Newspaper Page Text
THE SEDALIA WEEKLY BAZOO, TUESDAY, JUE 6, 1882. SEDALIA BAZOO ' TV t' r "8ettine P.. : 1. WEST 600DWIN. I J"' "J" 816 ..n given and the donors names appear, Jwhoarethej? most of them are be- nevers in me amne mission 01 ine BROWNSVILLE BITS. Daily, inclnding Sunday, per year........ 8 no Sunday edition, per year. "o 50 Weekly, 52 numbers, per y ear- x 00 tlly, delivered in the city , ier week- 15 XXWS DEALERS aVrularly supplied at 2 cents per copy. All subscriptions are payable in advance, and neootinued at the end of time paid for. HOW TO SESfD MONEY. Bemittances may be made br draft, money order ar registered letter, at our risk. Give postoriioe address in full, including state and couuty, and ddreM J. WEST GOODWIN, Sedalia4 Mo. WEEKLY BAZOO. SEDALIA, MO. TUESDAY, JUFE 6, 1882. Christ, in the reality of His religim and in the authority ot His words. They are not scoffers, atheists and in fidels. They are christians. And that is the record of all these charitable deeds. Permeating human hearts, as the shafts of golden light fall through the air, the spirit of Christ prompts the charity of the world and answers the appeal of the distressed in all lands. A FALSE CLAIM. Perhaps by the time these lines go to press, Circuit Attorney Harris, of St. Louis, will have passed away. Jt is sad to think of the cutting down of The devil is a versatile old genius, j such a man in the opening of a splen- He can more readily invent seeming- did career of usefulness and fame. y plausible arguments and reasons for Mr. Harris is a young man, but he the promotion and justice of his king- has made a record which is without dom. than anv other notentate. And. blot or blemish. He has shown him- j A 'I strange as it is, he invests his subjects self the fearless and able champion of with his magic power. law, the honest and unflinchihg ser in no one thing does this prince of vant of duly. No circuit attorney in darkness more glory than in the ac- St. Louis has so bravely lived up to complishment of some charitable deed, the obligations of office as has he, and Give him but an opportunity to assist no one of them has been feared by some unfortunate being and he speedi- the lawless class as "Little Jo Harris." ly does so, in a small way, however, It is a great loss to any state when and then hies to the street cornel's to such a man dies, but that loss is made tell each passer-by what he has done, greater when a citizen holding a posi In nine cases out of ten, the be- tiou which demands ability, honesty, stowal of charity by men "of the energy and high moral courage, is world, men who delight in crying suddenly stricken down, and the work down the churches ; who are always he has in hand is brought to a close picking flaws in the character of Mr. Harris was the terror of the law ome weak christian ; who declare the defying gamblers. He met them be bible to be a lie and God a caricature, fore the bar of justice in a bit arid. Christ a wretched impostor, is ter fight, and he came off more than done from sinister motives. conqueror. For that one victory he They give because they see in the Has secured lasting fame and the act a weapon they can use either as of- gratitude of every man who loves law iensive or defensive. They and the purity of morals. But the boast of their liberality and battle cost him his life and he went and sneeringly point to the christian from the arena to lie down in death, as a hypocritical money lover; a cold Peace to his ashes. Over his grave, and selfish Pharisee. They claim the if such there be this morning, we lay possession of the grace of genuine our tribute of admiration, and mingle charity and complacently make of it with other friends the tears we would the chariot in which they are to ride not check. to eternal rest and peace. The Bazoo Man Drops in on the Cyclone Town. Olympic hall will soon be itself again. A. N. Suter has returned from Xew Mexico. D. W. Maruaduke has returned from St. Louis. Granville McAdaw is home from Chi cago on a visit. Frank Forbes proposes starting a pho tograph gallery. Mr. Wm. Odell is back from a visit to his brother at Carrni, 111. J. C. Lamkin and Charles B. Forbes visited Marshall on Tuesday. The Herald "declines to believe" that Frank James is to be pardoned. Col. Havward and hissurveving partv are expected in a week or two. Dr. Thomas Bridges, of Kentucky, has en visiting his sister, Mrs. W. D. Rem- bert. Two of Mr. Owens' escaped deer have returned and two fawns since put in an appearance. Salt Pound township will vote on the loth of July on funding its bonds at a lower rate of interest. A young mule walked into the court room on Mondav, but failed to recognize any of his own species. George Rice, one of the cyclone suf ferers, has received a present of $41. 'Jo from friends at Knobnoster. C. M. Kelly manages to get around on crutches, and Perry Wilson now spends several hours each day in a chair. George W. Tuthill, jr, a chip of the old block, has gone toward lexas, in the interest of a St. Louis paper company. Information from Sacarro, Xew Mexi co, has been received that Robert Huston is in a mining camp, and lias tine prospects. Sweet Springs will open ou the loth and preparations are making for a grand time. The usual excursion trains are to commence running on Sunday. The people are longing for the time when the narrow gauge road will be widened from Lexington to Independence, and trains run through from Sedalia to Kansas Citv, via Brownsville. Mrs. Mattie Xacross, wife of Hudson Xacross, died near Huntingdale last Sun day, and on the same dav, in Clinton, George R. Snedaker, son of John Sneda ker. Xick Rogers, of Clinton, is back from Kansas City ; Dr. Salmon attended the Lexington Female college commencement ; Herbert Church is visiting at Homer, Mich. The Clinton people have subscribed $62 for a time ball and bell which are to be placed ou Haysler Bros, building, 3nd announce each day the arrival of 10 o'clock, according to the Washington observatory. At Profs. Rauten's and Brown's enter tainment in Calhoun, Monday night, the prize for the best looking lady was voted to Miss Kate Edmonson, and for the best looking man, a pair of baby stockings to Mr. John Dilley. Dr. Sam Milton will attend the Den tal association at Brownsville : X. H. Dun is at Eldorado Springs making brfck ; George M. Casey has gone to St. Louis to sell beeves from the Texas ranches belong ing to himself and others. The assessed valuation of property in the Clinton school district is $700,000. Thirteen teachers and one principal are employed at salaries ranging from $35 to $50, and the principal at $1,000 a year. The state fund amounts to $1,000. A forget! check for $245, purporting to be drawn by S. Blatt, was presented by a strange woman to the Henry County bank. The woman is supposed to be connected with a party representing themselves as horse traders, who were last heard of going toward Warsaw. FOOTLIGHT FLASHES. Items of Interest to Play-Goers Prom Everywhere. FLEA BITES. SMITH'S OPERA HOUSE, Sedalia, Mo. Geo. T. Brown A Co., Lessees. Seating capacity 800. DURLEY HALL. Applktox City-, Mo. J. W. arrant ley, Proprietor. Will sent 5)0. LAMAR OPERA HOUSE Lamas, Mo. Brown A Avery, Proprietors Full scenery. Seats 60U Avertisementsat the head of this column, not exceeding four lines, $" per annum. THE HUSTLER'S HAUL. He CHIPS FROM CLINTON Sets His Net in Lafayette County and Captures a Batch of Items. young man of The claim is a false one. As a class, the christian is the only true giver. He alone has built the colleges, hos pitals, asylums, and homes for the poor, the aged, the helpless and in firm. Without the spirit of the Christ, none of these things would be. They never were before He came, they are not where His teachings are unknown or unaccepted. We too often take mdvidual in- It is not inappropriate to the day stances of help or neglect as indispu- to reiterrate the statement that Seda table evidences of the truth of the lia needs a hotel, claim that the disbeliever in christi- THATACKIXG COUGH can be sirity is the generous man, andj that so quickly cured by Shiloh's Cure. We thediciple of its Founder is never guarantee K For sale by all druggists. it i i moved ny tnis noDie impulse. RICH HILL NUGGETS. Let but some poor, unfortunate What will be the outcome of the strikes in Chicago and other large cities, it is hard to say, just now. Already blood has been shed ; the blood of a prominent citizen of Illi nois, who was quietly sitting in a pas senger coach, little dreaming of the fate which awaited him. The strikers should shoot one another, if shoot they must. And Other Points in Henry County, Gathered for the Sunday Bazoo by a Chipper Chap. Rev. Dorsey will preach in Ladue to day. The bond compromis is being consider ed favorably. Some Windsor people are talking of establishing a college. The erection of a bridge on the Lees- ville road is being agitated. Mr. Barnes, of Ladue, is in Texas dis posing of sub mail contracts. Albert Speck has provided a patent banner for his Ladue store. Harry Kemp has the contract for a new school house at Colhoun. Robt. Hughes has executed twenty live Clinton dogs within two weeks. Elder Elliott closed a prosperous pro tracted meeting at Urich, last week. The Clinton high school commence ment exercises passed on successtully. Mr. William Gofoith has the contract for the Windsor school building addition. Mouse Hollard, a Clinton city prison er, escaped while cleaning a street crossing. Mr. Wyatt Walker, of Windsor, is recovering from a severe attack of paraly sis. Judge Foster P. Wright and Judge Waldo 1 Johnson were in Clinton on Monday. Mr. Albert Smith's horse, of Shawnee . . . rr , Mound, chases down spring chickens and 1 1 J 1 1 V - V'VI -ww Pfltc tlw.III. inn iiu Tiuiriiu'iwi hit I iiu nnruriano nr i i I i - I i i VM -- 5"1 uvgiWLv. wjj .iw xyui.ioi.iMUw jj I oeen esiaDiisiieu. a community, and helped by the sin ners, and what crowing, what sneer ing at religion, these latter give forth. How they boast and bluster ; with what impudence they claim the right aad title to all the liberality and noble charity in the land, and de nounce the cold selfishness of those who are so demented as to believe the superstitions of that silly book called the bible ! What can be more absurd and Tun founded than this claim. Not a tithe of the world's giving is theirs, not a mite in the sum total of the splendid record of deeds done in the name of sweet charity can they claim. While not robbing them of a single merit, it is unfair to them and to the grand spirit of the christian life, to laud with fulsome flattery these cheap, small and insignificant deeds. Where these men give a dollar, the Colorado on a move into their L. Hart is back from visit to his family. Payne & Bias will new brick on the J Oth. L. Lamkin & Co. haye taken posses oion of their new office. A large brick building is to be erected on the corner of Maple and Sixth. Mr. Fred James building has been sold to Laris Cain and Charles Helms. F. M. Wyatt is back from Butler, and Mr. Bird from Bourbon county, Kansas. Rev. Collins has returned from his temperance tour aud will organize a tem ple in Rich Hill. Building is booming. Nine business houses and some twenty residences are in course of erection. L. V. Covell and H. B. Bergun, of the Cornet band, are visiting Butler in the interest of the forthcoming Amphitheatre exhibition. Excursion trains for the amphitheatre exhibition at Rich Hill on the 7th of June, will be run from Nevada and Butler. The exhibition will be for the besifit of the Cornet band. Keith & Henry have dissolved part nership, the former purchasing the latter's John Perry, oi r ort bcott is one interest. of the new firm, which will be known as -i . . n Jtt . .1 1 I . disciples Ot unrist give tnousanas. Keith & Perry. Three mines will be un This finds confirmation in the history der their coutrole at Rich Hill and one in Cherokee county, Kansas. George R. Sweeney continues as mining superinten dent and J. S. Boardman &s manager of the merchantile business. Hopson of the present, and is recorded in ever lasting rememberance in the past. A few dollars given to. a poor girl, outraged and ruined by a fiendish father is no cause of boasting. Com- mon huraaoity prompts the help, and Liquid Bxtract of Beef and Tonic, common sympathy moves the hand to Invigorator m several cases'of c nmrnp- ' iiri x M ,v - tion and general debititv, and have found it open the purse. What if no chns- to act amirablv in su'ch caPe as a ulltritive tian gave to this girl ? The money food, tonic, and" stimulant." ( Take no other.) TrWh chmild haw crmiA to her sun- UI druggists. o r From Eminent Dr. H. B. Memphis, Tenn. "I have made used Golden' 8 Liebiff's port was spent by her beastly father over the saloon bars of the city. Who un should have succored her when came upon her ? The an- Elder Gray, of Springfield township, defies any other Baptist preacher to beat his tlax crop. Judge Gault's term thus far has re sulted in the impositions of fines amount ing to $1.529. Prof. Higgins is teaching singing classes in me ueep water ana uear LreeK neighborhoods. The East school won the blue ribbon for best siuging in the competitive exhi bition at Bronaugh. No quorum being present in the county court on Monday, Judge Allison adjourned it to June 26th. E. A. Gracey, esq., has been appointed one of the justices of the peace in Clinton, vice R. E. Lemis, resigned. A special venue of seventy-five has been ordered by Judge Gault in the Mc Kinsey trial, set for June 19th. Senator DeArmond was in Clinton on Monday, looking after his chances for the democratic nomination for congress. Tuesday the people of Ladue were greatly interested in the church trial of a member of theC hristian denomination. Prof. Lamkin, delegate from the Osage Presbytery, has returned from the Presbyterian assembly at Springfield, 111. The democrats will hold their town ship meeting June 26th, and their county convention to appoint delegates, July 1st. Dr. Y. G. Salmon has recently erected a new barn on his farm and constructed one and a half miles of board and wire fence. Senator J. H. Bradley and C. H. Morgan have been in Clinton looking after their respective congressional in terests. The Deer creek school is being tanght by Miss Smith, of Clinton ; the East school by Miss Bettie Hereford ; the Lewis school by Rob't Cameron. Early Monday morning two tramps stole into Mr. Avery Dal ton's kitchen, near j Cunningham ford, and helped themselves 5 to a very fine breakfast. Festival. There will be a strawberry festival and J Mr. R. M. Teller, of Clinton, is the concert by the Smiths, in costume of 1S32, owner of a black-and-tan pup born with at W. C. Weiler's, Third street, Thursday j both eyes open and with a mouth and nose evening, June 3. A cordial invitatiou to all strangely resembling those of a seal. Fd. Herr. a promising .nay view, is ueau. J. E. Tucker has returned from May view to Higginsville. The senior Ridgway has stocked his new pond at Aulvillo, with carp. Marcus McIIatton. of Mayview, re joices in the arrival of a tine son. A lively scene at a leading hotel in Lexington, is promised the public. Mr. Frank Tutt's vounsest son. Frank K., died on the 30th ult., aged three vears. Mr. H. P. Brackman's tine barn, near Concordia, was destroyed by fire the other dav. During the three weeks ending May 25, forty-five transfers of real estate were recorded. J. E. Cheatham furnished the nlans and estimates lor the new church at Hig ginsville. Dr. Henry Becker led Miss Laura Bracklein to the alter at Concordia, on the i o.i. r i 1 lOUl 11151. The German Lutherans of Higgins vine are ereciiug a cnurcn eaince WlllCil 13 to cost $S,U0O. The report is being again circulated that the narrow guage is to be changed into a standard gauge. Judge Waters is on his way to Hig ginsville to solicit subscriptions to the Odessa & Fort Scott road. Mr. James Belles, living near Odessa- has a mule colt which was born blind but is otherwise doing well. Lexington township will vote June 24 on the proposition to compromise the townsnip Donas at 40 cents. Mr. B. T. Wilev, of Lexington, lost his wife, after a few months of wedded happiness, on the 28th of May. The democratic primaries have been called for July 22. A democratic conven tion was held at Higginsville yesterday. Willie Summers, aged 13 years, son of Isaac Summers, of Lexington, dropped dead from heart disease in Holden, Jast Sat unlay. Maggie Brice, Nannie Gordon, Willie Catron, Samuel Hays and Willie Gratz, have just graduated from the Lexington high school. M. A. Hayden, who went west from Mayyiew for his health, has been brought back dead. His father died a short time previously in Kansas City. The German Lutherans of Napolean have sold their old church and contracted with Mr. Louis Redeke for a new church and parsonage to cost about $4,000. Medicated nails, warranted to kill the borers when driven into iruit trees, but which are said to deaden the trees, are be- ing som extensively to tne larmers. Mrs. Emison, living near Wellington, was severely injured on Tuesdav bv beinc tripped by the brake aud falling she was aiiguimg irom ner wagon. A correspondent at Page City, who nasjust been tbrongh Howard and Saline, reports that Governor Crittenden is warmly endorsed by the better class of citizens in those counties. Topsy Venn Is ill. Alice Dunning Linard is in England. Amy Lee is playing in New Orleans. Lotta sailed for the Old World yeaterday. Lawrence Barrett sails for England June 20th. William Ilarril haa jolnea Rheu, play 115 lead ing big. Agnes Herndon is playingieadingbain(.Mwith Roland Rel . Sara Jewett sailed for Europe on the steamship "Svythia" yebterday. Lillian Olcott will spend the summer at Green--mh1 Lake, in study. Manager.!. II. Havely will return to this coun try the latter part of August. E. M. Holland has been engaged for next season by the Madison iquare Co. at Albert Weber has presented the Boton Lodge of Elks with a. tina upright piano. Madame Stelka Gcrnter and ttardini have departed for Liverpool Ralph Delmore will join Lotta's Companv next season playing leading heavy husine-. SaBaaBaaaaiBaiaaLfi COME, LET US ALL SCRATCH. Patti says it is her ambition to "live quietly and sing for the poor." Exchange. A "poor" ing from Patti will never be listened to with any sort of patience. Milwaukee is discussing the proper length of a lover's evening call. Exchahge. If Milwaukee will leave the matter with us we will settle it to the satisfaction of half the girls in the country. Just let the lover get out of the hous before the breakfast bell ring. "Love me, love my dg;" is a Exchange. good adage. J. M. Ward is suffering from a paralytic stroke hi house in Philadelphia. husband, Dr. A Valuable Addition. Because it is beneficial to the scaln and adds to personal beauty by restoring color ana lustre to gray and laded hair, is whv Parker's Hair Balsam is such a popular dressing. Will not be Arrested. Yesterday afternoon, Marshall Shy re ceived the following telegram : "Kansas Citv. June 3. lTo Chief of Police : "Do you want A. J. Mc Williams? "R. W. Gillian, "Deputy Marshal." Chief Shy immediately hunted up Prosecuting Attorney G. C. Heard and presented the telegram. Mr. Heard thourht it would be better to answer in the nega tive, as the principal and, in fa"t, onlv witness of account, the girl, had gone from the city. Marshal Shy accordingly answered the telegram with a simple "no." It was learned, m connection with this matter, yesterday, that McWilliams had sent a certain woman to this citv, during tne past weeK, to procure the girl and take her to him that he might silence her. It was strongly hinted that the intention was to murder her if she was found and re turned to him. Wm. II. Power is at his home in Detroit Mich., busily arranging his plan? for the coming season. Louise Pome y has scored 3 great success as Pcrdita in "A Houter's Tale" at Sydney. N. S. Mrs. Loum Watsnn. late of Power's "Mv Genildine" Company sailed for Englaud recently. Rartley Campbell's Galley Slave wa produced in Berlin recently. The Berlin paper? apeak well of the play. Harry Wall has the American right of the pecta ular drama "Xight-bird" now running with .success in London. William Stall rd, the young star, made a big -trike last wee m Chicago, clearing $.5,u00 upon a speculation in wheats Miss Fanny Roeves is playing In Esmeralda. She takes the part of Mrs. Booth, that ladr bein very iil and uuable to lay. " AI Liiumnan has been engage I for lading busi ness with Minnie Maddery for the summer season He rejoins Robsn and Crane in the fall One of the most liberal contributors Ia tht Actors' Fund is John A. wtewn. He gave $500 last week. Otherartistsshould follow his example. Miss Clara Spence, a young ladv of much promise, and a former pupil of He man Vezin, has leen engaged by the Madison Square for three vears Wm. E. English manager of the Grand Opera House Indianapolis has been nominated for con gress. He has every prospect of taking a seat in the house. An Indian chief in Washington went to see the iucui vpvra winpanv. . v nitnev gave a particularly low tone and the chief said : Ugh! him heap dug out." Edouins Sparks Company will cIo?e their sea son in New York City. Alice Athertou will be a member of the company next season, all reports to the contrary notwithstanding. John A. Stevens will take out the Jollr Bache lors Opera Company next season and will augment the number by ten more people. They will open the new Opera House at Topeka, Kansas. John H. Havlin has arranged to nlav Minnfp Maddemat Hooleys, Chicago the week of "Julv Oth. Poggs Ferry has been altered and improved and is now running r-ery smoothly at the Park theatre. Miss Kate McKisatry a well-known amateur, has been engaged by the Madison Square Theatre for a term of live years. The lady will make her first appearance during the summer as Nora in tsraeraida. Maggie Mitchell closed a remarkably successful engagement last Saturday, and haa gone to her house at Long Branch, where she will take a much need ed reat. I er next season will begin September 4th, at Abbey 'a Park Theatre. John E. Owena says he is out of his element at the Madison Square Theatre. He is not permitted to swear, drink or smoke and he is even compelled to read tha ew Testament between acts, instead of a quiet game of cards, as is his usual wont. Fred Meader's new play "Yours Truly" is spoken of enthusiastically by all who have seen it. He has written three new plays recentlv, all of which have b en spoken of in "the highot terms. Fred's prospects are, upon the whole, booming. The first thing to be brought out at Booth'3 next season i3 Bartley Campbell's new play Siberia, which will be produced by the Kiraltys on a tre mendous scale employing no leas than one hundred people. Tha scenery will be something novel and eiegant. strange to say mere win be no ballet. Frederick Warde says Florence Elmore is tha rj 1 r . 1 - . . - r. a i . t . . . . lueaiuuei, miss rimore is ine aaugmer oi tx Senator Brown her real name being Ruby Brown, She is now visitsng Hon. Horatie Sevmourat Utia N. Y., he being an old friend of her fathers, proposes to star in the legitimate next season. On Coups recent visit to Kansas City with his Circus and MenngeIa he was accompanied by Mis Royal the high wire performer. She appeared for tno nrst time sinte ner tail irom the wire during aer onnuiom act ai vincennes, ma., inree weeKs ago where sne dislocated her hu. She did her act creditably, but the pain was so great that after her velocipede trip over the wire she could not control her feelings and burst into tears as she limped from the presence of the cheering multitude. tica She Snow for Posterity at Schell City. An amusing hit at Schell City occurred there on Friday. A certain leading mem ber of the Baptist church there, and chair man of the church building committee, was soliciting funds for the new Baptist church to be built at that place soon. He approached a gentleman ot that city and asked what he would give towards the good cause, expatiating at some length on the good which the church would be the means of bringing to the city, and winding up by referring to the weltare of the future generation, who would reap the benefit afforded by the church. The gentleman approached was a single man, and replied: "Well, but I am not and shall not be inter ested to any great extent in the future generations, as I have no children and do not expect to be the happy possessor of nv. The worthy solicitor was taken aback for a moment, then replied: "Well, if you never have any posterity in Schell City, it will be your own fault, and not the fault of the city." The remark was followed by a hearty and prolonged laugh among the bystanders. True Merit Always Wins. There is a constantly increasing demands for Brown's Iron Bitters. A druggist on Washington street reports the sale of 23 bottles the first month : 86 bottles in the second month, and 146 bottles the third month ; and not one complaint or failure to give entire satisfaction as the very best health and life-giving medicine in all the world. Buy your fruit jars and jellie tumblers at Holcomfrs chma store. Yes so it is, but when a young man up on Fifth street the other evening attempted to exemplify that, in the presence of his bst girl, h- ht not only a big piece from his pantaloons but from his epi dermis also. Gate posts should be set out firmlv. A great deal may hinge upon them as your girls" grow up. Exchange. True; and when the gate pot creaks every time a chaste kiss is taken, it is enough to make yourghi leave the country. A tru philosopher never argues. Exchange. No, he concludes at once that the man who wish es to argue i an unmitigated ass and preserve.- a holy silence. Can a hoy ave his father when he N eighteen years old ? Exchange. As far as mot father'.- are concerned it is not likely they will ohiect. eMeci:dlv if tluv h;v w,. - w r 1 m - - -. - aa.v 'Vw'l eating three Mjiiare meal per day rigbt along up t., that time. Necessity the mother of invention. Ex. It would'nt make any ditlerence if he were the mother-in-law, if she could only invent a plan by which a man could sit in a chair without the tidy coming ott'on hi hack. Pr. Pierce's "Golden Medical Discoverv" ha astonished the medical faculty. Exchange'. It. has astonished more than the medical fraterni ty: we know :i young lady in Sedalia who com menced its use and caught a beau the very next day, and now she better look out or s e may catch something el.-e. Gentlemen who dance to the music of the "or enadeshould have long night-gowns made espec ially for the purpose. Lexington Register Or strap their short ones down. Twelve thousand shovels and 9,000 spades are turned out every week in the United States. Ex. And yet old Mr. Joues who always "borrys'' when he wants one can't be made to believe there is a single factory running. A woman is the most inconsistent compound of obstinacy and self-sacrifice that I am acquainted with. Rich ter. And yet it is probable he had only met German women; had he been acquainted with an Ameri can mother-in-law now it would have taken a vol ume of old Jean Paul to have told the story. Jumping the rope sometimes snaps the thread of life. Exchange. It is to be hoped theSOth of June will be one of the times. Rev. M. Lyon, of Bridgeport, preached Sunday night on thenational sin. Exchange. And the next day Deacon Smith, for the first time in five years omitted kissing the little widow who lived over his business house. .Tno. B. Gough, the temperance lecturer, is suffering from neuralgia of the stomach. And is that what they call it when a fellow burns his copper out ?' A cane was voted to the greatest liar in War renton, Missouri, and a grocer carried off the prize. The two editors ia the town received but three vote between them Exchange. Thsremustbe some mistake about this, or there was no dry goods housss in the town. As far as the editors are concerned they get "held up" quite often for telling the truth. W have had men come fifty miles to prevent us from telliug the truth. Some of the laiie-s of Louisville. Ky., want to establish a "temperance saloon." Exchange. We are now puzzled. A teinioranee saloon must be something equal to a female woman who goes on a whizz, stimulating with Seltzer water with a straw, to look through to take off the strawbery shade which is reflected from the "blood on the moon." Of the nine female physicians in this city, only one keeps a buggy. Louisville Courier Journal. And not one keeps a secret only until she meets another of her sex. When I started on the newspapers I heard con siderable about John Young .Gath. Did you hear anything about John Brown? Four young ladies of Michigan, wishing to find a life of adventure on the plains, started down Grand river in a boat. They have not since been heard from. Detroit Tribune. Yes, they have been heard from. They arrived in Boonville the other day, and found it a very qui et town, and concluded to stop. They have all be come daughters of the regiment, and belong to the Waddill guards. They will find all the "adventure"' they want in that command. Servant girls used to have a penchant for wear ing the mistress' dresses when "going out," but that time has "played out. Lowville Democrat. The servant girl of to-day would not like to le saen with saeh shabby clothes as characterize the average mistress wardrobe. The immortal Bernhardt has grown careless of public approval since her marriage. She vras coldlv received during her latf performance at Milan, and cooly walked off the stage and went to her h tel in the middle ot tne play. new 1 one independent. Our very moral cotempoary does not evea hint what she went for, or is.the Independent kid-ding? The women who cony the ways of men, at best, succeed ia resembling boys Pall Mall Gazette. When they copy after men, they do so at their peril. It takes "right smart" to make them mas culine in everything. Glasgow, Ky., has but one minister. Ex. That preacher has an easy time and a soft en gagement, we 11 net a nicxie ne never pronounces the benediction but he mentally says, "for this job, O ! Lord, we thank Thee" etc. Pimples, blotches, or sores disappear under the influence of Glenn's Sulphur Soap. Pike's Toothach6 Drops cure in one minute. Shirts best at Walmsley's.