Corvallis gazette. [volume], July 27, 1900, Image 4

About Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909

Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR

                
MINES AND MINING.
Iteu U 1th New Ideas Needed to Pro
pect Eastern Oregon Min
eral Fields.
.Tames Duckworth, one of the original
locators of the E. and E. mine, in
Cracker creek district, near Sumpter,
Oregon, and one of the best informed
men in the camp, says that what this
country needs is a thorough prospecting
by men with new ideas. The old
timers always look for a certain kind
of float, and are particular about the
formation. Now hardly a week passes
without some find being made on hill
sides that have been run over for years
by the old timers and pronounced
worthless.
Mr. Duckworth visited a property at
the foot of the mountain on the Sump-ter-(iranite
wagon road, and found Ben
Yeager and his partner, Montana min
ing men, working on a 200 -foot ledge
that he has been over many times and
considered worthless. Development
shows that the ledge is rilled with
strata of quartz of a bluish appearance,
and all of it pans gold. A number of
assays have been made, giving $3 to
f 13. The ledge can be traced for over
two miles, from one side of the moun
tain to the other, and it prospects
throughout. At present a 25-foot shaft
is being sunk, from which a cross cut
will be run to determine if the values
go down. If favorable results shall
be obtained, machinery will be secured
and a shaft sunk 300 to 400 feet.
There is such a large body of ore that,
with present values, $3 to $4 per ton,
the property is another Tread well.
Facilities for mining and milling are
excellent. At the head of Bull Run
creek, running alongside of this ledge,
in early days there was placer mining.
There was little wash gravel in the
creek bed, and the diggings frequently
dipped to the hillside, where no gravel
was found, but rich dirt. At thai
time it was wondered where the gold
came from, and no one ever thought
the big dike was guilty, but this recenl
discovery is almost proof positive that
the placer gold came from the dike.
A MOUNTAIN OF QUARTZ.
Remarkable Formation in the Blue
I'.iier District.
. ie Blue river, Oregon, district ii
rapidly forging to the front, and is
now enjoying an era of activity but
little dreamed of a year or two ago.
Extensive develpment work is being
done, aand lmost without exception
claims are proving valuable. The sta
bility of the district has been conclu
sively proved, and as a result prospec
tors have flocked in here this spiing by
the hundreds. Mining capital has
been attracted, and one mill is in suc
cessful operation and several more are
in course of construction. New discov
eries are being made in almost every
direction; most notable among which
are the discoveries on the Calapooia
and McKenzie rivers, which show ex
tremely rich ore, and the immense
mountain of quartz four miles np Blue
river. This mountain of quartz is a
remarkable formation, and is probably
unparalleled in mining discoveries.
The mountain is 1,270 feet high, and
appears to be nearly all quartz. At
the top several cliffs of solid quartz
project for a hundred feet or more
above the surface, while veins of ore
crop out in all directions. The ore as
savs from $3.50 to $12 per ton.
The Lucky Boy mine has been com
pelled to shut down five stamps, owing
to shortage of water,- since the dry
season set in. The remaining five
stamps are kept going day and night.
The company has the machinery for a
sawmill on the ground, and, as soon as
it can be set up, lumber will be sawed
and a flume constructed which will
furnish plenty of water for operating
all of the stamps.
Jones & Co. have the foundation laid
for a sawmill at the Blue river bridge,
and already have a number of logs
ready to saw. The machinery for the
mill is expected to arrive in a short
time. The mill will be situated at the
new Blue Hiver city townsite, and is
intended to supply the local market.
It will be operated by steam power,
and will have a capacity ot 10,000 feet
per day.
Stampede to Stewart River.
The steamer Danube, which recently
arrived at Victoria, B. C, brings news
of a rich strike on the headwaters ol
Stewart river, 400 miles from Dawson.
A stampede is on, boats going up in a
continuous string. At White Horse a
whisky famine prevails. Saloons are
licensed, but cannot get permits to
bring in liquor. The police are watch
ing the boundary for smugglers, and
have made many seizures.
ortliwegt Notes.
A cold storage warehouse is in conrse
of construction at Troy, Idaho.
A hay warehouse, 32x70 feet, 16
feet high is being built at Palouse,
Wash.
King county is said to furnish one
fourth the inmates of the Walla Walla
penitentiary.
Walla Walla boasts of shipping 50
carloads of fruit and vegetables the
past two weeks.
Apple scab is reported among the
trees in the vicinity of Moscow, jaarju,
especially in the American Bidge dis
trict. Deer are reported to be plentiful in
Coos county this season. They are
frequently seen in bands of seven or
eight.
Washington railroads are following
a rule that no packages weighing more
than 250 pounds will be accepted oi
checked as baggage.
Deposits in Walla Walla's banks
reach $1,400,000; in the Spokane
banks $5,000,000. Other Eastern
Washington centers are similarly well
supplied with money.
The new wool scouring mill at The
Dalles, Or., reports a rush of work.
A firm at Eugene, Or., recently en
gaged in the business of curing meats.
The manager says he will soon begin to
bny all pork products that may be of
ered, and will sell direct to retailers.
W. O. Owen, a government inspec
tor, is in Wallowa county, Or., to ex
amine some recent surveys. He ia ac
companied by men from Wyoming and
South Dakota. At Elgin thay bought
a. wagon, four horse team and pack
outfit, and employed a cook for their
trip.
KEYNOTE OF THE TRADE.
the Improved Crop Conditions are the
Great Factors. , '
Bradstreet'8 says: improved crop
conditions furnish the keynote of the
trade and price movement. As a re
sult of them nearly all staple agricul
tural products aie lower in price, and
at the same time a perceptible livening
up of demand for fall delivery is noted
in the West, Northwest and South.
The beginning of fail trade is conse
quently more clearly visible in the sec
tions mentioned, while at the East
the markets are slow to experience this
improvement and are consequently rea
sonably dull. Bank clearings as yet
fail to reflect ny perceptible improve
ment in distribution, and railway earn
ings, though of large volume, are, ow
ing to comparisons being made with
exceptionally good results last year,
showing less notable increases both in
gross and net returns.
Hog products have gone lower with
corn, as has also wheat, in which con
tinued liquidation has been noted, with
the result ot inducing partial returns of
the export inquiry banished from the
markets by the recent heavy rise.
Iron and steel prices are evidently
scraping the bottom, if reports from
leading centers of cost of raw material
and wages are correct. Soft coal is
going abroad too, a cargo leaving for
London shortly.
Tin is cornered locally and higher
on the week, while copper is finer.
An encouraging feature of the wool
market is the rather better inquiry foi
raw wool at Boston, hut manufacturing
Lwill not apparently do much until the
light weight season opens.
Wheat, including flour shipments,
for the week, aggregate 3.029,381 bush
els against 2,829,910 bushels last week.
Business failures for the week num
ber 202 against 221 last week.
Canadian failures for the week num
ber 26 as compared with 19 in thir
week a year ago.
PACIFIC COAST TRADE.
W
Seattle Markets.
Onions, new, lJac
Lettuce, hot house, $1 per crate.
Potatoes, new. 80c.
Beets, per sack, 85c$l.
Turnips, per sack, 75c.
Carrots, per sack, $1.00
Parsnips, per sack, 5075c.
Cauliflower, native, 75c.
Cncum bers 40 50c.
Cabbage, native and California,
$1.00 1.25 per 100 pounds.
Tomatoes $ 1.50.
Butter Creamery, 23c; Eastern 22c;
dairy, 1722c; ranch, 1517c pound.
EggB 24c.
Cheese 12c.
Poultry 14c; dressed, 14 15c;
spring, $3.50.
Hay Pnget Sound timothy, $11.00
12.00; choice Eastern Washington
timothy, $19.00.
Corn Whole, $23.00; cracked, $25;
feed meal, $25.
Barley Rolled or ground, per ton,
$20.
Flour Patent, per barrel, $3.50;
blended straights, $3.25; California,
$3.25; buckwheat flour, $6.00; gra
ham, per barrel, $3.00; whole wheal
flour, $3.00; rye flour, $3.804.00.
Millstuffs Bran, per ton, $12.00:
short?-, per ton, $14.00.
Feed Chopped feed, $19.00 per ton
middlings, per ton, $20; oil cake meal,
per ton, $30.00.
Fresh Meats Choice dressed heel
steers, price 7 He; cows, 7c; mutton 8c;
pork, 8c; trimmed, 9c; veal, 9
11c.
Hams Large, 13c; small, 13 'a;
breakfast bacon, 13jc; dry salt sides.
8c.
Portland Market.
Wheat Walla Walla. 55c;
Valley, 55c; Blnestem, 59c per bushel.
Flour Best grades, $3.20; graham,
$2.60; superfine, $2.10 per barrel.
Oats Choice white, 35c; choice
gray, 33c per bushel.
Barley Feed barley, $14.00 15.00;
brewing, $16.00 per ton.
Millstuffs Bran, $12.50 ton; mid
dlings, $19; shorts, $13; chop, $14 pei
ton.
Hay Timothy, $1011; clover,$7
7.60; Oregon wild hay, $67 per ton.
Butter Fancy creamery, 4045c:
store, 25c.
Eggs 18ac per dozen.
Cheese Oregon full cream, 13c;
Young America, 14c; new cheese 10c
per pound.
Poultry Chickens, mixed, $3.00
8.50 per dozen; hens, $4.50; springs,
$2.003.50; geese, $4.005.00 forold:
$4.506.50; ducks, $3.004.00 per
dozen; turkeys, live, 14 15c pei
pound.
Potatoes 40 50c per sack; sweets,
22jc per pounu.
Vegetables Beets, $1; turnips, 75c;
per sack; garlic, 7c per pound; cab
bage, lac per pound; parsnips, $1;
onions, lic per pound; carrots, $1.
Hops 2 8c per pound.
Wool Valley, 15 16c per pound;
Eastern Oregon, 10 15c; mohair, 25
per pound.
Mutton Gross, best sheep, wethers
and ewes, 3c; dressed mutton, 7
7io per pound; lambs, 5)c.
Hogs Gross, choice heavy, $5.00;
light and feeders, $4.50; dressed,
$5.006.50 per 100 pounds.
Beef Gross, top steers, $4.004.50;
cows, $3.504.00; dressed beef, 68
7c per pound.
Veal Large, 6g7ao; small, 8
8'2o per pound.
San Francisco Market.
I Wool Spring Nevada, 13 15c pei
, pound; Eastern Oregon, 10 15c; Val
! ley, 1820c; Northern, 1012c.
i Hops 1899 crop, 11 13c pei
pound.
I Butter Fancy creamery 19 20c;
I do seconds, 19c; fancy dairy,
17c; do seconds, 1516,1-2C per poqnd.
1 Eggs Store, 16c; fancy ranch,
20c.
, Millstuffs Middlings, $17.00
j'20.00; bran, $12.50 13.50.
Hay Wheat $6.50 10; wheat and
I oat $6.00 9.50; best barley $5.00
' 7.00; alfalfa, $5. 00 6. 00 per ton;
straw, 25 40c per bale.
Potatoes Early Rose' 60 75c; Ore
' gon Burbanks, 80c 90; river Bur
banks, 35 05c; new. 70c$1.25.
Citrus Fruit Oranges, Valencia,
2.753.25; Mexican limes, $4.00
6.00; California lemons 'ioc$1.50;
do choice $1.752.00 per box.
Tropical Fruits Bananas, $1.50
8.60 per bunch; pineapples, nom-
inal;
Persian dates, 00'sc per
pound.
A GREAT INDUSTRY.
ENORMOUS BUSINESS DAIRYING
HAS COME TO BE.
Seventeen Million Cows Giving Milk
in the United States Aggresatc Val
ue of Their Produce Exceeds $500,
000,000 a Year This Country LeutU.
Comparatively few persons realize
what an enormous business dairying
has come to be in the United States. In
this industry, as in so many others, this
country beats the world. There are
over seventeen million cows giving milk
in the United States, and it takes an
army of over three hundred thousand
men working from ten to twelve hours
a day to milk them. The aggregate
value of the produce of these dairy
cows exceeds $500,000,000 a year. They
produce nearly a billion and a half
pounds of butter, three hundred thou
sand pounds of cheese and over two
billion gallons of milk yearly, for the
Yankee cow is a good cow, an Industri
ous cow, and works all the year round.
Dairying in other countries sinks into
msigniflcauce when compared with the
industry in the United States. So fond
are the Americans of dairy products
that it takes from twenty-three to
twenty-seven cows to each hundred cf
the population to keep the country sup
plied with milk, butter and cheese and
provide for the export trade. The ex
port trade does not amount to much.
It has fluctuated much, but never rose
beyond the produce of five hundred
thousand cows. Nearly all the great
output of the dairies is consumed at
home. We are the greatest butter-eating
people in the world, our average
yearly consumption being at the rate
of twenty pounds to the person, or
about one hundred pounds annually for
a family of average size. As cheese
eaters, however, we do not shine. The
average consumption of cheese in this
country does not exceed three and a
half pounds per capita a year, which
Is far below the European average. As
milk drinkers we average twenty gal
lons apiece yearly. Although we are
not great cheese eaters ourselves we
send about fifty million pounds a year
to the peoples of the earth, who are
fond of that form of food.
In Karly Days.
AH this great dairy industry of the
United States has been built up in the
last fifty years. Before that time he
milch cows of the country were of the
mixed and Indescribable race known as
"native." It was the "old red cow" of
our boyhood, specimens of which occa
sionally are seen in out-of-the-way
parts of the country living in the "old
red barn." The keeping of cows on an
American farm was incidental to the
general work. In the fall and early
winter the cow was allowed to go dry.
Winter dairying was practically un
known. The care of the milk and the
MILKING FORCE ON A
making of the butter and cheese were
in the bands of the women of the
household, and the methods and the
utensils used were crude. The average
quality of the products was inferior,
and the supply of the domestic markets
was unorganized and Irregular.
In the Eastern and Middle States the
milk was usually set in small, shallow
earthen vessels or tin pans for the
cream to rise. Little attention was paid
to cooling the air in which it stood in
summer or to moderating it in winter
so long as freezing was prevented. The
few who scalded milk had no idea of
the true reason for so doing or why
beneficial effects resulted. The pans of
milk oftener stootl in pantries and cel-
Cow of 1900 (Jersey).
DEVELOPMENT OP THE COW.
lars or on kitchen shelves than in rooms
specially constructed or adapted to the
purpose. In Southern Pennsylvania
and the States further south spring
houses were in vogue. Milk received
care, and setting it In earthen crocks
or pots, standing in cool, flowing water,
was a usual and excellent practice.
Churning the entire milk was common.
This is still done to some extent in the
Southern States, where butter is made
every morning, and where all the milk
is buttermilk. In seasons of scarcity of
milk there was no butter. In the North
ern States there were some instances
where families were supplied with but
ter weekly during most of the year, and
with an occasional cheese, directly from
the producers. But the general farm
practice was to "pack" the butter in
firkins, half firkins, tubs and jars and
The Oakes Cow
BUTTER MAKING
THE OLD WAY.
THE NEW WAY.
let the cheese accumulate on the farm,
taking these products to the market
only once or twice a year. Not only
were there as many different lots and
kinds of butter and cheese as there
were producing farms, but the product
of a single farm varied in character and
quality according to season and other
circumstances. Every package had to
be examined, graded and sold upon its
merits. It was usual for half the but
ter in market to be strong, if not actu
ally rancid, and for cheese to be sharp.
With the products largely low in grade,
prices also were low.
As a rule, -except in the pasture sea
son, the cows were fed insufficiently
and unprofitably and housed poorly, if
at all. It was a common thing for cows
to die in winter of starvation and ex
posure, and it was considered no dis
grace to farmers to have their cattle
"on the lift" in the spring. "On the
lift" was a common expression in the
past in some localities, indicating the
actual necessity of human aid to false
the emaciated animals to their feet.
LARGE DAIRY FARM.
There were, of course, some farmers
who took care of their cattle and who
made a specialty of turning out first
class dairy products, but as a rule
things were in the condition described.
Toward the middle of the century,
the production of cheese being in ex
cess of the home demand, an export
trade in it began. With the growth of
cities and towns the business of milk
supply increased and better methods
began to prevail. Then came the es
tablishment of "creameries" and the
improvement of the breed of dairy cat
tle. When the improvement of the na
tive stock of cattle began, a cow that
would give milk that would make a
pound of butter a day for two or three
months was a local celebrity. As late
as 1865, when good cows sold for $40
or less, an enterprising farmer in New
England advertised widely that he
would pay $100 for any cow that would
yield fifty pounds of milk a day on his
farm for two or three consecutive days.
Not an animal was offered on those
conditions. Nowadays a cow that does
not average from six to seven quarts
of milk a day for 300 days being 4,000
to 4,500 pounds a year is not consid
ered profitable. There are many herds
having an average yearly product of
5,000 pounds a cow, and single animals
are many which give ten or twelve
times their own weight in milk during
the year. The quality of the milk has
improved so much that the nrilk of one
cow now will make as much butter as
did the milk of three or four of the old
native animals.
Prodigies.
Though the old native stock was a
pretty tough and disreputable race of
cows, there would appear once in a
while in it a prodigy. Such was the
famous "Oakes cow" of Massachusetts,
which astonished the world, In 1816,
by giving forty -four pounds of milk a
day, out of which was made 467 pounds
of butter in one season. This ostenta
tious cow did this when her friends and
neighbors were proud they produced
sixty pounds of butter a year. It made
her famous, and she had her picture
painted in oil, but none of her de-'
scendants took after her, and she was
regarded as a freak.
Nowadays the Oakes cow would be
regarded as a good cow nothing more.
The Shorthorn breed led in the intro
duction of improved cattle Into the
United States and formed the founda
tion upon which many fine dairy herds
were built. They were brought from
England, and much of the Shorthorn
OLD AND NEW.
blood can still be fouud in prosperous
dairy districts throughout the United
States. Soon, however, they began to
breed the Shorthorns for their beef
qualities, and now few full-blooded
Shorthorns are classed as dairy cattle.
Ayrshlres from Scotland, Holstein
Friesians from Holland and Jerseys
and Guernseys from the Channel
Islands were then brought in, and
upon animals graded and improved
from these breeds the vast dairy indus
try of the country now mainly depends.
The Ayrshires and Holstems are great
milk givers, and the Jerseys and
Guernseys (often miscalled Alderneys)
are great butter makers. Brown Swiss
and Simmenthan cattle from Switzer
land, the Normandy breed from France
and red-polled cattle from the south of
England have also been imported, but
are in what is known to dairymen as
the "general purpose class." They are
pretty good in everything, but have no
specialties.
It used to be-believed that successful
dairying could be carried on only in the '
United States in a belt lying between
the latitude of Philadephia and the lati
tude of the northern boundary of Ver
mont and extending as far west as the
Missouri River. Even in that belt it
was believed that the true dairying dis
tricts were in detached sections which
did not occupy more than one-third of
Its area. This idea has been exploded.
It has been found that good butter and
cheese can be made in almost all parts
of Northern America. As a rule good
butter can be made wherever good beef
can be produced.
Mechanical Devices.
Along with the growth of the dairy
business came the invention of many
mechanical devices for doing by ma
chinery what had hitherto been done
by hand. One curious device is called
the dairy "centrifuge," "cream separ
ator" or "skimmer." It is' a closed
bowl revolving at the rate, sometimes,
of 25,000 times a minute. The milk
flows through a feed pipe into the rap
idly whirling bowl, and from the bowl
two projecting tubes discharge continu
ously the one cream and the other
skimmed milk. A skimmer of standard
factory size handles 250 gallons of milk
an hour. This is different from the
good wife "setting" the milk and then
going around with her little tin skim
mer and removing the cream for the
morrow's churning.
An excellent example of the changes
wrought in dairy practice is afforded
by an instance in Northern Vermont,
a region long noted for its butter pro
duction. St. Albans is the business
center of Franklin County. During
the middle of the century the country
made butter from miles around came to
this market every Tuesday. The aver
age weekly supply was thirty to forty
tons. This butter was varied in qual
ity, was sampled and classified with
much labor and expense, placed in three
grades and forwarded to the Boston
market, 200 miles distant. All this but
ter was made upon 1,000 or 2,000 differ
ent farms, in as many churns. In 1880
the first creamery was built In this
county; ten years later there were fif
teen. Now, a creamery company in St.
Albans has fifty-odd skimming or sep
arating stations distributed through
this and adjoining counties. To those
is carried the milk from more than 30,
000 cows.. Farmers having home sep
arators may deliver cream, which, be
ing inspected and tested, is accepted
and credited at its actual butter value.
just as other raw material is sold to
mills and factories. The separated
cream is conveyed by rail and wagon
largely the former to the central fac
tory. There, In one room, from ten to
twelve tons of butter are made every
working day. A single churning place
for a whole county!
Only one thing in dairying remains
unaltered and unchanged. That is the
milking of the cows. Many mechanical
devices have been invented and pat
ented for the milking of cows- by ma
chinery, but none of them has been a
success. Cows'are milked now as they
were in the days of Abraham, and still
Mary "calls the cattle home across the
sands of Dee."
There Would Be No Change.
"No, Harry, I am sure we could not
be happy together; you know I always
want my own way in everything."
"But, darling, you could go on want
ing it after we were married." Brook
lyn Life.
It's far easier to show another man
his proper place in the w ''d than It
is to find your own.
HraOR OF TEE WEEK
TORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Odd, CuilH susd Lsatsssl. KsM
ot Busman -Nature Graphical' y Par
tray ad by Kauinent Ward Artists of
Our Own Day-A Budget of Fna
Farmer Do you think much butter
Is healthy?
Gardner Yes, it may be healthy, pro
vided It is strong but not healthful.
Boston Transcript
No Last Train.
Porter (at the Irish country railway
station, in voluble, but dreary mono
ton) The half past 9 o'clock train win't
sthart to-night till 10 o'clock, and
there'll be no lasht train. Tit Bits.
Mental Arithmetic in Boston.
"And now, Georgie, if I take three
oranges and cut one in halves, what
popular story will It remind you of?"
"That's easy, dad. "Two Half and
Two Whole, of conrse." Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Modern Kngagement.
Heiress Your offer Is flattering,
Baron, but I cannot marry you!
Baron Well, then, at least become
engaged to me for about three weeks
to improve my credit!" Fliegende
Blaetter.
Get All the News.
"No," said the Oldest Inhabitant, "I
don't s'pose a daily paper could do well
here in BowersvilJe. You see, there's
either a quilting bee, a sewing circle, a
literary society or a sociable every
night, an' when they don't happen the
women folks goes to the milliner store
or the dressmaker's."
Discomforts of Home Comforts.
"That's a cozy-looking couch, old
man."
"Yes; but I never go near It"
"What the matter?"
"Well, there are only three pillows
that I'm allowed to put my head on,
and I can't stand the wear and tear of
picking them out from the other seven."
Chicago Record.
Expedience.
Blobbs So Bjones has married his
deceased wife's sister.
Slobbs Yes; he didn't want to take
chances with a new mother-in-law.
Philadelphia Record.
Terrible Risk.
"Well, Maria, I have, decided to take
the awful risk "
"What risk, John?"
"Even though it may be my death."
"John, for goodness "
"And I better tell you In advance
that I prefer a granite monument"
"What in the world are you going to
do, John Stubb?"
"I am going to take off my flannels,
Maria!" '
Superfluous Question.
AWas your wife still awake when
you came home this morning?
B Was she! I should say she was!
Fliegende Blaetter.
Juvenile Foresight.
"Sammy, where did you get that ice?
"Th' Iceman gimme it"
"Isn't It too cool a day for you to be
eating ice?"
I "P'raps; but mebbe he'll come along
some hot day an' won't gimme any."
Chicago Record.
A Medinm Rap.
The medium stood behind the black
curtain. Suddenly there sounded a
loud rapping.
"Is that dear Charles rapping?" in
quired the lady who was there to inter
view her deceased husband.
"No'm!" spoke up the medium's son;
"that's the iceman at the front door."
Loud Demonstration.
Pearl Were the clown's jokes funny?
Ruby Yes, he succeeded in making
the lion roar.
Good Definition.
Little Willie What is a hypocrite,
pa?
Pa A hypocrite, my son, is a man
who always acts differently when he
knows some one is watching him.
Soft Boiled.
Ida When we were In London our
waiter insisted upon calling an egg a
"hegg." I told him to drop the "h."
May And did he, dear?
Ida Well, my silk gown shows that
he dropped the "egg."
The Usual Reason.
Daughter Papa, I wish you'd get me
the New Universal International Un
abridged Encyclopedia, complete in
ninety-nine volumes.
Father Gee Whittaker! Why do you
want that?
Daughter Because Clara Wayupp
baa one. New York Weekly.
A. Prairie Tale.
"Hank" Green came in the otbw day
with a drove of steers. "Hank" saya
there Is a man in his settlement so
stingy that he wants to die right away
because he heard tombstones are going
P.
Never Limited.
"Sometoimes," said the janitor phil
osopher, "th' soize af a doctor's practice
is limited, but thor's nlver iny limit to
th' soize av his bills."
New Toes.
Shoe Clerk "Entirely new toes will
be seen In shoes this year."
Customer "Well, I guess I will be
satisfied with the same toes I've always
had."
Logical.
Little Willie Where do sea horses
come from, pa?
Pa Why, from the sea, of course."
Little Willie "Then bay horses must
come from the. bay, don't they, pa?"
Point of View.
The Dear Girl Life in camp must be
truly grand.
The Rough Rider Yes, indeed! It's
simply in-tents!"
About the Size of It.
The Youth What is the secret of
true happiness?
The Sage To have what you want
when you want it
The Man of It.
"Poor Lot!" exclaimed a lady In the
art gallery as she paused in front of
a painting representing the family
leaving the doomed city; "I wonder
what be thought when he beheld his
wife transformed into a pillar of salt!"
"I suppose," replied her husband,
"that he thought he would now have
a chance to get a fresh one." Chicago
News.
All He May Expect.
"So, there," said Mrs. Henpeck, con
cluding her remarks, " 'A word to the
wise is sufficient' "
"Yes, my dear," replied Henpeck,
"and to the average married man a
word in edgewise is sufficient." Phila
delphia Press.
A Financier.
Browne He's to marry Miss Sumrox,
eh? I didn't think he had enough
money to support a wife. What's his
business?
Smythe Banking.
Browne Really ?
Smythe Yes; he's banking on the
money her father will give her. Phila
delphia Press.
New Field of Labor.
"Work? You make me laugh. What
kind of a Job have you got?"
"Cleanin' horses fer an autermobile
line."
Feminine Intuition.
Mistress Jane, you may clear away
the breakfast dishes and put the house
In order. I'm going to my dressmaker's
to have a new gown fitted.
Jane Yes, ma'am; Are you going to
take your latchkey, or shall I sit up
for you? Chicago News.
Nothing Serious.
Sweltering Passenger Ton railroad
train) This window sticks so 1 can t
get it up.
Conductor Yes. Wood Is swollen a
little by the rain. It'll be all right iu a
few days. New York Weekly.
Got It All.
Superintendent I was watching you
and observed that you entered but one
house in the square between Upth and
Blank streets, yet your report gives full
statistics of every family in that
square. Please explain this, sir.
Census Taker The lady whom I saw
in that one house belongs to the same
card clubs as do all the other ladies in
that neighborhood. Baltimore Ameri
can. It Impressed Her.
Bob Nan, what first attracted youi
attention to me?
Nan Well, Robert, if you musi
know, it was your pale, silly-looking
little mustache. Indianapolis Journal.
In the Case.
Stubb Young Stillman said that ii is
girl always kept him waiting.
Penn So I heard.
Stubb Well, he has had her picture
reproduced on his watch so that she
will always be on time.
In Dear Old Lnnnon,
Ida Is the air very thick in London I
May So thick that it frequently
chokes the air-brakes on the trains.
From the South.
Ida I wonder where the new board
er got those sandy whiskers?
May I guess he got them from eat
ing strawberries.
Muny Theaters in Italy.
The population of Italy is 8,000,OOC
less than the population of France, but
Italy has more theaters than France
and twice as many as England, though
the population of the United Kingdom
is fully 5,000,000 larger than that of
Italy. There are approxithately 1,000
places of amusement in the United
States. In Italy there are 448, in France
437, in Germany 390, in Great Britain
352, and in Spain 210. One explanation
of the large number of theaters in Italy
is to be found in the fact that the culti
vation and appreciation of music are
perhaps more general in Italy than in
any other country, and many of the
playhouses, therefore, are devoted not
to theatrical, but to musical, entertain
ments.
Pie In Philadelphia.
"Really." exclaimed the waitress fir
Mrs. Starvem's boarding-house, who
had seen better days, "we never fur
nish a knife with pie."
"No?" remarked the new boarder,,
"well, then, bring the ax." PhiladeV
Dbla Record.