Newspaper Page Text
rim SEDAlA A WJiUiilvL.1 J3A2.UO JANUARY 7, 1890.
GRAND BALL. And Barquet Under the Auspi ces of the Sedalia Flambeau Club. 'The ball given by the Sedalia Flam- ,.. .r!i"Ko?RP,PflrfchntftlTnpR- in vcij ' A til. gre l CreUlt UU U """6- mine uou iuu t- on1 ofTott tyiqtitioi ool musi utuuiux A f U nnpr pnd of thft hflll a fP.TTJ- iuv uorarv auxK"K "ttV biue, and above it in the shape of a 2oS fl;;gs sU7moumed6 the krge - . m TTT .J U U W" rU III! - I I V X III eoideu eagle belonging to the club s flg staff, tfeiuw tne oaicony a group ni pvprcrreens was macea ana amid these were posed three VM. ' B figures clad in the well known white uniforms which the club was wont to wear in iis paiouco. ;- - base of the evergreens ercreens a wiue uauu ui red, white and blue was placed and on the wall above were nambeaus ana , i the wail aoove were uamueu auu sides of the room were the large pla- cards wnicn ornameniea auu ueesiguu-i .... I 1 -. xea ine w wmuu ouo buc u.uuu .mi J D Hollister, General Fassenger memorable trip to Washington, A t StepheD8 Supt 0fTranspor overhead stretching from the iour - - o il t? u. a V .1.- mmn.- m tttoo o nannntT I C(ruera 01 tu iuuu nr v,aUwPJ formed of red, white and blue bunting and filling the space in the center was! the beautiful silken flag with which i.1 1 J . a( Unriolia nyaaonral rho I , , m?1 U1 T t club during the late presidential camDRicn. The room was brilliantly lighted with electric lights and the The decoration committee, to whom much credit is due for the taste and wgenuny disp ayed was composed of tbeloilowmg club members, mmh. WUl Xom wj. juii umy fiemin ana uiu urueoiuer. .118 cwD memoera witu complished captain Mr. John Glenn and handsome lieutenant, Mr. H. T ,The club members with their aC- wiinams, were iicurijr u iuu ura.Buuuwr "-u -u-g made of satin heavily gilt and fringe'!, witnagrace woica wou uuCm iuu.u uiiiiiBuuu. Ihe supper under the personal n.anagemeiit or Mr. o. u. aonw, w Jaid on taoies wnicn were ueuuruuju in a most beautiful mauner with fruits, Japanese fruit napkins and webbed or ne:e and macaroons. The meuu cards were ornamented similar to the beautiful invitations sent out by the club" and the menu itself was an elaborate one as follows : Ovsters. New York Counts, Fried. Celery in Branches. Mayonaiae of Shrimps. Boast Turkey, Cranberry Sauce, Cream Slaw. Smoked Buffalo Tongue, Lobster Salad. Columbia Biver Salmon, Boiled Sugar Cured Ham, Potato Salad. Chicken Salad. Lettuce. Orange Ice. Cocoanut Meringue Cake, grange .Layer uaKe, Macaroon Pyramid, Gold Webbing, Orange Pyramid, Silver Webbing, Angel Food, Variegated Ice Cream, Bananas, Oranges, Nuts, Kaisins, Assorted Candies. Oolong Tea. Java Coffee. The music was furnished by Gregg's orchestra and the dance programme was as follows : 1. Grand March Waltz. o 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. Quadrille.. Polka; ' i Lanciers. Wahz. Quadrille. Newport. Pribienne. If 11 INTERMISSION. 9. Larciers Saratoga 10 Sohottische. 11 Qundrille. 12 P-lka. 13. Waltz Lancers. 14 Yorke. . 15. Quadrille Tucker. 16. Waltz. , The various 'committees were &b follows: Arrangement committee C. H. H ! Kockwell, W. H. Kamsey, -1-1 T- T 1 T7I l TT.. 1 I IT' T n-ntn Unnl. M rxa-n tr Hllrrhaa I rlA Irl' rt 6 ' G. b. Conrad, John W. Gross. Reception committeeCapt. John GlennjLieut. H. T. Williams, Lieut C. N. Yn Buren, H. W, Meuschke, A. Le Burr JJ. Cx. Urawford, A. V. Deutsche, H. C. Demuth, H. H. Elemming, E S.J Hughen, W. M. Jobas, James O'Brien, Ellis R. Smith, Invitation committee G. N. Van Buren W. C. Gould, D. C. McDou- fal, H, T. Williams, J. P. Lamy, C. Igenfritz. ' The ladies were not in fall dre as Ja u9 butiked handwme m 8tret and home aresess. Among the large number present may be mentioned Mr. and Mn. Bobert Kamaer, Mr." and Mra. wn tu". mA Wjll Yott, Mr. and Mrs. Lquii B eck, Mr, and Mrs. J. . H. Hill, Mr. and Mra. Bruce Yates, Mr. and Mra. John Ahrens, Mr. and Mrs. Charles Conrad, Mr. Mr. and Mrs. Herman Ludemun, Mr. and Mrs. Chae. Guenther, Mr. and Mrs. Ellis Smith, Mr. and Mrs. James O'Brien, Mr. and Mrs. Heniy Weiese, Mioses Cora Beck, Euphemia Highleyman, Lla Burr Daisy Shy Maud Lyon, Tberesa McSweeney, of zheB. Jbanme Messrs. Van Buren. Gross. Guenther. Kennedy VVrIr.hr Mnn,7QQ TornQB b'aatv i i 1 1 t: u iigemriu,, xvigao. J-ienuY, Dixon, Highleyman : Misses Brent I wiWi0 Ui xiiucucuucuuu, i ri n ii i i . . T -r -p. J,iau "tuci HONORING THE JUDGE. Justice Brewer Passes Through and Beceives a Fine Flo ral Present. ted Justice of the Supreme Court, . . w o u Mo pacific en route to i- wu: a . i uaoscu l until uu biam xiu. uu tuc his duties afc WaBhington. At n Sunt E Treasurer McDonald,' Gen! 4. i pftlinr.ir mim Anf 1 A-J.UUWA U. A U1IVUBI JU.U4 ULk.Uk UIUUU UlYCCUCY, UCU. XiClUUb ncut ' ' node. Passenger Apent Mealier. o0. Trm a fnDW jnu Mnnfnm. j "r & r nfR;Qa When th train arrfved th fc . T boarded the rear car and greeted Mr. Brewer After fche galutatiou Mr Mt rnrTT u.tr.,!!., cho8eg worj8 pre8ented Mr.' Brewer lcoo T,f Ti,M ao n nnm wlofolTr v a- w rO0T,Arwioi :n i ... , . , been hear(J on ike j,, The train was delayed but a few min utes and as it nulled out the. earnest r lh 13 1 i t wishes of "bon voyage5 his Qew nQ from aJ1 thered were general Jud Brewer . pleasant appearing gentleman of about 50 iculorl read 8 eakers President Harrison's appointment of hlm t0 tje ij h poamon on the Su- e Bench3 cn6idered one of the be3(. cou,d haye made NAPOLEON'S ONE NOVEL. A Sensational IiOtq Story Written by the aiatcoiess (Jorstcsn. The New York World has dragged from its obscurity a sensational love story written by Napoleon Bonaparte in his college days. It is possible that the story is a "fake," but as Bourienne. Napoleon's private secre- tarVt preserved it and handed it down to posterity, the presumption is that it is genuine. A glance at this forgot ten romance shows that the great Corsican possessed in no small degree the gift of vivid and graphic story telling. The short novel now rather cruelly thrust upon the public reads wonderfully like the intense and sensa tional dime fiction of the present day. Perhaps under favorable circumstances Napoleon would have been the Dumas of his day, but it is likely that his first crude effort disgusted him, and he threw it aside. Undoubtedly the poor and friendless student in those days had the literary craze, and had it bad. Besides his novel, he wrote a drama, but he was no better satisfied with this than he was with his story. So he reluctantly laid down the pen and took up the sword. It is enough to make the stern conquorer turn in his grave to have this folly of his youth spread before the eyes of the readers of this generation. There can be no doubt that it is treating a great man very unjustly and shabbily to make public the literary efforts of his boyish days. Very few of our best writers would show up well under such a test Some of our successful men have voluntarily given to tn world, tne compositions written when they were in their teens, but it is suspected that they revised thejr work very carefully and mad radical changes. But the whole bftsi ness shows how little is really known of a man's inner life and his secret as pirations. Napoleon's fellow-student could form no estimate of his future greatness, ani those who knew him in -1 - - 1 .i . UJLO AUtt.liUl.eL K v ms maxurer years never areamea tnai he had missed one of his pet aims in and was Uke Richelieu a Mlure Mter allf even & man a very queer beingf and somQm time3 his thoughtSf methods and mis- tekea are very much like tlK)gQ 0j Bmall men. Atlanta Constitution. Barnum's Arabs speak four lan- fuages, but they prefer the one taught tnem 7 tneir mothers at the home of their birth in New Jersey. Norria town Herald. How to Care ah skiQ BifeMiw. Simply apply "Swayne's Ointment." No internal medicine required. Cures letter, ecemt, itch, all eruptions on the face, kandg, nose, &c. leaving the ikia clear, white and healthy, Its treat healin and curative powers are poesewedbT no other ik your drufor Sw.jnei Ointment, OPEN HOUSE. How the Good Old Custom was Observed by the Ladies of Sedalia. ot isew The old Knickerbocker custom xeara cans is gradually going into a statu of inocuous desuetude and .n a few years fr isa this time the custo aw be referred to aa a thing of the past. There are, however, still a fevr who believe that uu interchange of courtesies on the day whena new j ear has opened itsgites to whatever the fu'ure may bring is too eautiful to be 1 . and among these were the following Sedalians. mbs. jackson's. At the residence ot Mrs. A. A. Jackson, corner of Broadway and Park ayenue, a host of handsome and attractive young ladies were found, who with their hostess made everv caller welcome in that genuine iasnion wnicn rcnaracienzes a long ex penence in southern hospitality. ine resiuence itseii is a handsome one and the arrange ment is iHBtefui in the extreme, many of the furnishings being heirlooms in the lamily, and betokening elegance as well as taste. The reception rooms were beauti fully lighted for the occasion and the re freshment table was decorated with fruiu-, etc, and laid with china 150 years old Meals, salads, sandwiches, cake3, French wafers, coffee and Eussiaa tea were served to the callers, and vocal and instrumental music enlivened the occasion. Mrs Jackson were a black rhadame silk with thread lace garniture. Miss Yarina Jackon wore a quaiat and beautiful gown, which belonged to her mother's wedding trosseau, of India muiie, richly trimmed with h niton lace, pointed white satin bodice aud garniture of pink moire ribbon. Miss Floy Jackson wore a pretty and becoming dress of black silk, with the front covered with scarlet and buck stripe! gauze, sash if black ditted net, full, round wafet cut deiui dtcoe'e, edged with lace and fastened with a silver butterfly, elbow sleeves, black gloves aud buck fan. Miss Brest Forms of Independence, Mo.. cream crepe du cbien, with greqoe bodice, edged with wide white silk gimp brail, wide striped satin sash, long white silk gants, white gauze fan. Miss Adah l?orbis of Independence, Mo., lilac crepe du chien, over pale pitik satin petticoat, bodice cut pointed, filled with uink satin, wide pink satin sasb. tuermei roses and pink satin fan. Mrs. D. M. Dodge, nile green and cream china siik, empire collar 01 verie crevn plufeh, neck square filled with lace, elbow puffed sleeves, large white gauz tan, white undressed gants, finished at the lop with verte green ribbun. Miss Fannie (ake of .Nevada, Mo., cream china silk with wide sash, decolette. edge1 with point ducheese lace, long silk gants, corsage boquet of bng ish violets Miss Georgia Htynes, dress of ciearu albatross, bodice cut pointed back ami front, decolette fattened across the shoul der with band of pearl embriodery, cream gloves, sash of cream ribbon tied at the back, cream satin fan. XI IBB JlIuv Cunnuinoa, blole lujio a. lb, with full over draptries of black and silver gauze, bodice demi decolette with full sleeves and nrck finish of the gauzj, black fan, black gants and pearl necklace Miss Lvdia Kent, sea loam L-uina silk. with full cream and silver over draperies, neck half round, full fcleeves and over bod ice of the gauze, pearl ornaments anu cream gauze fan. Mibs Gusta Cotton, sailor blue Uiina silk, flecked with ecarlet, sailor blue plush bodice, wide sailor blue silk sash, necklet of gold beads, scarlet aud blue satin fan. Miss HattieHnghts, pale blue crepe du chein, demi decolette and sleeveless, wide belt finished n-ith pearl embroidery, raer- met rose, full lace sleeves, cream silk ;nts and cream satin inn. The hours at the Jackson mansion were from 3 to 9 p. m. and many callers were present. MBS. MILLER'S. At the residence of Mrs. R. T. Miller, No. 121 Broadway, the scene was a pretiy and a pleasant one, and the reception and refreshment rooms were made most at tractive with articles of bric-a-brac, plants, etc. Ine retresnment room conimea one ong table, laid with china and silvtr, and the iruits and cakes were served in IIhi baskets, coffee was served in dainty china, and colored ices aleo added to this feature of the occasion. Mrs. Millei received in a dress of black gros gr:dn and dotted net, with garniture of black ribbons. Mis Hattie Miller wore a golden brown &ilk with bebe waist over scailet silk, full scarlet silk sleeves, scarlet moire sush. Miss Lilla Harris, plum blue crepe du chein, with pointed plum blue velvet bod ice, filled with cameo pink Eilk, necklace of gold beads. Mi68 Kuby Gentry, pale blue silk, wild entire overdress of black dot led net, pale bine satin sash, pale blue satin fan. Miss Hal lie Morrison, 01 Denver, Lol., black feibatross, with wide black sash, bod ice finished with black and white satin, black gloyes and black fan. The hours were from 5 to 10 p. m. and callers were coming and going during the entire time, who much enjoyed the hos pitable and kmdly welcome fhicH tney re ceived. MBS. HaWKTNs At the elegant residence of Mrs. Kate Hawkins, No. 315 East Broadway, the scene was a most beautiful one and those who had the pleasure of being present will long remember tne occasion, ine reception rooms were banked with ferns aud potted plants, and beneatk the rays of masy tinted wax can dles, they presented a most effective ap pearance. The refreshment room contained at one end a pyramid of ferns plants and Chinese lillies, and tie table laid with a beautiful lunch cloth and ornamented with fruiu and fiowers was beautiful to look upon. Atthesilyer samovar and coffee urn at either end of the table, tne jounr adies receiving took turns in serving their cnests. and the refre hments of sandwiches salted almondr, cakes, fruits and .elmcnico ices were served by two special waiters. Barisftthe,diccussion of the refrethascnts a arctic box lent its sweet charsat, aad in the reception room niano and otaermn- sk filled in the tiae. All tkt yoaof ladiee I who were announced to receive, were pres em with the exception ol Miss Mamie Mckey, who was, to the regret of all, con fined to her home with an attack of illne.ss. i Mrs. Hawkins received in a dress of black rhadame, entirely coyered with black lace. Miss May Hawkins wore a pale pink china silk, over a black velvet petticoat, black velvet finish to the demidtcoe e 1 bodice, long black gloves, black maraoout faH Lecj.ac, gojd bedH Miss dat - Shikof Jit. Carroll, III., dress of golden brown ciepe du chein, half round neck edged with duchesse point, wbite silk fan, poppy red moire 8iSh. Miss Daisy Ittpl, pink crepe du rhin and satin, decolette, sleeveless, bodice edged with? cream whiteAhy;cinths, long uudrea-ed kid gants, cream white and pink ian, goiu ceau necklace Miss Blanche Latour cream white satin, with bodice cut decolette and pointed, e:ged with deep fall of pale pink lillie of the yalley, wide angel sleeyea of pale pink fish net, pale pink lillies of the valley in Ihe hair pale pink satin fan and Eoraan gold necklace. Mfss Gertie aulhaber, pale pink j-urth satin, vuuieiy covereu wiiu Hiiver wnite striped gauze caught with rosettes of raveled tilk, demi decolette bodice, wide cream moire sxsb, pink and cream satin fan. Miss Alice Newkirk. crepe du chein. with full draperies, decolette, sleeveless, wide cream satin sash, gold necklace, pale blue marabout fan. cream gants. Miss Bessie Shirk, cream albatross, with wide sash of cream satin, full lace tleeves, round neck, edged with duchesse lace, loug oiack gloves, cream gauze fan, marchal niel and tea rose. Miss Florence Lamy, pale pink alba tross, trimmed with bands of white moire ribbon, wide belt of overlapping moire rib bon, neck finished with point duchesse, cream and pink fan, long cream undressed kid gant. Mips Myrtle Sturtevanf, daffodil yellow gauze over dariodil yel ow silk, trimmed with black velvet, black fan aud Jong black gloves. Miss Jessie Smith, cream silk entirely covered with cream white striped gauze, demi decollette bodice covered with the g-uze ami edged with Parma violets. Parma violets holding the skirt draperies, long tan gloves, Ian of cream white satin. It:.. 11 T 111 . . r . ansa .iay ianes, oi-ck suran wim iuu black fish net draperies, long black gloves, tea and Marchal niel rotes, black satiu fan. Miss Jennie Jaynes, cream white alba tross, with wide cream satin sash, white tin fan, gold bead necklace, tea roses. Two beautiful little pages, Miss Mary Temple and Lionel Lalour received the quests at the door and were much admired, both for themselves and their pretty cos tumes. Miss Mary wore a smoke gray crepe du chein, with full skirt and bebe wais4 trimmed with wide bands of pale pink rib bon. Master Lionel wore a Fauntleroy costume of gray cloth and velvet. The souvenirs made by the young ladies receiving, were gilded scroll sticks, uniting a iquare of cream bolting cloth bearing the nsmes of the entire pary acd tied with pink, blue and cream ribbon. Uhe souvenirs wt-re passed on silvei waiters by Misses M-ible Bieler and Irene Fenmltt. MijlR Mhl arnr cna riot olotl. with black velvet bodice, Miss Irene wore myrtle treen cloth with jockey jacket ol ulack velvet and both looked pretty and attractive. Mrs. D. J. Temple who assisted in en tertaining, wore a costume of black rhadame and lace. The hours were from 5 to 9 and 'he en tire afiair was handsomely managed and mny gentlemen were present during the entire time. After the leception proper a special number of the gue3ts were enter tained with a caroet dance. MBS. D. T. MILLER. At the residence of Mrs. D. T. Miller, No. 723 East Fifth street, there was a most hospitable and enjoyable occasion and the young ladies who welcomed the many g nests, will not soon be forgotten for their graceful and kindly hospitality. These were, Misses Kate M. "Walters, Mrs. Mil ler's handsome niece, who is spending her vacation here, Birdie Clark, Hortense McVey, Helea Nelson, of Warrenton, Mo., Lizzie and Susie Murray, Claudia Whrprecht, Miller Kayaendall, Anna Berthour, Nannie Self, Gertie Leach and Lida Rucker. The reception rooms and refreshment rooms were prettily and tfFectively decorated with potted piants and brilliantly lighted. The refreshments of sandwiches, salads, cakes, fruits and ice3, were carefully served from a table laid with fine China and silver, and during the entire reception vocal and instrumental music lent a pleasing charm. The receiv ing young ladies were not in evening dress, but wore house costumes of silk, henrietta, and velvet in which they all looked ex ceedingly well. The hours were from 2 to 9 p. m., aud during that time many gentlemen tendered the compliments of the season. MBS. BERRY. At the residence of Hardy L. Berry there were several young ladies assemb'ed to greet their friends, these being Misse Stella Co'e, Orr Parker and Ida Berry of Kansas City. The rooms were all prettily decorated and the refreshments of Califor nia fruits, cakes, coffee etc., served on small wicker luncheon tables covered with beautifully embroidered luncheon cloths. Mrs. Berry wore a dress of cream colored silk and blue velvet richly trimmed with Persian embroidery. Miss Cole wore cream albatross and ma hogany plush, with cream sash, neck filled with point duchesse, tea roses. Miss Parker wore cream flannel and silk, with cream moire sash, marchal niel roses. The hours were from 2 to 9 and a large number of gentlemen called. T.H.C.L At the Y. M. C. A. rooms the scene was a pleasant one and many callers made the hours rapidly pass away. Refreshments of cakes, fruits and coffee were served by Misses Ella and Anna Hertz Stella Montgomery, Eva Gold, Gertie Po teet, Carrie Walker, EUa Cummings, Hat tie Elliott, Lena aUthenv, Goodrich and Anna Bank. Miss Ssllie Major, at the residence of her father, T. T. Major, assisted by Mistses Mary and Cora Thompson, received their friends in an informal Manner and the oc casion was a most enjoyable one THE JOLLY OLD MARINER. A Jolly old mariner sailing the sea, Wa3 roaring a solo and thus thundered he. "Our ship is as bold as an eagle on wing. And she carries a cargo that's fit for a king; ' A cargo that's welcome to peasant or pope, Our ship she is laden with IVORY SOAP. " I've plowed all the oceans to every port. To visit all nations and climes is my sport; We carry our goods to the ends of the world. Our trade is announced on our banner unfurled; Seel b.axoned on pennant from top-mast and rope: We bring to all people the Ivory Soap.' " From Procter & Gamble, my lads, do you mind ? We carry a blessing to gladden mankind ; For dirt is a foe to the body and soul. And soap must precede e'en the gospel's control ; Then hurrah! hip hurrah I for philanthropy's hop, Hurrah for the advent of Ivory Soap. "Its bars, like the truth, or a Iifesaving boat, Ever rise to the top and triumphantly float; As the foam on the wind-fretted billow 'tis light, As the elephant's tusk it is glossy and white; The poets ail praise it in measure and trope, The ocean is thundcringIVORY SOAP." A WORD OF WARNING. There are many white soaps, each represented to be " just as good as the 'Ivory V they ARE NOT, but like aii counterfeits, of the genuine. Ask for Ivory" Soap and SHE LOVED A SWINDLER. Proot of His Duplicity Drove Miss Nichols to Suicide. . Lowell, Mass., Dec, 30. The cause of tflo licapaaranoa and pmnaKln entnt.'o a Miss Sarh C. Nichol,of this city, is found in a Usiatch published on Christ mas morning from AValpole stating that Miss arah C. Nicberson, of Lynn, had been victimiz-'i by a sharper from California. Th num's name was Charles Metcalf, and it wan alleged that, becoming ttcquamW with Miss Nickerson while she was vin ing a wealthy friend at Lynn, he induced her to intru-t to him $i,000 to invest ii stocks. The investment failed to turn on as represented was a swindle, in fact. Mks Nickerton." ithassuce been learned, was Mif Nichols, the missins lady. The kt-y to the mvstery lies in a fact not heretofore pub ished, in consideration of the fte'ings of the relatives. Miss Aicholh ibout a year Pgo became engaged to be married to Metcalf. Her friends remoa strated She was over nity years of age. and little that as good was known of him. The influence which was brought to beai caused a rupture of the engagement. Mt Nichols was possetsed 01 ample property in her own right and would not feel the lots of the money. It was the disappoint ment ensuing upon the man s deception and the publicity thnt led to her disappear ance. tbe brooded over her love hffair and imagined that her friends shunned her 0 - rt-t 1 1 i; onaccou.toi it. ine scanoai inv. jving her former lover was a terrible blow to her, and, writing the note f und in her room, "Forgive and forget," ehe ent out. to end her ine by suicide. BLACK-DRAUGHT tea cures Constipation. A Frenchman's Queer Will. French judge3 have just decided & most extraordinary will case. A Frenchman of wealth named Travers had conceived an intense hatred for his country. When, he died five years ago he willed his property to 4the poor ot Lionaon" alter tnese woras: I have always been oppressed in my native land. I have arrived at the age of forty-five, and liave never "been my own master. .riorriDie nation; People of cowards and blockheads! I should like to have milliards to give to the English, who are the born ene- mies 01 tnis idiotic trance. nis is clear and to the point" The relatives of M. Travers naturally disputed this will on the ground that the testator was not of sound mind, and that the will, being framed in hatred of France, was contrary to "public order," and, lastly, that it could not be carried out in England as there was no legal rep-i reientatlve of the poor. But the court overruled all these objections, and the ''appeal subsequently made has just Men rejected. juonuon JLimes. Iapcmuat &ue We are now waking small tise Bile BesM (40 little beans in each bottle). They are the most convenient to use . s pecially adapted for children and wonee, Price 25 cents a bottle, J. F Smith A Co. : St. Louis, Mo. lack the peculiar and remarkable qualities insist upon getting it. " "A LITTLE" N'ONSENSE. We have often stopped in themi&4 dle of an. article to wonder why meil do not use looking glass to make arw ficial eyes. Binghamton KepublicanJ Lady lawyer I demand the charge of my client, your honor' Counsel for plaintiff "May I asku what grounds?" Lady lawyerT-'W because." Burlington Free Press bcribuler ate two Welsh rarebit three portions of terrapin, a plate ice cream, a lemon meringue pie anc a lobster salad, and now says he's g the writer's cramp. Harper's Bazmrvj Parson "Now, my little girl, caa? you tell me what beautiful verse yoi have learned to speak at the Sundai school concert?" Little Elsie (who undergoing a course of spring m cine, reciting) "And Jesus sai( 'Sulphur is good for little childrenlnJ Lowell Citizen. r Customer "Here, waiter, ordered a bowl of half and half. isn't it" Waiter "Yes, sah, daVs d very ahticle." Customer "What! Do you mean to tell me that is hi milk and half creamP' Waiter "Ol no, sah: I mean half milk an' hilt watah, sah." America. Customer "You sell cracked egj at half-price, do you not?" Clerk- "les m, we always make anity pel cent reduction on cracked good! Anything else to-day?" Customed JLOO juu uaajr gtfo uiu c uvum h your fifty cents." Omaha World. Base-ball maiden "Yes, Mr. Jol lots, all is over between us. Here the ring." Mr. Joblots "I am to derstand then, Mabel, that our gagement is at an end?" Base maiden ".bxactly. i give you jot release and expect to sign a new mi the latter part of the week. Goodi bye." Minneapolis Tribune. j Good Boys. Proud father "Golaif - ter start 'r church and Sunday sch are yer? Well, Tve got two mighi good boys wot'U do for yer Bible cl They never told a lie in their liv here thev come now. Boys, whei did yer git that fowl!" The gc bovs "Stold it" Proud father "See, parson! Erlie couldn't live them boys' mouths." Munsey'i Weekly. Hibbard's Bheamatic Syrup. There is certainly something remarkable in this preparation, as it is meeting with a success never attained by any other med icine. It never fails, if used as directed For over twenty years I have been a great sufferer from the effects of a diseased stomach, and for three years pest av been unable to do basinets. Two year aso mr case was pronounced incurable. I 1 id Tisiiea aiaerent water cuxvs sou cubim & all tn nn nnrooM- Last Jnna I hen SI & using Hibbard's .Rheumatic Syrup (pre pared by Bhramatic 8yrup Co., Jacno Mich.,) and at once began to feel setter. I have used thirteen bottles,, and asa a well an. Edwabp Bayte, Haeter Mechanic aad Blackeatitk, 202 Jackson Street, Jioksoo, Mick W. E. Bard, Druggist. t 3 31