The Eddy current. [volume], July 03, 1897, Image 5

About The Eddy current. [volume] (Eddy [Carlsbad], N.M.) 189?-1899

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t. r
THE STAtt-SPANaLED DANNEP,
I1Y FRANCIS SCOTT KEY.
O say, can you see, by tho dawn's oMy
llRht.
"What bo proudly wo hall'd. nt tho twi
light's last gloaming
"Whoso broad stripe and bright stars,
through tho Clouds of tho light,
O'ar the rampart we watched woro -
. gallantly strenmlngi
jnd tho rookof red stare, tho bombs
bursting In air,
flavo proof through tho night that our
ting was still thero;
O say. doe that star-spangled banner
yet wavo
O'er tho land of tho froo and tho homo
of tho brave?
On that horo dimly scon through tho
mists of tho deep,
Whoro tho foo'a haughty host lit dread
ullcnco reposes,
"What In that which tho breeze, o'er tho
towering stoop,
As It fitfully blown, now conceals, now
discloses?
Now It catohes tho gleam of tho morn-
' lng'sflrst beam,
la full glory reflected ndw shlnoa on
Juo stream;
'TIs tho star-spangled banner; 0 long
may It wave
'er tho land of tho freo and tho homo
of the bravo!
whore Is that band who so vaunt
In gly swore
That tho havoo of war and tho battle's
confusion
A homo and a country should lsavo tm
no more?
Tholr blood has washed out their foul
footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save tho hireling and
slavo
From tho terror of flight or tho gloom
of tho grave;
And tho star-spangled bauner In tri
umph doth wavo
O'er tho land of tho freo and tho homo
of tho brovo.
01 thus bo It ovor, when freemen shall
stand
llotwcon their loved homos and tho
war's desolation!
Blest with victory and peaco, may the
heav n-rcscueu lanu
Pralso tho power that hath mfido and
nrrserved ua a nation.
Tnca conquer wo must, whon our causo
It Is lust,
And this bo our motto "In God la our
trust!".
And tho star-spangled, banner In trl
umph shall wavo
O'er tho land of the free and the homo
of the brave.
.Uriam Q.wp J 'JLY.
, 1 1 f I
"'At? ' VKIt memorable
and gloriole
Fourth! The sun
went down last
mlnht beyond the
il mi . iikooii uirm-
I . 1 1 . I , .
fijf plan chariot, with
umurieu streamers,
flinging up golden
olouds behind .ts
wheels. Along the
west tloatod tho
ilrnntrv nt rrtlrlnir ilnv. mill Hi
horizon glowed with the prophetic
glory of the coming morn, nature
her sides for ten thousand sue.
ccsilvo concussions of gunpowder, and
the atmosphere cleared Itself In omi
nous preparation lor considerable
moke. Yesterday, "lllrnam Wood
came to Uunslnnue." or to town, and
began to stand up prim, before booths
and beer slops. pine, reuar. spruce
ii tnnb mrure. and straight and na
tural M theusa trylag to wako peo
nt IibUct thar MM-uaa un and erow
there 1mH tkt. like the gourd
1 F-
mm
tuko no alarm, Dolnvan and his army
may, In prospect of bacchanalian com
memorations.
At nlno o'olook last night woro hoard
tho first preltidoa of tho great day, In
tho sound of flro ornekors, squibs and
flying serpents not unlike tho Hy
ing serpents sent to punish the anolent
people, hut without n brazen sorpent to
euro tho bitten. All tho poles boar
flags, Instead, wlioj stripes and stars
lnltnnie, In many n youthful bosom.
that tort of patriotism which finds os
enpoment In torpedoes and flory-wlng-cd
reptiles.
Tho booming cannon at midnight
ushors In tho eventful nnnlyorsury,
and now,
"No sloop till morn,"
or thoronftor! You bogln to dream of
the olden time that "tried souls," when
men stnrted from tholr couches at the
roar of a foreign Hon; nnd thorol
crack! nenr your window goes off a
gun, or something worse. You console
yourself, hownvor, with tho thought
this may bo tho tint nnd tho last salti
(MY TIIOOI'8 MAIICII.
tntlon so uoar nt hand; anil with this
reflection you nro falling Into a doll
oIoub lapso, when, there! another Is
heard, nearer still. And such another!
You listen, nnd wondor whether tho In
strument burst or not, almost hoping
It did, In ordor to tormlnatc this scrou
ado of thunder. Well, you about con
clude nn uctual explosion took place
and you begin to fear tho Juvenile Ju
niter has beon kicked over nnd wound
cd In tho cause of his country. In
your sympathy for tho fallen patriot
you llston nncw, and aro tempted to
turn out to hi relief, whon by tho
shadow of I'luto nnd all his subtcrran
can armory! rlcht under your win
low, hollows suoh nnothor gunpowder
fulmlnntlon as you novor expect to
hear again. No matter, however, for
tho occasion gives moment to tho most
trifling olroiimstnnees, and you feel
reconciled with thought on tho bless
odness of liberty. Yet, with a romnant
of desperation, you wish all the sul
phur nnd saltpetre of tho under king
dom thrust Into somo pleoe of artillery
like that whloh Milton ascribes to tho
Inventive genius of Satan, and touched
off at once and forever.
Dut the sun Is up, and the "rook
ribbed hills" tremble at dawn with the
boom of a hundred cannonading
echoes. From yonder tall staff streams
the banner high and gay In the morn
Ing light and breeze a ribbon sail
strung out from the fleecy cloud on
which the angel at freedom rides In
the heavens over tho nations of earth
Angel of Columbia, weep notl for
though millions beneath thee groan
yet a llttlo whllo longer, and the shout
that rings from Maine to Oregon shall
be the shout of a race redeemed from
the last band. 'Now mellowly mingles
the sound of martial music with th
morning air. Hay troops march, with
gay plumes and glistening arms, along
tho thoroughfare, as proutf of them
selves as the boys are who march by
their Ride. In anarohtal file, keeping
time with fife and drum, lloom, room
now. for the land-sons of Nentnne.
with coats of many hues and Joseph
shirts, dragging tholr tridents behind
trimmed and trusty for the raging con
flagration And then cornea Flora, with
her fairy baud decked in green and
blotsom array moving onward in gen
tic and smiling proresslou. Ilka a flow
cry Island floatfiig down the meadow
stream, to the tnusle of nymphs and
tho rippling of Itden waters. Tho bells
ring In Joyous peal, and cash stroke pf i
tho metal thrills the tramping multl
t'lilo with a shock of Indefinable onfliu-
1 s'asni. Croat thoitghu of tho glory
! and greatne- of the country STttO In
truly n loom, wholly uuusea to any
rx? inordinary emotions. With wfcnt
profound awe and admiration does
that youth stand yonder in tho street,
now wildly gnajng, with oye and
mouth wide open, first at the crowd,
and then at the IrannevJ strung from
(hi'nncy tn chimney, nnd steeple to
steeple The town folk take him to ,
iio nn unripe vegetable, Just because j '
c wears what he please boots for , .
service, more than for MUteWklng . i.
coat, bob-sttirtea ami gray, rather than
rudely flaunting, nnd a bell-erowned
lint raprlrious enough to hold nil the
piiiRrrlirmd he can afford to ptirehnie.
Yi ii. it he has no right to look as ho
).i.;ip,-k. nor tn thrust his hands deep
ir.t.i lit norkata, In siipiHirt of the In-
U imlcnt Indifference of his posi
tion, and on such n day, of wha' avail
nr nil the boasted privileges t the
uuntry ?
1 is now towards burning noon. All
tho shops ami factories have turned
out their flaunting troops of fashion
nnd beauty. J.nng proceMtons, stream
ing with perspiration and begrimed
with clouds of tho mother olement,
nro completing tholr everlasting cir
cuity through tho populous streets.
Squads of Juvonllo followers have fal
len off, and musloal Instruments bogln
to sound ns though their owners, In
stead of desiring to give out muoh
moro liquid mnrttal melody, wero in
need of some sort of liquid thorn-
solve. Tho van mombors of tho pro
cession, having ended tholr Journoy,
stand quite nt oaso, converting their
hntA Into fans; and, considering the
clroumfltnncos, look with very oool
complacency upon the unfortunato
a nee who are left to bring up the roar.
Hoda fountains mid smell beer estab
lishments are now In tho height of
operation. l'hlzl crack! popplol
popple! nnd expelled stopples go whiz
zing nnd booming frem tho roaming
muzzles of angry bottles, now glad to
broak loose and tako revougo for past
confinement. A thousand throata are
gurgling the delicious liquids, nnd
twice Hint iiumhor of llpa nro smack
ing, oxproiislve of grateful satisfaction,
much to tho aggravation of Innumer
nblc youngiters who stand looking on,
mournful from tho want of n fow cop-
pors, to onjoy similar Indulgences.
Ilononth booking pavilions, In crowd
ed halls, or happily In tho grcon grovo,
nt Inst gather tho onger host. Fans
(lit llko swarms of cooling phantoms
beforo glowing faces, and tho orator
of tho day opens with tho ominous
'Followcltlzons!" For nn hour ho
sinks and soars, generalizes from Homo
to Plymouth, and becomes lost In tho
Immensity of themes. Hut now tho
grand festival Is at hand. Toasts, mu
sic, cheers and, then, there Is no cal
culating how easily tho responsibilities
of tho country weigh upon tho minds
of tho wctl-feasted multitude
Tho day doollnos nnd the sun hovers
In tho west like n Ilomnn candle, fling
ing Its hazy light over tho hills. Or,
thore it glares, with a groat rod oye,
towards the oast, ns though winking
in defiance of the monarchical powers
beyond tho Atlantic. Tho streets be
gin to echo tho tread of flagging feet.
Day palos Into twilight, nnd, as tho
western star comes out, a rocket as
cends to greet It. and mock Its dlstnnoe.
As darknoss creeps ovor tho land
icipo, lawns nnd parka darken with
human throngs; whllo windows, bal
conies and housetops tromblo undor
tho weight of pyrotechntcat gazers.
Shout nfter shout rises through tho
smoky air llko tho murmurlngs of tho
sen, as tho hoavons glow with cccen
hrlc Arcs, In mimicry of tho fireworks
of tho firmament. Dut tho hour has
gone by. nnd in tho gloom of night tho
weary wanderers hlo to their homes.
Slloncs nnd darknoss draw tholr cur
tains over n sleeping nation, whllo
dreams of tho departed day still ling
er around. Morning will soon come
again, and call forth tho tolling mill
ions tn the heat and burden of n
weary day. Hut sleep now In peace, ye
suffering sons and daughters of Matn
mondom! nnd dream ye of a liberty
not your own, though a name dear, and
NOW WILDLY OAZINU.
adored by hearts of Columbian colli
Sad and solemn tho scene of onchat
teled multitudes, yet fiver glorious with
propheur (i the Jubilee of an Ameri
can Fourth.
A (Ii Dentin.
Mrs. McLubert "How did ye
along wld th' dlntlst, Murty?"
git
Me-
Luberty "Sure, he molghty near kilt
me. so he did; but, bedad. ol liv th'
laugh on him. all th' same.'' Mrs M
I .liberty "is that io" McLuberty
is Dcgorrah' be pulled th wrong
toi " Judge.
ALL AI30UT AIRSHIPS.
CrtA OF
AEniAU NAVIdATION
IS AT HAND.
A riillnlrlhl Sinn Sir 111 Inrrnllnn
Will (torrr I'rtMniRFr nt ttin Ul of
ion MIIm nn llmir llnWeir nt Mniiy
Atlrinl'
11 K model of a new
flying inaehlue.
built upon a novel
plan, lias been te
cd recently, In Phil
adelphia. It was
suecewiful In so far
as It proved to
lmve n lifting pow
er of twice Its own
weight. The ma
chine la cigar-
nhajwa-iliat is. It Is cylindrical In
form until nenr lt ends, where II
taper to blunt, points. It has two
Winn at each and, about fourteen feet
long ana four feet wide: tapering at
the onds ilk a bird'. The wing do
not go round nt an even speed, but have
a lieat like that of n bird s wing. The
machine use for power hot air and
liquid fuel. Tho framework, under the
cylinder. In which the engineer nnd
pilot work, give the machine n total
.height of eight feet. It U understand
that Mr. John 8t. Paul, the Inventor
of tls machine, claims that when It Is
porfeetod. whloh he expects to do In
two or throe months, thnt It will he
al lo to navlgato tho air nt a speed of
one hundred miles an hour oaslly.
Prafoesor Somuol P. Iingloy, secre
tory of tho Smithsonian Institute who
has been making experiments In aorlnl
navigation, thus wrltog to tho Now
York llornld on this subject:
"Ilognrdlng tho feasibility of aerlat
navigation for passenger transporta
tion nnd commercial purposes, there
can be no question. I have demon
strated the practicability of the air
ship, as ha been desorlhed at length
In various publleatlons. I nm confident
tnnt the right principles of coustruo
tlon hnve been arrived at. and. In my
opinion. It will only be a mnttor of a
short time, possibly a fow yoars. bo
fore nlr ships will bo In common uso
for purposes of reconnolterlng In war
and for Individual transportation gon
crnlly. Larger nlr ships will ulllmntoly
! constructed on rntlonal models and
with tho strength of materials and mo
tlvo power porfcotly ndjusted. nnd
these ships will ho used for freight nnd
general transportation.'
Whllo popular Interest hns to somo
extent beon nrouscd on tho problem of
nerlul navigation. It Is Interesting at
this tlmo to refer to tho first practical
oxpcrlmontri made by tho orlglnal'ln
vontors of the bnlloon, tho Montgnlllcr
hmthors moro than nno hundred
years ngo. Tho brothers woro dovotcd
students, nnd took groat Interest In
mathematics, natural philosophy and
chomlstry. In tho course of tholr stud
ios thoy liml road of tho many attempts
that hail boon made to navlgato tho
air. It was whllo watching nnd con
vcrslnc about tho clouds that theso
young moil first conceived the Idea of
a practicable balloon. The clouds rose
to tho upp' rog.ons, and floated thero,
simply because thoy wero lighter than
tho lower air; why, then, could they
not mnke an attlflclal cloud, and send
it up Inclosed In n bag? They flrst at
tempted to do this by filling n paper
bnlloon with hydrogen gas. It rose
slowly to tho celling of tholr parlor;
but, owing to tho rapid escape of tho
gas, It remained thore but a few sec
onds, and then dofosnded to tho floor.
They tried this experiment frequently,
but n bag which they could umbo
would rotnlu this ethereal gas long
enough for their purpose.
Thon thoy thought of the rapid as
cent of common smoke. Tholr bag of
cloud hud failed; why not try u bag of
smoko? In Movombor. 1782, Josoph
Montgolfler procured n largo silk bag.
halloon-shnpod with an opening nt tho
bottom. Making a flro of pnper. ho
caused his balloon to bo hold over It,
so as to receive tho smoke and hot air.
Very soon ho had tho delight of seeing
tho balloon swell, until it was fully
distended. When It was lot go It
mounted rapidly to the height of sov-onty-tlvo
feet, there remained station
ery for several minutes, and then slow
ly descended to the earth. Overjoyed at
this result. Josoph hastened to com
municate It to Ills brother, nnd they
proceeded Immediately to try the ex
periment on a larger scale.
A globe of coarao llnon, thirty feet
In diameter, lined with their own
paper, was soon ready for trial. A Are
was lighted and the balloon was sus
pended oyer It. Tho Inflation pro
ceeded rapidly until It required the
strength of three men to hold the bal
loon down, and when It was let go, it
leaped Into the air at a prodigious
speed and soared a high as the lower
stratum of olouds, when it was wafted
by the wind beyond their gaze.
Having brought their Invontlon to
this point, the brothers determined to
give a publlo exhibition. On a beautiful
day In June, 1783, a great concourse of
peoplo attended to Witness It. A body
of learned mm. who ehaneed to be
In session In a neighboring town, wero
present, as well as all tho nobility of
the vicinity. A large balloon of linen
hung loose from threo crossed poles,
with the orlfleo toward tho ground. A
fire of small bundles of chopped straw
was lighted, which generated the
smoke so fast that In Ave minutes the
balloon looked as though It would
burst, and It was all that eight stout
men could do to hold P. The signal
being given, the mn let go, and the
balloon rose rrpldly and. with on ac
celerated mottct rmid the huzza of
the multitude It continued to ascend
until It had reached the height ot a
tell
PIP
13
and cairlod away a) n Tlnayard n mile
and a half from th starting place. Th
ftfemblR w.14 transported with won
dor and delight, and hhllwl the
brothers as men who had done honor
to France by a grand dim-overy.
A repert of this eichl.ttlun wo trans
mitted to Part, and thence to th other
grant cities of Uunipe. The war botwwi
France. Kngland and the United State
having Jtut ended, this new marvel ex
cited nil minds, and It was nt once re
Mlvtd at Pari to repeat the experi
ment. A auberrlptlon w started to
defray the expanse which wa Imme
diately filled. The venerable Franklin,
then the most honored nam In fiurope,
vns one nt the etitMcrluers. On th
S7th nt Aiiguat, 178, the day appointed
for th Hcetit. the Clmmp d Mara, th
streets, and the vary house tops of
Paris were corm-wl with spectators on
the tip-to of expeetHtloH. The (Un
charge uf a cannon wa the signal far
letting go the balloon. Fully I minted
with hydrogen gas, and having no bal
last. It darted Into th etnas though
It had bean shot from a monster tm,
At th height of 1.000 feet It w lost
to view In a dark rlmid, hut noon reap
peared alwve th cloud, and miterad the
ejouda still higher, until It wna mare
speck against th sky. Horn smittly
by the wind, It was carried nwity be
yond tbo view of the enthusiastic mul
titude, and descended, In threa-quar-turn
at an hour, Into n field fifteen
miles dlsttiiit.
Hut a grantor marvel was to come.
Joseph MostcvWer visited Pnrlo to ro-
poat his experiment under the nusptoes
of tho National Academy. On tho 10th
of September, on a platform In front
ot tho palaco of Vorimlllos, a llnon 1ml
loon, gully printed and decorated, wns
rondy for Inilntlon by smoko. A 1ms
kot waa attac'ed to It, In which woro
n sheep, a cock and a duok. This
balloon wns seventy-five feet high nnd
forty-throo feet wide tho largest that
had yot beon made. Tho sound of n
ennnou nt ono o'ctork nnnuuncod to the
vast crowd that the Area woro lighted
and tho Inilntlon bogun. Kleven in In
titoa nttor a second i;;in Informed tlism
thnt tho balloon was full. At the
sound ot n third the rope were cut
nnd the balloon, with It living freight
roso slowly nnd majestically lo the
holght ot fifteen hundred feot. nnd than
doscomlod obliquely to tho onrth nt a
dlstnnco ot two miles. The animal
woro unhurt. The sheep wns found
composedly feeding In n Held.
Tho striking succose of thta oxperl
mont lod to ono still moro remnrhnbla
Josoph Moutgolflor mndo n new 1ml
loan of tho emtio dimensions ns tho
last, but ot much moro solid nnd euro
ful construction, nud provided It with
n turgor car of basket work. Ono dny
In Novemlier, 178a, whllo tho Inventor
wna making nu experimental Inflation,
n gallant young nnturnlUt, Pnlatro do
Hosier by mime, leaped Into tho enr,
nnd tho bnlloon was allowed to ascend
to tlo holght of three hundred fect,
whoro It was hold by n ropo for a
whllo nnd tltru drawn down. This de
termined tho young man to attempt nn
nscont. A major In tho French nrmy,
the Mnrquls d'Arlnndos. volunteered
to Join him In the daring nnd perilous
ndvonturo. Novombor tho 21st all
Paris wau again abroad to view tho
spe-taclo. Tho sky waa loworlng ami
tho wind was high. Provided with
plenty of sand ballast and with tHraw to
renew tho Inflation tho two bmvo
young men took tholr places In tho
car, nnd the rope wero cut. A gust
of wind caught tho balloon boforo It
cleared tho houses and tho nilventur
or nnrrowly escaped dostructlon by
boltig dashed against them. Tho bal
loon was secured, howovor, and drawn
lo tho earth. Undismayed by this
mishap, they again entered tho car, nnd
tho balloon woi n second tlmo fct go.
Tho wind had lulled, and the balloon
now roso steadily and slowly almost In
n perpendicular lino, whllo tho imvl
gators waved their hats and n univer
sal cheer broko from the niultltudo bo
low. Wonder, admiration and affright
woro expressed on ovory countenance.
Tho balloon continued to nscend, now
lost In n cloud, now reappearing abovo
It, now shining In tho sun, now eclips
ing that luminary by floating between
It nnd tho spectators, antll it dim
inished to n speck and wits finally lost
to view. Meanwhile tho norlal travel
era fed their fire nnd Inflated tholr
balloon, until, In the thin nlrot tho up
per region. It threatened to burst. It
caught flro, hut a wet spongo nullified
to oxtlngulsh tho flames. The so'dlcr,
It Is said, wa the flrst to propose to de
aeend, alarmed by the exeebslve Infla
tion and tho noise ot tho expanding
linen. Tho nuturnllst at length yield
wl to his entreaties, the flro waa ex
tlngulahed, and the balloon desoended
rapidly toward the city. To ooeape
the house tops they were compelled to
light their flro again, and tbey hovered
over Paris for some minutes before a
timely breeze wafted them beyond the
walla. They alighted In perfect safe
ty, after a flight ot twenty-flvo minute
These aeronaut were, ot course, the
lions of the hour, and the whole world
rang with their names, since Franklin
had flown his electrical klto In I'hlln
delphta no scientific eveat had so star
tied and amazed mankind. The broth
era .Montgolfler were rewarded by tho
government with potulons and decora
tions, and a sum of forty thousand
francs was given them to enable them
to continue their experiment.
Thus balloons were Invented. The
flying maohlno Is undergoing a devel
opment that many uellevo will soon
reach perfection. It Is reasonable,
however, to expect that tho day will
come when the Invention ot tho Mont
gainers will And Its Watt to bring It
to perfection and Its Fulton to tarn It
to nrrount
Stephen Montgolfler died In 1799
Joseph spent the remainder ot his life
course of whleh ho Invented tho hj
dnville ram. He died in 1810.
MEADE AND HIS MEN.
Ttin t'oiuitiniiitef s I'm nk Anwr to
OiiuinliiliilnE IJiK-tiir.
Oen. Mde waa a iskvst nn ompllshedl
oflWr. II had been thoroughly edu
cated m hla profession, nnd had n com
plete knowledge of both the silcncoandl
art of war In nil Its branches, says the
Century. Ha wa well rend, possessed
of u vast Amount ot Interesting infor
mation, had cultivated his mind ns a I
linguist and spoke Frrnrh with fluency. I
When foreign olllccrs vlnlted tho front I
thev wero invariably rimmed by their I
Interviews with the commander ot thai
Army of the Potomac He wns n dis
ciplinarian to the iKiint uf srwrity. was!
entirely ntibordlnate to JiIh superior,!
and no one wa more prompt than ho
to oliey order to the letter. In his Hi;!
lerrouree witn in oiilcers Die uiun'n-Ss
of th soldier wo nlwaya conspicuous. I
and lie uever took pains to smooth nn
one' milled feeling.
There wna an olllrer serving In thol
Army of the Potomac who had former
ly Iwen it aurgeon. Ono day ho np-
inared nt Meade' headquarter In n
high aute of Indignation and said-
Oonernl, as I wa riding over hero
tome of the mon In tho adjoining!
camp shouted nfter mo nnd called inol
'Old Pills' nnd I would like to lmvo It I
stopped." Meade Just nt thnt moment!
was not In tho best possible framo of I
mind to bo nppronched with such al
complaint. He seized hold ot tho eye-j
gimmes, conspicuously largo In alze.l
whleh ho nlwnys wore, clapped thcml
astride of his none with both hnnds.l
glared through thorn nt tho officer nndl
exclaimed: "Well, what of It? IHwI
can I prevonl It? Why. I hear that!
when I rodo out tho other dny somo otl
the men ended mo n 'd - d old goggle-
eyed snnpplug-turtle.' nnd I enn t even!
stop that!" Yho ofllcer had to content!
himself with thla explosive expression!
of a sympathetic follow fooling nnd to!
lake his chance thereafter as to ob
noxious eplihetfl.
Mr. C'lKiiirnt' frenoiit to III) Wlf
It must hnve lieen because tbo nu-l
thor of the "Personal ltocollwtions oil
Joan of Arc" wns on his travels Ml thel
uttermost pari of tho earth when the
nnrraUvo was publlfihcd In book form!
that ono of his Intentions nbout it wan
not nt that tlmo carried out. It wan
his purpose, when ho begnn work orJ
llio Htory in Florence in 18P3. that id
should bo a silver wedding present tiJ
l.i- ... I 1
ua iviic. j io says nun alio pevpil
Know or ins tiosign. nud when tlul
book was published thero was nothing
in ii in appnso ucr or it. "I.ct ml
rectify." writes Mr. demons fronl
Ixindon, under dnto of April 0. nndl
ngrccauio to ins wish, n loaf will hi
inserted into futuro Issues ot tlul
"Iloeollcotlona of Joan," bearing thlJ
inscription:
1870 TO MY WIFR 1895
OLIVIA LANU DON CLH.MHN3
THIS IIOOIC
Is tendered on our wedding anni
versary In grateful recognition ot
Imr twenty-flvo years ot valued
servloe us my literary advisor nnd
editor, lil
this AUTiioii.
Harper's Weekly.
A lllrtiail Ho po.
First Auditor (at tho drama) -I
"Never saw such mlsorablo acting Inl
my llfo. loot's go." Second Auditnr-1
"Lel'4 wait till tho next act. There's i
flood soeno with real water In that ami
mnybo somo of 'em will get drowned.'
Now York Weekly.
A I.nra Mngnilim.
Oadzooks "I bought a magazine onl
the train today which numbered 20C
pngos." Zounds-"That Is nn extra!
largo slzo for n magazine. You must!
lmvo found at least twenty or thirty!
pages of roadlng matter In It." -Nonl
York Tribune.
EPHRAIM'S EPIOnAMS.
It am a mighty sranht tailor dat klol
patch er bad habit.
Clothes' makes or womnn, 'n' want
of dem make or llvln' plctah.
lit yo' all donn broko de nu'shell yol
nil kalnt tell et It kontalns meat ot
wohms.
Kr man that makej his mahk in thol
wori' am de man dat Is ca'ful erboutl
picking his tn'fiot.
Hand luck low down, mls'ble hahdl
luck am de on'y euro known to' dat
disonse called genius.
Hf ouah ol' tomcat put on kid glovea
It's dollahs too doughnuts ho wuuldn't
kotoh a mouso In to' yeahs.
Br babktn' dawg won't bite, but of
yo' al am tryin' toe go toe sleep datl
Imhk am a hing sight de wussoh.
Jus' ez soon cz er man l'arns how
toe live V 'predate life erlong cornea!
de undahtakah 'n' rings the front do'l
bell.
W'en er man runs In do dank 'n'l
falls down, et ain't no consolation to
rcmembuh de X-ray nab bin dlsoov-l
ah'd.
Hf all de fo'ks on earth slept at del
same tlmo dat would bo a occasion w'en
one man would bo Jus' as good ei nn-l
othah.
"Khly toe bed 'u' ehly to rise" ami
ono ot nature's bes' laws, but er colo'dl
go'man dat goes toe bed wit de ohlok-
ens am liable too git hlse't In trouble.!
Uah's sunthln' wrong wit do reli
gion dat Insplnhs er woman toe chase
oft toe make oystah soup to a chu'ea
festival whlli her chll un has toe eat
mush n' milk or go hungry to bed
Walnuts and butternuts are being
siifeeeafully niltlvated in Whatcor
I rouuty Washington Thoy bre tint na
H.jfiirt it wes fiught t