedbugs are un
der close observation by University
of Pennsylvania physicians to note
how soon they throw off bacilli of
leprosy with which they have been
Puppy in Role of Hero When His
Mistress Is Attacked by
a Tramp.
Canal Dover, O. —Rebekah Root is
the comely seventeen-year-old daugh
ter of Jonathan Root, a farmer whc
lives north of town. Her consianl
companion in her farm duties is a
young bull pup she calls Raleigh. The
other day she went early to the wood
land near the edge of her father’s
farm to pick blackberries. The ripest
and juciest picking was along a fence
skirting the roadway, and here she
bobbed in and out, sometimes in
sight, often concealed entirely by the
bushes. Raleigh was with her, ol
course, but as she seemed to his dog
mind to loiter, he amused himself by
He Could Not Be Shaken Off.
chasing birds and butterflies in the
undergrowth back of the fence.
While busily engaged in filling her
bucket with luscious black beauties,
she suddenly popped out in the road
way, where she was surprised at be
ing confronted by a man. He was
young, roughly dressed and of the
tramp species. Seeing she was alone
he accosted her roughly, asking w'hat
she had in her bucket. She pleasant
ly told him berries and offered him
some, but he grasped her in his arms
and began dragging her backward to
ward the bushes. She had just time
to scream “Raleigh” before his rude
hand closed over her mouth, but her
cry was enough.
The faithful pup, alive with instinct
of his kind, abandoned his merry
chase of winged playmates, and re
sponded almost instantly. As the dog
reached the open, and saw his mis
tress grappling with a hobo, he knew
just what to do. Leaping for the man’s
throat he all but landed, but the
tramp threw him off, at the same tim<
letting go his hold upon the girl
Then the flustered and disconcerted
young woman witnessed a pretty fight
With her berry bucket the fellow sue
cesssfully combatted his dogship foi
a time, but finally the dog’s teeth be
came set in the slack of the man’s
trousers, and he could not be shaker
off. The girl saved the situation by
helping her assailant to get free, anc
he ran as fast as he could while sh
held her faithful Raleigh and alter
nat.ely laughed and cried.
Huge Whale Tries to Wreck Vessel,
Then Chases It for Half
>a Mile.
Baltimore, Md. —To have their ves
sel lifted three feet out of the water
and to be later chased over half a
mile by an 80-foot whale was the ex
perience of Capt. L. M. Smith ana crew
of the seagoing tug Defiance, which
reached port the other day from the
Virginia capes.
Captain Smith says the incident oc
curred at one o’clock in the afternoon,
while the tug was cruising between
Cape Henry and False cape, off the
Virginia seacoast.
“I was lying in my berth at the time
and Mate Jack Reese was at the
wheel,” said Captain Smith, “when all
of a eudden the bow of the tug rose
in the air and dropped with a plunge
and a terrific roll. When I reached
the deck Mate Reese was trying to
steady the vessel, which was still roll
ing, an& when he recovered his voice,
said that he had ran over a whale.
"Standing in the pilot house, we
watched the whale, which turned
around and followed the tug for at
least half a mile, then headed toward
the beach as if fatally hurt. While
the whale was following the tug it
lifted about two-thirds of its body out
of the water. The fin, huge flukes and
almost the entire head were in plain
Shark Attacks Tug.
New York. —With absolutely noth
ing but a shark’s tail to back up his
story, Captain Lang of the Erie tug
Marian tells how a 250-pound shark
tackled the craft with its teeth, stuck
and was caught.
Alligator Scuttles Boat.
Lenox, Mass. —While Michael Ho
gan and Daniel Clifford were fishing
on Woods’ pond, their boat was scut
tled and both men thrown into the
water by an alligator, supposed to
have escaped from New Lenox.
Weds His Mother-in-Law.
Colusa, Cal.—Herbert McCormick
has secured a license to wed his mo
ther-in-law, Mrs. Lillie Mabel Smith.
His first wife, Mrs. Smith's daughter,
died a year ago. McCormick is twen
ty-nine years old and his mother-in
law bride is forty-four.
Lightning Kills Hogs.
Fond du Lac, Wis. —Forty hogs,
valued at S3OO, were killed by light
ning on the farm of Robert Meikle
iohn. All were under a tree.
Their Black Leader Had to Be
■ Work of “Breaking” Them Immediate
-1 ly Begun—A Few Have Proved Too
Vicious, But Most of Them Will Be
Serviceable to Ride.
, Stamford, Mont. —The last herd of
, wild horses knotvn to be at large in
! Fergus county have been rounded up.
Riders for the "TJ. S.” and “2” outfit,
accompanied by State Stock Inspector
Kennon, succeeding in subduing the
band that has ranged in the lower Ju
dith river breaks for ten or twelve
years. The band consisted, all told, of
about fifty head, but only sixteen of
that number could be classified as
genuine wild horees.
The horses are practically all of
thoroughbred origin, being the off
spring of Hambletonian and Morgan
mares left on the range about twelve
years ago by a certain roundup. While
inbreeding had left its mark, the ani
mals were splendid specimens of their
type. Every summer attempts have
been made to round them up by am
bitious horse hunters, the long chases
and the constantly increasing vigilance
and timidity of the band tending to
keep them hardy and in running trim.
When finally captured the horses
proved to be smaller than supposed,
but every one was reduced to racing
flesh, and in the chase none of the
cow ponies could match them in speed.
The capture was effected by run
ning the band off its feet, this being
done by relays of cow ponies. After
the run had been arranged and the
point of approach determined upon,
the chase was commenced, and some
idea as to the desperation with which
the band attempted to evade capture
may be gathered from the fact that a
1 distance of 50 miles was traversed in
exactly three hours. A few of the less
hardy animals dropped out, but not
until they were exhausted.
The ground over which the chase
was made consisted of the breaks and
bad lands incident to the merging of
Arrow and Flat creeks at the point
where they enter the Missouri river,
and with the precarious footing thus af-
The Chase Was Commenced.
| forded many falls by the riders result
ed. Throughout the entire distance
the band followed a practice of racing
from one hilltop to another, evidently
endeavoring to secure an advantageous
viewpoint. Always in the lead was a
black stallion, and it is a matter of re
. gret that he did not survive the chase.
L He became entangled In a wire fence
and had to be shot.
, Although the band has been running
( over ten years, few if any of the ani
, mals were over seven years of age, the
explanation being that the older ones
were killed in the hunts of previous
years. One taken bore two big scars
’ from bullet wounds.
The chase was brought to a close at
! a corral!, into which all of the horses
were driven and roped. Ten seasoned
! riders were employed in the hunt. Sev
! eral of the cow ponies were made prac
' tically worthless from overexertion in
! the run.
! Immediately after the corralling had’
1 been accomplished the task of £reak
’ ing the wild horses was begun. While
a few proved too vicious to be con
• quered entirely, the majority will make
serviceable riding stock.
! ’
[ Pennsylvania Senator's Pet Dies After
. Eating Record of Investigating
Committee Proceedings.
, Wilkesbarre, Pa. —Senator Sterling
R. Gatlin several months ago received
a goat from his friend, Dr. C. F.
Church. The senator, who is a lover
of animals, took the goat to his home
’ and made a pet of it. The other day
l Mr. 'Catlin was called away from his
’ stock room to answer the telephone.
I and when he returned, he found the
goat had devoured a lot of valuable
papers which were being kept on re
cord. In the lot were the Philadel
phia proceedings of the senatorial in
vestigating committee, of which Sen
? ator Catlin was the chairman.
The Luzerne county lawmaker was
5 much put out, but he did not get an
-5 gry with the goat, which showed
signs of sickness. Instead, he sent
for a veterinary doctor, but before
the latter arrived the goat died. Mr
s Catlin thinks the animal was poi
' soned by ink on the paper.
> Lightning’s Freak.
Norristown, Pa. —While Thomas
' Nevins, a young man of Conshocen
was bathing in the river he was struck
by lightning and partially stunned.
The electric fluid, however, melted a
, silver wire which had been placed in
- his knee cap following an injury some
- time ago. Now the operation will have
be repeated and the wire replaced.
Architecture in Danzig Is of the
Middle Ages.
West Prussian Town Is a Perfect
Architectural Type of Ancient
Period and Its Newest Buildings
Conform to This Character.
Berlin. —Danzig, West Prussia, is the
perfect architectural type of a me
dieval city, showing a historic integrity
with which the stormy fates of many
centuries have dealt most kindly. Even
its newest buildings are made to con
form to this character so as not to dis
turb the impression of unity. One feels
the pride which these energetic and
prosperous burghers of the thirteenth
and fourteenth century had in all the
appointments and arrangements of
their famous town.
We hear-of it first in 997, when a
jjplf? jpkjjliji n §p| jji I?
Medieval Architecture.
Bohemian archbishop sailed from here
to preach to the heathen Prussians
farther east, a long time before the
more direct evangelistic methods of
the Teutonic order were applied. Its
political allegiance was often shifted,
and one feels sure that no merely ideal
considerations of loyalty were ever al
lowed to stand in the way of the inter
ests of its trade.
After the rise of the Teutonic order
Danzig became a part of its great ter
iltory, though reserving a large share
of self-government; it was at the same
time an independent member of the
powerful Hansa league—that supreme
example of civic and commercial pow
er. It joined its sister cities of the
league very effectively in fighting for
eign nations and pirates against its
commerce. When it tired of subjec
tion to the waning Teutonic order, it
entered into a sort of protectorate un
der the kings of Poland, who annexed
j it in 1569. Only as late as 1793 was it
I taken into ip is now the
j capital of the west Prussian region.
The town is very compact and prac
! tical in its plan, making an almost per
fect oval fretted by many waterways,
so as to have distinctly Venetian fea
tures. It reaches to the Vistula and is
traversed by several branches of the
River Motilau, while the little stream
Radaune makes a useful canal in a
long half circle through the city. One
large island is given up entirely to
grain elevators, affectionately named
‘‘Vesta,” “The Red One” and so on.
Opposite this island is the swarming
’Long bridge”—not a bridge at, all, but
a dock, where freights are landed,
and from which the smartest of steam
ers are leaving at all hours for adja
cent points on the Baltic, particularly
for the popular bathing beaches of
Zoppot and Hela. In the moving
panorama of this water front one gets
the best epitome of the life of the city.
All around its edge, Danzig is a
citadel rather than a town. Mountain
ous grass covered modern forts rise
on the west, and on the east the oval
is continuously fringed by radiating
bastions, completely bordered by deep
double moats filled from the waters of
the Mottlau. Each of these bastions
has its own personal name—“the
brown horse,” "the unicorn,” “Ger
trude,” “the rabbit,” “jumpout.”
Queer Freaks of Formation Noted by
a Forester In the State of
Olympia, Wash. —State Forester E.
W. Ferris, who has just returned from
Skamanta county, reports peculiar
geologic changes in the country
around Stevenson.
“In this piece of state land alternate
risings and depressions have made the
trees all crisscross until they look
like they were trying to do a split,”
said the forester. “But in the country
in the vicinity there are even more
peculiar conditions.
“In one case a watercourse has been
raised suddenly so that one end of the
stream bed was left twenty feet in the
air In another a piece of a mountain,
trees and all, apparently has dropped
flat into the ground leaving a bare
cliff where there was a gradual slope.
There are deep cracks appearing in
the bedrock and in some cases of
these depressions boulders and trees
are split right through the middle, the
two parts being feet apart.
“A Mr. Bowles connected his house
with a water tank and in two years'
the house and tank “hunched” togeth
er so that it was necessary, three
times, to remove a length of pipe. J.
W. Shaw of Vancouver told me he
owned a lake in the neighborhood and
that on driving out to it one day he
scarcely recognized it because a big
island had appeared in the center.
Meantime an altogether new lake had
appeared a few miles aw r ay where
there never had been water before.”
The changes noticed have all oc
curred within the last two years.
As a Man Eats, So Is He.
Paris. —Elie Dautrin, writing in Fi
garo, warns French young women to
watch their young men eat, warning
them that this is the best test of the
male character. I
For Sixteen Years. Restored
To Health by Lydia E. Pink
ham’s Vegetable
Moretown. Vermont.— “l was trou
bled with pains and irregularities for
sixteen years, and
t was thin, weak and
i|j •Jg||PSssS|S| nervous. When I
Wf would lie down it
! Ty would seem as if 1
? was going right
\ -= /•'I • down out of sight
into some dark hole,
and the window cur
' ta ’ ns had faces that
\ vw would peek out at
/ '\\ \V me, and when I was
■— out of doors it would
seem as if something was going to hap
pen. My blood was poor, my circula
tion was so bad I would be like a dead
person at times. I had female weak
ness badly, my abdomen was sore and I
had awful pains.
“I took Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegeta
ble Compound and used the Sanative
Wash and they certainly did wonders
for me. My troubles disappeared and I
am able to work hard every day. ” —Mrs.
W. F. Sawyer, River View Farm, More
town, Vermont.
Another Case.
Gifford, lowa.—“l was troubled with
female weakness, also with displace
ment. I had very severe and steady
headache, also pain in back arid wa3
very thin and tired all the time. I com
menced taking Lydia E. Pinkham’s
Vegetable Compound and I am cured of
these troubles. I cannot praise your
medicine too highly.”— Mrs. Ina Mill*
Slagle, Gifford, lowa.
STOP that\W
Pain in theSide\SrJjߧ. N
Kill, the Pain before it kills yon.
Backaches, “stitches” in the
side, “kidney colds,” scalding It \ fITT
duringurination—al' ..respeedily
and permanently relieved by vC.7
BSip>| | A Famous Backache
This sterling medicine has proved its
worth during 30 years of actual use. Should
be in every home. Guaranteed beneficial or
money refunded. Relieves pain almost
instantly. Sold direct by maker to avoid
\ JPeL substitution and to protect consumers. No
harmful or habit-forming drugs. A reliable
■w*u time-tried remedy for old or young. Snt
prepaid on receipt of price—$1. 00 per bottle.
Write for information, free on request.
Ipa k Wells Remedy Co., Baltimore aid,
Bh. Sole Proprietor and Distributor
farm, 100 a. in Amherst Co., Va.; 50 a. cult.,
all tillable, 100 bearing fruit trees, house,
barn, outbldgs., etc. Reasonable price and
terms. E. A. Marshall, Madison Heights, Va.
W. N. U., BALTIMORE, NO. 37-1913.
Its Origin.
“I wonder who originated the ex
pression, ‘Here’s a coil?’ ”
“I guess Adam did, when he saw
Eve talking to the snake!”
Refuge in Confusion.
“I suppose that by this time your
constituents fully understand your po-'
sition ?”
“No,” replied Senator Sorghum, “but
I think I have explained it at suffi
cient length to prevent them from
making any further attempts to com
prehend it.” —Washington Star.
Political Cosmetics.
“Great Scott, Jonesey,” said Wilkins,
“that’s a hefty bundle of papers you’ve
got there! All campaign literature, I
"Yes,” said Jonesey, “It’s a bundle
of political cosmetics for my wife.”
“Political cosmetics?” cried Wilkins.
“Yep,” said Jonesey. “She’s in doubt
as to her political complexion, and
this stuff will help her to make up
her mind.” —Judge.
It takes about a week for a girl’s left
arili to get used to carrying an en
gagement ring.
Hard luck is the best pavement
you can lay for luck to get to your
About the best thing that can hap
pen to some men is to have their
wives carry the family pocketbook.
It’s tough to be broke right after
a vacation but it’s tougher stiil to be
broke just before.
And here we are at the eighteenth
hole, as the golfers say.—Detroit Free
It is better to profit by your own
strength than by the weakness of
His Reason.
“Don’t take notice of the cook,
“I have to. She’s iust given it.”
Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces inftamma
tlon,allays pain,cures wind colic,2sc a bottle.Aar
Nothing to Retail.
De Garry—Won’t you give me a
kiss —just one?
Madge—Oh, pshaw! I like a man
■ who makes love on a large scale. —
‘ Judge.
i Use Roman Eye Balsam for scaldingr sen
r sation in eyes and inflammation of eyes or
. eyelids. Adv.
' Receipt.
; Miss Summit—l must answer his let
; ter and I want to write something that
doesn’t mean anything.
. Miss Palisade —Why don’t you tell
; him you love him? —Puck.
t Acid Stomach, heartburn and nausea
. quickly disappear with the use of Wright’s
. Indian Vegetable Pills. Send for trial
- box to 372 Pearl St., New York. Adv.
Strictly Fireproof.
! Mrs. Cohenstein (at shore hotel)
Oh, Isaac! Subbose dis hotel should
take fire!
| Mr. Cohenstein —Imbossible, Rach
el! Dey’re making money.—Puck.
Try Hicks’ CAPUDINE. It’s liquid pleas
. ant to take—effects immediate—flood to prevent
Sick Headaches and Nervous Headaches also.
Your money back if not satisfied. 10c., 25c. and
50c. at medicine stores. Adv.
i Perhaps So.
“He’s a queer man.”
“How so?”
“Whenever the movies show the
fashions of the day he takes them in.”
“Perhaps he likes to see what the
ladies are not wearing these days.”
and all Malarious indications removed
by Elixir Babelr, that well known rem
edy for all such diseases.
“I have taken up the three bottles of
your ‘Elixir Bnbek,’ and have not felt
so well and entirely free from pain In
limbs for five years.”—Mrs. E. Higgins,
Jacksonville. Fla.
Elixir Babek 50 cents, all druggists or
} by Parcels Post prepaid from Kloczew
skl & Co.. Washington, D. C.
“Do you want a job as a farm
“No,” replied Plodding Pete, “you
have been kind to me in the past and
I think too much of you to make you
an object of jealous hatred among all
your neighbors.”—Washington Eve
ning Star.
Important to Mothers
Examine carefully every bottle of
CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that it
In Use For Over 30 Years.
Children Cry for Fletcher’s Castoria
Home Campaign.
“Is your daughter going away this
“No; she has started a flirtation
.. --WAfe. ‘.h- v. ti s.u.d we. .thin!- hen
chances for getting married to him
t are very good.”
j Rocking-Chair Signs.
An observant Atchison woman says
she can tell from the way a woman
rocks on her front porch what condi
tion the house behind her is in. If she
sways back and forth with a floppy,
[ comfortable motion, plumping both
[ feet down in a relaxed sort of way,
then everything about the house is
, absolutely clean and ne’at. But if she
rocks in little nervous jerks, tapping
her feet down at short and irregular
- intervals, it signifies that there are
[ unmade beds behind her and stacks of
, unwashed dishes and dusty floors. —
Atchison Globe.
Cuckoo Reformation.
; A remarkable case of reformation
. on the part of two old cuckoos is re
ported by Col. A. M. Blake from his
t estate at Welwyn, Herts, England.
The colonel states that he found
two young cuckoos with the parent
- birds in faithful attendance. As is
• generally known, the regular habit of
the cuckoo is to lay its eggs in the
- nests of other birds, leaving the rear
; ing of their offspring to perfect
i This is said to be the third success
> sive year that cuckoos have brought
up their young at Welwyn.
Backache Warns You
Backache is one of Nature’s warnings
of kidney weakness. Kidney disease
j kills thousands every year.
Don’t neglect a bad back. If your back
is lame —if it hurts to stoop or lift —if
there is irregularity of the secretions—
suspect your kidneys. If you suffer head
aches, dizziness and are tired, nervous
and worn-out, you have further proof.
Use Doan’s Kidney Pills, a fine rem
edy for bad backs and weak kidneys.
A Maine Case
Mrs. J. H. Ben
, -o. nett, 59 Fountain
St., Gardiner, Me.,
Mmk nays: “I was in
Qtnr'n ” bed four months
V I with kidney trou
ble. My back felt
/ ({j f \ as though it was
broken. My body
\ bloated and I
' could hardly 3ee.
Five doctors failed
IJ t 0 belp me. When
ri l I had given up
/Ul / hope, I began tak
f/(/\\ Doan’s Kidney
|jr I \ \ Pills. I was cured
and now I weigh
/1 much more and
1 am strong and
Get Doan's at Any Store, 50c a Box j
Make the Liver
Do its Duty
Nine times in ten when the liver Is
right the stomach and bowels are right
gentlybutfirmly coni-, 4 ™
pel a lazy liver to
do its duty. i. r *
Cures Con-JSMmW fl TTLE
atipation, In- ij IV E R
digestion, JgjPatS.
and Distress After Eating.
Genuine must bear Signature
CThe U. S. Government buys Ithaca Guns for Nry
Officers—Uncle Sam always buys the best. <LLocks simple,
hammer one piece, coil main spring guaranteed forever. C.Cornell
University timed our lock. <(, Hammer falls in xW of a second
will increase your score. C. Beautiful catalogue FREE— describes
18 grades sl/75 up. Five bores —28, 20, 16, 12 and 10. <C.Send
us this adv. with ISc. and get beautiful hanger
regular price 25c.
Ever notice how much fuss men
make about their honor—on the stage?
“Your office doesn’t seem to be do
ing a great deal of work."
“No; I’m trying to be as quiet and
obscure as possible so that nobody
will ask me to resign.”—Washington
Too Bad.
The Dentist —Let me see! I’ll have
to treat four teeth —eight teeth —
'xLshHeK .r-'Vith. -
Mr. Pildo —Hold on! Four teetifi
eight teeth, eighteen teeth! What do
you think I am —a comb? —London
Why He Loved Her.
“Yes, young man, I know you!
You’ve been in love with my daugh
ter ever since you discovered that she
was an heiress.”
“But, my dear sir, you wouldn’t have
me marry a poor girl, would you?
Why, I can’t even support myself.”—
Ignorant of His Own Language.
The Boston Americans were playing
the Nationals in the Bean City one aft
ernoon. Tris Speaker knocked out a
long fly that fell between right field
and center.
Danny Moeller, the speedy right
fielder of the Nationals, went after it,
crying out for the guidance of Milan
in center;
“I have it! I have it!”
As soon as Moeller had caught the
fly, a disgusted Boston fan remarked;
“That guy don’t even know his own
language. What he should have said
is: T’ve got it!’ I suppose he’s some
gink that’s trying to make out he’s
been to college.”
As a matter of fact Moeller not only
went to college, but graduated.—Pop
ular Magazine.

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