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Arizona weekly enterprise. (Florence, Pinal County, Arizona Territory) 1881-1893, December 10, 1881, Image 1

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FLORENCE, PINAL COUNTY, ARIZONA TERRITORY, SATURDAY, DECEMBER 10, 1881.
NUMBER 37.
VOLUME I.
PROFESSIONAL.
esKvr o. Howard, n.unca p. hayne,
HOWARD & HAYNE,
ATTORSltTS ASD Col HbFLoRS AT LAW, CORNIER
Sixth mil Knruont treet, TomVwtcne, A. T.
A. H. PARKER,
MlNISO KKOIKEKR AND V. B. liEVCTY yiXERAL
ri:rvcyr. Ouice in Han Frnnouwo Jewelry
Hur, No. 4.H0 Allen street, nouth side, between j
Fcmrtli and Fifth nit. . Tunbetone, A. T.
JOHH II. MILLHL LUCAS. ;
LUCAS & MILLER,
ATTORSKTS AM) OorMNKLORi! AT LAW. omCK,
mnm 5 ami 7 Uird limltling, corner of Kremuut
and Fourth. Tonilxtone. A. T.
ItW nTpAVIS. GIO. R. WILLIAMS.
WILLIAMS A DAVIS,
Attorn FYs AT law. wiw's few bcildiso,
mintfro! Fourth and Frmnout Tumbtonc,
A. T.
WELLS 8PICER,
ATTOSSrT ASO OuCVftKLOa AT LAW, 213 flFTH
Hxet, Tonilanuno, l'n-hie Co., A. T. AIim
Notnrr Piihlio; U. 8. Cunmdseiouer of PJ
lor CalK'T'
J. C PARKE,"
Crvn. esoikekr ani o. s. wnnuif tivkyoh
fnu-vevinK dune ii nil itn branch. Oftuw, 5iM
Fremont treet, TotnUtntie, Anxona.
ft. T. HENDERSON.
IIitwiciak aud mjbokos. ornt'E, 60 rat
nwnl itwt, ToiubeUne. Arifcwuv
A. 0. WALLACE,
Jnsnca or Tin nuci rouitni struct,
three kor below Fremont, Tombstone, A. T.
JOHN M. MURPHY
ATTOnMT AT LAW, ROOM 28, MlOWS's IK TCI.
Tombrtone, Arianu.
L. F. BLACKBURN,
tnrvrr lUERirr and and coLi.avro. omc
with A. T. Joirae, office Htwchaa Lumber Co..
Fourth atroet, below Fremont All official
Wine promptly attended to. Collection a
epec'aHy.
). F. HUTTON,
ATToaurr at law. omc os fifth strekt,
between Fremont and Allen, Ttmbstone, Ari-
G. E. GOODFELLCW, M. D.
OTTK IK VUKEIbt
k-Mt, Tombftoue, A. T.
P. T. COLBY,
Attormt at law. will tractu r is ail
tte oum of the Territory. Uttiwj lu (tird'
bniMtng, riAUiin U and J, corner of Fourth
and Fremont BtrcetA, 'i'mif)toiie, A. T.
Okmxo Hatmoko, A. M. Wauieu,
tMcrnteHto Oivy. T..iulrtone.
WALKER & HAYiaOKD,
AtT.R(!ITH AT LAW. fROMKT ATTEKTIO OIT
m to jll buM!n. intrtiHtexl to tbxiu. Ojlsc
ttniu d.mU) a ji(Jiy. A. M. Walker Com
fniloitr of ile-1e for the Stte oi Neva-ia.
A. J. FELTC3,
JWTW'K OF THE PEACE, KUTABT Ft'SLIC AND
Kcal Et:U AsvnU i'tjice on Fn inout rtreet,
Wtwteo Fourth anil Fit lb, Tututtn, A. T.
BR. R. II. MATTHEWS,
PBTKICIAH AKD HCOf.EOX, TOXDSTH.NF, ARIRZO-
na. Ottioa with W. Street, Fourth wrevt, neivr
Allen.
a O M2LVESKY. 0. TRAJiTVM.
O'MELVENY & TRANTUM,
Attor-ets at law. booms S am 4 cird's
NK'idhiv, ewner Fourth and Fremont uti-eeta,
Tombtone, A. T.
S. M. ASHENFELTER,
Attorket at law, mrroic, a. t.' trompt
attention given to any bkuiiwm entrUhtcJ to uir
eim.
MiLTON B. CLAPP,
HOTAEY PUBLIC, CONVEYANCER
ADD EIRE I.NM.-UAKCE AOENTtL
0& at Saffoni, JIuiWn & Ca'a Bank,
Tombstone, A. T.
Thomu Wallace.
MlSIHU BROKER, REAL ESTATE AOEKT AND
(Vnryaii?r. Allen irtreet, Tonilietoce.
Rodman M. Price. Jr
Civil ehoineer axd v. . oeputt miner-vl
Hurreynr. Office VoUard building, Allen street,
Tom be tone, A. T.
Ta. O. Hjward,
(Late of 1 oi AiiKrloR)
Attarkey at law. at present at the oe
fioa of J. W. Htuinp. Toinlietone, A. T.
W. A. Harwood,
NOTAIT ri'BLIC, CUR.NER FOl'hTH AND ERE
Btont etreetn, Tomletone, A. T.
T. J. Drum,
Attorket at law. office i viceer's
hnilding, 431 Fremont atreet, Tombetone, A. T
E. P. Voisard.
AhhATER AND HOTART FUBUC, ALLEit DTREET,
TombBtoue, A. 1 .
.Charle Ackley,
OmLBOI!ERR AXD DEPf'TT IT. a. MINERAL
Snrreyor, Touibntoue, A. T. Otfioe on Fre-
uumt atreet, between Hixth aiul Seventh.
J. V. Vickors,
Real etate aoext, auctioneer, convey.
anor and Mining Oerator. Fremont etreet,
ruth, iomlmtone, A. I.
A. G. Lowery,
AtTORNET AT LAW, FREMONT STREET, BETWEEN
Fourth and Filth, Tombstone, A. T. Will
racttoe in all oonrta. Agent for mining prop
arty. Conveyancing and collecting promptly
attenoeq to. Keterenoea griven.
E. U. BMITH.
W. EARL.
O. W.
8TAUL0IN0.
Earl, Smith & Spaulding,
ATTOBNETS and OOL'NBELORM at law. office
in Drake a block on Pennington street, Tucaou,
Ajiaona leintory.
John Roman,
ATTOBNET AT LAW, TUCSON, ARIZONA.
Webb Street,
Attorney at law, 113 fourth street, TOM'
atuue, Arizona.
J. W. Stamp,
Attorney and corssFi-oB at law, room
and 4, f.pituph Bmldmc, Fremont tret't,
Temhatone, A. T. Will practice in all the
court of the Territory, and attend to buameas
before the Department at Washinirton. D. C.
Special attention (fiven to U. 8. patent and
panmim oui;nen.
Dr. Gillingham,
Db. oillworam (late of vircinia CITY) 18
now amoeiated, in the practice of Medicine
and Saiverv. with Dr. UUdersleeve. Olfice,
Kultaph bmliling, Tombstone, A. T.
Dr. F. Heller,
SOBOBOM AND FHYSICI.MI. OKriCE ON
Mreet. blow Allen, Tombstone, A. T.
O. BUCKALEW.
BUCKALEW & OCHOA,
Florence, Pinal County, A, r,
Silver Kin gt Final County t A, T Cass Grande Pinal County, A, T,
Globe t Gila County, A, 2
A Full Stock of Dry Goods
COOTS, AND SHOES, HATS AND CAPS, CLOTHI5G, FANCY GOODS, HOISEKY, AND MINING SUPPLIES,
HARDWARE, GROCERIES, LIQUORS, TOBACCO AND CIGARS. ALSO FLOUR, GRAIN,
LUMBER, AGENTS FOR FALK'S MILWAUKEE EXPORT BEER. ETC.,
SILVER
WWW Mm&W-M
Groceries, Liquors, Cigars
GRAIN, FLOUR, MINING SUPPLIES, Etc.
The GLOBE STORE
fil'Oilliii Stat ss, ftoss.' Ifetsu
Ilats, Caps, Hardware, Wagon Material,
ining Supplies, Groceries of Every Description,
FL0VB AND GRAIN, IN FACT TO SUFPLY THE WANTS OF T1IEPE0PLE IS0UR GREATEST AIM
AT CASA GRANDE WE ARE DOING A
Groceries, Provisions, Grain, Flour, Produce, Gent's
Prompt Attention
WE
FOB DELIVEBT"
Mark Goods "Care of B. & O. Casa
GENERAL
WILL ALWAYS BE FOOD-
KING
KEEPS COKSTAXTLT OK HASD A FT IX USE OF
BOOTS. SHOES, HATS,
NEVER FAILS TO HAVE A GOOD STOCK OF
iS
4-
V vi '"yy ;C "(fty 0 '
BE1XO ALWAYS SUPrLIED WITH
Furnishing Goods,
Given to Goods Consigned t6 our Care
ARE ALWAYS PREPARED TO CONTRAGT
03J1 uVE-A.CI3:i2srEI?,"5r
TO ANY POINT IN THE TERRITORY.
JOSEM.OCHOA.
STORE
CAPS,
and Tobaceo,
Etc
OH AJETX" FREIGHT
Grnnde, A. T.
'j'-'i
ANACREONTIC.
BT THOMAS MOOKX. r
Frwl of my toul I tliifl goblet p ;
Twill chiu-- 'hut pensive tear ; C
T1 not to iWMtM woman' lip, J;
But, oh! 'tis more sincere.
Like her delueive beam,
'Twill steal away thy mind;
But, like affection's dream.
It leases no sting bt-hiud!
Come, twin, the wreath thy brown to -hade,
1 bete flow.! wer culled it noon ;
Like wcniau'e love the rose will fad,
But, ah ! n;t ha.f bo aeon I
F-jr though the flower's decayed.
Its fragrance i Dot o'er
But one. when love's betrayed.
The heart can bloom no mora.
How My Ghost Was Laid.
He fell flat on the ground before me,
clasped his bands to his forehead, and
uttered a horrible grcun. lever on the
Btnge did murdered villain fall so sud
denly or 'with such a whack.
I began to shake all over. I was, in
fact, frightened almost to death. Had
I killed him? Had I really killed John
Rogers ? I was youcg enough to think
it possible. I did not then feel quite as
csnre as I do bow that V Men have died
and worms have etten them, but not for
love." My 16th birthday was just past,
and John Kogers was only 21. He was
not exactly a milk-maid ; Biddy called
him the "milk ceutlcinan : " but he
milked his mother's cow, and waa con
descending enough to tiling it to our
door in a tin cui every evening. We did
not keep a cow. The rnilway rau at
the toot of our propvriy, and we had had
the pleasure of seeing thr?e Aldoracys
immolated on cow catebew ; and, ss Mis.
Ropers remarked that "though she was
a lady to the backbone, and jestasgoodas
anybody in that, neighborhood, ef not a
leetle better, bhe did not mind It tting ns
have her extra miik," we gave' up our own
experiments in cow-ketpinj; and were
served by John Rogf-w. Part of the
bargain understood, though unexpressed,
was that the milk-bringing ws to be
Uken in the light of a call. A memlxr
of the family received the can, and re
marked sagely that it was warm, cold,
rainy, or that we net;dcd nun, and asked
how Mrs. Rogers found herself. When
one sovereign obliges another great cer
emony is required.
I think I never shall forget the linen
snitu, made as well as washed and ironed
by his mamma, in which John Rogers
always appealed ; his head of curly red
hair ; hh big blue eyes, very round and
wide open ; his long, lei hands and
wrists, and the length of stocking, ankle
ard shoe string wiiih finished him off.
He generally wore a pink in his button
hole. He was romantic, and had a vol
ume of Tennyson and another of Tom
Moore, which he was fond of quoting ;
and so we come ag ia to the reason of
his falling flat on the ground at my feet
in that piece of woou'and, and which
was called in the neighborhood Peck's
grove.
I had not been wandTln there arm-in-arm
with John Rogt-rs, but I had a
habit of taking my book there on sultry
afternoons, and he had fallen into an
other habit of going home that way after
seiving the mixk. fometiinos he had a
book iu his pocket and would take it out
and favor me with a selection. Lady
Clara Vere de Vere was his favorite. I
was not particularly delighted with this
attention, but our suf.ply of milk was
dependent on our civility, and I wa
civil ; and so it had come to this John
Rogers had proposed to me. There, in
the woodland, he had offered mo his
heart and hand, and J had said :
" Oh, Mr. Rogers, please don t. I I
couldn't possibly think of marrying. I'm
too young. Mamma and papa call me
their little girl.
"j(ever you mmd, Celina. Old folks
never Kin understand young lolks is
growed up," replied John Rogers. " We
kin wait. We kin keep company a year
or two. I'm in hopes grand'ther '11 step
off by that time, and we'll hev the med
der farm. Dunno as we need even ter
mention it jst now."
" Oh, I don t mean that, Mr. Rogers,
I said, in terror. "I don't want to
wait. I mean I " here I thought of
the milk. ." I regard you with tne grcat-
A 1 ' V 1 , J. .
est respect o a ueignoor, uuv on, no.
Mi Rogers, uou t put your arm around
my waist. .1 can t allow it ; but I
couldn't think of marrying you at any
time.
" Hay !" cried John Rogers.
He said it so sharply tliat I started.
" Ah, I see that I am right !" cried
John Rogers. " You've been a-trithng
with my feebngs. You've led me on to
thin to crush me under your heel. You
thort to break a country heart for pars
time ere you went to teown. "
" Oh, Mr. Rogers !" I cried, in des
peration, "you know I'm not going to
town ; we always live here.
"It's all the" same, "said John Rogers;
You beld your oonre wilhout remorse,
Xn make me truftt my nirdedt worth ;
And last you fixed a vuoant ttUre,
And ew me with jour noble birth.
Miss Celina Tompkins. Oh, I know
you."
" Dear me, Tm sure it's very dreadful
of you to say so. Mr. Rogers," I said.
" Then you repent?" said John Rog
ers. " You ain't a goin to yield to this
here pride of birth. When folks' rela
tions are ministers and doctors they do
feel sot up by it generally, but
Howe'er It be It tte'ms to ma
'Us only not le to be good,
Kind heart are more than
Than d -otora' aU'n", and simp's
Faith more than donuiiieti' biood.
Youll cast aside all them there preju
dices of caste and hev me, whether or
no?"
" Oh, no, Mr. Rogers," I sobbed
"oh, no. I'm sure" the milk rose be-
tore my memory again " 1 m sure no.
family could be more respected than
yours; but I never mean to marry at
all."
" It's final, then?" said John Rogers.
" Oh, yes, indeed it is. I'm very sor
ry, but indeed it is, said JL
Instantly, without' warning, Mr. Rog
ers threw his book one way and his
milk-kettle the other, and fell flat before
me in the road.
" Get up, Mr. Rogers." I cried, whon
he had been perfectly motionless for full
nve minutes. " Oh, get up, ct up!
And to my relief he answered, but
what he said was really terrible:
" Mies Celina Tompkins!
Tbt-re tunds a Hytreter in your ha'l,
Tbe ff-.ii t oi Uoo-1 is at yuur duor
You're k:l!ed me!"
Had I killed John Rogers? As
said before, I was young enough to be
lieve it possible. Por an hour I stayed
there tMiking him with my pink-lined
parasol, snedUmg not tears beggm.
him to rise. He onl v moaned. Finally.
an it was growing quite (lark, I picked
up his book and hb tiu can, put his hat
on the back of his head and hurried
home. At the gate I met a little bov
and gave him a 10-oent piece to run and
tell Mrs. Rogers that something had
happened to her sou, Mr. Rogers, an-
that she'd better go and look for liim in
Pock's grove ;" and I added 5 cents
mr not t. tell who s-iit him. Then 1
went honio. I !', 1 cVuc id! 1 i o:;M do. 1
could not ruarry John Rogeis, but I felt
very guilty.
There was no milk for breakfast nex
morning, nor did Mrs. Rogers a;;aiu
"lotus hava any." Her niautirtrs cer
tainly had not that repose which marks
the caste of Yero de Vero ; and when
die called to collect the bill she gave
my mother an nnlhn.it m pieM of her
mmd, ehding with : " I'd hev you to
know, ma'am, that me and my folks is
jestasgoodas you sud your folks any
day in the year ; and, -ts for my John,
d I'd kuowed what ha r.ts after I'd hev
showed him. A liity-tity piece a nasty
little thing like that 1 Ugh !"
"Has she gone crazy?' panted mam
ma. "What liHve we done?"
And then I burst hito tears.
"Don't biaino her, mamma," I
sobbed. "I've broken poor John Rogers'
heart."
There was a good dual of rain about
that time, and chilis and fever prevailed
to na alarming extent. John Rogers
took them I suppo3 lymjf on the '
ground wax not good for him and had
thorn very badly. Ho enjoyed it, I think
now, but ha was a ton-ili!e, haunting
ghost to mo as he grow tliiauer and
thinner, and yellower and yellower, and
haunted my path with reproachful
gogpie eyes arid 'iVnnypon sticking -eut
of his pocket. I tuiuk niy remorse
might eventually have 1 roken down my
constitution it' p:pa had not decided that
we should all spend a year in iuirope.
I married abroad, and on our return
we all settled in Xow York, and I felt
glad not to r-tura sud face the tomb-
btone of poor .loiin bogcrs.
" I m atraid, i. of'.en said to mv ens-
band, with tears in my eyes "I'm
afraid, love, tnat I have broken one
net heart tliat loved ma well, and
that I may even be responsible for a
life."
Aud I never dared to slaeu alone in
the dark, for I fear of seeing the ghost
of poor John Rogars -pointing to a vol
ume of Tennyson.
How tlie vefcrs fly 1" But mine flew
happily. I was 30 years old, and the
mother ot tnr Je little children, wiien we
one day bethought us to go upon an ex
cursion up the river. The day was fine;
the air delicious ; toe boat a little too
crowded. On our way we stopped at
the landing nearest our old home, and.
though fourteen years had flown, I
thought of John Rogers and grew mel
ancholy. ' That ghost, 1 said to mvsell, " will
never be laid. Yet certainly I did noth
ing wronjr. I never encouraged him,
and I could not marry him. That would
have been impossible."
Meanwhilo the gang-plank, es I be
lieve they call it, was thrown out, and
some people came on board. Among
them was an exceedingly lat, comfortf
ble man of 85 or more ; his wife, a dry.
skinny person, in a bright blue bon '
and a purple grenadine dress, and a
small tribe of children. I should not
have noticed them any more than any of
the rest but for the man's amazing
promptitude in gathering up camp-stools
and the fact that he seated the family
very near our party. Once established,
however, it was impossible to forget
them, for he talked incessautlv.
' Martha Jane, got the basket ? Wal,
I am relieved ; thought you'd left it, and
we'd be obliged to buy our victuals at
tne tavern, charging as they do. Sally,
stop Ecratchin your shoe toes. Do you
think I'm made of money ? Ma, h'ist
Peter onto your lap, won't you ? Next
thing he'll be overboard. Don't scratch
your head so, David. Ma, your vail'll
git blowed on next, and you 11 be both
erin' about a new one."'
" When I bother, I'll get one," replied
a sharp female voice. " Ef I was you I
wouldn't publish my meanness to the
hull boat, John Rogers."
John Rogers ! At the name I turned,
and looked full into the fat man's face.
It was very red and round now. No
hollow hi the cheeks no sharpness in
the temples, but there were the big gog
gle eyes, round and blue as ever. The
nose, with the funny nicks in the nos
trils, and the curious, pale reddish eye
brows, and a good deal of the pale red
dish hair.
"It is John Rogers I " I ejaculated,
involuntarily. It was his turn to be
startled.
" Who on earth ! " he ejaculated.
Then a suddeu ligbt of recognition
appeared on his face.
" Not Miss Celina Tompkins 1" he
cried, and we shook hands. " This
here's my partner," he said, indicating
his wife with a wave of his umbrella ;
"and I see you've got one, ton, and both
our quivers is purty full. We've 'gol.
older, ain't wo, all of ns, since you lived
to Piankville? Grand'ther was fortynate
enough to die next tpring, snd me and
Samanthy stepped oif in August. 1
weigh more'n 1 used to done ; 1 turn the
miller's sca'et at 2'JO. Mrs. Rogeis, this
here is "
I gave him my married name as he
paused, and received a very unfavorable
glance from Mh. Joim Rogers.
Afterward I heard her spouse explain
ing :
" She sot considerably by me when
she was a gal, but she took too many
airs. She was one of them kind that
was all outride aud nothin' solid, so I let
her know I wasn't to be caught. They
did say she most broke her heart. I
dunno."
" If she knowed what I've had to stand
she'd rejoice," n totted the still uumolli
fie4 Mrs. John Rogers. " i'm sure I
wish you'd had her."
A little later I saw them with their
nine (I had an impression that they had
nine) small children, .and one in the
arms, hunting for a place to lunch com
fortubly. aud I turned to my husband
with a sort of gasp.
" My dear," I said, " that's my ghost
that's the person I've always believed
1 murdered.
" The one who died of love lor your
sake ? asked my spouse.
I answered : " The very same John
Rogers. He is laid at last." New York
Ledger.
Josh Billings' "Trump Cards."
After a man gits to be 38 years old he
Kant lorm any new habits much; the
best ne Kan ao is to steer hi2 old ones.
Enny man who kan swap horses or
Keien usn, ana not ue- about it, iz az
puis az men ever git to be in this world.
The sassyest man I ever met iz a hen
pecked husband when he iz away from
nome.
An enthusiast iz an individual who
believes about four times az much az he
kan prove, and he kan prove about four
tunes az mucn az anybodey believes.
Thoze people who are trieiug to get to
heaven on their kreed will find out at
last that tney didn't have a thru ticket.
loo long courtships are not alwuss iu
dicious. The partys often tire outskore-
mg lore tne trot begins.
Young mei, learn to wait : if von un.
dortake to sett a henn before Kho"i7,redv
you will lose yor time and confiiae the
hen bcidcs.
PITH AND PODtT.
A light affair A lamp.
Life's bitterest lesson Biting a per
simmon.
Thk proper remedy for a young lady
who is short .i stature is to get spliced
as soon as possible.
A woman has been arrested in New
York for abducting a little boy. Next
time she'll know enough to take a big
one.
Ths Secretary of the Navy knows
something about one ship, anyhow. We
refer to courtship. . He has had four
wives.
A stbanoeb in St. Louis, thinking he
recognized his coat on the back of a pe
destrian, shouted, "Stop thief 1" and
about thirty of the inhabitants suddenly
disappeared down a side street.
' What would the country have been
without corporations?" inquired Jay
Gould. " What would the world have
been without navigation ?'' Capt. Kidd
might have as sod with equal cogency.
A cxisnt says to his wine-dealer who
proposes to sell him a brand of new
wine : " Tell me, now, this ewine is not
too head , ? Wina Keller, with alsiiritv
" Heady ? Why it's not even wine !"
Ax old bachelor, who particularly
hated literary women, asked an author
ess if she could throw any light on kiss
ing. " I could," said she, loosing archly
at him ; " but I think it's bettor in the
dark."
A schoolboy being set to write a com
position on the ox, after a long strug
gle, produced the following : " An ex
does not taste as good as an oyster, but
can draw a bigger lead, and run twice
as fast."
: A WESTERN OD3.
. I am waiting in the w:idvond w;tli a cluK
I'll meet yi.ti 'raixk the glcaimng nd tua dark;
I'll bit you with my weapon bigeat nub,
Aud knock you pretty mucb across the park.
A thouaan.i ebiijiiig Uus you'U eoon Lecover,
Anil pyrotet-huicfl till yon txnnot rest.
Oh I come ai.d let me hit you for your mother.
My taog:e-ue&ded poet of the veet.
Chicago Tribune.
Deacon Jelly remarked to a penuri
ous companion that the kingdom of
Satan was to be destroyed, and asked
him if he wasn't glad of it. "Yes," he
replied, " L suppose so, but it seems a
p ty to have anything wasted ! "
" Why did Gc-n. Washington cross the
Delaware on the iee da -ing the storm of
an awful night ? " asked a teacher of her
voung class in history. "I reckon,"
piped a small voice la answer, "it was
b cause he wanted to get on the other
side.
STROMG-aromEB wife "Eh, James.
you are great on languages ; what is the
liuTerenoe between exported and trans
ported? buhmissive liuahand " W hy.
my dear, if you should go to Europe yoa
wouid be exported, and 1 well, 1 should
be transported I
As thb family of a very orthodox di
vine were gravely discussing why the
baby Vas so nauglitv, a boy of 12, who
had just commenced to study the steam
engine as well as the catechism, asked,
"Papa, as we all inherit the sin of
Adam, and the baby is such a little fel
low, is there not a greater pressure of
sin to the square inch iu the baby than in
any oE tne rrst oi ub :
" Din you serve in the war, uncle?'
No sab. : I was a cowardly niggah. I
was a Kentucky niggah. And what did
I want to 'list for?' "Were not the
white men fighting for you ?" " S'pose
dey was. Dat was no sign why we
should ngut. JUassa, aid you ever see
two uogs nehun over a bone t " Well,
what's that to do with your fighting? '
"A heap, massa. JUid you ever seede
lone fight?" The questioner left, amid
a general laugh. Cleveland Leader.
A good parson, who had the happy
faculty of saying a kind word for every
body in whose behtlf one could possibly
be said, recently officiated at the funeral
f a farmer who was known as the mean
est and moot miserlv man in the neigh
borhood. Instead of execrating the de
ceased for his extortionate and niggard-.
ly habits, tins kindly disposed clergy
man simply spoke of him as " the best
arithmetician in the country." VaUtkill
llecordcr.
Thb wild 6torm still raged furiously.
Ever and anon the vivid bghtuing, in
fantastic shapes, illumined the darksome
aud augry heavens. At last our young
hero, making a sudden, strategic move
ment, surrounded the band of fifteen
howling red demons, and with no other
weapon than a seven shooter, a cavalry
sword, a dime novel, a Remington rule,
deck of cards, a bowie-knife and a pair
of brass knuckles, he mowed down his
ptnsners like grain before the scythe of
the reaper : then, seizing the fair ttnel-
inda around the waist with one arm and
plunging a bayonet into the breast of a
usty Indian who exhibited signs oi
rel inning consciousness, he vnulted into
the saddle of the swiftest horse iu tbe
Territory, and cried, in a delirium of
triumphant joy" To be continued in
cur next. umsloum Herald.
Manitoba.
The Manitoba lake, which has given
name to the province formed out of the
Red river region, is called alter a small
island whence, in the stillness of the
night, issue strangrly sweet mysterious
sounds. The Opbway Indians woo dwe 1
in that neighborhood believe the island
to be the home of Manitoba, the speaking
god, and will not land or approach it for
any consideration, thinking they w-.-u'd
desecrate or profane It, and they would
meet with some terrible fate for their
impiety. The sound is caused, it has-
been ascertained, by the beating of the
waves on the large pebbles along shore.
These, with fragments of fine-grained,
compact limestone from the cli3'a above,
are rubbed together by the action ol
the water, and give out a tone like that
of distant churh bells. This natural
music is beard when the wind blows
from the north, an 3, as it subsides, low
plaintive notes, resembling the voices it
an invisible choir, are heard. It has
been compared to the chant of the nuns
at Trinita de Monti in Rome, with which
all travelers are familiar. The effect is
impressive. Tourists have been awak
ened at night in the vicinity under the
impression that chimes of liells were
ringing afar off, and that their tones
were rippling over the lake. The mys
tic bell.3 of Manitoba have acquired such
a reputation that travelers are not satis
fied until they are heard, and often spend
days there waiting for the blowing of the
north wind. The Ojibways have a num
ber of poetio legends about their speak
ing god, whon they profoundly revere.
T I .
iAnusiu nave been established in
Itome lor the manufacture of
relics. Painters have for a long time
found it profitable to turn out the works
of old masters to order. These are sold
to wealthy American pork butchers, who
can see no difference between a. Murillo
and a chroma, except that the chrome
a JiHie brighter hb-J more nyhsh, an 1
iromo is
t-Ut niitoh for th vv.rlor f;iin t;lr.
i Lawyer's Experience in A Sleeping-
Car.
. I never did, never could and never
will sleep a second in a sleeping-car
berth. But all of the party said it wa
because I thought I couldn't, and quot
ed many texts of scripture and old saws
to prove that a man could do anything
he resolved upon. As ritual, female per
tinacity and volubility prevailed, and we
tried it. I resolved I would omit no
means of alluring sleep ; that I would
array myself as for my bed at home,-
take my usual night-cap oi cola water,
" Lay me down to sleep," and "pray the
Lord my soul to keep." I put my boot
outside the curtain, crawled up to th
top berth, and, after many contortions
of the body, bumps on the top of m
head and lacerations of my limbs, con
trived to fall in indue and regular order:
1 had been told to he fiat oh my back,
and ol 'ediently'did s. The cars rattled
and jolted ovor the rough road, stoppott
every few miles with a jerk and started:
with a crcater one. until it seemed to
me that my soul and all that was within
me were being agglomerated into one
consistent and uniform jelly. 1 tried
my right side a while and became sa tit
hed mat t-j tly-vT-TOg side. Then 1 '
tried the left and was sorry I Lad left
the right. I then thought it was tK
light, and got up and shivered around
ten minutes trying to fix my overcoat as
a shade to my lamps. A man who slept
opposite my section alternated between'
fearful snoring, strangulations and wild
and copious expectorations. I felt I
had nearly composed mytelf to sleep,'
when it occurred to me that sound and
direction indicated that my boots wera
being utilized by my catarrhal neighbor.
1 hustled down again and drew tuem in
from the storm. Then I became certain
that my money was in peril, that my
pants and vest which conta ned my treas
ures must be taken from the pegs and
stored away behind me in the berth. I
tried for two or three hours to fix things
so that I could go to sleep and enjoy
that peace and rest that are the posses-'
sions of the innocent and good, but
things went on from bud to worse, and
under renewed tortures to' head and
limbs I dressed ine, took a cigar, went
to the smoking-room, threw myself into
a corner and smoked sullenly and silent
ly through the dismal night lieluled
to the Springfield Jiepublican;
How to Mind a Baby. .
First a man must have one to take'
care ot It isn't every one that is fort
unate enough to have one, and when he
does his w.fe is alvays wanting to run
over to the neighbor's five minutes, and
he has to attend to the baby. Uometames
she caresses him, and oftener she says, .
sternly, "John, take good care of the
child till I return." Yon want to re
monstrate, but cannot pluck up courage
while the awful female eye is upon you ;
so you prudently refrain, and merely re
mark: "Don't stay long, my dear."
She is scarcely out of eight when the
luckless babe opens its eves, and its
mouth also, and emits a yell which
causes the cat to bounce out of the door
as if something had stung it You tim
idly lift the cherub, and sing Rn operatic
air ; it does not appreciate it, and yells'
the louda You try to bribe it with a
bit of sugar ; not a bit of use, it spits it
out run get wrathy and shake it 1
stops a second, and you venture an
other, when, good heavens! it sets up'
such a roar that the passers by look up
in astonishment You feel desperate;
your hair stands on end and the perspira
tion oozes out ot every pore as the ago
nizing thought comes over you, what if
the luckless child should have a fit!
You try baby talk ; but " littv, litty
lamby" has no effect for it stretches as
if a red-hot poker had been laid upon
its spine, and still it yells. You are
afraid the neighbors will be alarmed,'
and give it your gold watch as a lost re
source, just m time to savo your whis
kers ; though it throws down a handful
of your cherished mu-.taches to take ihj
watch, and you thankfully find an eaiy
chair to rest your aching limbs, when down
c unes that costly watch upon the floor,
and the cause of all the trouble break
into an ear-splitting roar, and you set
your teeth and prepare to administer
personal chastisement, when in rushes'
the happy woman known as your wife'
snitches up the long-sulferiug child
from your willing arms, snd, sitting
down, stills it by magic, while you gaz
mournfully at the remains of your wat-h
and cherished mustache;' and, ntterinsr
a malediction on babykind in general,
and on the image of its father iu partic
ular, vow never to take care of the baby
again until the next time.
Brought Him in Alive .
A defeated man. is fortunate if bo
happens to be a witty one too. He can .
save his credit by his explanation! An
exchange tells how a lucky phrase of '
army language brought a certain "hero"
out of a doubtful hunting experience ,
with success:
A party of soldiers " out West, not
having much to do, resolved to go bear
hunting. They had been out abont six- '
tf en horns and had not seen a bear, and,
;ing tired. and hungry, returned to
amp. On their arrival at headquarter
'hey missed one of their companions,
but thought nothing of it, one of them
remarking :
" He wdl return all right"
They made their camp-tire and com-"
menced preparations for supper. They
had some coffee over the tire ; one of
them was slicing some potatoes, another
was stewing some meat, and the re
mainder sat around the firo waiting,
when they were all startled by a terrible
noise that seemed to e- me nearer thi
camp. Suddenly the thickets parted,
and in rushed the missing man, his hair
standing on end, his face deadly whit-,
his gun gone, and his arms dying in'
the air, as if grasping for imaginary ob
jects, and about two feet leliind him
came a great black bear. Tha pursued'
soldier turned when he saw the bear
drop, and, looking at one of them, Bald,
breathlessly :
"Is he dead?"
One of the men asked :' . ,
" Why didn't you shoot Mm, ihste.-vd'
of running?"
" What do you take me for t" r plif d
the missing one, " Do you think i w.m
such a fool SB to shoot him, when I
could bring him in alive?''
XN Oaiuornia wages are high, food
cheap, the climate is glorious, and it'a
the cheapest country in the world in
which to shoot anybody. Thundtr
stonns and mcteorio showers are not so
rare as convictions for murder.
A New Hampshire womaa has pre.
served a part of her wedding cake for
forty-nine years,-
Opforttjnities are very sensitive
things ; if you slight them on their tir .t
visit, you seldom see th-m again.-
t , . . ............

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