fHE SEDALIA WEEKLY BAZOO OCTOBER 27, 1891
Re?. C. T. Brady Talks Them Up
Iu a Very Able Manner
Rev. C. T. Brady, rector of Calvary
church, preached to the physicians
banday night and hu discourse was
an excellent one.
The attendance was not large but
Only one physician who belongs to
the Pettis county medical society was
One homeopathic devotee was pres
ent, lie is not recognized by tbe
medical society because the pills he
uses are not "regular" eizs.
Several apothecaries were on hand
to learn bow to make jalap.
Dr. binitu, a dental surgeon was
there to see if the rector would tell
how to extract a molar aDd allow the
victim to stand sti'l and square on his
The only doctors not represented
were the honorable horse doctors and
the villianous abortionists.
The preacher read for his first les
son from the Apocrypha, Eicleaias
tess, XXXVII chapter.
Speaking of the physician it says :
"The Lord hath created him."
That is correct, as he created all
The medical colleges turn out car
loads of new doctors every year who
are loaded down with diplomas and
He don't have much hand in di
plomas on sheep skin. His diplomas
are in the countenances of Hisollow
ers and in their good works.
"All have a deep interest in those
who are to administer to their wants
when sick," said the preacher.
That is a fact, especially when be
presents his bill at 82 per visit.
Ht. Luke and St. Paul were associ
ated together in their good works and
while St. Luke felt of the pulse and
looked at the tongue, St. Paul in
quired if they had been reading the
KflTuqm City Sun and patronizing
the bucket shop. In other words,
while one looked after the bodily ill,
the other inquired after the diseased -
It is ditterent, in a measure, now,
Mr. Brady. The undertaker gener-
erally gets in his work directly after
tbe present at. liuke and betore tne
latter day St. Paul has time to com
pass the situation.
"A physician,1' said Mr. Brady,
"should be highly educated, a pol
ished gentleman, a man thoroughly
versed in his calling and one who
loves his profession with the greatest
A doctor who don t idolize bis pro
fession could not cure the measles,
jaundice, itch or the ills attendant
upon a serious case of well directed
"Peter's wife's mother lay sick
of a fever," and Peter sent for a
Now-a days when your mother-in
law is sick, the doctor is about the
last man sent for.
If Doctor Carter were living, tbey
would send for him.
He was very slow, but an awful
.clever man and attended the Salva
tion army regularly.
Mr. Brady said doctors should be
poets, punters and preachers, with
the love of God in their hearts.
Wc don' think there is achy m the
west that has as many praying doctors
as Sedalia according to the -number.
But as for painters they could not be
trusted to paint a kitchen floor. As
for writing poetry none have made a
half a scholar even. Preaching
wonldnot be just to their hand but none
of the doctors in Sedalia would make
a failure as single-footed exhorters.
St. Luke and St. Paul were ship
wrecked on the Mediterranean Sea in
a boat of many tons burthen. It was
aa awful disaster and the whole story
was told in a few verses in theXXVH
chapter of Acts. They were saved
from watery graves by the aid of
boards and broken pieces of the ship.
If the latter day reporter had been
assigned to write up the disaster he
would have scooped St. Paul on the
details aud occupied at least a page in
a metropolitan journal, but the inci
dents of the shipwreck has its lesson
and the rector made the most of it in
The preacher dwelt upon the igno
rant doctor. He should not be toler
ated in any community. The apothe
caries present could have given Mr.
Brady some good points on this
The doctor must, to be successful,
a cheerful man, full of sympathy,
kind and consoling words. No place
in a sick, chamber for a long counte
nance and solemn face.
That is a grave fact, Mr. Brady.
Tbe meat solemn faced man we ever
knew was a doctor in Indiana. He
borrowed four dollars of the writer
and we never saw him afterward. We
have worn a solemn face ever since
when we thought of him.
"Patience is a great virtue. A doc-
tor must be a patient man" said the
preacher, "and .wLen one kind of
medicine does not restore to health,
try another," he continued.
That's what they generally do. If
tbey don't think the person visited
needs any drugs they will give him
bread pills. "He presses the pulse"
and nature "does the rest." As for
trying different remedies, that is what
they are compelled to do or take in
their sign. They try everything in the
materia medica except advertising in
the columns of a newspaper of known
circulation like the Bazoo. There is
no salve for such an omission.
"The most skilled physician cannot
effect a cure without tbe help of Got.
He is the Great Doctor who heals all"
said Mr. Brady.
"Earth has no sorrow that Heaven
cannot heal," but we knew a reporter
once who had a continuous case of
"spring fever' and we think he wou'd
have given heaven a hard pull to heal
him, for a poor news item would out
run him 100 feet in every 100 yards.
The sermon was listened to very at
tentively and tbe rectoi'a thoughts
were well and effectively expressed.
Next Sunday night he will talk to
the lawyers. Billie Steele, George
Longan, Col. Henry Lamm, John
Caehman and all others should at
tend. The rector should ssnd to
Kansas and get Will Work Somebody
Snoddy to hold up as a horrible ex
ample of a lawyer, who always took
everything his client bad unless it
was fastened with a Yale lock and the
key thrown in tbe cistern.
ELECTRIC BIT! EES.
This remedy Is becoming so well known
and so popular as to Deed no special men
tion. All who hare used Electric Bitters
sing the same song ol praise. A purer
medicine does not exist and it is guaran
teed to do all that is claimed. Electric
Bitters will cure all diseases of the Liver
and Kidneys, will remove Pimples. Boils.
Bait Rheum and other affections caused by
impure blood. Will drive Malaria from
the system and prevent as well as care all
Malarial fevers. For care of headache.
Consumption and Indigestion try Electric
Bitters Entire satisiacuon guaranteed, or
money refunded. Price 60 eta., and $1.00
per bottle at Mertz & Hale's Drag store.
A BIT OF MISSOURI ROMANCE.
Kansas City Star.
The felonious termination of the
case of the state of Missouri versus
Colonel Richard Liddell recalls an
episode of bygone interest of the peo
ple of Western Missouri Ten years
ago Colonel Liddell was a member of
that brilliant staff which surrounded
Colonel Jesse James, whose trusted
friend and valued lieutenant be was.
Colonel Liddell was a gentleman of
fine personal presence and most en
gaging manners despite the disagree
able exigencies of his calling and the
necessity of vigorous, even austere
conduct. According to the legends of
that period Uolonel Liiudell was accus
tomed to penetrate into the towels of
Kay county, where he was often
thrown icto tbe societv of Colonel
Wood Hite, another admirer and
humble follower of Colonel James.
It must be understood that Colonel
Liddell was a "divil of a fellow
the ladies" per reason of the
romantic nature of his vocation
and the acknowledged charm of his
address. One day so the legend
runs Colonel Liddell and Colonel
Hite were discussing in a somewhat
heated way the merits and demerits
of a certain nymph, whose identity
has not been established, and from
argument rapidly proceeded to the
more effective use of firearms. Colonel
Liddell had already perforated Colonel
Hite once or twice in a convincing
manner, when Colonel Robert Ford,
who was an interested spectator of
the debate, wearied of the apparently
friendly discussion and put two bul
lets into Colonel Hite's head. As
Colonel Hite thereupon evinced a
disinclination to continue the argu
ment Colonel Liddell and Colonel
Ford took him out and buried him,
and from that moment de
cided that they were bound
together by a tie more enduring than
the ordinary bond of friendship.
This was in February, 1832, or
thereabout In April of the same year
Colonel Ford resumed his pistol prac
tice. As Colonel James was hanging
pictures one day in his cozy home in
St, Joseph but why repeat a story
which is now a part of the romantic
literature of Missouri ? After Colonel
James had been laid away with im
pressive ceremonies near the old fam
ily villa in Clay county, it became
necessary for the state of Missouri to
take formal action respecting the dis
appearance of Colonel Hite. In view,
however, of the distinguished public
services of Colonel Ford, abetted by
the earnest moral support of Colonel
Liddell, the state of Missouri was iu
au awkward predicament. It was rea
soned that Colonel Hite was a danger
ous menace to tbe morals of society
and that his death, far from being an
evidence of crime, was a great public
blessing and a token of providential
interposition. Accordingly Colonel
Ford was released with a warn
ing to use proper care in
tbe subsequent employment of
firearms. Colonel Liddeli's case
was distinguished by the rapidity
ml all Malarial PI rders, tafcs that old tm
mmiaxaat wraderfal csteacy,
, G erman Bitter.
$1.00 kr Bottle, six for $5.00.
JOHNSTON, HOLLOWAY & CO.,
which characterizes criminal iurispru
dence in Missouri, and was finally set-
tied a day or two ago. Colonel .Lid
dell was running a string of horses in
tbe east, and was naturally indignant
that he should be called upda to make
a long and tedious journey to answer
to so simple and inconsequential
charge. He was measurably soothe )
nowever, wnen upon arrival the case
was dismissed with proper apologies.
The romantic story of Colonel Lid
dell will live long after the colonels of
the great storm and stress period of
Missouri's chivalry have passed away
It is not to the diminution of Colonel
Liddelrs future fame that he is run
ning a string of horses in the east,
cor to the peril of Colouel Ford's
glory that he occasionally vends
drinks in the far west Their nlace
in history is assured along with their
great captain, who sleeps quietly near
tbe battlefields and the railway tracks
or ciay county.
ABE YOUR CHILDREN SUBJECT
As a preventive and cure for croun
Chamberlain's Cough Remedy has no
7 1 T. . . . .
nvai. it is, in tact, the only remedy
mat can always be depended upon
ana mat is pleasant and sate to take
Tl i.l t . . .
-mere is not me least danger in
giving it to children, as it contains no
injurious substance. For sale at . 50
cen's per bottle by Aug. T. Fleisch
The name of the springtime term of
fasting is explained by the fact that
our Saxon forefather? called the month
of March 'Lenet-monat'Mength-month
(from the lengthening of the days);
ana wncn tney received Christianity,
and consequently therewith tho an
cient christian custom of fasting tho
fast of Lenct, because of the Lenet-
monat, wherein the most part of this
fasting always felL
Bicklen's Arnica Salve.
The Best Salve in the world for Cuts,
cruises, cores, uicers, bill Kbem, fever
Sores, Tetter, Chapped Hand, Chilblains,
urns, ana ail nxin eruptions, and poti
."vely cures Piles, or no pay required. It
guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction,
or money refunded. Price 25 cents per box.
FOB SALE BYMekbaHaijc.
BALLARD'S SNOW LINIMENT.
This Liniment is different in compoait
ion from any other Liniment on the mar
ket. It is a scientific discovery, which
results in its being the most penetrating
Liniment ever known. There are numer
ous white imitation!:, which may bs recom
mended because thty pay the seller i
greater profit. Beware of those and de
mand Ballard's Snow Liniment It posi
tively cures Rheumatism. Neuralgia, Cats,
Sprains, Braises, Wound, Sciatic and
Inflammatory Rheumatism. Burns. Scalds,
Sore Feet, Contracted Muc!e, Stiff Joints,
Old Sores, Pain in Back, Barb Wire Cuts,
Bore ULest or inroat ami is especially
benefic.al in Paralysis. Sjld by Win.
Will the Earth's) Motion Cease.
Is tho motion of our earth and oth
er planetary bodies perpetual? A su
perficial survey of the field would con
vey the impression that such motion
will continue forever. The earth with
its mass of 8.000.000,000,000.000 tons
for a long time defied all attempts to
detect its loss of speed, but, with tho
friction of the tides continually at
work it was shown that such loss must
take place, and now it is protty cer
tain from calculations of Prof. Adams
and others that the earth loses about
an hour every 16,000 years, and is
slowly but surely coming to a stand
still. The experiments and investi
gations of modern scientists nro prov
ing that Sir Isaao Newton believed
that the motion of all bodies in space
are suffering retardation, and that
their velocity is becoming less and
less and will ultimately aenso altogeth
er. Then the whole planetary system
will fall through space everlasting.
St. Louis Republic.
A MOTHER'S MISTAKE.
Mothers frequently make a mistake in
neglecting the Cough of a child. A Fort
Wayne, Iod.,lady writes: My little daugh
ter 6 years old had a severe Cough but aa
it was noting unusual I thought nothing
of it.and allowed it to run on 4 or 5 weeks,
when it became si obitinate she began
losing flesh. I called in a physician who
treated her three weeks without benefit. A
neighbor insisted upon my trying Ballard's
Horehonnd Syrup; it relieved her from the
first dose and she began gaining flesh
rapidly, when we had used two bottles her
Coogh had entirely disappeared. I would
not be without it. It does not constipate
my children, Ballard's Horehonnd Syrnp
Ls free from Opiates. It's the most sooth
ing Throat and Lung medicine in the
woild. Price 50c and SI 00. Sold by
OvenUeet & Williams. .
PERSONAL AND OTHERWISE.
Stw York World.
The chief issue before the People's
party Just at present appears to be :
Shall Sockless Jerry Simpson drink
Sore throat came to Candidate
Allen's rescue in Massachusetts. Can't
"that tired feeling" help Fassett out
in New York ?
McCIung seems to be a great
name in football circles this year. At
least two college teams have Mc
Clungs they are proud of ; and as for
lungs, tbere never was such a game
to develop them.
Gladstone pays but little atten
tion to doctors and in some respects is
very reckless of bis health. Me is
often seen out of doors without any
overcoat at limes when the wind
seems cold aud raw to a younger man
But he rarely takes cold.
Senator John Sherman's auto
graph collection is kept in a fireproof
vault at Mansbeld. Collectors are
eager for it. Foraker's contains the
most valuable "autograph" to Demo
crats m all Uhio. It is the forged
signature of Uov. Campbell to tbe
The engagement of the Czar's
oldest eon is announced. When bis
oldest shall be married she will have
for one of her wedding gifts the su
perb set of opals the Czarina of Alex
ander IL wore, "just to prove they
weren l unlucky." Perhaps their ill
omen tell on the peasantry.
WORTHY OF A TRIAL.
If you are troubled with rheuma
tism or a lame back, bind on over the
seat of pain a piece of flannel damp
ened with Chambertain's Pain Balm.
You will be surprised at tbe prompt
relief it anords. ou cent bottle for
sale by August T. Fleischman, Drug
gist. NEWSPAPER HUMOR.
The more cufis you give a laun-
drvman the better he likes it Pitts
It is astonishing how debts will
expand after being contracted.
It seems cruel to sue a campaign
liar tor libel, it looks like discoura
ging enterprise. Columbus Post.
Man's wishes are not all wants.
He does not need half as much as he
prays for. Galveston News.
-The Lick telescope shows 100,-
000,000 stars but a lick without a
telescope frequently does as well.
- "No." sighed Buffins. "the doctor
doesn't know a thing absut my case.
pe is regular diagnostic. Wash
Facetious Tourist Is it true that
your canton is full of idiots ' Merry
Swiss .feasant xes, sir, in Bummer,
But they don't stop long. Zumatt.
.Liove is a sickness and marriage
tbe convalescent period, xou have
heard, no doubt, that people are
crosses! when they are getting well.
When it is remembered how
slowly but with crushing effect the
glaciers move, it is not difficult to
believe that the "tooth of time must
be grsnder. Lowell Courier.
MILES' NERVE AND LIVER PILLS
Act on a new principle regulating the
liver, stomach and bowels through the
errea. A new discovery. Dr. Miles'
Pills speedily cure billioosness, bad taste,
torpid Hirer, piles, constipation. TJn-
equaled formen, women, children. Small
est, mildest, surest 1 50 doses, 25 cents.
Samples free, at A. T.
Wm. H. Powell, President
John D. Crawford, Vice-President
Adaai Ittel, Cashier.
Wm. H. Powell, Jr., Aas't Caahia
Citizens' National Bank,
Cash Cnital. Fail ii $101,010.60.
A general basking- basinet
tranracted. Collections reeeif
prompt attention. Liberal at
eesoaatlons to depositors.
W. H. Powell.
J. D. Crawford,
W. T. Hutcbinsoa,
Xi. . Parberrr,
J. W. reruns,
Frank B. Merer.
sarAWYLADY can ret a valnaMc fecret that
Mr. V. M. APP. CO.
118 K. 8th HTKKET. ST. LOUIS. MO.
an. lwsn HUbk uoiStV
DnnU ar Ckutmutt jnuU
m. anus ha ttaa AM. Tak w
V Han, immimimUi. Mmmttmrn.
C 1 1 h mmd ii fliw 1 1 T C-U4I
N.K.FAIRBANK&CO. ST. LOUIS.
Irwttwfch lB mate cktes as vAfe as tie sun
W fiish your writ as sonl ashmai
I CUURETTE soap
M tm mjmyit
Trumbo & Mc Roberts,
116 OSAGE STREET ,
Are sole agents for the world renowned
OVER 1,000,000 IN USE.
Agents for the celebrated "BAKER PRRPTSfiT" Tei, nr: ti.
strongest light weight wire made.
oaru that is licensed, lou are protected against all litigation that threatens
every user of unlicensed wire. The wembt nf
farmers can load their goods without
by electric cars.
Large Stock of General Hardware, Tinware & Cutlery
Remember Tbe Place, Two
THIRD NATIONAL BANK
J. N. Daibt, Praadlaat,
A. P. Moan Vice-Preaideat.
B. H. Moss. , Cashier.
W, H. Yam Waohzb, Teller.
Ca.Ital, - - . . S10O.O00.Of
Sirplu ui niiri-
Yiwed prelt, - 30,OOO.Ot
This Baak dots a general Baakiag Bosi
aets and solicits the aecoaata ei cermora
tioaa, inu aad iadividualt.
Draws tight drafts oa all principal citi
of Earope aad other Foreign couatriis.
J. N. Dalby,
J. H. Merts,
B. H. Motet,
N. H. Gentry,
A. P. Moray,
Chat. W.Mc A timet
F. E. Hoftmaa,
Judge Warn. Boeker
B. H. Mom. Cathier.
FUST NATIONAL BAM,
Paid Up Caoital $250,000
Corner Uhio and Second Sts.
Cya-wa Hewklrk, PreaJtfemt.
J. C. TlMtiBMoa, Catakler.
r. H. dsteather, Asa't Cashier
C. Newkirk, F. H. Guenther,
Jso.T.McClure, J. C. Thompson,
J. K. Uakrett, a. W. WOOD,
E. A. Philips.
tsT'Trsnsacta a general banking busi
ness. Accounts cl banks, bankers, mer
chants and individuals solicited. Prompt
attention given to all business entrusted
The Old Reliable
BT.lUHTIS.lfaL SDCdal attention
f Itrra to all diseases or troubles tn male
namea or Hnrie, Dronjcni aooat d
ana. a wsena orimpropnwwa
coamllea bj milL or ai thm offlct, free of charra.
MTIMMh, Skinful TnatmuitGwmhmU
Board and aaartatnts famlabed to those wbs
6mn personal care. ad V. O. itamp (or cinr
Un.aU. FREE fin NorrcrasDcbnJtr. lost VltaDty.
TBI AL IWcakncss and Decar. sent Oca bt
12 eta. postage. Address letters.
Br.Warc Met. 1 17 M. 8 la Street. St Ltti.Btt
THB OLD DOCTOR'S
V LAMES FAVORITE.
ALWAYS BTTTJaBT.K aad perfectly BATE- Th
aaae ae cmkI by thousands of woman all oTor Ihm
United 8tatea. lntno OLD DOCTUBS prvrate null
praettoe. for 9S yrara. and not a single bad recult.
atoney returned it not as repreacnted- Bend 4
cents ( stamps) tor sealed particulars.
Br. WARS CO., 1 17 N. 8th St. ST, LOWS. HO.
a fc fat vvil do it,
it you met wil rue if.
EVERY STOVE WARRANTED.
The only wire with a diamond pointed
fear of having tbeir teams frightened
Doors North of Market House.
SEDALIA BOILER PIS.
All woik in our line done
promptly by the best skilled
workmen. Satisfaction guar
anteed or no pay. Address
all orders or communications
Sedalia Boiler Works,
410 East Main St Sedalia, Mo.
FORD & SMITH,
THE PLACE TO GO
For first-class dental work. Go to
T. T. MAJOR,
810 Ohio street, 8edalia, Mo. Artificial
. th a specialty. Insure a perfect fit,
like appearance and mechanical ex
rtion. Tetb extracted without pais
with gaa and vitalized air. 3-lSwly
Bank Counters, Tyler System, Perb
able, Unequaled in Styles,
Cost and Finish.
lit rase Cslslatse or Caseins, testa sts,, tsssfeatslla
Cahra. fsia, Two restate Ufrata,
AISO TJMTS JUTBS
Osjee Beaks aad Type
writer Cmblaets. )
Styles. Best and cheap
est on eartn. with great
redaction la prices.
ixe ease aaulssas FMe.
FMsie 11 rU. rJu Ban at
Ms, Caalra. Taelss, te
Casts, CssJsrta, Ucal tlssS
Caslarts, ale,, afesjs la slack.
SsmUI a a suaa la 9r4T
SEXONEKVE tte greet
TnTklsh Bemedy, enret Nerrooa
DebUlty.WakefaiDeaa. TIU1 ;
naosaoo. ixMaes. wcatne
ManhooiL It II Dreamx.Uulcknrat
anil all wasting dlseasea oansod by
Errors of Youth and Excesses,
vhicsi load to constBsptloa, la
sanity and saldde. Fat op In
condensed form to carry la tha
pocket. Price It per box or
comDleto treatment of six boxes
with Written Caaraatee fcrtS.
Sent poet-paid In plain packase to
any atldresa. Circulars free la
plain envelops. All letters private
and confidential. When wrttasfi
"mBBSnSXii MEDICAL ASS'N. Solo Agent
Zot uearDom aa.. t,ni uibu, ils.
FOR 8AT.E IS SEDALIA. MO-
Aug. T. Flelschnunn, Cor. 4th and Ohio SU.
eaehday. Salary or com. SIO camples tree.
Ad. I. StSJAlOJI 0, 1X8 S. 8ti St. 87. ICTO, Sf.
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