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KOI KE HOE, PublUbm. ENTERPRISE OREGON. Kipling's "Beware if the Bear that Walks Like a Man" is also popular iu Japan. In the eyes of the government em ploye, no man Is truly great unless hi birthday is made au official holiday. Wu Tins Fang ys the American civil war was not a failure. This seems to be about the first thin? Amer ican, that Wu has approved of. Brilliant remark by a New York ed itor: "It takes more than an ill or a hill to down a Theodore Roosevelt." The Hail and Express is the guilty sheet. A dor-tor says every mouthful of food should be chewed seventy-two times before it is swallowed. lie doesn't go so far, however, as to in sist thai a cash register should be used in order to prevent mistakes. "One of the best parishioners" of a certain well-known clergyman used to say that there were lour occasions when he made it a point to be in his place at church. "These were, when it was a stormy Sunday, when the church was without a pastor and some body had to read a sermon, when a stranger preached, and when his own minister preached." The comlusiiui In IrrrsrstimY. If a special collection unfortunately falls upon, a stormy Sun day,, any .minister may cohlidently tell this, anecdote on the following Sunday and Take the collection over again. Typlfua-tt'Jter broke iut some months ago on.-(be island. of craumore off the ooat o Itwltiud, and a 'panic seized both the islanders and the residents of the auiacent'maihlaiid. ' Due heroic doctor,' W'illiaTir Smyth, rowed himself every dsyi to the .island, and siugle bamftid. fought 'the disease. in the' midst of iiKert,v and tilth. When conditions iu.y he,t cabins became Intolerable, he carried the patients to his boat and rowed them over to the mainland and his' own house. He saved the little island community, but, worn out by his exertions, contracted the disease himself, and died. The people of the vicinity who refused to aid him in the time of dire need are now contemplat ing a memorial to his heroism. Frank C. Andrews nf Detroit cannot be so id to have spent his life in vain. Mr. Andrews is a young man who arrived in letroit a few years ago with a capital of By dint of nerve and quickness iu taking advan tage of opMrtuulties he seeured a foot hold in the speculative world aud from that time on made money rapidly, be coming a millionaire. Always a blat ant advocate of the lucky throw as op posed to caution, sound methods aud economy, says the Chicago News, he has done what he could to imperil the general prosperity of the public. Hav ing been lucky. Andrews, like other "young Napoleon of finance," seems to have concluded that he was luvluel bie. He invented several maxims which probably he himself believed at the time. He openly approved ieeu lation aud declared that "human life is too short for the slow processes of j thrift." It was his- theory that "no I man should work after he is 40." aud I he believed that all his good fortune ' came as "the result if taking chances." He found success consisted "in an in j domitable faith in your own proposi j tion." Probably his philosophical view olgainblingseenicd correct at the time. His boastful sayings doubtless iu no way overstated his faith in himself. I That he should have dipped into spec j illation i u:-e too often aud brought j himself Into a predicament in which i not even his "indomitable faith" could save him was Inevitable. He has suc ceeded in wiping out his fortune iu a hurry. Not being an earner or a saver, but having .been trained throughout his life to the Idea of getting money without labor. It is not surprising that he should have embezzled funds In trusted to his keeping. From the bank of wnieh he was vice president he took ?1. ."UO.i til', leaving abso lutely no security. His fortune is gone and so Is his credit. Any clerk who manages to set aside $- of his earnings weekly is now bet ter off than the erstwhile rich aud boastful speculator. Vouths who may be tempted into speculation would do well to note his example. LERICAL LIFE I The Amenities of Existence in the Parsonage Preaching Is Some times the Least of a Minister's Trying Duties. When Victor Emanuel succeeded his father on the throne of Italy it was freely predicted that his reigu would be a short one, but the young niuu has managed so wisely that he , is strong in the affections of his people, and were he to abdicate and stand for election as the president of republican Italy, he would probably win over all others. Of course the young king is liable to be assassinated at any time by anarchists of whom the country is full. Centuries of despotism have made these anarchists possible. In the re action against tyranny anarchism has been born. Victor Emanuel Is likely to go some day as did his father, King Humbert However that may lie, the king is following iu the footsteps of his father in modifying some of the most objectionable features of absoluteism. Republican sentiment is strong In Italy and it is with the republican In a governmental way that the kiuf; has to deal. They have a large vote La the parliament and come near to control ling. If Victor Emanuel had shown the Impulsiveness naturally attaching to most young rulers he would have been deposed before this. Hut he has been wise enough to make concessions as they have been demanded by public sentiment. He has instituted reforms aud reduced taxation. He has heard all grievances and disposed of all mat ters purely on their merit. Somebody wants to know If long balr is an evidence of genius, and points to the shaggy-locked artists who have become famous. Long hair is mostly an evidence of eccentricity, combined with shrewd business judg ment on the part of the owner of the mops. We worship imported genius In this country. Sometimes we make fools of ourselves iu the presence of those who have attained a high place In the art of pleasing the eye or the ear. And Europe learne d that Ameri ca did not expect to see Genius appear In a business suit. The public de manded men who looked the part, men who were not like other men in ap pearance. The result was a few steam er loads of ' fellows who could tiddie and paint and sing, all needing a hair cut, .and most of them willing to adopt any kind of a freak make-up in order to coax dollars out of American pock ets. It is cheap advertising. Do you suppose that, a bevy of excited New York women would have assailed raderewski with kisses and tears had be looked like a fat-faced, prosperous broker or merchant? It is doubtful. There Is romance in the piano-playing Pole's hair; romance aud soul and all sorts of occult possibilities. It makes a lit setting for a pair of dreamy eyes, and It appeals to the audience before the great artist has dealt the piano the opening thump. Perhaps when America gets deeper Into art and mu sic It will be possible for Euroiean celebrities to shed their locks and yet maintain their hold on the hearts of the public. The time is not ripe yet, because of the popular love for the spectacular. For many years there has been an almost continuous discussion of what might be called the age question. It I has been said that as men grow old j they lind it hard to secure employ j ment, and sociological investigations have shown that the old age of the ar tisan or the laborer is often one of considerable hardship. For the last few weeks in particular attention has been called to the alleged discrimina tion of certain employers against men over 4.. It was for this reason that Sir. Schilling, in addressing the Chi cago Philosophical Society, said that one of the three, things that the Na tional Civic Federation should do was to find an answer to the query: How is the man over 4."i to make his living'; It cannot Ik- denied that this question presents some ditiiculties. At the same time the hundreds of thousands of men over -i.l who are still capable of their best work show clearly that no iH'i-fectly precise age limit can le set. The hero of Addison's satire In tile Sectator papers died of old age at 'J4. The captain of the Evanston life saving crew is doing the capsize drill with great agility at an age which is so advanced as to be a subject of endless singulation among the stu dents of the university. The vital powers last longer In some men than in others. Some men die in their boots and some after they have shifted to the slippered pantaloon. One cannot say: Thus long shalt thou work and no longer. In the case of artisans, In some trades, who have ceased to be capable of as full a day's work as they once accomplished, there is still the device of piece work, which will, to some extent, relieve the situation. If a man is paid according to what he does the employer cannot complain. It is, of course, to be expected that If the employer is paying his men by the day he should want men who can do a full day's work. If, however, he is paying them by the piece, any ten dency to discriminate against older men who may do less work than the young ones is largely checked. As tin worker passes the period of his greatest ellicleucy and declines In strength and skill, he can still receive a return for his labor, and though his earnings will doubtless decrease, they will decrease only In proportion to his failing powers. vfSI II with a good salary," said a young preacher seeking au ap pointment to an old clergyman high In the councils and respect of the denom ination with which he was connected. "Young man." rejoined the (senior, "If salary is your object you had better go Into any other vocation than the uilu Istry." The old man was right, for In looking over the salaries aud con templating the talents of the men en gaged in clerical work, It Is easy to see that most of them would probably be able to succeed much better. Iu a iinanclal way. iu almost any other call ing than that which they have chosen, and that th same amount of work, iu some other direction, might have made them independently wealthy. P.ut a preacher should not. anil, as a rule, does not preach merely for the sake of the salary attached to the place he tills. Of course, he wants a support, and a support in a style commensurate with that of the people whom he serves, but If he expects to make money out of preaching he Is destined to be woefully disappointed, for, at the best, after tlie year is ended he liuds himself fortunately situated if his bills, are all paid. Iiuring the year he and his wife have generally one long ceaseless struggle to make both ends meet, aud often with Indifferent success. He must be eco nomical where other men are liberal; ho must learn to go without luxuries and even without many things which by most persons are regarded as ne cessities. He must make his old black coat do duty for season ufter season. attempt to discover any bumor what ever. Hesides this, bis Interest, like that of most men f every class, cen ters largely In bis own profession aad ! fellow-professionals, and bis humor naturally takes the same turn. To him It seems u good Joke to hear that Hrother A. went to cburcb last Sunday morning and did not discover that he had left his sermon at home until the j last hymn had been sung before ser j limn time, the last cougher had cough ed his last cough, preliminary to set j tliug Into au attitude of attention, and ; the entire congregation had prepared I to hear m silence the words of wisdom I that were to fall from his lips. To the man of another profession, such au I incident does not seem excruciatingly j funny, and not a few would sympa- thze warmly with the unlucky shep ; herd wiio found himself suddenly iu the presence of his sheep without any thing to say to them; but to the preach er Hrother A.'s predicament furnishes amusement only, for he thinks that Hrother A. should be ready-witted enough to go ahead with u few re marks, even if his sermon was a mile away on his study table. He limls himself also able to extract some degree of amusement from even the potty Impositions that are daily practiced on him or his brethren, for it is a well-understood fact that a preacher is fair game for everybody to pluck at. and every day small swindles are perpetrated on him, for no other reason than that he is a preacher. Not long ago a clergyman of the city re ceived an invitation from a church elsewhere to preach for them ou an A QUIET S1AKKIAGE IN THE PARLOR. and his wife must retrim her hat to make It look like new, and make over her last winter's dress so as to be de cent iu the eyes of her husband's peo ple, else they will complain, for It Is a well understood fact that the preacher, 1 the preacher's wife, Ills sou, his daugh ter, his man servant aud his maid ser j vaut. if he is so fortunate as to have ; either, and even the stranger within his gates, are, severally and collective ly, the property of the congregation, to criticise and gossip about and backbite aud abuse, from the rising of the suu unto the going down of the same and a few hours in the evening. All things considered, therefore, the 'preacher's life is far from merry. His fate is not more fortunate than that of the fa tuous "Constables" iu the Pirates of As an exempla of the destiny of those who embrace "get-rich-quiek" schemes and scorn the old-fashioned tuctbuds of industry and thrift one Tolstoi's Honest Criticism. If the test that Count Tolstoi applied on one occasion to his sons were made universal, criticism might possibly be more honest than at present, but It would not be agreeable. A lady's singing having displeased Count Tolstoi's boys ou one occasion, they retired to another room and show ed their disapproval by making a noise. Their father stood It for a time, and then followed them Into the other room. "Are you making a noise on pur pose'" he asked. The question was a close one, but was presently answered by a doubt ful "Yes." "Does not her singing please you?" asked the count. "Well, no. Why does she howl so?" respouded one of the boys. "Do you wish to protest against ber singing?" asked their father. "Yes." "Then go Into the room and say so. Stand In the middle of the room aud tell every one present," replied the Count. "That would be rude, but up right and honest. Your present con duct la both rude nnd dishonest." Iff gim itePi L BEQUESTI.NQ a contribution Great Country, but Few People. With a population of only 21u,0fX). Manitoba equals lu size the whole of Great Britain and Ireland, Penzance, who, after aligning them selves on the stage in a rank as nearly straight as an outline sketch of the big fiddle, with a roar unanimously declare that: Taking one consideration with another. The policeman's lot is not a happy one. But the clergyman's life bus its bright spots here and there, though, it may lie, none of them are very bright, and there Is no doubt at all thatHbey are entirely too few. There would probably also a question arise In the minds of some persons as to what con stituted a bright spot, for the bard worked preacher has so little in his life to be merry about that be might be able to find a good deal of eujoy nicut in matters over which others would scratch their beads In a rain especial occasion. He read the iuvi tation with some dismay, as It said not a word about expenses, and he was not lu a position to Incur ndditioual obligations. After much hesitation, he dually accepted the iuvitatron, went at bis own expense, delivered two ser mons, materially aiding the church which he visited, and returned, and still heard uot a word about his ex penses. A few days later came a let ter with the postmark of the towu be visited, aud he opened the missive with satisfaction, feeling sure that here, at last, was a check for the be had expended in aid of his brethren. His expectations were doomed to disap pointment, for instead of a cheek there was a request for a contribution to help furnish the church he had just aided to get rid of Its debt. Nobody would have thought of imposing in this way on anybody but a preacher, but. theu, a preacher Is everybody's man. aud the fact that he can uot, or as a ruie docs uot, complain is taken to mean that the skinning process is to him rather pleasant than otherwise. From his general cheerfulness iu ad versity a great many people have the idea that the preacher has a cumnan. j tively easy time; that he has nothing to uo um to preach, and as he only preaches twice on Sunday and a half hour each time his labors must neces sarily be very light. It Is true that If the preacher did nothing but preach be could not Justly be considered as overworking himself, but in most cler ical situations tJe preaching forms the smallest part of the work. There, for instance, are the meetings of the official board of the church to be attended, and this of Itself is no small nor easy task. The official board, according to popular superstition, is supposed" to transact the business of the church: to meet all its obligations and look after Its interests. As a matter of fact, bow ever, while there are some official boards that do all these things, and do tbera well, the general run of official boards consider their duty done when they nave tamed over a matter for three huurs without saying auytiiin- and have finally adjourned, leaving the ! whole thing In the hands of the preach er, orten. it must be confessed, he Is lucky when they are satisfied with do ing this, for not unfrequently It bap nens that after placing It In his bands I two or three of them go off as-l trv to accomplish It in as many diTerent i ways, giving rise to so many misun derstanding that the preacher, on con templating the muddle, seriously con siders with himself the proprietory of throwing up bis Job as the quickest ami easiest way out of the mess. Hut If any one supposes that the preacher does not earn his money. Just let the uulwllever take his stand be hind the pastor when a female depu tation Is to have a hearing. Some one has said this is the woman's age. and to Judge from the Influence wield ed by the fair sex. the saying certain ly appenrs to be Justified by the facta. Nowhere, however. Is the Influence of woman felt to a greater extent than In the church organizations, which, being to a certain extent social In character, depend on the female members to so considerable extent for effectiveness that he who said. "If It were not for with, -satisfied "consciences, belli, that they; have discharged a debt a duty at'the same tlino.,upV n tlou, have couferred material beoet ou their beloved shepherd. Tbej 1 well-uieanlng people; tfivy tllnk are doing right. The city preacher's Hfe'ig enll most brightly when t.Vre Is a t(( ding. It Is true he dies not deti,. much benefit from the occasion, forj usage Immemorial all wedding fee, to the preacher's wife, but accord to tile Scripture the preacher and ft preacher's wife are one so sfterJ( the fee Is generally exported wli,, will equally benefit both. A wedding usually brings In a very hat some return for the outlay of bri, force aud labor, hut there is lootfe variety of kuot-tylng with which even A DONATION PARTY. woman, Christianity would die out iu one century." bad uo little Justifica tion for his remark. So far as the female deputation is concerned, It may have any business or uo business at all; that is a secondary matter. The women have come to talk, and talk they will, though the heavens fall. The preacher knows they are coming of course they could uot keep that fact to themselves aud is generally pre pared for them; the preparation, in this case, commonly amounting to a deter mination to do whatever they want done, and to do It quickly, too, with out making the slightest objection. Therefore, when the feminine contin gent marches in with colors Hying, band playing and bayonets fixed, the wise preacher stands up, listens to the reading of the inevitable preamble aud set of resolutions, declares that the movement has his cordial support, that he will do all he can to forward It. Then there is evening at the church sociable. The old brother who sits in the amen comer is always there; so is the graceless young fellow who has come for the sole purpose of Inter viewing the old brother's daughter. Old und young and all other kinds, how ever, are. so to sieak. run In the same mould, ot more exactly, are crowded Into the same rooms, where they en dure each other's society with as lit tle show of Impatience as could be ex pected until the glad hour of parting comes, creating an enthusiasm that can not be mistaken. Hut whether tired or uot. whether the sociable Is a success or a failure, the preacher must stay to the last. The sociable would uot be a sociable without him, aud ' tlth!jiti lu fititfi tf luuu f ii ml11n of the quiet couple who want uo sbov or parade, but simply want to be mat rled. So they get a license und go li the preacher's house, nnd lay the cns before him. There is nobody at hon but the cook, so the cook is culled Ii for a witness, and the marriage cert inony is performed as well us tiie par sou can afford to do It In his mi'titi uncertainty as to the matter of fm He may get from nothing at all up to Pt 1 III! COKOOT 11 IS WKUMO.N. $"; the chances are that S'J.oll will h considered about the proper ligurp bj the groom, who, after inquiring, rt some perplexity, what the piwlift Is going to charge, produces the ui be bqd mentally appropriated for tbf purose, sometimes iu quarters aDi halves, from two or three pockets mi hands It over, eyeing it the while, u though' mentally calculating the olbfr uses In which It could more profitaUi be employed. i I, m II-. Ull fa CUT .J V A CHURCH SOCIABLE. even though youug and unmarried be ruust pay just as much attention to old Hrother Hiffkins aud to old Sister Biff kius nnd to Hiffkins' daughter Peg as to the young and interesting SHSS Flora fashlouahle mamma, looks in on the menagerie a moment from the door But if the sociable l8 a delusion and a snare, what shall be said of the do nation party? Not all preachers are compelled to endure this form of legal ised robbery, but those who are after one Infliction, never cease their suppll cation, to be delivered from a no, "be. The principle of the donation party Is that of rendering assistance to tl)! pastor, that Is to say. of assuming a wonder ul amount of generosity by pretending to make blm a present Z that to which he Is Justlv mm ? practical.,, the benefits n JnZ i the other side. The donatorTb nRa varie y of artlcles which the pastor and bis family ' J? ernlly neither nee.l " eea' "jontb's supply 0f P -good time as the, can and depart Bt all other cheering incldeuta to ue nre or tue parson are thrown w the shade by a revival In his churl TbiS, With its otlrt.,o. o.,rvl,.pa. tb busy preparations made necessary M frequent sermons aud exhortation naturally dwarf, almost Into inslgnl'' cance. nil tim m,.. i...,. thai come within bis sphere. A refit"1 means Increased membership. M means success; success meuns en hanced reputation and probably opp tuultles for wider usefulness. word, the revival Is the end for woicb be labors nil th .. ,i nri will j s,uuuu Its attainment Is realized the blgbe1 measure of satisfaction of which clerical heart is capnble.-St Uv viooe-uenioerat Governnmnt l?,.. .. ,i A?uska, (im-farti,,,.... . - , A nlld v.Miucui IIUW owns a IUIBC ! uer of reindeer In Alaska. They ert uen mere Tor service In trunsP""' timi unit n .1... , , .i i ontl : me reu oiu L.apuiuu, Ciuus kind of animal. They live as n" me norm pole as Uncle Sum's I oiuug ua.