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A financial Embarrassment the Cause of Utter Failure. j The colored people had come to town for the usual Saturday afternoon holiday, and a hundred or more were Kitting on the grass in the public park. j I was talking with an old white headed i man about cotton when a young man cama : up and addressed him with: j "Uncle Davis, kin I spoke wid yo' a xninit?" "Kin yo' spoke wid me? What yo' want to spoke wid me 'bout, sah?" "HAS TO' GOT TWO BITS!'" " 'Bout yo'r darter Linda." " 'Bout Linda, eh! Whar am Linda?" tlOber dar, sah." j "Hev vo' bin co'tin wid Linda?" 41 Yes, sah." 4 'Linda's powerful nice gal, she am. Dat gal dun chop out mo cotton dan any man I eber did bee." "Yes, sah." "Hain't no gal round yero dat kin fry bacon an make do pone ckal to Linda." "No, sah." ! "Has yo' dun fell in lub wid Linda, ; young man?" ",Yes sah, I has." "Bin holdin hands?" "Yes, sah." j "Linda bin sighin an lookin foolish?" j 'Y-yes, sah. She dun tolo mo to ax ! yo'." j "Yes, dat's Linda; she wants dooloinan ) to know all 'bout it. Nice gal, Linda am. 1 Powerful gal to chop out cotton an split j wood. Young man, lias yo got fo' bit in i yo'r pocket?" ' "No, sah." "Has yo' got two bits?" "No, sah." "Has yo' got 10 cents to put In my hand?" "No, sah." "Den yo' kin took a walk! I hain't sayin dat I'zc so powerful sot on riches dat ! Linda has got to marry a fo' bit or a two bit man, but I do deelar' dat de percola- j shun of dc situashun won't 'low no young j man dat hasn't got 10 cents to his name to cum deeoratin around ycre to patronize my consent to a marriage! Yes, sah, yo' : took a walk an leave dat sigh in gal to sigh on!" THE BIG SERGEANT. J( While He Was Asleep Death I,ay Within Keaeh. About 10 o'clock in the forenoon thobig i sergeant returned from his trip across the ! creek and lay down on his blankets in the Octolcr sun to have a smoke, and for half ' an hour he kept up a conversation with the three or four of us who were sitting about as we cleaned our guns or mended our clothing. By and by his pipe fell from i his lips, and ho slept. Wo continued to talk, but in lower tones, as is the rule of the camp. He may have slept 0 min- uttcs when I was about to start up. In- ; stinctively or unconsciously, I glanced at the man on the blankets and almost screamed out in terror. Ten feet from his head was a sage bush, with a mat of grass about its roots. A monster rattlesnake had crawled from this hush aud curled it. self up on the blankets directly beside the sergeant's left arm. There was not more than an inch of space between serpent ami arm. Man and ser pent both slept in the sunshine. It was a couple of minutes before I could silently attract the attention of the others, but when that had been accomplished we be gan crawling softly away. Quietly as we moved, the snake was alarmed and reared ' its head and Hashed its tongue, but did nnt eri.nl iti rattles When we were 30" feet away, we coun seled in whispers as to what we should do. Let the big sergeant but move hand or foot and the snake would strike with the swift ness of lightning. A waking man, fully realizing his peril, might gather himself for a sudden roll to the right, but he would not even dare to draw a long breath or move a finger. The other men were across the creek and half a mile away, and the sound of their voices barely reached us. We could think of but one way to do. One of us must creep up on the sergeant's right side, whisper his peril in his ear, and then rest the muzzle of a carbine across his body and blow the snake clear away with the bullet. The big sergeant was a man of iron nerve, but could he be aroused without an alarm? His hat was pulled down over his face till we could only see the point of his chin. To fire e.t the ser pent as he lay coiled up meant peril to the soldier. Our nerves were so shaky that none of us could have been induced to try the shot. It was decided that Private O'Mallon should try to carry out our plan. He pulled off his shoes, stripped off his jacket and belt, and flinging down his hat he grasped a carbine and went creeping over the short grass. The others of us could but wait and hope. If the ser geant slept on, all might be well. If he awoke, he was a lost man. We had no remedy in the camp for the poison which the fangs of that reptile would leave be hind. Only lxJ yards to creep, and yet it seem ed that the man would never finish his journey. He must be doubly careful. A noise which might not reach the serpent's ear might arouse the soldier. To have touch him before whispering in his ear would have been to rouse him up. When O'Mallon finally bent forward, our excite ment was so great that we turned our faces away. "Sergeant!" he whispered after a soft hiss "'sergeant, wake up!" The sergeant moved his right hand to show that he understood. "There's a snake on your blanket!" The hand moved again. "I'm going to rest the gun on your body and blow the life out of him! No need of your jumping up after I fire, Ix-cause he'll be a dead snake!" Once more the hand. It seemed to take the man a long minute to get his carbine in position. When he finally pulled the trigger, the snake was cut in two and blown a distance of 10 feet, but for a couple of minutes the eyes glit tered, the tongue darted in and out, and .the fangs were struck into the grass. The sergeant did not move. We ran to him and uncovered his face. His eyes were open, his jaw down, and the sunburn on his face had been replaced by the pallor of death. We shook him by the hand and congratulated him and sought to arouse him, but he simply looked at us in a won dering, stupid way and at the end of 10 minutes sank down and legan weeping. An hour later he told us that he had scented the snake and knew his danger before we moved to aid him. From that hour and day the big ser geant was as hetpless as a child. They sent him away on furlough, but he came back a wreck and was discharged from the service to die before spring. He had defied death by shot and shell and bullet and ar row a hundred times, but when death came gliding out of the grass and coiled up beside him to sleep the fear of it broke hiiu down and made him a human wreck. M. QUAD. How High Will a Kite Go? It is one of the most difficult undertak ings imaginable to even approximately es timate the height of a kite above the earth. This is on account of the fact that objects floating in the air seem to le far ther away than they really are. It may bo safely said that l.soo feet is the maximum altitude that can possibly be attained by a single kite. A kite Hying at the height mentioned will appear even to a conserva tive observer to be nearly if not quite a half mile above the surface of the earth, but a careful measurement of the string and its angle will quickly prove that it could not have Ixvn more than a fourth of a mile above the ground. Ordinarily a kite will go no higher, even if more string be paid out. This is because the wind depresses the cord and cruises the kite to really recede when it appears to rise. It has Iwn said that it is possible to arrange several kites in such a manner that they will reach a higher altitude than "it is possible to attain with a single kite." In this manner, where three, four, or eveji a dozen kites have tvn used, re- marKaoie neignts nave oeen TCacm-, 2,500 feet having been attained in one in stance. St. Louis Republic. Legal Holidays In Various State. Besides the regular holidays, like Christ mas, New Year's day and Independence day, there are special legal holidays in many states of the Union such, for ex ample, as Decoration day, Arbor day and Labor day. Others of them are Jackson's lay in Louisiana. Mardi Gras in Alabama jind Louisiana. Lincoln's birthday in Illi nois, Lee's birthday in Virginia and Geor gia, Davis' birthday in Florida. Good Fri day in five or six states, Mecklenburg Dec laration day in North Carolina, Admission to the Union day in California and Ne vada, Evacuation day in New York, Thanksgiving day in many of the states and Washington's birthday in nearly all the states. Every month of the year, with the exception of August, has a statutory holiday among its days for some one or the other of the states, but a number of the days arc hardly ever celebrated in these times. New York Sun. The Bear and the T'nihrella. j How much danger is there to the I pound in a wild black bear when you j meet him in his haunts accidentally and i at close quarters? Mrs. C. F. Latham, j wife of mine host at Oak Lodge, on the j Indian river peninsula (Brevard county, j Fla. ), was returning from the beach j alone and armed only with an umbrella, j When just a quarter of a mile from this very porch, site heard the rustling of some animal coming toward her through the saw palmettos. Thinking it must be a raccoon, she quickly picked up a chunk of palmetto wood and held it ready to whack Mr. Coon over the head the instant he emerged. All at once, with a mighty rustling, out stepped a big black bear within six feet of her! The surprise was mutual and profound. Naturally Mrs, Latham was seared, but not out of her wits, and she decided that to run would bo to invite pursuit and possibly attack. She stood her ground and said nothing, and the bear rose on his hind legs to get a better look at her, making two or three feints in her direction with his paws. Feeling that she must do something, Mrs. Latham pointed her umbrella at the bear and quickly opened and closed it two or three times. "Woof!" said the bear. Turning about, he plunged into the palmettos and went crashing away, while the lady ran homeward as 1 fast as she could go. So much for the "savage and aggressive" disposition o'. J the black bear. W. T. Homaday in St. i Nicholas. j Solid Emery Wheels. i In the production of solid emery j wheels the best cement that can be em- , ployed is one that binds the emery to- gether with that degree of strength which will resist the centrifugal strain due to the high spc ed at winch emery; wheels cut best about 5,000 feet speed i per minute. It must not soften by fric tional heat nor glaze nor burst nor be come brittle and break with cold, nor ; must it hold the cutting grains until they are too dull to cut nor release them so readily as to waste away the. wheel too fast. It must be capable of being thoroughly mixed evenly with the grain emery, so that the wheel may not have either hard or soft spots and be out of balance, and must also be capable of being tempered to suit different kinds of metal or work. Great care and skill are required in the matter of se lecting only pure and strong chemicals for these cements. Cassier's Magazine. So broad is the scope of modern char- , ity that in many cases, particularly in Europe, it has taken forms fanciful if not absurd. London has three or four refuges for lost dogs. These establish ments are kept up by In quests and do nations. "Xmas" is often written instead of Christmas, and the authoriity for so doing is that X is simply the initial let ter of the Greek word for Christ. HE WAS A HUSTLER. The Opportunity Was a Golden One, and He Hastened to Grap It. When Major General Schofield went to Keokuk, la., and married one of the belles of Shat town, Miss Kilbonrne, an amusing incident occurred which Ar thur Clarke, business manager of John Drew, the comedian, enjoys telling about. It appears that Mr. Clarke's fa ther is editor and proprietor of Keo kuk's leading paper, The Gate City, and in his counting room he has a particu larly energetic Hebrew, by name Joe Klein. Joseph is a hustler in every sense of the word, and the day is bleak indeed when he gets left. He heard of the approaching wedding of Miss Kil bourne with the distinguished officer, and early on the morning of the date set for the happy event he called at the Kilbourne homestead,' rang the doorbell and inquired for Mrs. Kilbourne, moth er of the bride. He was informed by the servant who answered his ring that Mrs. Kilbourne was very much engaged at the time, but he insisted that he must see her on very important busi ness. In a moment she came half way down the front stairs. She knew Mr. Klein very well, as people always know each other in small towns, and when she saw him at the door she said: "I Ci'ii't see you now, Joe. I'm dress ing for the wedding. Call another time." "But I can't," said Mr. Klein. "I want you to present me to Major Gen eral Schofield. I must meet him." "That is impossible, Joe," said Mrs. Kilbourne. "The general is dressing for the church." But the soldier had overheard the controversy from an up per landing, and rather than create trouble he came down and was duly presented. "General Schofield," began Klein impressively, "do you realize that you are about to take from us one of the fairest flowers we have in Keokuk? Do you know that when she goes hence with you she will long for news of her old neighbors? In order that she maybe really made happy by these tidings I ask you now to place your honored name upon the subscription list of The Gate City, which is the best paper in Iowj. Our rates are 8 for the daily per an num and $l.o0 for the weekly. Think of your young bride. " And there were tears in Klein's voico as he pleaded for recognition. "Mr. Klein," said the general aft r regarding the business manager with undisguised admiration for several min utes: "I do not hesitate to proclaim that you are a wonder. You deserve success. Come in, and we will have a bottle f wine together. I will not subscribe for your daily, but you may put me down for your si. o0 weekly, " and The Week ly Gate City now finds its way from Keokuk to General Sohofiold's house hold with great regularity. Chicago Times. When Adviee Itegins to Get Tiresome. "I've got a horrible headache," said Ber seker. "Had it for three days." "Is that so?" exclaimed Mundoy.with sudden interest. "Well, you just tkip around to a drug store and take" But even as he talked Berseker dropped his head wearily and muttered between his teeth, "That's the three hundred and eighty seventh." Chicago Record. Her French. Mrs. Bongtong (proud mother of the ac complihed girl graduate) I hope, Alice, that you addressed that French count in his native tongue. What did he say in re ply? Alice He apologized and said he was sorry, but he understood nothing but French. Chicago Tribune. He Doenn't Keep Ijte Hoar Now. The Husband (late from the club) I er didn't s'hpect you would be sitting up for me. 'ear. The Wife (cheerfully) I haven't been sit ting up for you, dear. I've just come in myself. New York Press.