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FLORENCE, PINAL COUNTY, ARIZONA TERRITORY, SATURDAY, MARCH 18, 1882. NUMBER-3T WfUMIII IM II PROFESSIONAL. MKVr O. HOWARO. MAKCUS P. HAYNE, HOWARD & HAYNE, ATTOBXTTS AND COUXSKLOR9 AT tAW, GORNFR Sixth and Fremont streets, TondiHtoue, A. T. A. H. PARKER, MlXlNd ENfllNEER AND V. S. DEriTY MINERAL Surveyor. Ollice in San Francisco Jewelry Store, No. 4iW Allen street, south niilu, lietweeu Fourth Anil Fifth trc , ToTiihtune, A. T. JOHN M. MILLER. J. U. LUCAS. LUCAS & MILLER, Attorneys and Tnixsrt.oris at law, office, room 5 ami 7 (lint building, comer of Fremont n.l Fourth, Tomlwtime, A. T. LEW H. DAVH. UKO. R. Wll.U.UIS. WILLIAMS & DAVIS, Attorneys at law. uuid' kew building, oonir uH'uunb. tuid Freunmt at. , Tombxtoik-, A. T. - WELLS SPICER, Attorntt and cory.tEi.oR at law, 2H nrm utreet, 'i.niltone, Cmhi Co., A. T. Also Notivry J'nlilic; V. K. l'omi'ioiier o 1x-Jh for inlifornift. J. G. PASXE, ClVlI. SNIINrKR AND V. 3. MINFRAI HI I;VFV0!1 fWrveyiiitf done in &11 itn branches. Othue, 5L'ii Fremont ttrvt, Tomtwtono. Arizona. 0. T. HENDERSON, I'HTMCIAX AND sVRUKOtl. OFTIcr, BO HlS mout rni, Ti'Dilwtone, Arizona. A. 0. WALLACE, JtsTicu or the fsace. kot-rth ftiieet, tlm door below Fremont, Tombstone, A. T. JOHN M. MURPHY Attorney at law, room 2S, brown's hotel Twmbttoue, Ariwmft. L. F. BLACKBURN, rKPVTT SHFRIF?' AND AND fOMTCTWR. OFFICE with A. T. Jonen, office Huivclma Lumber Vo., Fourth street, belnw Fremont. All ofticial bu.sine.Mi promptly attended to. Collections a nrwoia.lt y. J. F. HUTTON, ATTORNBY AT LAW. OKFICB OX FIFTH STRICT, between Freinout and Allen, Tombstone, Ari- XOfVi. G. E. GOODFELLOW, XI. D. Orrfoe in vickf.hu' siilbiuo, tremont travt, ToiuUrtow, A. T. P. T. COLBY, Attorney at law.- will practice in ail the ewtirtu of the Territory. Uliioe in tiinl's building, roomn 11 and 12, corner of Fourth and Fremont strnet. Tomietone, A. T. Oubrd Haymonk, A. M. Walker, Sacramento City. Toiutmtoue. WALKER & HAYMOND, ATTOUNnS AT LAW. PROMPT ATTEXTION IV- ea to all business intrusted to them. Collec tions made a specialty. A. M. Wnlker Com Biixaiouer of d-uds for the State of Xevmhi. A. J. FELTER, JUKTtCB OF THE MACK, NOTARY ri'IlLIC AND Meal Estate Atfent. llttioe on Fremont xtrect, between Fourth and Filth, Toiubntone, A. T. ER. R. H. MATTHEWS, TnYHICIAN AND Rl'lt'lKOX, TOMRSTONF, ARIRZO- na. Oific with W. Street, Fourth street, near Allen. a. 0'MELVKNET. O. O. TUANTLM. O'MELVENY & TRANTUNI, ATTORSKYR AT LAW. ROOMS 3 AND 4 OIIlI"s buildinK, corner Fourth and F'reniout streets, TaTidwtone, A. T. . S. M. ASHENFELTER, Attorney at law, cliftok, a. t. frompt atWution given to any business entrusted to inr enre. MILTON B. CLAPP, NOTARY PUBLIC, CO XVEYAXCEK y- " AND FIR INHI'RANCE aof.nts. OfHe at Stafford, Hudson & Co.'s Bank, Tombstone, A. T. Thomas Wallace. Mining rrokf.r, real estate acfnt and C'n ey anoer. Allen street, 1 oinl'xtone. Rodman M. Price, Jr., Civil enoinefr and v. b. depvty mineral turreyor. Ottio V'oisard building;, Allen street, Tomlietone, A. 1 . . J as. G. Hiward, (Lata of I 01 Angeles.) Attorney at law. at rukxsT at the or ftc of J. W. Sttiinp. Toni!etone, A. T. W. A. Harwood, NTART P'I.1C, CORNER FOI'RTH AND FRK mont streets, Tomlstone, A. T. T. J. Drum, , Attorney at law. office in vickers building, 431 Fremont street, Tombstone, A. T. E. P. Voieard, AUSAYER AND NOTARY PVDI.IC, ALLEN HTRFET, TombKtone, A. 1. Cliai-lea AcLlejr, Civil enoineer and pity v. s. minfral Surveyor, ToiWlone, A. 1. Othee on Fre- mont street, lietwoen nixtn ano Seventh. J. V. Vickcra, Real em-ate arent. aictionffr, convey aniwr and Mining Operator. F'remout street. near rsfth, lomljetoiie, A. 1. A. G. IiOwery, Attoiinet at law, eremont utrf.et, between Fourth and Fifth, Tombstone, A. '1'. Will praottue in all courts. Aent for mining proi: e-ty. Coti-Teyancintf and collecting promptly tt"line,l to. Ketf reni-e given. r. M. SMITH. W. EARL. G. W. aPAl LDINU, Earl, Smith & Spaulding, ATTORNKYH AND COI'NSEf.ORS AT LAW. OFFICE In Drake'shlock on Feumugtou street, Tucson, A mona 1 erntory John Roman, Attorney at law, tcchon, Arizona. Webb Street, Attorney at law, 113 fourth street, tom stone, Arizona. J. W. Stump, Attorney and cohnhelor at law, rooms and 4, Kpitniih I'liil'lini', Fremont street Teuibstone, A. T. Will iiractice in all the courts of the Territory, and attend to business j.tore the IJepartment at Yv ashuigton, J . t KMcial attention given to U, S. patent ain p'nlon IiUMiness. Dr. GilLingham, Pn. flll.I.FNOHAM (LATE OF VIROINIA CITY) IS now associated, in the. practice fif Medicine and puiiverv, with lr. Iiildcrsleeve. Othce Kpitaph Imildinst, ronitmtone, A. T. Dr. F. HeUer, Srlir.EONAND PHYSICIAN. OFFICE ON FIFT tree, below Allen, Tombstone, A. T. -OF- -OF- - AT FLORENCE, GOODS WILL COIE? for A LARGE ASSORTMENT OF enera ercnansj Goods, GROCERIES, Ciothinp- and Gent's Furnishina- Goods, HARDWARE, Falk's Milwaukee Beer, -AL80- Wagons, Teams and Other Prop erty. H, B. MONTGOMERY, Assinries. FANCY STORE AI Ml I T SILVER KlisG, A.. T. R. 0 UNGr,. KEETS CONSTANTLY ON IIANI) A f'HOir'E ASSORTMENT OF FANCY GOODS t'Oill'KISIXU Zepliyrs, Silk Floss, Card Boards, Mottoes, Beads, Silk Ties, Scarfs, 'Euclies, Lace Ties, HandkercMefs, etc, Also Books, Stationery, Periodicals, Pipes, TOBACCOS, CIGARS. - ARIZONA. BE SOLD AT "(O-dE - n If I werr. a railroad brakeman, I'd boiler the stationft no plaiu That the man who was going to Teaa Would ro clear through to Maine. I'd oren the door vt the HmokiiiR-car, And I'd give anch a mighty roar That ihe itafpengers back in the eleeer Would all fall rut on the floor; For I couldn't nffmil a tenor voice. And I couldn't afford to upeuk In tlx - Bweet, soft toLca of .liolian bar!) For ecvt n doIJara a week. Jf I wero a bsgtras mapfcr, I'd rattle the trunks about: I'd pt:ml them up in the corner And I'd tear their biweia out. I would i'uU the handles out by the roots, I would kick the comerH in, And strew their Httillin ail round the or. And niyke them i:mk aiid tJiin; Fnr I couldn't tfl'ord to wear kid gloves. Nor pi.t Pift pad"1 on my feet, lS'or t- h;mdle tlii; trs gently, when nil my pay Jucl kcit me in bread and rtuat. If I wore a railroad conductor, At through tt? trcn I'd ?o, I'd have 1'iT rvtry quc.ti' n tin y aslrcd Tbi nns'wor si! r-'fidv " Dt n't ki:ov." I'd misf cr-iiiit'cti.siip tor lots oi iul'h, I'd run Io!:cp;:-v,. iiK'rtf p;i.-t. I'd tiTi tie m 7t-M fi -h ihvu I kric-v "twas teu Ami I'd ;vcHr tii:V WtttL'h:.'M t;e i:tft, For 1 couMu't vi'- id to b,; civil, Mii! 1 krit'v evt'ry man in Uh1 'ond Wmiid look at my wat h ainl rintr, and ny, 11c rt.ile tlif-ni things fiom iht: ro..-.L"' ' Diirlii.rjtvn Ihwk-Ki e. In till? private oJJioe of : IiO'.nl'in v.iev- clmnt, n younj? num, Vi-rnnS upon his 21et year, 8tood before his fuijjloyer in tue ciiaifietcr oi a culprit. lim nice or the rnercliiiut betokened the possession of a clifir;u tcr in which whiit tiie wo: 11 calls dogged reselution was the prevail ing element. " I tll yon again," said lie, " I can not will not overlook yonr otiensa." " elieve me, sir, appealed tin; youth, " I had no criminal intention : the fault was entirely unpremeditated it was an act of folly, which I tshidl never oh, sir, never repeat." One of those cold ami horrible smiles which so forcibly express incredulity swept across the merchant's face, and he waved his baud as if ho wished the in terview to be terminated. The voung man, whose eountennnce tip to this moment h'vd been burning with shame, now became deadly pale"; he saw his employer's determination was not to be shaken, and that disprrace stared him hideously in the face. Ho made a vain ellort at another appeal, but the words died on his lip and a.feeling of despair utterly extinguished the faint hopes he had entertained of being nier cilully dealt with. " My poor mother ! gasped he, hid ing his face ia his hands and sobbing bitterly. The merchant's hard features slightly relaxed perhaps he loved bis mother dearly; but the fe.-ling, whatever it might have been, was only a transient one. " Waller Jackson," said he, in hard. ringing tones, which instantly roused the young man from his grief " I tell you once again, my inind is made .up, ana the sooner you leave my omc:i tlie better. 1 never prosecute in small cases like yours. Begone, and never let ma see or hear from you again." rue. delinquent, awed by that iron will, meehaniciillv turned upon his lit el and left the office. Stunned and bewil dered by the catastrophe which had, in one moment, crushed all his young nearts iiops, no moved along the streets like a man drunk, or bending beneath a burden which exposed him to the mercy of the passer-by. Pressed and weighed down by a heavy fear, he went from that noisome place to ramble like a fallen spirit until the hour at which ho usually returned from his la bors to the home where he was welcomed by a mother's smile and fond attentions. Hardening himself to play a deceptive p u t in hi r pre.eence, he approached the door with a confidence which his con science too surely told him was but au dacious assurance. And when he took his aecus'omed seat at the tea-table and responded to her gentle inquiries, he did so outwardly unabashed ; but with in, tar trom human eye, he felt the glow of shame's blush and the torture which the contrast between vice and virtue renders more acute. His unsuspecting parent noticed no change in him during the whole of that trying evening, and when lie retired to his chamber he received her blessing with a stoicism which almost amounted to cold indifference. But, when he had only himself to deal with, the actor for got his part, and once more became the conscience-stricken man of guilt. Despair, with its harrowing convictions, prostrated the whele of his faculties, and he moaned in the helplessness of his coikl.tion. He threw hnnself un dressed on the bed, and yielded to the horrors by which he saw himseif on all sides surrounded. He moaned ajid he cried, and then he clenched his lists and beat the air exe crated himself, then others and finally sprang from the bed like a savage darting upon his prey. His eyes sparkled.bis chest heaved, and" his whole attitude was that of menace and defiance. " Since I cannot go back," thought he, setting his teeth firmly together, "I will go forward ; and wo be it to " At this critical moment his glance fell on a picture hanging against the wall ; it was the head of our Savior, and the gift of his mother. A long, long look did he take at the mild face which smiled so sweetly from its canvas, and then he burst into tears. They were the best he had ever shed, for they opened up to liim the fountains of a new life, and ex tinguished those unholy sparks which despair had kindled in his bosom. After his powerful emotion had in some degree subsided, he knelt down by the bedside, and prayed as only those can who need divine assistance. He rose calm and re freshed, and seated himself at a little table to deliberate on the course he should pursue. Many and various were his thoughts, but they all partook of the tone of one grand, all-commanding senti ment ; and by that he w as resolved to be guided. The coinage ot his brain was distilled in that best of all alembics. the heart ; and gradually there was ac cumulated within him a gently-flowing river of thought, beside which Hope stood waving her green branch, and bidding him in honeyed accents, "Never lies pair. In the morning he rose, after a dream less night, vigorous and determined. nn 1 hastened to carry out one of the most dirlieult of the tlireo resolutions he had formed ; that was to part, perhaps for ever, with the girl he loved. "Alary," said he, gazing mournfully into her tearful face, "I love you as well, indeed bitter, at this moment than ever I did but we must part. Circum stances have occurred which render this painful step necessary." "Cannot you explain, Walter ?" de manded she, clinging to him. " Dear Mary, don't ask me I cannot," replied he, painfidly. "I cannot, in deed only to my Goal Listen, con tinued he solemnly; "to-morrow I shall bo far away from von; and the probabil ity is that it would be a very long time at present, 1" think, many years before we should meet again; so that continuing our engagement is a mere mockery, be cause the chances are that I shall be un able to keep it." "Oh!" exclaimed the girl, wounded to the quick by a sentiment she misunder stood. "Do not mistake me," said ho, taking her by the hand, and struggling to sub due his own strong emotion ; "I love you dearly, and that is the reason I do not wish you to remain bound to what may never be fulfilled on my part. You, I know, would be faithful and true; but why should you waste the iloom of your youth, and neglect the many opportuni ties you will have of making yourself happy, for the sake of a man you may never see agaiu ? No, Mary; you shall not do so ; from this moment you are free, and may heaven bless you i" The girl hung down her head and cried bitterly, for she felt that her young hopes were about to bewitiiered. Walt' r, animated by the new feelincrs hud acquired, was invincible ; h duty required the sacrifice, and it should he made. L i.donbieiliy it was one of the greatest he could have made, for he might have played upon the girl's credu- lfy, and niamtamed h:s position as lover without the remotest prospect or inten tion oi' bec.'miiig her husband. But with the resolution to do right comes a 'onaiueruuou lor omers, winch weakens lie natural se!ii,shne.-s of the heart, and gives it t!ie power to make those stern sacrifices which honor to frequently de mands. ' Now, for mr mother," thought he. and trembled at the interview before him ; for, had ihe alternative been ure- senti d to him, he would have preferred that tae ma den ha had parted with hould have been acquainted with his error, turn that his mother, his lrre- proaehp.ole nioiner, should have known that he had brorght shame on the name of the parent who had been so honored and respected when alive. Alter a protracted conversation with his mother, she yielded to his entreaties, nd consented to retire to a more humble 1 welling. The removal was speedily eftucfod, and, on the eveuing of the day on which they took possession of the two apartments wh eh were thenceforth to be their home, the motiier bew ildered by the change, inmiired from her son why he had gone so far from the office. " l have lett Mr. 's employ he was diasausueil witn me, replied Wal ler, slightly blushing at the equivoca tion. ' Dissatisfied with vou ! " exclaimed the mother. " Oh, Walter, there is something in all this 1 don't understand; first, you bid Mary farewell, then you inciuce me to leave tjiouaesly street, ind now you tell me you have lett your iflice. Walter, my dear son, do not conceal anything from m?." Walter's lips quivered and his eve avoided his mother's steady gaze, but making a great efiort lie soon recovered himself, and seeing that he must be cool and lirni, or all would be explained, and perhaps so shock his mother as to do her serious injury, he addressed himseli to her in the calm language of reason. He explained that he had been dis charged by Mr. owing to his being extremely dissatisfied with him, and that, as he never intended to return to mat line of business again, it was necessary, until he had established himself in some other, that his mother, deprived of the assistance of his salary, should be placed m such a position as would enable her to live imon the slender annuity she enioved. " My son," said the mother, aCected at this instance of filial devolion, " but why separate from Mary ? " " Because, replied alter, I wooed her under favorable circumstances, be came gracious in her eves by the aid of those circumstances, and, now that they have disappeared, my duty to her and myself demantls that 1 should withdraw from her society. Our p-sition toward each other has undergone a change ; she isin the same condition, while 1 am poor, very poor ; and love and poverty rarelv agree." " You know little yet of a woman's heart, Walter," said his mother, smil ing, "or you would lie aware that, pro vided a man re tains his honor, she C:ires little in her youth about the trash which the world calls wealth." This remark caused Walter to turn pale as death, and iibnest to fail from his seat fainling. His alarmed mother iiew to his assistance, and beseeclied uim to make a confidant of her ; for she was sure, she said, he had something concealed from her which caused liim the most poignant distress. With the utmost difficulty lie reas sured her, and, when both were more calm, he solemnly requested her to grant him a favor. " What is it ? " she inquired. " Trust me," replied he, falling on his knees before her. " I will ! " she emphatically px claimed, failing on his neck ; and from ihat day forth the subject was never renewed between them. " Tvo resolutions triumphantly car ri d out," said Walter, after his mother had retired ; " and to morrow is the na tivity cf the third." Taking a large slieet of paper, he wrote upon it,' in a very large, round hand, tiie lahsmamc words, " .Never de spair ! " and then fastened it to the cur tains at the foot of his bed, so that ho light have the sentence before him to read night and morning. It was a mighty task, and no blood stained knight . ever couched lance against a foe more gallantly than did our bravo Walter, in this, his first great moral battle. The struggle with life was an arduous and protracted oue ; but, as it is not our intention to follow Walter in all his wanderings, we can only relate that ha found no employment too mean for his industry, and n occunation disgraceful, uu! ess criminal and dishonorable. At the end of six years, by dint of the most indefatigable labor and hard, common day -Jalor alone he had accumulated from Iiis labor sufficient to pay his first employer tue amount of his defalcation. together with interest up to the day of payment. Noon had jut been proclaimed by the great bell of St. Paul's when Walter presented himself at the oifice of the merchant. Witn some difficulty he ob tained a private interview. " Well, my man!" said the merchant, m no very aimaole manner, for Walter: apparel was not verv attractive. " Six years ago, this very day." said Walter, modestly, but firmly, "you dis missed from year service a clerk named Walter Jackson fur a defalcation in the account intrusted to him. I am Walter Jacikson, and here is the apiount owing to you, wall interest at 5 per cent. nave been unable to pay you sooner, or l should, most gladly have done so, -Vow, to my great relief, I am able, and 'ieg in aae-tiou that you will accept my nost grateful thanks ior tiie loruearance "on uxcrci ;e.l toward iue on that uis- Surprise for a time held the mercnaiii, mute, but w hen he recovered he stretched lorth his hand to the workman, and, when he received that of the latter, shook it warmly. He then requested Waiter to relate what Had helallen nun since their separation. Walter did so ia a brief but clear and unreserved manner. ' So the moment you left this office you determined to make restitution ?" baid the merchant, smiling, evidently highly gratified with the narrative. "Oh, no, replied Walter; "1 was tempted to do worse first." ' Indeed ! How ? mquired the mer chant-. whos curiosity was roused. 'By thinking I could never redeem nly lost character," answered Waltor. " What saved you? asked the mer chant, eagerly. " Two words, said Walter, a glow animating his naturally fine countenance; JN ever despair. The merchant saw a kindred spirit be fore him, and detained Walter, in con versation for some- time. In the course of many revelations which were obtained froai lifm, he stated that lie had found tune to acqim-e knowledge as well as to labor, and that some of the sweetest hours he had spent were those devoted to study. They parted, out trom that day forth a friendship was established between Walter and the great city merchant, and when the latter died he left him a legacy of 1,000. How a Man Balanced Europe. A good many yeara ago George Sand gave a grand dinner to the notabilities of the Jicvu'e de Deux Mondes, the principal attractions ot the party being a distinguished Euglish diplomatist and 31. 1'., passing through i'anson his way to Vienna on a secret mission to Austria, and the pott Alfred de Musset. When the hour and the guests arrived, the diplomatist was found at his post: naug.ity and reserved, not to say stirl, hut Ue Musset, to every one s disap pointment, was absent. The guests. however, seated themselves, and, out of compliment to their distinguished vis itor, the conversation turned upon poli ties, the great gun of the lievue being intent on drawing out the British diplo matist, who, however, maintained an in sular silence, broken only by occasional monosyllables, spoken with icy polite ness. When, however, th9 subject of the balance of Euro- e was breached, the great statesman's eye kindled, nd, with a majestic gesture, he cleared his throat and said: "The balance of Europe this is my idea as to the manner in which it should be maintained !" and seizing his plate with both hands he linng it up to the ceiling, imparling to it a rapid rotary motion, and as it fell receiving it w ith imperturbable gravity on the point of his kmie, where it went on spinning. The stupelaction was general, nor was it lessened by the action of one of the tablemaids, w ho, with much presence of mind, seized the water-pitcher and poured its contents Over the bald head of the British statesman, who, however, uever diverted his attention from the whirling plate. Ihe diplomatist was Delurran, tne ma gician, and the servant gill proved- to be De Musset, who had sacrificed his mustache on the altar of a practical joke. Tlie Diffusion of Seeds. In a very largo number of cases the diffusion of seeds is effected by animals. To this class belong the fruits and ber ries. In them an outer fleshy portion becomes pulpy and generally sweet, in closing the seeds. It is remarkable that such fruits, in order, doubtless, to at tract animals, are, like flowers, brightly colored as, for instance, the cherry, currant, apple, pcacu, plum, strawber ry, raspberry and many others. This color, moreover, is not present in the unripe fruit, but is rapidly developed at maturity. In such cases the actual seed is generally protected by a dense, some times alms it stony, covering, so that it escapes digestion, while its germination is perhaps hastened by the heat of the animal's body. It may be said that the skin of apple and pear pips is compara tively soft; but then they are imbedded in a stringy core, which is seldom eaten. These colored fruits form a considerable part of the food of monkeys in the trop icid regions of the earth, and we can, I think, hardly doubt that these animals are guided by the color, just as we are, in selecting the ripe fruit. In these in stances of colored fruits the fleshy, edi ble part more or less surrounds the true seeds; in others the actual seeds them selves become edible. In the former the edible part serves as a temptation to animals; in the latter it is stored up for the use of the plant itself. When, there fore, tbe seeds themselves are edible they are generally protected by more or less hard or bitter envelopes for instance, the horse chestnut, beech, Spanish chestnut, walnut, etc. That these seeds are used for food by squirrels and other animals is, however, by no means neces sarily an evil to the plant, for the result is that tlrey are often carried some dis tance and then dropped, or stored up and forgotten, so that in this way they get carried away roin the parent tree. Sir John Lubbock, in Fortnightly Re view. IIov to Predict the Weather. An intensely blue sk indicates a tem porary absence of clouds. Under other ireumstanees again, an intensely blew sky indicates a tornado. When the -uu rises behind a bank of clouds, and they hang low all over the horizon, and the air feels damp and there is a fine, drizzling mist blowing, the indications re there will be a rain somewhere in the United States or Canada. When it egins to thunder look out for light ning. To see tiie head of the family eelmg in his right-hand pocket, then in the left-hand pocket, then ia all his rest-pockets,' then in his hip-pockets, then in his coat-pockets, and then at his ceiling, iiidieatc-; "no change." If he suddenly s(ops whistling at the ceiling and expands his face into a broad gii mace of delight, it means "unexpected change." if the corn husks are very thick, the winter will be colder than the summer. If the corn husks are very thin, the summer will be warmer than the winter. If the corn husks are neither too thin nor too thick, the summer will be warm and the winter v.iil be cold. II the weaher prophet predicts a rainy season and it happens to rain away out in Calaveras county, atid is dry as bone all over the rest of America, this rain must be set down to the credit of the weather-breeder, and all the dry time counts for nothing. The Lebanon Shakers number 350, two-tliirds of whom are women and girls, and their property is valued at S1.500,- U00, Members relinquish all claims on retiring from tne community. run ad toixt. The man who leads a dog's life prob ably barks for a clothing house. Something that will keep, but not desirable to have on hand a wart. A professional beauty, though two words, is really only one silly belle. When a bald-headed man buys n duster, mohair would be most appro priated A Connecticut woman was appointed constable, and the lii-ot thing she said was: " JNow 1 shall cstcli a man. Woi't.d'st hear the pan that Hero made. Embracing on the Band hnv Wet lover ? " Sweet Tu-lips P he Eaid ; And she cried : O Leander 1' A Hartfobd divorce lawyer faid to his minister ; "You and I live in the right State for one another wiat you Connecticut !" We kaow-a, cat that was dn the creek. NextJay t he cat appeared at the back window, with the creek in its back. Whitehall Time. Jones, getting up from his dinner in a quiet way, remarked to his landlady that he had found everything on the table cold except the ice-cream. Sam Keap.net, of Illinois, killed his wife because he couldn't make her sit down in a chair. He didn't begin rieht. If he had told her to stand up sh j would have sat down. "I wouldn't care to be the prettiest girl alive," simpered a swain as he sat i;i a drawing-room. "Indeed! Why not?'' was the response. "Because," baid he, " I'd rather be next to her." " Tojcit, did vou hear your mother call you?"' "'Corse I did." "Then why don t you go to her at once ? " Well, yer see she's nervous, and it'd shock her awful 'fi should go too sud dent," Some one his formed 1.051 Enelish words of not less than four Jotters in the word 'Tegu'atioiis."' This may be a pleasant kind of work, but it is not so profitable as killing potato-bugs one at a Lime. A mettle boy was asked if ho knew where the w icked finally went to. He ansTcred i " They practice law here a spell and then go to the Legislature." It was a painful operation for that boy to sit aown ior a lew days. "Halloa!" Y,Tith this exclamation the hunter came to an abrupt halt. (The concluding chapters of the thrill ing and absorbingly interesting st ry of "The Scout and 'the Indian" will bo found in our waste-basket.) HASH. Vbrn all the Tt orld ii? roun, lad, And all the trees aid green, And every gooee a swan, lad, Aud every Jaws a queen. Then hey ior loot and Lore, ltd. And round t:ie worid away. Young llocd nnif-i have its eourfip, Ud, And every dog Irs day. Nevep. marry for wealth, but remem ber that it is just a3 easy to love a girl r no nas a nncK uouse witn a mansard roof and a silver-plated door-bell as one who hasn't anything but an auburn head and an amiable disposition. While walizing 'round the ball-room gay-, Made bright with lights aim mirrors hiie, She turned her face from his away. . Pray, what's the runt'er, dariiiii? mine? H".s what I said given thee offense t Kas aught I;ve done estranged thy heart ? Turn not from me your sweet faee heue I eannot, cannot f-c.m Uic e part ! ' liow foolish, Fred ! you know Tm fnnd; And as we nass you pter-giass bright, I oniy look from you beyond To see if ruy ne dress hangs right." Last summer she was eating green corn by gnawing it from the cob, when her teeth became entangled with corn silk. " Oh, dear," she said, impatiently, "I wish when they get the corn made they would pull out the basting threads 1" A Burlington shoemaker," according to the Haivk-Eye, got tired of his trade and began to practice medicine. The only startling feature in the new doc tors practice is his habit of plunging a crooked awl into the patient's foot a couple of inches, to see if he is soP-nd. " Wheee are yon going ?"' said a young gentleman to an elderly one in a white cravat whom he overtook a few miles from Little Bock. "Iam going to heaven, my son. I have been on my way for eighteen years." " Well,- good by, old fellow ! If you have been trav eling toward heaven for eighteen years, and got no nearer than Arkansas, will take another route." A funny story comes from the jeaside, in connection with the decease of a well known hotel-keeper, who was . more famous for Ids good heart aud pride in the healthfulness cf his hotel than for his adaptability to modern ideas. After his death, a woman, who had often visit ed the hotel, made a call of condolence upon the widow, who received her cor dially, and was much pleased to talk of her husband's good qualities, her own loss, etc., but suddenly, wiping her eyes, she eiclainied : " But it is a great com fort to me, Mrs. C, that poor died in such a healthy place." The Times for 1980. The Printtr-Advertiser says : "En glishmen are not famous for great jokes, but one has recently been perpetrated in Loudon which is really atboiirable, and the result of a vast amount of hard work. It consists of the issue of a copy of the London Times for 1980, of the full size of the ' Thunderer,' and closely resembling it in every feature, even down to the obscurest advertisements. Tlie editorials, language and style are closely copied, and, in dealing with, matters 100 years to come, presents some fine satiri cal hits at things of the present day. "The House of Lords becomes the 'House of Ladies,' and generally the other sex seems to have got the upper hands ot the world. The center of lash ion is transferred to Feejee, and the fashion notes from the island capital are decidedly funny. " The progress of invention is shown by the news of a battle in the Arctic re gions, and tlie capture of the North pole, transmitted 'in thoughtonomic dissyllables byour special phonographic artist.' Traveling is done mostly through the air, and penny excursk ns are offered to all parts of the world. " The advertisements are among the best features of the joke, and include such announcements as Greek Taught at One Session,' 'Headache Cured in One Minute,' ' The Patent Masticators,' ' Elephant's Milk,' Burning Glasses for Making Hay,' 'Traps for Fleas, 'Postal Balls ' (for sending messages by can non), notices of ' Exclusions from Lon don to Jericho,' 'Seven Hours with the Esquimaux,' ' Lunar Expeditions,' 'Bal loons for the Epsom Races,' and a mul titude of other novelties." The man who takes ms place In this world, w hether to preach in a tabernacle, sing in a coloseum, or build the waste places, having a clear view of his work, a settled conviction of duty who be lieves what he asks others to believe, and lives what he teaches will find an I open d-jor to success. Iceland's rompeii. -; From the geyser there is a plain view, of Hecla, that awful volcano that has so often threatened the very existence of the people of this unfortunate island. It is interesting only on account of its his-, tory, and looks so much like other mountains that, unless you were a geol ogist, 'you, could not tell it from hun -drells of others. Being 5,364 feet high, it has particular charms ior Englishmen, .who seem to be born with a hereditary propeKisity to ciimb, but as most of the ponies that have attempted to climb it came down with a rush over its treach erous pnmice-iined sides, no-sane Amer ican has yet been up to its top. Alwiut the time tiiry c-elsjbiate the next millen nial here, when they put up a Jacob's ladder, as they have it at Mount Wash ington, and introduce a railroad, wiyK ' . ; eaieium-ligiit efi'ects, as the hawT at " Vesuvius, AmerioniwJJiaje-Bo' doubt, . viiT&Btii1ueiit at the summit. i'heir repiet-entative is there no, for it " is a fay. -.rite . screeching place of the ' eagle. Tne reputation of Hecla is like many others more than her da a, She is heard -of in eli lands, yet Skif-ta Jo- ,: kul lias done twice as much in a voicanio ay, and litlle is known about her. lu my remuiiscer.e s I was almost for getting about Skapta Jokul. Skapbi may be said io oceupv the sonthwestera portion of Iceland. She is no ordinary." , ..ill, for she has pre empted a space bigger than ithodo Inland for herself. It isn't that she Li so big aj that she re quires so much room for what she don't want. Skupt i'o greatest eii'ort was per formed in 17S3, seventeen years alter Hecla had done the best she knew how. The reading of the account of Skapta's wotk will invigorate the imagination, ior she gets away with anything the p.niiy-dreadlul author ever thought of. . About the beginning of June, of the year -named, the usual preliminary noise be-. g;.n in the neigbb j hojd of ihe mount ains, and on tbe tsth i f the month a rcat volume of smoke aid ashes spread over the whole district of Sida, going in the direction against the wind. On the 10th the river Skaptu, overflowed w,th fetid water find thin suddenly disap-. peared. i ire broke cut on me mount ain, and two days later a stream of lav eame ooz:i!g out of the ury bed of the river. Jtiotwitkitaading that the channel -was GOO feet dtep : nd 200 wide, the lava oveifiowed the banks and inundated the Meddelhtnd country, lifting the grass a it went as water would tloat a film of oil.. The stream finally floated into the Med-, deiland lake, tided it up, and then di vided into two streams, one of them, igain seeking the course of the vivtr tud finally leaping, maddened and hoi,' into the ce i, over the great cataract of jtapafoss, whose brink is oUU feet above .Uu sta level. The other stream, after traversing a wide section of lowland, country, found a line cf least resistance in the llveitisiiiot river bed. This Lftt ; stream of lava, ti3 far as it has been sur- vev'etl theie is much of it, how much no one knows, in a country over which nomau has ever been is forty miles in length and seven in width. That which .veiit over the cataract, is fifty miles h-ng ind iifureu broad. The lava ceased to. dow in Augutt, and the convnls. n end-,-d with a g-atid eaitliq nake. For. a .vhola year it continued to rain cinders aud dust i-ud thousands of acres of grass land were Lrui. dand withered under thu hot showers. It is estimated that 190,- OUi) Siieep, 23,000 horses, 11,000 cattle. aud y,0UU men died as a result of the eruption. Siiiee .then there has been, nothing worth mentioning in the volcano; line. J.ct:i r from Ic.lan Tic Pclso, Within the limits of health there may be considerable variation in tiie fre quency of the pulse, the number cf . pulses per minute diiTering with age,, sex, stature, muscular action, mental ac tion, the state of tne digestive process, and the iiine of day. . Tiie average fee-, qilency per minute is appro simai-ely in dicated by the following table given by Carpenter : . PU e in 'he r.e rIy-lorn infant Wl to 1-M P.ll-e durifg l.-.:tyear lio to Kid .'nlse drains' oi ye a: W0 to 115 t'n.e e.nrn, Md year to lav PuVe durii.g Tth't i i-tt:t yt-ar so to iM pnite '.inrii g H h to 'jist er 7-1 to S3 l'n&c d'uing iii.-lt to OJtii year 70 to 7.i in oid age 75 to HO ' In inflammatory or acute diseases tlie. pulse may rise to 120 or even 150 in.tha . adult, anil become, so frequent. In. -the child that it can not be counted. ' Muscu lar exertion, mental-excitement, diges tion, aleohoiis driukand elevation above the sea level accelerate the pulse, aud as a general rule it is more frequent in , the morninsfthan iu the evening. It is slower insleeo and from the effect of 2"v" rest, diet, cold or blood-letting. The.,.. pulse of a grown woman exceeds that ot,., :,v a man of the same age as much as 10 to : 14 beats a minute, and according to some authorities is less frequent in the . ii,- tall than in the short person, the varia- VC, tion being about i beats for each six inches of heiq-ht. . v ' A Witch. . ' The great man is he who rises sn perior to the prejudices of his age ; but . before the end of the seventeenth cent ury with the exception of Bo din, Erastus, Reginald Scot, John Wagstaffe and Dr. Webster there were none who had the - bold-, ntssorthe knowledge to brand witch craft as a base and palpable superstition. . We lind Lord Bacon gravely prescribing "henbane, hemlock, mandrake, moon-, shade, tobacco, opium and other sopo viferous medicines " as the best ingredi enls for a witch's ointment. From the pages of his " History of the World." . we see that, the gifted and practical Sir. Walter Raleigh was a firm believer in this childish form of superstition. The learned Selden, in his "Table Talk," while pleasantly discoursing on the sub ject of witches, shows that he also beefe-a,"" the same faith. Sir Thomas Bronife V?--' tlie kindliest of physicians ; Sir - V thew Hale, one of the nos'.: spotless of Judges; Kobbrx " the eminent l5r. More, Oi and the patient and then, all were of opinion that- -,'t-ittiu.irri an evil capable of solid proof, and tlrt its disciples merited sharp and swjt punishment. . It was not nnta the daif of the eighteenth century that mifi came to the conenlusion that the devic of "witches and witch-mongers ". wey , only so many tricks and fables, and ut terly unworthy of credence. The kd indicia! execution in England for v.iteft craft took place in tlie year 171 o. wheel i woman and her little daughter we":f hanged at Huntingdon " for selliu;; their souls to Satan." Since that dtc however, various cases have occurred ot w omen accused as witches being drowned while undergoing the ordeal by wat r at the hands of their intimidated yet infuriated neighbors. J'rascr's Ara;a- The average life of a lawyor is abou five years in Ohio then they refoim and remove to seme other State, "' ssiua oc.-a.io.i.;'