THE CLI7T0N CLARION
WEDNESDAY, MAY 23, 1888.
BllCXjre Talks Afcaat t'awawjra.
The cable news from London
would seem to indicate that tbe
coming year will witness a begira
of armed goslins from England
who intead to proeeente the cow
gentleman and Dead wood stage
robbing business on tbe frontier.
It is perhaps unnecessary to state
that Buffalo Bill, the graceful and
courteous hirsnit wonder from
Nebraska, is largely responsible
for this. Whererer he has gone
with bis eccentric, dark red, self-
made Indians and his Bpecltled
broncos be has sown the seeds of
discontent in the grammar schools
and bred open rebellion and muti
ny in the primary department.
Look along tbe red-hot trail of
B. William and yon find tbe Amer
ican and foreign youth alike turn
ing with undisguised loathing
from his educational pursuits to
immerse his legs in a pair of shap
erajos, to wield the brief bnt start
ling quirt, to whoop np the red-
eyed, haughty and high-tailed
Texas maverick, or to shoot large
irregular boles into tbe otherwise
poorly ventilated savage.
Gentle reader, we stand upon
the crumbling brink of a great
cowboy eruption from England,
Ireland, and Scotland the conti
nant of the great orient itself. .. I
did not think that Buffalo Bill had
any idea when he started in to
rehearse his great society drama
and horse play, that it would so
soon disturb international rela
tions and throng onr cactus forest
and grease-wood vineyards with
jnvenile cowboys from Green
land's icy mountains and India's
corral stands. If be had he would
have hesitated about it. Now,
alas! it is too late. He is billed
for tbe Coliseum, and already
people from Lyrsilla and the cit
ron groves of Lawrence county
are coming into town, bringing
their dinners and hitching their
teams to tbe fence behind the
Hard, bine preserved seats I am
told are being erected around the
ampbiteatre, and the Roman
schools are closed. Everything
points towards a great festal day,
if that wonld be the right kind of
day to use in this place. Is it to
be wondered at that we will soon
see Roman cowboys, who ought to
be in school, landing here on our
coast and inquiring at the corner
of Broadway and Chambers street
where they can .find an Indian
outbreak to quell? May we not
look for the Arabian and Chinese
contingent by next spring, armed
to the teeth and asking at an in
telligence office when the Dead
wood stage is expected, so that
they can attack it and rob it a few
I saw one of these kindergarten
cowboys get off a train onca and
go up through the town. After
wards I saw bim come back. He
looked different somehow. When
he got off at the station I noticed
that be bad long hair which was
tied back with a pale blue watered
Bilk ribbon. He bad long legs
which seemed to extend from his
Adam's apple to the ground. A
narrow, fonr-in-hand necktie de
noted where his legs terminated
and the head began. He looked
real sweet When he took the re
turn train there was nothing to
identify him except a strawberry
mark, which he carried carefully
concealed up in a shawl strap.
Boys who sigh to dash madly
across the plains to follow the cow
path to fame do not know the
danger and desolation such a life
involves. There are two classes
of cowboys in the west, viz., the
working cowboy and the lay-figure
cowboy. The latter remains in
town and rolls cigarettes while he
smokes fiercely through bis nose.
He talks learnedly of cattle brands,
corrals, round-ups "cawayards,"
ranges, bands, bunches and herds,
but really don't know a range cow
from a Texas steer.
Tbe genuine cowboy is not al
ways beautiful, but be is conver
sant with his business, knows
every brand in his district at least
and who owns it; is brave where
bravery is most needed, that is, in
the discharge of his duty. To stand
watch all night in a blizzard and
bold a band of restless, bellowing
cattle from stampeding, to ride all
the next day half asleep in his
saddle,to fall occasionally from bis
pony when the latter makes a mis
take and steps into a praire dog
village, or to have a collar bone
broken when fifty miles from a
physician, are some of the fea
tures of cowboy life which the
boys who run away from school to
cross the Missouri do not consider
Moreover, it would be well if
very boy in America or elsewhere
would write in his own hat with a
hlue pencil thst there is no rose
lordered road to success, and that
even tbe man that is born beauti-1
fnl and marries rich has to fight
his way. The great west does not
so sorely need pretty men with
buckskin clothes as it does good
citizens who are willing to work,
wherever tbe sun shines the grass
grows or water runs, the young
man who will give a good day's
work for a fair day's wages will
surely be promoted as he deserves
it It may not be funny, bnt it is
the never dying truth that indus
try, integrity and perseverance
are mighty good substitutes for
symmetry, genius and hair. Bill
Nye in New York World.
A 4rat Taaarl.
There is talk of tunneling under
New York. The plan proposed is
for a system of double tunnels cut
through the solid rock under tbe
East and North rivers and under
the city at a depth of sixty feet
below tbe street surface, connect
ing the Long Island railroad with
tbe New York Central and Hud
son River railroad, the elevated
roads and the railroads coming
into Jersey City from the South
and West . These tunnels, it is
proposed, shall be lighted by
electricity, and only electric mo
tive power shall be used in them,
while large elevators are to be
placed wherever the tnnnel crosses
the lines of the elevated roads, to
transfer passengers to the elevated
trains. This system of double
tunnels, the engineers of the com
pany estimate, can be bnilt and
equipped for 1,000,000 a mile, or
total cost of from $5,000,000 to
$6,000,000. The projectors of the
tunnels, the New York and Long
Island Railroad company, a new
corporation, claim that the tun
nels, being so far underground,
can do no possible injury to the
streets or to private property upon
the surface, and they therefore
hope to get the consent of the
city and private property owners
in time to begin the work of con
struction about the time the aque
duct contractors finish their pres
It is also proposed to have stor
age chambers opening into the
tunnels for the storage and hand
ling of freight and General Roy
Stone, the president of tbe com
pany, predicts that in time there
will be another New York under
ground, where all railroad freights
will be transferred, and where
goods not injured by dampness
will be stored.
Am laterrapted Orator.
As is well known, Edwin Rego,
the day watchman at the Capitol,
has a set speech, which he delivers
whenever an eastern visitor enters
the rotunda of the bnilding and
begins an inspection of the mag
nificient group of Columbus and
Queen Isabella statuary presented
by D. O. Mills to tbe state. Rego's
address comprises a recital of
what tbe statue represents; how
it came to be made; where it was
made; who made it, etc. A few
days since an elderly lady, well
dressed and of respectable appear
ance, walked leisurely into tbe
building and up to the statue.
She deliberately adjusted herJ
spectacles and began a critical
examination of the beautiful work
in marble. She was so engaged
when Rego appeared, and, after
politely saluting the lady, entered
upon his descriptive address. The
old lady was an attentive and ap
parently interested listener until
the orator began reciting a history
of the sculptor Larkin G. Mead.
Here he was interrupted by his
audience, who said: "Oh, I know
all about him. Larkin is my
nephew. I have seen lots of his
work, and I'm just from bis old
home away down in Yarmonnt
now. Land sakes! Who'd a
thought that I'd found any of his
sculpturing away ont here? Ire
member the first time be ever
made a publio exhibition of his
talent in that line. We had had a
big snow-storm in Yarmonnt, and
and then it turned off kind of
warm like. Well, a lot of boys
went to work and rolled up a lot
of big snow-balls, many feet in
diameter, and piled them upon
each other until they were many
feet high. Then they put a big
square piece of snow on top of al'.
After this Larkin climbed away
np on the mass of snow and carved
out a statue of Ethan Allen. It
was as life-like as could bo, and
anybody who had ever seen the
picture of the old soldier could
tell in a minute what the statue
was. Well, it kept 6nowiog and
snowing that winter, and every
time it wonld cease Larkin wonld
climb np on the 6taf rte and chisel
it into shape. The result was that
before the winter was over tbe
statue had grown to colossal pro
portions, and people used to travel
miles and miles to see it. ' That's
where Larkin's reputation bpgan,
and as be was a good boy he de
served all the fame be won after
ward." When Rego again got the floor
be thanked tbe lady for the addi
tion fclie had made in his speech,
after which the visitor from Ver
mont turned her attention to other
portions of the State Capitol.
Tbe act to establish courts for
Indians on the various reserva
tions is now before congress. Tbe
act aims at civilizing the Indians
by giving them the protection of
the law afforded other citizens,
allowing them to make contracts,
to sue and be sued and to engage
in any trade or business. It pro
vides for the appointment of court
commissioners, to act aa judges,
and for the appointment of their
clerks, who shall be Indians by
preference, and who Bhall have
the power of justices of the peace.
A district attorney, called tbe
Next Friend," will be appointed
and may institute suits and prose
cutions on behalf of Indians.
This will amuse the Indians very
much wnen they read it in the
Enterprise. Silver City Enter
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Bllleas Uraaarne, DIs
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explanation of the remei
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Pellets over so treat a variety of diseases. It
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. en of Dr. aate's Catarrh
r Bemedy, for a case of Ca
tarrh t the Head which
they cannot cure.
SYJITTOWa OF CATARM.-Dull, heavy
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discharges falling from the head into the throat,
sometimes profuse, watery, and acrid, at others,
thick, tenacious, mucous, purulent, bloody and
putrid; the eyes are weak and watery; thereto
a ringing in tbe ears, deafness, hacking or
coughing to clear tbe tbroat, expectoration of
offensive matter, together with scabs from ul
cers ; tbe voice is changed and has a nasal
twang"; tbe breath is offensive: smell and
taste are impaired , there is a sensation of dizat
ness, with mental depression, a hacking cough
and general debility. Only a few of tbe above
named symptoms are likely to be present In
any one case. Thousands of cases annually,
without manifesting half of tbe above symp
toms, result In consumption and end in tbe
grave. No disease Is so common, more decep
tive and dangerous, or less understood by phy
sicians. By Its mild, soothing and healing properties.
Dr. Sage's Catarrh Kemedy cures the worst
eases of Catarrh, "Cold la the Head,"
Ceryaa, and Catarrhal Headache.
Bold by druggists everywhere ; SO cents.
Tnteld Agony front Catarrh."
Prof. W. Hacsmer, the famous mesmerist,
of Ithaca, N. Y., writes: Borne ten years ago I
suffered untold agony from chronic nasal ca
tarrh. My family physician gave me up as
incurable, and said I must die. My case was
such a bad one, that every day, towards sunset,
my voice would become so hoarse I could
barely speak above a whisper. In tbe morning
my coughing and clearing of my throat would
almost strangle me. By the use of Dr. Sage's
Catarrh Remedy, In three months, X was a well
man. and the cute has been permanent.'
- CsastaaUy Hawking and spitting-"
Thomas J. Bcshiko, Esq., 2902 Pine 8treet,
St. Louts, Mo., writes : I was a great sufferer
from catarrh for three years. At times I could
hardly breathe, and was constantly hawking
and spitting, and for the last eight monthsconld
not breathe through the nostrils. I thought
nothing could be done for me. Luckily, I was
advised to try Dr. Sage's Catarrh Bemcdy, and
I am now a well man. I believe it to be the
only sure remedy for catarrh now manufac
tured, and one has only to give It a fair trial to
experience astounding results and a permanent
A complete Treatise on Catarrh, giving valu
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of Importance, will be mailed, post-paid to any
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World's Drjasasarv ledleal lands tisa,
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brand W C on left hip. Ear marks Crop
Range on the Gila river near Duncan.
Post Office address Dunean, Graham Co.,
IV. C. W. SMITH,
Post office addreBs. Solomonville, Graham
County, Arizona. Kange, north Bide Gra
Cattle branded V O on left side, ear mark
nnder half crop the right, swallow fork the
left. Horse brand, same as cow brand, on
d) i AAA REWARD! W I de
I I 1 1 1 1 I sire to call attention to
f I I 1 1 1 1 I my marks and brands
J-i J J J for cattlef as shown in
cat. I sell no stock
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reit and conviction of any person or persons
unlawfully handling cattle in the following
brands and marks.
J. H. HA3IPHOX.
P. O.ilQ Paso, Texas. Ranch P.O.: Thom
Range, on Eagle creek, Graham county
Ear marks, crop and split left, crop right.
Horse brand, 4 on the left shoulder.
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