Newspaper Page Text
mmiiMi n iniwtw n i f mi m -r ! i u;
, rri.K Kimox a ,
TUSCUMMA, MO.,' THURSDAY, MARCH 31, 1881.
VOL. III. NO. -13.
A VII A HA C TV. II RE TV II.
i The mule Mseincd pensive, h eo
, An It I'.v r-rfi-s h'nue prtt kcl;
i Jimi; wIum iti.-y cmiotip -httrcht
J , ll)rnil itiji iiiiii-kn k-l.
L ctit i-Setc up to s m!H' tiljo,
J il Weh mcwim-l ktitlH purr:
i AUi! sbe.t tvilimi hn rv;litl.
- Xvoi'H - II. Ml all in. mi I lull
Ire ilotr. In pllv, uftri"l titin t
A ! I Int. riitp;
Jit- ri,-. to pt-s it-nutul h'pi niiiw,
fliii-iui-ii.irt"-iiicHt uiel hn:r!
An Julia, ih" tinn'-st fiirtm-r-tio)-,
- h' hint iti im In rtinrt'i.
Ti ' l ris-k l,-siy l. Iiii-ii.-.s biin
' Hi- fiitc-rul wn (irir.
' "M trtfltnir Wfre Ih.-esti-w. wsfeti "
Hi- in-uu fiiini'1:
p Art'! hnmv A-.irH. ,pi:(lrHp' H
' ' 'l.t!jitunht miutiii-r w.til I.
jt-'iiMcr tlf 'It-cent t litntr :
-.- tic w..n L w. nil h illicit! ;
Mr Sh fcr. mm. I kl'-kit mini !' -ti.- l,
,u4 to-'U l,c ttu n"-l lite inii'ki i.
.V. J". Sun.
A I.AK.lllM. ! MMII.V.
Tti. IV. Miiladt W hl. h . mil l Faml
IV tlM4 lr)MH I'lHIIIrM t ITiti I.
tabl-d- IVrl-nlln LmniliCv t ulri Tul.l by
ItH; ffltkhmt. ,
Straight across llii! Delaware from
JitTC, mid hack among the hills which i
ftio para'1-1 wnii th river (or many
Itiitr.s. Ivcs & family concerning whom
tlm strangest stone aro tohl. l'he fa
tlicr mi I iruun nro f.'irriiir-, nml ll live
in . ft liiris,
Hubulantial buiiM. a few ;
tho road to loyleslovvn. ;
Ti Imv Miu nil ciircmio 1,-iiiirlier.-, li.iviiiL'
1) Hlll'cUlU) l( till- Illll-cll S lit till) NIOIllll
fcii'l lhiii.1t wliicli cnilHlt thrill to fzivu
intto apiiaront niRiriun'iii t Htuted
interval)). The malady lint !to:aivd , a radim of a few mile are bo aceus
in the father about ten years nj;u. He tomcd to tho thins that they never
was iiMia.ly a. very )jimt nmu. enjoying ;
dm, but inanile-itiiijr his enio ineni
wiUiout much iioixu. lie a.s Dilated at
the dinner table one day in the rin;
of tho year, mliiifr teadily and not en
j;a2iV in any of tho conversation which
the other member of the family were
carrying on. Suddenly, without nny
rause, ho burnt into a loud lit of laugh
ter o extremely ditfomiit from hi ac
customed laugh that all were attracted
ty it at once,
the reason for
When asked what wan
hi Httddcn outliurst he ;
luotle uo reply, but eotitiuued his merri-
merit. Sonic of tho bovn tlioujrht ho i
had hystiric ami potimled him ou the
btu:K, uni it nut no good. Alter a lew
monieiils he made motions for pencil
' and paper and wrote that he wax unable
to control his risible and asked them to
send for a doctor.
TltK N A TV UK OV THE MAt.APV.
' The rural plivsiciiui came, but could
Rive no remedy that atoppud the laugh
ter. Teal after jmmi! of w hat Hounded
like the heartiest kind ot fun eamo
from him, and nothiug would avail to i
prevent il. Tho doctor finally camo i
to the conclusion that he was tho vie-
tim of a nervous attack, and, leaving a
, nervine, departed. The father eon-!
tinued liiughiux until about sundown,
when he suddenly atopied and fell on
the floor, completely prostrated. Ho
oongrev better, however, ate a hearty
. : "upper and Spent tho evening much as
usual. No signs of a return of the odd
trouble appearing, he went to bed and
' was soon fust asleep. Along about tw.i
t o'clock in the morning, however, his
i wife was awakened by his laughter, and
the :ame symptoms manifested them
selves as ou the afternoon previous.
He kept it up until seven o'clock, laugh
ing loud and strong. At seven
o'clock the noio suddenly ceased
and did not return again until
dinner time. Thus it continued, re
curring each day tdrnrtly after noon
and iu the n'ght about two o'clock, and
has ever since. As the weeks paMied
he grew so accustomed to the disease
that he whs caused very little Ineouven-
1 I. I. fl.. l: I . . . I .
ieiieo by it. Ho did not cet tired out.
as tit liit, anil soon was able to go
C about his work sowing seed and plain
ing corn, digging vegetables ami wa
tering cattle while laughing immoder
ately. He could not talk while under
oue of the spells, but carried a s'ato
anil pencil around with him, after the
- fashion of a deaf and dumb person.
" ' TUB I.AIC.II r Kit SCUKAt'S.
The trouhh was very regular in Its
coming and going and only occasional
ly broke forth at mtlooked-for soa-sons.
Once the old man was taken in church,
. ust w hen the minister wa exhorting
his hearers iu tho most solemn strains,
. and "(Hilled tho ell'ect of the discourse,
besides disturbing thn equilibrium of
.the clergyman. Another time he was
found by one of his neighbors along the
, road, lying beneath a bag of llotir,
laughing at a tvrrilie rate. He has
beeti taken while driving home from
the mill and the suddenness of the
' sounds frightened the horse, causing it
to run away and dump the man and
part of his load out in the road. For
eighteen mouths the father was thuimiy
one of the household alllioted with the
malady. Several of them had com
plained from time to time of an incli-
l nation to join thu father in the laugh.
!htit none of them did so until nearly two
years after he was taken, when Susie,
tho youngest child, suddenly burst into
similar lit during one of her father's
attacks. From that time ou she has
; laughed at about tho same hours her
j fatherdoes. One by ono the remaining
I liioaibera fell yictijns to the strange
roinjiliiinl, until llimo ytmr ;ro thor
wnn hut otn) I;ft frc, tnl j hat was
Churh'. tli oldnst son. J I is lonj ex
rmplhui 11 him to Ix'tifvi) ho would
VM-npo tho cotitn;;ion. Utit ho won mi
t.ik.'ii. null it Is ntl.l ho h'l hii firt nt-lii--.lt
hilu pi'litiniiliij for ihij ti.itid of a
ll.rri."liiir ihiriiMcl. .So frihti-timl wni
tin' lit.lv hy th ijik.mt bch:ivlor f hor
nitor tlmt che rnu from l.u moiii, hhJ
it win vka lii'fDt-n the ptf)icr f.'xplann-lion-i
roulil tniluiMi Iht Ui hv.k him njritin.
i now oho of the family horn, and,
I'vapinj; tho iiuil.ulv, nnvcr niimln the
hitluoiiH ciiiirtiii of lii'itflitur which twitra
l.tv rimtnlM tliroii;li tti' houe or
ifTouinU. ft i" TC'trilrit rat Iht
(ttinri'iit tli.it noli' of tlm nmihboM
ahoulil hnvo oaiiht tho infootion, but
Hiirh U In 'sii. ulth'niirli many of them
iinmie I'onstiuitly with ttmfntnily.
, TI!V1N' to Tnr IT.
I V-vi rytliiii,; io h!o ha bnon ilono to
il'i'vinto or r--inov! tin rnala1.V, but
I without iiTeilibt fffi'rt. sY'veral
! i'tniiii'iit ihysici:iiiH from tho lf:iilin
: ritii'.i havi iNil-l tho hotno ami grown
; oM-o'dinlv intorcMlO'J in tlio rand,
i 'J licv all i yif"H tip nii'lven btillli'il by
! tlm m.ilailv ainl want ono or two of tho
family to jti to the city, wht-ro they
rontant treatment. 1 his
thev ittcaililv n-fitsu to do. Their
l-ci'uliar tronblo, no noticeable and odil,
has Hindu them very sensitive, atnl they
will not travel whero they will
i.-rted to niililiu verutinv and remark.
'I ,ev l'o to i hen h or the store in the
villajre i'los by. and attend soeial
fratherinH occasionally in the ncijrh
borinod in tho eveninfrs, but mly
uuuti" life Ion-' friends. I'ootile within
iniiid it or mention it. Consequently
very few peon!! outsido of the inline-
diale vicinity, and thn physicians who
have attended lliem. are eitii.ant of
the etrciini'tances. l'eoplo passing the
house, rspeciaMy in the summer lime,
have been tilled with curiosity by what
they saw and heard, and have carried
accounts to distant phu'ci. These re
ports are very v;ijrue. for tho pasers
li v have no delimit idea of the matter.
Thev otilv knew that it looked remark-
nblv slranL'e to see a fathranl hid nous
out iu a field plowing mid lowlni; many
rods apart, vet each one laushiUir as
though he liad he.iud the Lveot joke iu
the world. Curious stories are told of
the traveler who went that way. Sev
eral year a'o two young ir.ea came
from' Doylcstown to attend a party at
Krtvinna. a summer resort on ttie Penn
sylvania side, a few miles below here.
It was a warm night and thev did not
start back until late. They drove past
tho house of the laughing family soon
after the regular attack hint begun.
Tho windows were all oocn. and every
sound could bo clearly heard. As the
' young men approached they hoard the
j most unearthly noise their ears had
ever received. It seemed like a perfect
j pandemonium, ami they felt sure they
must have struck the entraneo to tho
i lower regions. The horse took fright
i and nearly run away with them. Coin
! ing to tho conclusion that, at tho least,
the place was: iiauriied, they hurried
home, and the next morning spread the
news. Parties were formed to invest i
galo the matter, but uono of them
solved tho subject until informed by a
man iu the village near at hand as to
the nature of the cuo. They were
urged to remain reticent about the mat
ter, and have done so.
T11F.IU rilKHKNr COSDITKiN.
The years of incessant laughter have
told somewhat on the faces of tho fam
ily, but not so as to bo very noticeable.
Thero are scores of lines tinder the
eves and above, the checks, caused by
the drawimr up of tho skin. Then their
i mouths have become wider, and they
' i . .i i . 1 ...:.. l I... 'I'l...
Keep lueiu t.ioseu wiui t,iiiiiciiiL. .mc?
mot marked result of the disease, how-
ever, is in the voice. The entire fam
ily talk in the same tone, resembling as
near a anything tho voice of an alto
singer. Males and females have tho
same inflection ami intonation. Most
of them have more or less trouble with
their eyes, several having become very
near-sighted. The pupils hll'.o con
tracted and the entire eyeball is dimin
ished in size. This U accounted for
by the contraction of tho eyes while
liiucliiiiL' and the effort "required in
working or reading while undergoing
t , !..(.. 1 .. ... I .. S
an nltacK. verynu e pnysicai niinm
ance is caused tl' laughers. Thev read
and write, sleep and work without any
trouble. The only thin.' they seem un
able to do, whiio attacked, is to cut,
nml that can be readily understood.
Several grandchildren have been born,
and in all but ono instatico they were
taken, soon after birth, with stated at
tacks at the same hours as their par
ents. Ol course thev do not laugh as
the older ones do. tint they crow and
express all tho signs of baby gleo twice
a day and never cry while in that state.
FrencMown (.V. J.) for. t'hUmkliikm
W. C. Milliard, of Titusvllle, I'a.,
has been engaged for I ho last fifteen
years iu perfecting a piece of musical
mechanism which omibinos the work
of a first and second violin mid a llute
in ono performance, and gives to the
violin tho same rungo and facility for
playing as an organ or piano.
llata Cons Front Teeth la Their l'p.
per Jawst '
A ouplo of Third Ward citizen met
each other on tho sidowalk last Monday t
morning as they were starting for their
places of business,' and ono of them,
who resides on VaTi Huron street, asked
the other, a Jackson strisit man, if cows
had any front teeth on their upper Jaw.
The Jackson street matt was a liitlo
astonished at the rpjestioi, as there had
been nothing said about cows, but re
" hy, of cour.a 1'vv have front
leetli ou .thnir uf 'mr 'jami, woMfttl?lyark If
they bsto oil grass if they uatuYlr '
The Van Huron street man said it was
not a question of logic, hut a question
of fact; and if the Jackson at reel man
did not know whether cows had front
teeth on the upper jaw or not, he ought
to say so. "1 did not ask you for your
opinion," he said; "I tvsked U you .
The Jackson street man was a little I
nettled at t his, a.id replied with some
warmth, lie said if lie had a child j
three years old who wotil.1 ask such a j
question as that ho should be afraid the !
child was an idiot. !
' Vou would?"
" 1 certainly should."
"Then," said the Van Iturcn street
man, "as It is sticn a simple question,
of course you can tell mo whether cow
have got front teeth on '2r upper jaws
or whether tlrey have not."
" Why, of course they have."
"1 hey have, eh?"
"I'll bet you ten dollars they
haven't," aid tho Van Buren street
citien. imllms: out a roll of bills, and
peeling off a couple of lives anil shaking j
them at his noignbqr. " l'ut upor shut i
" There is some infernal catch about
this thing," said the other, suspicious- j
ly; "I might have known it, too, the;
minute you asked mo such an infernal :
idiotic question." j
' No catch at all about it," rcpliod
the other, if cows have got front teeth
on their tiper jaws the ten dollars is
yours. If they haven't tho money is
mine. Nothing could bo fairer than
that, could there?"
Hut still the Jackeon street man hesl--tutfd.
" r was barely posrihlc that cow
d d not have any front tse'h on their
upper jaws. Ho remembered, then,
that cows in biting off trass always
threw their noses out want, while horses
nipped it off by jerking their noso in
ward. He was astonished at. how near
ho had tiomi) to boing victimized, but
he did not like to come down. The ;
two were then near the meat market, '
near tho corner of Jackson and Michi
gan streets, and tho Jack-sin street man
whs sure that a butcher would know I
for certain whether or not cows had'
front teeth on their tipper jaws; so he
pushed open the dor aud said to the
"I.inohnn. havo cows got front teeth
on their tipper jaws?"
1nielian was running a skewer
through a roast of beef, but he stopped,
looking up in astonishment, and said:
"Havo cows got front teeth on their
teeth on their upper i
I'pon my word I don't know."
"Yon don't know?" .
"No. You see I buy my beef by tho
quarter a', the Manghter-lioue, and
don't have anything to do with tho
heads. Hut I can find out for you when
1 go over."-
"I wish vou would."
So the Jackson street man closed the !
do.T, ami rejoined his neighbor, and
the tvo walked along without saying a j
word. A milk wagon was seen coming j
up the street, anil it was( resolved to
hail the driver and a-k htm tho ques
tion, as It la popularly supposed that
milkmen aro more or less familiar with
cows. Tho Van Huron street citizen
c, eared his throat ami yelled. "Hollo!"
The milkman reined up, and said:
"(io ahead with your tests. If you
find any water or chalk in that milk I'll
pivo joii tho whole of it."
' The citizen told him to bo calm, as
they had no intention of testing his
milk, but ouly wanted to know if
cows had front teeth ou their upper
Tho milkman looked at them about a
minute and then whipped up his horses
and drove oil', mentioning some kind of
a fool that they were. I'pon Wieon
sin street thev saw another milkman,
delivering milk, and overtaking him
they explained the dispute. Hosmilod
pityingly upon their ignorance, aud
"Of course cows have front teeth on
their upper jaws a driveling idiot
ought to know that much. A cow
would be a handsome-looking object
without any front teeth in her upper
jaw, wouldn't she?'
"I've concluded to take that bet of
' ours," said the Jackson street man to
the other. "Come, now, down with
jour dust- Tut up or shut up."
"Why didn't you do it, then, when.
you had a chance? I never claimed to
know whether a cow had any nppef
teeth on her front law or not; I only
thought I had read so somewhere, and
asked to know if you knew about 'it for
certain, r.ut now that the thing is
settled, thero Is nothing to bet on as 1
"O, of course not," said the Jackson
street man sarcastically; "of course
Just then Mr. Clark, of tho Newhall
House, baoncned slon '. and as the
j milkman picked up his lines and drove
i nfT. the Van Hurii-tret. man..
he Knew anything snout
cows. Mr. ClarK said he mil. having
formerly been a farmer aud a cattle
" Well," said the Van Huron streoto.r,
"do vou know I cot the queerest idea
Into my head this morning about cows
that a man ever had. .Somehow or
other 1 got the idea that cows had no
front teeth on their upper jaw; and I
actually offered to bet ten dollars with
this man that such was the case. ldon"t
soo what possessed me."
"Weil, if you had bet, you would
have won the money," said Mr. Clarlf.
"What!" exclaimed both the citizens
" I say If you had bet you would have
won the money, for cows have no front
teeth on their upper jaws."
"Sweet spirit hear my prayer," said
the Van Huron-street citizen, as ho
brought out his roll and peeled off the
two fives again and shook them at the
Jackson-street man, who turned away
with a sickly smile and said ho could
not always lie pulling out his money!
Ignorance seems to be stalking through
the land liko a Kansas grasshopper on
i con j bun.
The Hoers, and Whirl They Want.
A correspondent asks what the Trans
vaal is, what its inhabitants, tho Boers,
have done, and what the Knglish have
done, and why they want to light about
it. Without entering at this time into
minor details of difference or the later
incidents that have pushed exaspera
tion to hostility we will name the broad
er features of tho controversy. The
Transvaal is a region that includes all
the country to tlio north of the Va il
Kivfr--and hence tho namo -as far as
the Limpopo (or Crocodile) River, and
embraces both sides of thn (joalhlamha
Mountains. It lies between latitude
twenty-two degrees fifteen minutes and
twenty-eight degrees forty minutes
south, and longitude twenty-six. degrees
to thirty-two degrees fifteen minutes
cast. Its area is about oue hundred
and fifteen thousand square miles; and
its population is estimated at threo hun
dred thousand, of whom about one-tonth
Now, certain Dutch Boors who lived
in Cape Colony and Natal became dis-
satisliod with Hnttsli rulo. J hey did
not take kindly to a change which to
the old Hollanders of Manhattan made
so little difference. Like the people
of the Orange Free State they thought
they would like a government of their
own. The Scotch were consoled for
the merging of their nationality by tho
consideration that a Scottish dynasty
was seated ou tho British throne: aud
it was long ago pointed out to llntch
colonists whoso country was ceded to
Kngland that the circumstances of a
))utch Prince having as -ended the Ku
glish throne should reconcile them
selves in a like manner. But the
Boers failed to see the matter in this
light; such comfort they thought
might havo been very wolf for con
temporaneous enjoyment But was of lit
tle worth merely "as a reminiscence.
Thus it was that in IS 10 these dissat
isfied Boers marched, like so many
Hebrews, out of the land of
.i . i- .. .i .... .... . n.. .,.!; ,.-
men llliisil.'! Ullil nci- W)' a m j 'ilium tin
themselves on the further sido of the
Vaal. They deemed this to be froo
territory, aud thought that at least thoy
would only have to contest their footing
with savages. For a long time they
cherished hopes that (ireat Britain
would allow tlietn to enjoy their inde
pendence in peace. But for some
special reasons, apart from her custom
ary lust for territory, Ureat Britain
began to feel otherwiso disposed. Ono
plausible reason given out for interfer
ence was tho fear of a general war be
tween the natives of Africa and the
Kuropean colonists; and, at last, iu
1847, the Transvaal was formally an
nexed to the Cape Colony.
Such, in brief, is an outline of the
events that, have led to the present war.
Kngland wants tho Transvaal, like its
neighbors, Natal and Cape Colony, to
be added to the list ol Imerial posses
sions, ami asserts a claim to the soil
rrior lo tho Boor occupation; and the
loers want their independence. We
have said enough to indicate alike the
validity of their claim to this indepen
dence and also, unfortunately, their
slender chanco of forcibly maintaining
it A'. F. livening Jfost.
One of the simplest remedies for
the epizootic, it is said, is a mixture of
tar and asafirtida - ten drops of which
aro given twice a day In the feed. Be
side this a warm bran mash once a day
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.-
Tho OCdipus . Tyrannus" of
Sophocles Is to lie oled by Harvard
students in tho third 'week in Mav,
Throo performances are to be given.
Lady Florence Dixie, distinguished
as a fearless- and accomplished horse
woman, is going to the Transvaal as
war correspondent for tho London
Prof. Richard A. rroctor. tho emi
nent astronomer and lecturer, it Is w
porteil from St. Josenh. .Mo. , pb"',
in i.'d v. tatiy timt city, a widow,
and will henceforth reside In this coun
Will S. Hayes has written and com
posed about three hundred and sixty
songs, aud there are ten of them that'
had a sale cf two hundred thousand '
each. Mr. Hays Is on tho editorial '
staff of the Louisville (Ky.) Courier- .
Journal. - ......
Mr. Longfellow, the other day, sent
this little verso to tho Columbus (().)
school-children, who celebrated his
If tuxy thotiirht of mine, e'er sun or told.
Hit ever irlven dellirht or oonsolstlnn.
Ye tiavM repttM tn l.nick . V-.ousanii-fold
Hy every friendly ttrii mill .uluttttliMi.
With compliments and good wishes of
H. W. LotcarKi-rxiw.
Mrs. Judith Twombly recently cele
brated her lO-'d birthday at the resi
lience of her son-in-law, Mr. James
Stackpole, a prominent citizen of .
Chelmsford, Mass. Her groat-great-great-
grandson, aged five years, was one
of the guests. She still has possession
of her mental faculties and is con
spicuous for her dovotional employ
Miss Flora Torroy Wagstaff, step
daughter of Judge W. R. Wagstaff of
faola. Kansas, has bccnadmitted to thn
bar and sworn to faithfully discharge
the duties of an attorney-at-law. Miss
Wagstaff is a handsome blonde, very
ladylike and relined in manner, a
bright scholar, and highly accomplished
iu music ami painting. She has reatl
law about two years, and attended the
St. Louis Law School for ono year.
Mr. Mactlahan, the well-known
newspaper correspondent, who wrote
so vividly of the Turco-Hussian wa-,
left a wife and child. He was married
about a year before his death to an ac
complished Russian lady of rank in her
country. Tho widow and child visited
the mother and brothers-in-law at To
ledo, ()., last year. Sho is described as
n handsome brunette, highly educated
and accomplished, though finding the
ways of this country very new and
Joan Louis F.rnest Meissonior can
make a picture that will sell for more
than the work of any other living art
ist. A recent number of tho Magazine
of Art gives a biographical sketch of
this picturesque artist. Ito is now sixty-eight
years old. Meissonior paints a
horse about as perfectly as it is possible
to do. He seems to snare no pains in
getting every detail of his subject. For
instance, ho once had a small railway
built, and he was whirled in a car that
kept alongside a galloping horse so that
he could sketch every movoment of tho
It was a wealthy rhilailelphian who,
being asked on his return from Kuropo,
how he liked tho Bosphorua, replied
that lit didn't eat any, and preferred
the ordinary homo-made sausages.
-A short 1 lino ago a clever article
appeared in tho Siniieenth Ocnturt from
the pen of Mr. Mallock. entitled, "1
Life Worth Living?" The answer to
the conundrum is: " It depends on the
liver." SI. I.ouia Voitl-l)tKiiUi:h. ,
In the year 18H0 America issued
seventy patents to women. And not '
one of these was an indicator to be at
ta.'hed to a bod post to show if there is
a man under tho bed. And vet, think
hovti much getting down on hands and
knees such a thing would save women.
There has been a good deal of bit
ter controversy in New I ork over Sarah
Bernhardt' a exact weight, and one of
those who believes her to bo the cham
pion dramatic light-weight of tho age
asserts that uot long ago at rehearsal
Sarah Introduced the feature of filing
a pistol at the villain of tho piece.
Instead of the usual result, the wad re
mained perfectly stationary while tho
Bernhardt aud the pistol were blown
backwards through the aide scenes.
ban f ranc i-ico lit.
We havo just learned that on tho
afternoon before tho last holiday Col
onel Solon noticed a sign on the door
of an Oil City bank, saying: "Hank will
be closed to-morrow; all paper failing
due then must be paid to-day." The
Colonel rushed wildly into the bank,
saying: "Do you uieuii to say that I
I must pay my note to-day, which falls
duo to-morrow?" "Certainly, sir."
"But 1 haven't a cent of money to-day
and and and well now. I think of
it, 1 haven't any note to pay either."
And tho good Colonel walked away will)
a sigh ol ruef.---rrtc.