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| Published Weekly | , *XT |Mi nnesot & gt&le J Vol. XVIII.—No. 35 Clk Professor’s experiment. J His Endeavor to Improve Upon J J Nature, and Results. PROFESSOR Voorhek had de cided to spend his vacation this Bummer on some quiet, peaceful farm, far from the bustle and noise of railroads and cities. During his former vacations he had generally gone to a seaside resort, or spent his time plodding along some lake or river with a fly-rod in search of salmon and trout, and had felt morei fatigued at the end than at the beginning of the vacation. This time, however, he had decided to make up for lost time by indulging in absolute rest. □No more poring over dry old; volumes or dab bling in distasteful sciences for a while. He would abandon himselfifentirely to the comfort and ease that his wood land retreat should afford. He told his colleagues how he should enjoy himself. “When you are sweat ing and wrinkling ;your sage brows over some dry, ancient and musty vol ume,” said he, “think of me reclining at ease, book in hand, underjthe spread ing branches of a majestic oak, or lounging in sweet abandon by the crystal waters of the murmuring brook, or strolling leisurely through the pri meval forests, communing undisturbed with Nature in its virgin grandeur. And at the midday hour, when you are stuffing yourselves with horrid in digestibles, imagine me sitting in the cooling -shade of the hemlock tree, with the daintest of delicacies,—fresh from the pantry and dairy—spread out before me; and a thousand song birds for an orchestra to furnish the festal music of my noontide repast.” This, and more, he told them. After much consulting of maps and guides he had finally selected an ideal spot in the state of Minnesota. Lt was a veritable forest home. The neat little farmhouse was situated on the edge of a clearing in the pine woods and facing a tiny lake —clear as a mirror— on which a flock of geese and ducks played all day long. Chickens and turkeys strutted about the clearing and made the forests echo with their familiar sounds. Millions of feathery songsters, of all voices and colors, in habited the surrounding woods. Tied to a little pier on the lake was a dimin utive birch bark canoe, that floated gently to and fro on the placid waters. On every side was life, peace and happiness. Over by the barn, sitting on a pine stump, smoking, whittling and talking confidently with “Dewey,” the dog, who seemed to listen with the elosest attention, was Mr. Bright, the farmer. He was a man of about thirty years of age, with a handsome, open face and a broad pleasant smile—one of those men whom you like on sight. On the other side of the barn —in the shade—stretched out at full length on the grass and humming “Ma gal’s a high bo’n lady,”for the especial amuse ment of “Trixy,” the cat, sitting on the roof of the dog-house, washing her face cat-fashion—was “Jimmy,” the hired man. Over m the kitchen, the windows of which were wide open washing dishes and mingling the rat tle of the milk-pans with her joyous song, was Mrs. Bright, the farmer’s wife. Fun and good nature was visi ble in her every move. It was the noon hour. Suddenly a hen screamed, the geese and ducks quacked loudly; Dewey barked; and Trixy from pity, jumped down on Jimmy’s back and bristled up. •She did not stay there long, however, for the hired man jumped up. So did Mr. Bright. He put his knife in his pocket and knocked out his pipe on the edge of the stump. Mrs. Bright stopped in her song and work and looked out through a window. They all looked down the road leading up to the clearing and saw the cause of all the disturbance. It was our pro fessor. In his hand he carried a STILLWATER, MINNESOTA, THURSDAY, MARCH 16, 1905. walking stick. From his shoulder, suspended by a broad strap was a camera. He wore a light checkered suit, tanned shoes, white gaiters and a broad Panama straw hat. He was smiling all over with satisfaction, and gazed to right and left with keen de light. “How’d do, gentlemen, how’d do,” he cried, effusively. “Mr. Bright I presume?” “Yes. Howdy you do professor,” said Mr. Bright. “Hope you’ll like it I here ?” “Like it!” he cried, inhaling a deep draught of the perfume-laden air. “Why, my dear sir, lam already in love with it; how can I help it? Such a sylvan retreat, such a bit ot Fairyland, such a Paradise as this is,” he said, spreading out his arms in emphasis of his praise. He was duly introduced to Mrs. Bright, to Jimmy, to Dewey, the dog, and to Trixy, the cat. “Jimmy and I have had our dinners,” said Mr. Bright; “but I dare say you haven’t had your’s yet. Come right in and Grace’ll soon fix you up a lunch.” The professor was all over the place on the first afternoon. He paddled around the lake in the canoe, and made little detours into the woods. His spirits were high. He smiled with affection on the turkeys, chickens, geese and ducks; and he was even l hoard sinicina snatches of old college | songs as he frisked around with Dewey and played with Trixy. That night he slept as he hadn’t slept since he was a boy, and arose the next morning in excellent spirits. He sat down to breakfast with a better appetite than he had enjoyed for twen- 1 ty years. And such a breakfast! 1 There were soft boiled eggs; hot milk 8 waffles; cream rolls; thick sweet cream; fresh golden butter; strawberries with i sugar and cream; and coffee, rich in ] aroma and flavor. He had dispatched \ one egg and reached tor another with \ a sigh of satisfaction. But ah! no j sooner had his knife pierced the shell , than whew!—But let us pass this an- < noying scene. The offensive egg of an , ancient lay was quickly removed by ( Mrs. Bright. , “Bad, ehV” said Mr. Bright. “That’s too bad. Don’t see how it happened; Grace is always so careful about pick- ; ing the eggs. But mishaps like that will happen sometimes. We can’t see through them you know; they may look ever so nice on the outside and be just full of cussedness for all that.” “True,” said the professor, whose ap petite had vanished when he opened the vile ovo—“true, we can’t see through them.” He became very thoughtful after that, and was seen to observe“ Speckle,” one of Mrs. Bright’s pet hens that al ways lingered around the kitchen door waiting for crumbs to be thrown out by the housewife’s generous hand. In the course of the forenoon he dissected a frog and explained some of the phenomena of its anatomy to Jimmy, who listened respectfully to his learned discussion. In the after noon he took to following the chickens about the clearing, watching their ac tions very closely. Speckle resented his approaches and ruffled up several times. The professor seemed absorbed in some deep study, and except the 1 hens, he took no interest in things about him. 1 This lasted a couple of days. Then . he seemed to wake up, as it were, and , sent Jimmy hurrying to town with a l dispatch to be wired to one of his 3 brother professors at the college which i read: “Prof. Winkle, Rock way College, t Send at once--” (Here followed a de -1 scription of certain chemicals, vessels j and instruments used in laboratory ) work) “Am hot on the scent of great f discovery. Will write more fully later. Voorhek.” i When the paraphernalia arrived he “IT IS METER TOO LATE TO MEMO.’* immediately shut himself up in his j room and began to “work.” He brewed j and stewed all day, stopped only long ! enough to snatch a hasty lunch at noon, and filled his room with the vil-1 est fumes and oders imaginable. Toward supper time he had succeeded ! in producing a little heap of whitish ! powder with which he seemed very much pleased. He carefully shut and locked the windows and doors of his room and descended to supper. During the supper he asked Mrs. Bright if he might use a couple of her hens to experiment on. He said that by feeding to them a certain powder of his invention they might be made to lay larger and different eggs. He laid great stress on the word “different.” She readily granted his request; and it was decided to capture a couple of the fowls the next morning. The profess or retired to his room and wrote a long letter to his old friend, Professor Winkle. “My dear friend,” ran the letter. “In my telegram I hinted to you that I was on the trail of a great discovery. That is true, and I am confident that I have now completed a preparation that will revolutionize the commercial world. Some chance words dropped by my host, Mr. Bright, the other morning set me to thinking, W'inkle, set me think ing, and you know what that means. “But let me come to the kernel of the matter at once. As you know, the eggs of birds are opaque. Well, I have dis covered a certain chemical that when partaken of by them will cause them to lay transparent eggs! You will no doubt be astonished, my dear Winkle; but it is really rjuito sir xypU. Tb» +gga of different species of birds vary in color. Why this difference? Now, the two tissues and layers of the egg-cav ity is essentially the same in all birds. What, then, causesthe difference? “There is only one explanation: What they eat. Acting on this hypothesis, theu, I set to work; and I am almost sure of success. “Think of what this means, my dear Winkle. No more bad eggs in the market. The hotel keeper need no longer be afraid of losing his boarders by serving them aged eggs. The house keeper will receive good eggs for good money. It means a saving to the country of millions of dollars, that is now lost in time spent in handling bad eggs. Then look at all the annoyance and trouble it will avert. “Besides, just think of an incubator full of eggs with transparent shells! The growth of the chicks may be ob served from day to day, and the bad ones culled out. The student in bi ology may be enabled to follow the development of the embryo of the chick without soiling his hands. W T hy, we can hardly realize as yet all the benefits the human race will derive from my discovery. Of course I might keep the secret of my preparation, screw prices up and become a million aire in no time, but I won’t. It can be manufactured very cheaply; ten cents worth will be enough to feed twenty chickens one year, or during the lay ing season. You may think that the farmers will not buy it; but they will or quit raising chickens. Transparent eggs wilt naturally |be preferred to the common ones. I can never be thankful enough that I came to Min nesota. Yours etc., Voorhek.” The next day Jimmy made a wire netting inclosure, and with the assist ance of Dewey, the| dog, Speckle was captured and placed within it. The professor mixed some powders together with flour andjwater and set it before the speckled fowl. But she positively refused to partake of it, and no amount of coaxing on the part of the professor could induce her to touch it. He exercised*all his known wiles to 4o pvail. She was kept a prisoner tili late in the afternoon when two younger and less arrogant birds were caught and put in her place. When the professor gave them his mixture they ate it greedily and he was elated beyond words. “Do you think that stuff will make them lay?” asked Mr. Bright. “Oh. yes; but not before morning,” said the professor. That night he could hardly sleep. He got up early the next morning, and went at once to the inclosure. The hens had both laid during the night laid down and died. Emeritus. the mathematician. He figured on the distance Of the stars up in the sky; He figured on our planet's age And when this earth will die; He figured on the railways And the trusts with patient skill— But he never found the errors In his monthly grocery bill. —Washington Star. The Foreign Ele= ments of Greater New York. Paper Read Before the Chautauqua Circle. THE manufacturing, export and general consumption of Ameri can goods have increased stead- ily for the last twenty-five years. What has been the cause of so rapid an increase ? What part has the different nationalities played in build ing up our home industries and for eign trade? We cannot give all the credit to the American-born citizeo- A. largortuwA is due to the spirit; of enterprise on the part of our German, Irish and Jewish immigrants, as well as conditions of our protective tariff, invention of la bor-saving machinery, cheap machine labor, national, state and municipal assistance. In a limited territory of forty-six 8 square miles, known as Greater New York, we have a population of six ® million people, largely made up of 8 Germans, Irish and Jews. It is an in- J teresting study to watch these three * principle foreign elements where they 6 are so closely allied in common welfare. * The Germans have succeeded in man- 1 ufacturiug, merchandise and machin- * ery, as tradesmen and builders. Their ( success can be attributed largely to * 4 their early school education, which 1 was compulsory, the parents being j liable to heavy fines for neglecting to send their children to school. At an 1 early age he is brought face to face ■ with the problem of earning a liveli- 1 hood. He must spend two or three 1 years in learning his chosen trade, af- 1 ter which time he must join the army or emigrate to a foreign country. Once in our country he soon loses his nationality and readily adapts him self to our ways, and in the majority of instances, maxes extraordinary progress. It is not an uncommon sight in Greater New York to witness a German foreman who can barely speak English, directing hundreds of American-born employees. To my mind there are three reasons for the slow advancement of the Amer ican boy. First, too much unionism, whereby the number of apprentices is limited; secondly, child labor depriving the child of school educa tion.- Thirdly, too much book knowledge—book knowledge without practical education avails a young man very little, especially when he has to brush up against the rough edges of the business world. Unionism today i is producing machine labor without ; the thorough knowledge of a trade, > and the result is that the machine i laborers mete out but a humble exist , ence. ; In Trenton, New Jersey, no less than > five thousand children under the age i of fourteen years, are employed. The i same evil exists in New York and i other large cities. The child learns i nothing practical and at the age of . eighteen he finds himself without a i trade and the responsibilities of a i livelihood upon his shoulders. Such a TeDua. j Si.oo per year, lnadranca m«. -j 81x jJoutjjg go cen t s condition of affairs only increases the ranks of common laborers. The German immigrants as a class have been very successful in manufac turing, building and as tradesmen. Their hardest competitor is the Jew, notwithstanding the fact that he has but a common education. He is cau tious and determined and has won a high place in the commercial field. In social life the Germans possess a na tional pride and unity. They all meet on a common level. There is no aris tocracy. In business life, however, they are jealous of the prosperity of each other, and this jealousy has saved them from becoming clanish and has given them a natural national charac ter. The Irish element in our eastern cities shows an entirely different char acter of advancement. As in England we find them to the front, politically speaking. They are natural-born political organizers or party control ers. They are systematic and practi cal. Their punctuality has given them a superiority over the other foreigners. In New York and Boston they hold the largest per cent of municipal and political offices. Eighty per cent of the police of New York and ninety per cent of the force of Boston are Irish. As contractors they are leading all the other nationalities. Nearly all the larger buildings in New York and Boston are put up by the Irish con tractors, who employ Italians to do the roughest work. The Italian immigrants have sur passed the Germans and Irish as stone anromis. They are leading all nation alities in brown stone, marble and granite work. In the fruit trade they control the market. They have suc ceeded where companies like Armour & Co. have failed. In this trade it requires a thorough knowledge of all fruits—a knowledge which seems a second nature to the Italians. The Jews, as a rule, are cautious, good-natured and possess common sense. They are hated by all nations. This hatred is based on envy, because they are successful even under re strained conditions. They have taken the leading place among the manu facturing classes of the world. They endeavor to please the people. No doubt the factor that has worked to the advancement of the Jew is the fact that he is taught to study men and business affairs rather than books. The Jews have been a wandering people for the last eighteen hundred years, yet today they practically con trol the money market of Europe and our own country. In proportion to numbers they stand at the head of our nation as the most progressive of all foreigners. In his early life he carries a pack and peddles from door to door. This is done that he might learn the practical side of life, to read character; and when he succeeds in learning this, he then settles down in his small way and usually prospers. Of the three nationalities mentioned we find that each have their particular calling in life in which they usually succeed, and all three classes have done much in advancing the manufac turing, export and general consump tion of American goods. H. R. the Uictory. npo do the task of life, and be not lost; " To mingle, yet dwell apart; To be by roughest seas now rudely tossed, Yet bate not jot of heart; To hold thy course among the heavenly stars, Yet dwell upon the earth; To stand behind Fate’s firm-laid prison bars, Yet win all Freedom’s worth.—S. H. Morse. | Ocean Depths. i , The ocean used to be considered l about as deep at its deepest as the i highest mountains are high. It has k now been proved to be half as deep i again—that is, 46,236 feet.—Ex..