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Club A SERMON ON GOOD ROADS. Maybe the road question ain't none of my business. Then, by granny, I H just flinder away and talk about it. anyhow. Strikes me that every feller who can ride, walk, hop or crawl ought to take some interest in the road . ques tion. You don't have to own a thousand dollar gasoline chug wagon with a voice like many thunders and an odojr like a tan yard in order .to be interested in good roads., , don't realize that he is -losing If you are the principal stock- enough every day-to pay his part holder in a yoke ot bull calves of the tax for a year. Poor fool! and a five dollar wagon loaded Now, gentlemen, I ain't worth with three cull crossties : and much, and the only vehicle that mired up to the top bolster, in a depends on me for axle-grease is mud-hole, you ought to cut'your a sway-backed wheelbarrow, but bulls loose and ride one of them I am willing arid anxious to go into town, waving yur last my part on good roads any day. year' 3 hat and yelling hurrah for Page Three "Rates! THE SPRING FEVER. In. Clubs of Five, !5c a Year. The price of jingle subscriptions to The Fool-Killer is- 25 cents a year, but if you will get several of your friends to go in with you and send in a club of five or more at one time, you can all getNthe paper at' 15 cents a year. The Fool-Killer is creating great excitement wherever it is intro duced, and it now goes into every State in ! the Union. Join the army of ( club-raisers. Do it now. Address: . , ' , THE FOOL-KILLER, MORAYIAN FALLS, Ji. C. good roads! And even if you possess nothing in this world but your mammy's match-hosses and have to go as bare-footed as , a shoemaker's wife, there ain't no use to slop around in the sour A KANSAS CUR. The last cyclone that passed over Kansas dropped something at Great Bend and never went back to, get it: Didn't even have mud and get 10,000 John Rocky manners enougn to cover it up. WVwnrms tn hnrW mmlpf. Ana S0 ne ing got UP ana holes in your whitleather heels introduced itself to the people of and climbing up inside of your ea aS V' inel legs like an army of Taft Demo- a.u feea tnat ne was a our. crats going to hog-heaven. If I was a bare-footed nigger and had to make my living by running foot-races with a one eyed muley steer, hanged if I all right enough, even if he didn't know how to spell his own name. Then one night this measley Cur broke into a printing office, ate 200 pounds of type arid drank wouldn't want good roads to run a bufe of " and. gave birth on. Dirt is a good thing if it is a book, which he called Cur's good clean dirt and rich enough i .0iC0. . , a twn- T?t Now when. it -comes to discov- oh! deliver me from mud! Ihave fnng , TnP' thIS ansf .i,v,oK.,flp.:om-irthisawnoie team, wny, .winm- . . , tbus,. De Soto. Cook, Peary. J ' . . " I A .-JA , A H 4-1. - 4-J? " w AAA VI W AAA 'W A, W "V A W V V A A I k . ever. I live five miles from the coul?n 1 hold h!m a W nilnH nnH Hnrmcr nil thi, had to give you an idea what Cur has winter tW W w , it. , "discovered," just let me pull V A. JVWW -WW . n "I TJ.J.1 J? mud-hole between here and the , , sj-pyer U1, m uuiue ui depot. But the blamed thing "'aspnemy ana give you a smeii: reached all the way. A four- horse team goes straining through the mud with about half as much as a week-old calf could pull on geod roads, while the fool driver wades along at one side and whips and cusses. If he had a This little Educator is distributed by the Church of Humanity to " intro duce to all people Cur's Great Discov eries in Nature that the universe con tains no real God, that man contains no soul, and that life is ended forever in each person at death. ; Thaft al Gods, Saviours, Souls, Saints, Devils Sniriis. Anp-els. Hftavpn. TTell. fttn. good macadam or sand-clay road are purely, mythical, having no' rea he could take one of his mules existence whatever in Nature.';' and haul four times ' more than Suffering Moses! Howling torn- tney all pull,, and do it with four cats! And the ghosts of all the times the ease and satisfaction, sainted prophets! But don't that lhe average wagoner could make just about blow the packing out more clear money in one day of your think-box? The idea of man he now makes in a month, one rjoor little measlev. isrnorant. But the poor idiot 'neyer thinks conceited runt of a two-le2:red . i . . , - ... . . . .... ..,.,. . . . . aoout that. If you mention . a jackass trying to set his little tax for building good roads, he nothingness up against the' Cre will put up a pitiful mouth and ator of the universe and the wis- say, 'Oh, our taxes are so heavy dom of all the ages! It does beat aires.dy, we just couldn't stand a bobtail Yet every." little' while yoad tax!" And then he will some bow-legged bantam will rise larrup his bone-piles and; tug on up in 'the face of - reason and through the mud, -thinking he common 'sense, in the, face ; of has put up a fifood argument. He God and all His armvnf -witness-.' Yes, I have it, but it is not the kind that makes me want to lie and sleep in the sun, but that va- riety that puts springs in my heels and joy t in my heart. ' ' In my imagination I am a plow boy again, and as I turn the sweet odorecr earth and listen to the birds trilling all around me, my soul is very glad. No wonder poets have; ever painted their paradise as being one eternal ; spring; and artists, caught the-spirit of the green hills and blooming vales of springtime with their brushes and transferred - them to canvas! ' It is the season RING RULE." es, and announce that he has discovered' ' that God does not exist. It is utterly useless to try to reason: with such crazy crea tures. All we can do is to be sorry for them. They are like the 0f the vear that tvnifips Wi in ll iiue minnow tnac asKea. , the its fflorv. It is th timp tw tKo whale where the ocean ,was, and youthful John likes to m wit.h K? the fool thing was infocean all vfarv Jan down tn ti,P the time. ' r tVio I nnrlmn- UrnU nA 4- palpitating breast in tune with his surroundings so that he can .The day of ring rule in govern- pour out llls inward longings to mental affairs is right now kick- nis sweetneart. it is the time ing the bucket in its last death ag- whei the Picnic Pary goes forth ony. Ever since I was old enough to dine on stale, crackers, cold to distinguish between a lighted rooster-leg and red -ants. lamp and a brush heap afire I have observed that a little clique The first issue of The Fool- of political nimcompoops have Killer, a little over two years ago, been running everything from was carried to the postoflice in a my, own precinct up to the govern- 25-pound flour sack, and the sack ment of the United States. But was not: half full. This present it appears that the day of the issue will require ;about fifty of -ring rulers" is wellnigh spent,' Uncle Sam's-big mail sacks to and that the vhole people are carry Jt. Growing? Well, just about to be given a front seat in a teeny-weeny bit. the band wagon. Just a very short time ago the newfangled ADVERTISEMENTS. doctrine of the "initiative, refer endum and recall" gagged the SOUTHERN FARMS. Republicans and Democrats to If you own a farm anywhere in the the puking point, but' now listen South and will sell it cheaply, we can at 'em proclaiming it from the who will buy it from you direct. Stump and incorporating it in l yu a home-seeker and want ii i Ti)r ' r. .1- . to buy a farm cheaply anywhere, m their platforms. Mr. bocialist, the South, we can put you in touch , li you uon i iook out, me two oiu " rr , ; ' ; v. t- At ... r , - actly what you want direct. We will parties Will SOOn have, all your pay your railroad or boat fare to any thunder and lightning, and you Southern f aim you purchase through mi i 1 .i 5 i . us. Write us to-day, telhrg us your will be left with nothing but a ,wants. red flag to hold. - Just so sure as Southern Homescekers' Bureau, the people, the masses, get a full Box 118, , Wilkesboro, N. C. say-so in the way our government ( it gives me pleasure to state that should be administered, you may jg OTScrSS,d.Sdta look for more dead political "tit- hiimto be strictly all right. l am sure W Povfcr. nctca be will carry out in good faith any ,U"1C Wiu vmvvx x,v agi;eonient he , enters into. J. L. And that's what's going to hap- Pearson, Editor Fccl-Killer. ) , pen. You may as well try to dam the current of the mighty Missis- THE LIFE OF NAOMI WISE qirmi' fl to kPPn the infernal A true story of the wrongs of a beautiful bippi as. 10 Keep Liie niieiiiai gjrl how ghe was killed by Jonathaa "ring-rule" TaSCalS from getting Lewis in Randolph county, North Carolina, thp Hmbhino- that has bfiftn due about one hundred years go A masterpiece , . . 0 i oi passionate ana vnrimng luteresu we iu- them IOr, lOI these many years. elude the song ol "Naomi Wise" with ,the book which js neatly pniitta ana substantia i- lxr Krn r-irJ oil tpnt. nnstriflifl for In the free-for-all fight with e: p. newsum a co., dept. 65, king, n. c. legalized srand rascality, old lady Justice has got one whole side of , THE BAYONET- her face knocked off and don't The paper that prints what -it think?, .look, like herself any more. and is not afraid to think as it pleas- iarnr' es. It is sharp at both ends and . ' r ;u k ooo a sticky in the middle. It catches 'em "uiu Mw v. on ootn sides ana m me imuuie wo. hound pup away from a Slaugh- n electric shock in every line for ter Den as to try to keep one of fools thieves and rascals. 25c a year 1, ' A ' lrrrvaA Wvo 6 months 15c. LETCHER O. BAX- those old bench-legged booze- LEY Chief Point-Grinder, Clanton, hnstprs from likker. . ' ' ' Alabama.