RI
CORD.
VOL. 8. KENNA, CHAVES COUNTY NEW MEXICO, FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 27, 1914.
NO. 2.
Events of Interest from the Seat 6f
Government,
BY J E. JONES.
Territorial Expansion and
Development.
When Secretary William II.
Seward purchased Alaska for
tlm counliy. he carried his prop
-usition through Conf-itsiS with'
Mhe aid cf Charles Sumner, the
fgreat Massachusetts statesman,
Itvhn fi .retold with exact nicety
in a prophetic speech, of . the
material riches of Alaska. A
Iortft its frozen trails the wealth
of an en pi re has already hewn
totd into civiiizatii )i, T h e
United States owns the groat
c:oal Golds of Ala ka, and -to df
velop ai d protect, what is per
haps the gieattist deposit in Hie
world, the governrnent will
liuildn thousand miles of rail
iroad at an expense of $35,000
(000 A privately constructed'
Railroad in Alaska would he
Worthless without coal leases
from thi' government; and since
no administration would dare
make these leases there is
nothing left to do except for the
, United States to i un the double
U'Voprsitkn of a railioad, and
.coal mining, on its own account.
T : n P.. .Olivia KnuiiiucQ nrrtnrwi.
it ion which any, set of large
ibusinets men would he only too
glad to take out of the hands of
the government.- There has
been a storm of prott st against
expansion in Alaska, which is
not. st rai gr since territorial ex
pansion and development hasal
Yay8had a rough road.
The Honoiable Josiah Quincy
of Massachusetts warntd Con
gress of the danger of the Louis
iana purchase, and told his coi
Seagues that they had no au
thority or right to throw the
I IgULS illlU tico wiu i'. -j
of this people into hotch-pot
with the wild men of Missouri,
nor with the mixed, though
more respectable race of the
"nglo-IIispano-Oallo-Ainencans
who hasti on the sands at the
mouth of the Mississippi.
"When it came to the Oregon
purchase, the Senate of the
United States ,-was ti-ld by un il
lustrious Senator that he would
not give "a pinch of snuff for
. i 1 1 : 1 A z . ..-I et t i
the Whole territory, which ne
proceeded to describe as a ''wild
gambling venture " Another
Senator who hap)ened ro he
from New Jersey said that
Oregon can never he one of thb
United States. If we extend
our laws to it we must consider
it as a colony." He declaied
that "the Union is already too
extensive.'' Later on came the
renowned Daniel Webster, hor
rified by the proposition to at
tach Texas, California andNw
Mexico to the United States.
"I have never hoard tf any
thing, cannot conceive of any
thing that in more absurd or
more affrontive to' all sober
judgment. New Mexico and
California are not worth one
dollar.
The Alaska railroad is not a
newly discovered proposition.
Secretary of the Interior Fisher
of th Taft. administration used
. - . .hi Jwor. pffnrt.i to ritiicp a trunk
line from the ocean to the great
interior valleys of the Yukon
and Tenaha, which ho declared
to he nocessarylin order to "open
thecouutiy so that its future
development tnny bo made pos
sible." How About a Statue for Lee? ,
The late Senator Cnlloui greet
ed eleven presidents of the
United States when they came
to Washington. Among these
was his friend, A b r a h a tn
Lincoln. The last efforts of
Senator Culloni were devoted to
the work of securing a memorial
to the man whom he loved in
life, and cherished in memory.
N-jw'an ex-Confederate so'.dier,
former Governor Blackburn of
Kentucky, succeeds Mr. Cullom
as the resident Washington
commissioner. In C o u g r e s s
there has been a suggestion that
a monument he erected in the
National Capital to Robert E.
Lee. These circumstances show
that the north and the south are
"mixing it up" rather energet
ically. Seven Hundred to One.
It may not be that Senator
Ashurstof Arizona has absolute
ly authentic figures, yet he has
made a statement that from the
organization of the? g o v e rn
ment down to the present time,
the glorious peace-loving people
of the United States of America
have spent :s700upon aggressive
and defensive wars, paying for
wars that have been fought, arifl
piepaiing for wars that are an
ticipated, while we have spent
one dollar for ether purposes of
administration.
INVENTORY YOURSELF
Some boys in an eastern uni
versity have drawn up ''the col
lege students' ten command
ments," nine of which aren't
important, but the tenth has
class It direc ts the student to
fakejari inventory of himself at
least once a month.
"Take an inventory of your
self." It is easily said. What
does it mean?
Of course you know what the
merchant's inventory is at the
close of the year-- a detailed list
of goods in stock wit h reckon
ing f values. So many yards
of this, so many yards ot that,
at x cents a vard. There are no
subtieties in mch an account
ing. By just takii g pains, the
storekeeper can learn where he
is, to the decimal of a cent.
T htask is more difficult when
the thing to be measured is a
huian soul. You can't lay it
on a yard stick or compute its
constituent parts in terms of
dollars.
Still, you can do this: You
can pause from lime to ti ne
and tisk yourself: "II a v e 1
gained in wisdom or in kindli
ness or in patience since the last
review?' Am 1 neaterand sweet
er and more liveable- -with'
Have I done something worth
while? If not, why not and, if
so, how can I improve on my
achievements in the months to
come.
inasmuch as you are the one
who has to live with yourselt it
might not bo a bad idea to form
this habit as frequent' inspection
and self analysis, with a view
to making the association better
worth wliifrt
SCRAP BASKET.
A nrmborof nvn have found
out to their sorrow that "it is
easier to morlgnfto iht; home to
buy an automobile than it is to
mortgage an automobile to buy
a home
A CURT REPLY
T ! ie proof -reader on a certain
western daily was a woman of
great precision an. I extreme
propriety. One day a reporter
succeeded in getting into type
an item f.bout Willie Brown, the
boy who was burned in the
West End by a live wire. The
next day the reporter found on
his desk a fiigid note asking.
'Which is the .west end of a
boy?" It took only an instant
to reply, "The end the son set
on, of course.'" Ex. .
THE REAL PROBLEM -The
fyrm3r and his wife
watched their dog as he chased
madly down the track after the
i o'clock train Tie did it every
day andalwavs returned wind
ed. "I wonder why he chase that
train," remarked the wife with
her eyes on a little cloud of dust
that showd where Uovcr was.
"Thai's not what's bothering
rue," answered her husband.
"I'm wondering what he'd do
wiih it if he caught if." House
keeper. THE MEW DANCES.
"If we are going to stand for
our women folks wearing slit
and shadow skirts, aid our
younger ladies learning to dance
the boll weevil wiggle, Texas
Tommy, tango, the bunny hug,
the near dance, the half-cantor,
the buzzard flop, and so on down
the line, the men folks might
just as well keep on smoking,
drinking, chewing, snoozing,
swearing and doing every thing
else that's bad, and then the
whole push can go to hell to
gether," says the level headed
editor of the Pincville, Georgia,
Herald.
A current newspaper item is
as follows: "The wife of a
Methodist minister in west Vir
ginia has been married three
times Her' maiden name was
Partridge, her first husband was
named Robins, her second Spar
row, arid the present is mined
Quale. There, are now t wo
young robing one sparrow and
three little quales in the family.
One grandfather was a Swan,
and another a Jay, but he's dead
now and a bird of Paradise.
They live on Hawk aveii u e,
Eagleville, Canary Islend, and
the fellow who wrote this is a
Lyre bird and a relative of the
family."
. MEN AND CIGARS
Because of the solemn arb a
cigar' salesman was mistaken
for a man of the cloth and invit
ed to make a few remarks. He
acbeded to tho request and as
cending the platform saidr'
"Men are like cigars, Often
you can not tell by tho wrapper.
S whit tlio fillr
SCIENTIFIC DEDUCTION
by HOMER HARPER.
"Even dii J says I'm the cleverest
little observer he ever saw," Nora re
marked modestly. "I've beon.study
ihg out the fciiBracteriyties and occu
pations of people on street curs and
everywhere just from their expres
sions and wrinkles and clothes, you
kijpw. Si lentific deducMon!
"The otlir-r night I went to a party
with Roper, where I knew hardly a
single soul. Coming home I told him
loads about everybody there and he
said it was perfectly wontlerful. Of
course, lloger does Gometimes exag
gerate: about me!"
She wrote another sentence and
pnded it wilh a nourish. Felicity net
tled her smnll bonnet n trille closer.
"You ceriainfy are a wonder," the
sighed, enviously. "I never could
write a letter and carry on a conver
sation at the same time, much less
kuckh anybody's family tree at the
P-ist fiance. I've cot to no home and
soothe Knty. Ti.is beins wash day,
father just naturally telephoned that
lie was bringing a new (lernian bac
teriologist homo to lunch. Don't for
get that you're coming tomorrow."'
"One-thirty sharp," acquiesced Nora.
The door had just closed behind
Felicity and Nora was preparing to
tear up the sheet of paper on which
the had been writing so nonchalantly
when her attention was distracted by
a small mouse, which ran out from
under tiic bookcase.
Norn's b'isinc.iitljho manner dissolv
ed in sudden frl;;ht. liouncinii out of
her ch:ti: she p r.'hcTl upon the fl.-slC
drawing 1 or feet in carefully. A mo
ment later the door 'opened and a palo
youth looked in absentniindedly us
if he had been sent to the office on an
errand, which h, had unfortunately
forgo; ten at the threshold. II was ob
vious that he did not lake In the sit
uation at ul!.
Very likely a freshman or a sopho
more, Nora deduced rapidly. One of
the utterly absorbed variety that
dreams of autopsies.
Imsm
5V
m
'IKindly Catch That Moute."
yocd old stogie is more popular
than an important celebrity.
Some men are "all right in the
showcase, un display, but are
great disappointments when you
gefythem homo, o matter how
fine a man is, eventually he
meets his match. A two-for
often puts on as many airs as a
50-filter. Some men never get
to the front at all except during
campaigns. Some are very
fancy outside and are selected
for presents. Others have a
rough exterior, hut spread cheer
and coinforr. about them be
cause of what h inside. But all
men, as all cigars, good or bad
two-for?, Btogic-s, i ich or poor,
come to ashes i.t last.
If you will subscribe to The
Record or renew your subscript
ion, we will include four
stand.um) magazines, all one
10
mum
m
wmmm
"Kindly catch that mouse for me,"
Bho directed briskly, Indicating tb
bold liltlw creature with a wave Of her
hi'iid. j
"Oh!" He came back to earth -with
a si ait . Then he moved n!oTy and
carefully toward the mous whh-li
lost its head and retreated to- the oth
er bookcase, which had no exit under
it. Down on ii handM and knees
dropped tlm youth, lost In the chae.
For a few moments confusion reigned
underneath the. bookcase. Then the
awkward young man roue, holding th
wrinf-linR mouse in one hand.
"What are you going to do with It?"
inquired Nora In ft tone which Implied
that he was stealing her little pet.
"Inoculate it with tuhereujotitu," he
said, dreamily. .
"Yon shan't!" Norn's tone wai firm.
He raided his eyebrows and looked ' N
at her for the first time. "You wish
me -to put it back there?" he asked,
politely, pointlu? to the bookcase.
"Indeed not!" sntd Nora, disgusted
by such stupidity. "Take It put and
lose it. piease."
The youth bowed. "Very "well." ha
said, and backed out, gently rubbing
the mouse with a crooked forefinger.
It wan the next day that. Felicity
shook her friend Nora by the shoul
ders. "What's the matter, Nora?
Have you lost your Job?"
"tf oulv I hadl" Nora sank Into
..Mir and fanned herself vlxorously.
"I'Yluiiy. I know absolutely nothing
about sclent Iflo deduction. I wish I'd
never played wHh it. I can't tall a.
clrcurf rider from a well, a circuit
rider. : ,.
"Well," Felicity began, consolingly,
"you couldn't lie half as bad as tha
object that took luncheon with us
yesterday. He had a mouse in his
pocket and it made a gay getaway
while fjiiipr vas describing ..his jie.t .
bacillus.' it was the liveliest 'lunch
ion we ever had."
Nora looked up and asked Irrele
vantly, "Was his face all marked?"
"Yes. Student duels In Uermany."
"And manners?" j
"So many he trips over them."
"The lierr profeesor himself! I told
hliu to catch that moui?e In my office
yesterday after you left and he lid.
This morning when I went to the ad
vanced bacteriology clasa up roie my
little pied piper and lectured. A you
probably know, he's the latest acquisi
tion of our medical school he's from
Ilerlin.
"Oil, Felicity, henceforth I'm going
to be a simple little maiden who
thinks it's downrlpht wicked to try
to be clever!" Chicago Dully Newi. ;
SOME APPETITE.
The Maysville. Ky.. Bulletin
prints the following:
A tall, gaunt young ma n
entered the officu of the (IkJiw
Museum and Family Theatre
and asked fir the manager.
"WUaJaivT do for you?"' in
quired a pudgy man in a check
ed suit.
"I want an engagement as a
freak in the curio hall."
'Who are your"
k,l am Enoch, the egg king."
"What is your specially ;"
' I can cat three dozen hen
eggs, t wo dozen duck eggs and
ore dozen goose egg at a single
sitting."
"I snnpose you know oui
policy."
"What's that."
''We give four shows a day."
"I understand tbat.f
'.'And do yon thinly you ran
doitr"
"1 know I can."
'On Saturdays we often give
as many as six show. '
"All right."
"And on some holidays we
give a pel fnrmance every hour.''
.T no young man hesitated.
"In that case," he finally said.
I must have one thing under
stood before 1 sig a contract."
"What is I half" asked the
maniger.
"No matter how rushing busi
ness Is at I he museum," thegg
king replied "you gotta gimme
time enough to eat my regular
inN '!,! j.'1''.! "'jr. I.