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THE WILMINGTON MESSENGER, TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 3, 1903. ( 0 o p i-H :i"K-:-i i iii-iH--:--:":-:-i-:-H"i"H-H-i-H'i : : i i-h-h : : i : if M ODERN FAB BY GEOEGE ADE. i Author of the Girl Proposition. ? 5 'X t-H-r-H i-H : : -m-k h-h-v i i-h-x-i : : I -:-: : i : 11 !::-: - i-v-h-:- :-:-x-:- THE MODERN FABLE OF TWO YOUNG PEOPLE AND TWO PHO TOGRAPHERS AND THE CORRE SPONDENCE SCHOOL OF WOO- V JTiffht. 103, by Robert Howard Russell.) Once there was a lovely Two-Step- who went to a Swell Hop and there soet a Corkerina who had come to visit a School Friend He gavotted a few Lines with the LJiy. They found it very .easy to atch Step together and he did an ex pert Job of Piloting during the Waltz o as not to get her mussed up, and tk consequences was that he made a Grand Impression. "Whenever a Debutter goes away to visit a. School Friend, she always meets some Local Adonis who looks to her to be about M per cent better than the stock of Johnnies in her own Burg. And after a Nice Girl has had a long and prosperous Run on the Home Cir cuit and then begins to curl up on the Edges and show signs of Frost, she will .find it a very wise Shift to try new Territory and the Chances are that she will make a Ten-Strike. To prove that this is no Idle Jest, it ean lie demonstrated that the marry ing Girl usually goes on the Road a while before she closes a Contract. The Two-Stepper could not forget the Girl from Another Town. She pulled ut next Day bur he looked up the Address and sent her the Dance Pro gramme that he had found in his Over coat Pocket. She wrote back that it was Awfully Sweet of him 10 remem ker poor little Me and then she asked one or two Questions. That gave him & Hunch, so he bought a i.ew kind or Writing Paper, said to be the Latest Agony, and he wrote a n'ce Long Let ter in which he told her that she was very easy to look at, a' id that when it tame to picking them ip and setting them down in the Slo v and Dreamy, ehe made all the othe- Girls of his Ac quaintance look like t. Set of Cripples She returned the ' erve with one of these chummy Epi.- es, written on ali sides of the Pa; r, with the P. S crawling up one iargin like a Pea Vine. She chucl -d in a few mu-shy Extracts from t ? Oatmeal School 01 Thought and a d him the Name of lis Favorite P-- t. Her Pace wa, a trifle Swift forHar ry J., who hi derived his Education from the Spo :ing Section of the Daily Papers, but h bought a Lover's Guide and a Dictionary - and decided to stay In. f The size of it was that little Harry had been Harpooned all the way through. He was the original Sweet heart a la Brochette. He carried with him. Nig"ht and Day, a Vision of Her In the S-'OO Ri?T that she had flushed or-. the Night of the Party. It never oc curred to him that she could wear any other Costume. He would close his Eyes and try to hear once again the flulcet and mellifluous Tones of that Voice which, to him, sounded as Good as an Aeolian Harp moved by gentle Eophyrs within a Bower of Orchids costing $7.00 each. Fo they exchanged Photos. Next to the Miniatare painted on Ivory, the Modern Photo is the srlz? Bunk of the Universe. A successful Photographer who has learned the. Tricks and made a slight Btudy of Human Nature can take a Grass Widow of 4S who is troubled with Wild Hairs and other Excess Or naments and by tampering with the Negative he can make her out to look something like Ethel Barrymore. Then she can pend the Picture to her Rela tions who live a long vtay off and they never know the Eifferenc . The Girl stnt Harry a High Art Pan el of herself, in which she was look ing at something In a Tree, and when h gazed at it he had a Palpitation and said. "This is better than 1 thought U was." He told himself that it would be a Pleasure, and a Privilege to walk up to something like that the 1st of cverj Month and hand it the Envelope. He got a clean Shave and put on hi? Other Clothes and went and had him pelf Taken by an Artist who ehaigi?.! ?S.0O a Dozen S4.00 for the Picture? and S1.00 to square his Conscience. This Specialist could take any Sei of Misfit Features and re-arraiisre them Into Work of Art. He put Harry in front of the Bull's-Eye and serooged him around so as to blanket the White Wings as much ag possible and then he lold him to think of Money and look Pleasant. & When the Pictures were delivered Harry realized for the first time that he was a Beautiful Creature. He pent one to the Girl and wrote that it was a bum Likeness and did not do him Justice, and so on. In acknowledging Receipt, she cut out the "Dear Mister" and came right at him with "Dear Friend." which ;ave him such a Stroke of Joy that ke did very little Work that Day. Harry did not have Gumption enough to evolve any deep System of landing a Tid-BIt but he had accidentally hit upon the Cinch Method. So long as Courtship consists of ending idealized Cabinets and ex changing Nice Long Letters, there is but little chance of making Miscues. He never drops in of an Afternoon to nd her in a Blue Wrapper and dry ing her Hair and she never catches tdm smelling of Cigarettes. When it comes down to close Work in c Parlor there is always the Risk f ha. ring Herbert Buttlasky oa hand v I X I LES. J. to make his Party Call. He who tells his Love by U. S. Mail never hears anything about the Third Party. He lives in the sweet Delusion that he has bought up the whole House. Harry' Letters to the Girl and the Girl's Letters to Harry became more and. more on that Order, until at lact they began to burn holes in the Mail Bags. 1 After comparing her Picture with all the Parlor Favorites that he met on his Social Rounds, he realized that she outclassed all other representatives of ner Sex. In her co3y Flat, far away, she had him propped up on the Piano in a Silver-Gilt Frame and featured to beat the Car3. Any one who dropped in to see her was made to understand that he was merely an Understudy, who was being used as a Time-Killer. She used to write to Harry and tell him about her Callers and what Chumps they were and let him draw his own Conclusions as to who va the real white-haired Papa. Finally Harry took an Overdose of Nerve Food and asked her right cut, would she? The answer came back by Wire and the same Day he sent a sealed Express Fackage containing the Ring. After which they began to lay Plans to have a Wedding and become bettei acquainted. To be continued in our Next. MORAL: Absence makes the Heart grow Foolish. ACCIDENT ON THE PURITAN The Cat Fall- Ciive Away an a Sea man Has His Leg Uroken. Washington. January 29. The secre tary of the navy today received a dis patch from Commander Berry, com manding the monitor Puritan, dated Hampton Roads, giving a brief ac count of an accident on board that vessel on Wednesday morning. He savs that the cat falls, which forrr part of the apparatus used in securing the anchor on deck. w?re carried away and that John King, a seaman, who was pulling a strap around the anchor at the time, was carried overboard with the anchor and broke his leg. The .injured man was taken to the hospital at Norfolk and the vessel continued on to Yorktown. , McDuffle's Witch Hazel Foot Healer one of the finest baby powders known. Cures pickly heat and gives instant re fer. 25 cents at R. R. Bellamy's. The Senator from Washington. Olympia, Washn., January 29. Levy Ankeny, the millionaire banker and farmer of Wallawalla, was elected Unit ed States senator in joint session of the legislature today to succeed George Turner. The vote was as follows: Ankeny )4; Harold Preston 9; John T. Wilson 22: W. L. Jones 1; George Turner, democrat 23. The Det Prescription for Malarial. "I tills it'l F-'ver :a a bcttle of Grove' Tasteless Chill Tonic. It Is simply Iron wi quinine io n tasteless form. No no pt Price 60c To Kxeltide Negroest from Voting. Topeka, Kas., January 29. A resolu tion was introduced in the legislature today to amend the election laws so as to exclude all negroes from voting and to lequire ail foreign born people to become naturalized before voting. There is much sentiment in farvor of the resolution and it will cause a hard contest. Rubbing wit!; liriment.s blistering, thenp plicatioii cf i'h sters ; in tact anything that will protluce counter-irritation, is good for exter::;il treatment of Rheumatism, but these ::::' pl- Tv:nelics lo not reach the seat of the i incise nor touch the real cause, and relief is therefore only tcmKrary. Hl!cu?:vVi::i is tli:c to Uric Acid and other :rr:.tn:'.t xum:is in the blood, and as it circulates through the system, these acid poisons are deposited in the muscles. 301ms ana nerves, anu exKsu:e tJ night fcir. cold cait winds, or any sudden change in the weather, will brin oil an attack which may last for a few days or linger on for months. Every battle with Rheittnatisn leaves r '.111 : "'V0'1 u .poorer &&.f'h-HM. condition, while the corroding acids are - -: grad ;:a 1 1 y con sum i n g the oils and fluids that lubricate the muscles and joints, and they becotce stiff and sometimes immovable. Rheumatism, with its sharp, cutting pains, can never be conquered until the aciil blood has bee'i cleansed and puri fied, and all irritating substances 11 eutral ized and filtered out of the system, and nothing does this so promptly and effec tually as S. S. S. Under the purifying and "touic effects of this vegetable rem edy the blood is made pure, the general health is rapidly built '.ip aud the sufferer obtains happy relief from the torturing, nagging pains of Rheumatism. Get rid of Rheu matism before it makes you a ner vous, peevish cripple, or pain- - . r? raciiea invalid.. Write for our special book on Rheuma lism, which will be sent free. Tbe Swift Specific Co., Atlanta, Ga tr w B loin H. Mm A2r LlS OOOoOoOOOoOoOoqoOoOOOOOoooOoOoOoOoOoOoooOOOoOoOoOOOoo o O o O o O o O o O o O o O o O o BOWSER. fPens Mljr Life OoOoOoOoOOOoOoOoOoOoOoOcOoOoOoOoOoc8oOoOoQoOoOoOo0oO Copyright. 1902. by C. B. Lewls.l RS. BOWSER was considera bly surprised the other even ing when Mr. Bowser got out pencil and paper after dinner and settled himself down as If be intended to write a 2.000 word sto ry. She repressed her curiosity until he hod written half a page and then In quired: "Is It the draft of some Important paper you are drawing up?" "Rather important," he replied as be leaned back In his chair and looked up at the ceiling in a vacant way. "It's so important tbat the editor of the Ban ner is willing to pay $50 for It" "But what can it be a story?" "Some people might call it that, but ft will be headed 'The Autobiography THE CALLER WAS LOOKING FOB A FA ill LI NAMED GUEEX. of Mr. Bowser.' It's for the Sunday Is sue and will be accompanied by a life sized portrait of the undersigned." "How queer!" whispered Mrs. Bow ser. "I don't see anything queer about It. In fact, I've wondered that some enter prising journal didn't ask for this verj thing long ago." "But what can there have happened In your life to Interest any one?" she continued. "A hundred things a thousand ten thousand. 1 will read you what I have got written, and perhaps even you will be surprised. Here it Is: " On the night of Mr. Bowser's birth a barn near by was struck by light ning, a horse fell Into a pond and was drowned, the postoilice was robbed, and a carpenter named Jones was murdered in his bed. It will thus be s-en that our hero' Here there was a ring at the front door, and. as the grirl was out, Mr. Bowser answered the bell. The caller M SHE FOUND HIS NECK WAS NOT BROKEN. was looking for a family named Green and was directed to the other end of the block. "That our hero did what?" asked Mrs. Bowser as the historian resumed his seat. "That Is as far as I have got I will now go on and say that one could have safely predicted a life full of stirring adventures from these early incidents. The subject of our sketch was hardly three months old when he was left in his cradle alone for an hour one day. The doors of the house were open, and while the child slept and smiled" "Ting-a-ling-llng." went the bell, and Mr. Bowser answered It to find a wo man on the steps who wanted to know if bis name was Johnson and if he had thrown a beer keg at her boy Rob ert that day. It took him five minutes to get rid of her. and as he returned to the sitting room Mrs. Bowser asked: "Did a bear come In and devour the baby? I hope it won't turn out so." "As I was the baby, and as I am still living, I wasn't devoured. 1 shall fin ish that paragraph by saying that a gypsy entered the bouse to steal me, and he was already carrying me off in his arms when a faithful dog attacked him and defeated his object Then I go on : "'Scarcely three months later the motberwent down cellar one day after jam, leaving the baby sucking its fin gers in the cradle. She was absent for perhaps five minutes, and upon her re turn she was amazed " The bell rang for the third time, and ?! He Sets Out t S I (o Write His I Autobiogra- o ? phy For a. o Paper, but o I Ends With g 2L Fight & Mr. Bowser was asked by a stranger if he was the man who kept pug dogs for sale and what a pug with a twist in hii tail was worth. The reply was so ful of exclamation points and plain Eng lish words that the pug dog hunter held his breath till he got out of the yard and around the corner. "By thunder, but have I got to go out into the woods to write?" growled Mr Bowser as he banged the door shut. "You left off at where the mother re turned and was amazed," replied Mrs. Bowser, "and I've been wondering if the baby had swallowed the stove han dle or anything." "Is that meant for sarcasm?" "No; of course not, Don't keep me in suspense." "Well. I shall relate that the baby was found on the other side of the i room, having climbed out of its cradle and walked. Pretty good, wasn't it, for a kid of six months?" "It doesn't seem possible." Terhaps not, but It was so. From there I go on: At the age of one year this wonderful child could walk, talk and sing and was the wonder of the neighborhood. He was hardly a year and a half old when he and his sister were attacked by a large blacksnaka as they were playing In the yard one day. The sister screamed in terror and was helpless, but the young hero' " It was that bell again, and Mr. Bow ser went to the door and found a sec ond woman that is, it was the first woman with a different bonnet on. She had returned to ask if his name wasn't Schermerhorn and If he wasn't the party who got her husband drunk and then robbed him of a Waterbury watch. She was sent away only half convinced to the contrary, and Mrs. Bowser was waiting to say: Tlease hurry up. I am dying to hear what the young hero did." " 'He grabbed up a hatchet and brained the serpent' and by the beard of Captain Kidd if any one else gets me to that door tonight I'll brain him." "Does a serpent have brains?" "Certainly. Every living thing but women has them. Now keep quiet, and let me go on: At the age of two years young Bowser heard his father talking of a gang of horse thieves that had come into the neighborhood and were supposed to be lurking in a certain piece of woods. The child said nothing to his parent, but made up his mind to visit the woods and capture the gang single handed. One must smile at the idea, but let us wait for results. No sooner had night descended than the heroic youngster, in whose veins must flow the blood of a Bayard, armed him self with the family butcher knife and slipped out of doors and started for the place mentioned. It was a dark, rainy night nnd the distance threr miles and the road a lonely one, but the undaunted lad kept on and final ly' "- That bell for the fifth time! Mr. T Bowser clinched his teeth together as he rose up to trot down the hall. "Don't don't hurt anybody," pleaded Mrs. Bowser. "But I will! I'll annihilate whoever I find there and toss bis dead body over the fence!" Mrs. Bowser heard the door open, hot words pass, a struggle and a fall, and by tbe time she reached it Mr. ! Bowser lay on his back on the floor. with his legs doubled up under him. She lifted his head and found his neck was not broken. She straightened out bis legs and found tbe knee hinges all right Then she returned to the sitting room to pick up the pencil and write: "Owing to the fact that Mr. Bowser has been struck on the jaw at his own door by a would be assassin and is still wondering where he is at as this paper goes to press we must cut this autobi ography short and till up the space in tended for it with Reuben's hair dye, put up in twenty-five cent fifty cent and one dollar bottles. None genuine unless it smells like stale eggs. Buy at once, and take no other." M. QUID. Donbtingr Dennis. Judy Will ye give me yer promise, Denbis, that ye'll love me fcriver? Dennis-Sure, an' Oi'd like to do that same, Judy, but Oi'm hardly of the opinion that Oi'll In slit as long as that. Richmond Dispatch. So Ywd It may be from overwork, btrt the chances are its from an in active LIVER. w With a well conducted LIVER one can do mountains of labci without fatigue. It adds a hundred percent tc ones earning capacity. it can be kept sa fcealthful actio: by, and only by TAKH NO SUBSTITUTE. PROBABLE MUTINY AT SEA Different Tales Told by Survivors f tbe llritinh Dark Veronica. Liverpool, January 29. The British steamer Brunswick, Captain Brown, from Maraham, Brazil via Funchal, Island of Madeira, arrived here today and landed five survivors of the British bark Veronica, Captain Shaw, from Ship Island, Miss., October 6th from Montevideo who were pick 3d up at sea by the Brunswick before arriving at Funchal. The men reported that the Veronica was burned at sea December 20th, but the police detained four of them on uspicion of having mutinied and mur- lered Captain Shaw and .even of the ;rew of the Veronica, after which thy re alleged to have set Are to the ship. Hie ccok of the Veronica, a colored nan, who was among those who were eFcued by the Brunswick, made a -tatement to Captain Brown which caused him to cable to Scotland Yard. When questioned here, the four sea- nen said the Veronica was abandoned :ecau?e she was on fire. They add?d 'hat the chi?f officer and a seaman Med on board of her, that Captain 3haw and some of the crew left in on- :oat, and that they (tne men brought lere by the Brunswick) left the bark 'n another boat and succeeded in -eaching Cajucira island December ?5th, in a starving condition, after Irifting for five days, during w.lieh :hey subsisted on eleven biscuits and 1 small barrel of water. Three diys ater the men were picked up by the LSrunswlck. The cook, however, asserts that the nen, led by the boatswain, a German, nutinied and murdered the capt in. hief oflicer and others, ana threatened .o kill him if he betrayed rhem. After an investigation the four sa n?n of the Veronica wer? formally harged with murdering seven of their hipmates. Three of the men in cus ody are Germans. The fourth is an Ymeriean, William Smith, who shipped "it a Mississippi port. DEPARTMENT OF COMMERCE Rill to be a Snbjeet of Conference BetTveen Senate and Honne. Washington, January 29. The senate committee on commerce heard the re port of the sub-committee appointed to analyze the department of com merce bill, as it passed the house and make suggestions as to what, if any, amendments should be made to the measure, but decided to report the bill back to the senate, without amend ments and ask for a conference with the house. Accordingly after the sen ite convened, the bill was thus report ed by Senator Hanna and the senate ordered a conference with Senators Hanna, Nelson and Clay as conferees m the part of the senate. The senators appointed to represent the senate in the conference are the men who have acted as the sub-committee and their efforts will be direct d toward securing amendments along the line recommended by the sub-committee. The principal amendments re ates to the provision authorizing the oresident to transfer the Inter-State Commerce commission to the postofhee lepartment and the amendment for a oureau of corporations inserted by the louse. The trust provision constitutes section 6 of the house bill, and the sen ite committee will ask for a modifica tion of that provision, which will direct the corporation bureau to secure all Jbtainable information concerning cor porations and which will authorize th publicity of such information at the iiscretion of the president. The committee also adheres to the opposition to the inclusion of the Inter state Commerce Commission in the new department. City Marshal Bovrman Shot from the Street. Punta Gorda, Fla., January 29. J. Bowman, city marshal, while sitting in his front room tonight, was shot ty in unknown party from the street. Nine buckshot entered his head. He died instantly. He leaves a widow and four children. Ml Stuffed Up That's the condition of many sufferers from catarrh, especially in the morning. Great difficulty is experienced in clear ing the head and throat. No wonder catarrh causes headache, impairs the taste, smell and hearing, pollutes the breath, deranges the stom ach and affects the appetite. To cure catarrh, treatment must be constitutional alterative and tonic. I was afflicted with catarrh. I took medicines of diilerent kinds, givin? each a fair trial; but gradually grew worse until I could hardly hear, taste or eniell. I then concluded to try Hood's Sarsaparilla, and after taking five bottles I was cured and have not had any return of tbe disease since." Ecgexe Forbes, Lebanon, Kan. Hood's Sarsaparilla Cures catarrh it eoothes and strength ens the mucous membrane and builds up the trhole Bystem. IP R E B MINORITY ANTI-TRUST BILL An Amendment to Make the Meat nre Applicable to Existing Ci jporations Other Amendments. Washington, January 29. A min ority report was submitted to the house today by the democratic mem bers of the house judiciary committee on the anti-trust bill recently reported by the committee. The views of the minority are submitted at considerable length. They purpose an amendment which will make the bill applicable in its operations to existing corporations as well as to those organized in tn future and will deny all corporations violating the Sherman anti-trust law th use of the mails, the telegraph and telephone system, as well as the other facilities of inter-state commerce spec ified in the bill reported. Another amendment proposed to make watered stock ground for declaring a corpora tion bankrupt. Still another amend ment provides that every corporation engaged in inter-state commerce wher ever organized shall be subject to the jurisdiction of the state In which It may operate. Provision is made by the minority for the Imposition of a tax on all corporatiens with a capital In excess of $200,000. In additions to Imposing a fine where common car riers knowingly transport the goods of a corporation violating the anti-trust law provision Is made by the minority for summary seizure and condemna tion of such goods. Finally the min ority proposes an amendment putting on the free list certain articles manu factured of steel, agricultural imple ments, paper and pulp for the manu facture of paper, window and plate glass, salt and other articles. J UdCDS SABM1V SiE'd r.D. $d &l EXPERTS IN MENTAL DISEASE Hypnotism as n Healing: Power Has Not Mncli Vnlne. Berlin, January 29. The commission of experts in mental diseases, appoint ed by the ministry of education to in vestigate the healing value of hypno tism reports that it is essentially worthless. The commission, which is composed of Prof Mendel and Doctors Gock. Muntor and Aschenborn. was appointed during the faith healing ex citement here a year ago. The report declares hypnotism cannot produce or ganic changes nor cure eplepsy nor hysteria, but it can be used helpfully in some instances by removing symp toms through suggestion. No good physicians would leave out of account the influence of suggestion upon pa tients; but hypnotic suggestion may intensify disease when laymen apply it who do not know when io use It and when not to do so. The influence oT hypnotic suggestion diminishes in proportion to popular knowledge of it. It is most powerful when regarded by 1 subject as marvellous and superna tural. The commission also notes that hypnotism is less used than formerly. McDuffle's Tasteless Chill Cure will build up broken down systems and nake the blood rich and health, certaia ,-ure for chills, guaranteed or your . 'orey refunded, 50 cents at R. Tl " lau.y c MINISTER PRINETTE ILL While Addressing; the King He 1 Attacked by 1'aralysls on the Hixht Side. Rome. January 23. Foregin Minister Prinetti had an attack of paralysis of the right side while being received in audience by ihe king today. Ho vus removed to his home in a serious condition. The ministers were holding their semi-weekly conference with the king zt the quirinal. when Signor Prinetti, who was addressing his majesty, sud denly threw up his arms, staggered and would have fallen but for the fact that he war, caught by his colleagues. The incident caused grat excitement. The king rang for assistance and Min ister of Commerce Bacelli. who I3 a physician, was able to do what was immediately necessary. Dr. MazzonI is attending Signor Prinetti. who. al-. though unable to speak, retains full consciousness. The minioWf; wife who was fox hunting when :-h" heard of her husband's illness, galloped home at break-neck SDeed. One Hundred Dollars m Box. Is the value H. A. Tisdale. Summerton, S. C, places on DeWItt's Witch Hazel Salve. He says: "I had the piles for 20 years. I tried many doctors and n, -dl-cines. but all failed except Lkvv;u' Witch Hazel Salve. It cured m. It Is a combination of the healing rro,-.rtles of Witch Hazel with antiseptic and emollients; relieves and permanently cures blind, bleedinsr itching and pro truding piles, sores, cuts, bruises, ecze ma, salt rheum and all skin diseases. R. R. Bellamy. ENGINEER DAVIS DEAD Today Set Aside for Monrnlnff Burial of the Victims of tho Wreck;. Plainfield. X. J., January 29. Engi neer James H. Davis, of the Philadel phia and Reading express train which ran into the Easton express on the Jersey Central near Graceland Tuesday night, died in the Muhlenberg hospital today. The other victims of the wreck -who are in the hospital are reported to be doing as well as could be expected, but it is feared several may not recover. The body of one victim of the acci dent has not yet been identified. Her ald LaBoyoceaux, of Plainfield, and Charles S. Dalley, an insurance broker of Whitehouse, X. J., who were report ed missing have been found, uninjured. Mayor Jenkins, of Plainfield, andj Mayor Smalley, of North Plainfield, will issue proclamations setting aside tomorrow as a day of sorrow. Most of the victims will be buried tomorrow. General Booth In Washington. Washington, January 29. General William Booth the head of the Salva tion Army, addressed a large audience tonight at the first Methodist church. During the day a reception was held. The party will leave for Dallas. Texas tomorrow.