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Wallowa chieftain. [volume] (Joseph, Union County, Or.) 1884-1909, November 27, 1902, Image 6

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Publithral Every Unk.
Tooths In their Erst yea- at college
re not the only fresh men.
But almost any political doctor will
admit that the trust evil is evil.
Arctic explorers do not succeed tn
Ending much except pne another"s remains.
Wlith the possible exception of the re
pairs in a new house there's an end to
all things.
Mr. Baer has not us yet expressed
any fear of what may hapien to a
man who dies rich.
Nine men out of ten would rather find
$.0 worth of gold In an old pot tlmn
to have written "Paradise Lost."
A woman never can understand why
a man buys a new Ierby hat that, as
far as she can see, is Just like his old
If King Leopold hears what Marse
Watterson said of the "four hundred"
lie will take the next snip for New
The woman who worries over leav
ing her children to the care of a nurse
does not get very far into society nowadays.
Peary was about 400 miles from the
pole when he was forced to turn back.
Four hundred miles is a long way
where there are no sidewalks.
The American heiress wants quality
and the impecunious nobleman wants
quantity. Bring the two together and
the result Is a matrimonal merger.
Medical science has not yet discov
ered the smallpox germ, but perhaps
the doctors, like the rest of us. prefer
to look for it through a long-distance
King Alfonso wants to rebuild the
Spanish navy. All right. Alfey; re
build it if you want to. but when you
have it rebuilt be careful that It shall
never get into a fight.
The Duchess of Marlborough, It is re
ported, will 1 declared by the kaiser
to le of royal birth. There are others
In this country who are descended from
a long line of ferryboats.
It Is indeed startling to learn that
London now proposes that the mistress
shall go to school to learn how to treat
the maid. Is it possible that the wom
en's clubs have not settled all that?
If is a great relief to the country to
have Greenland proved an island by
Lieutenant I'eary. We laid awake one
night last week, fearful lest It might
turn out to be a simple peninsula.
A man has committed suicide leav
ing a note saying: "I have Just found
out what an ass I am." If this sort of
intelligence spreads. Chancellor An
drews may stop worrying about overpopulation.
It was Zola's misfortune that though
his novels were written for reformers
they attracted not reformers, but muck
hunters. Clean-minded folk declined
to wade through undeniable filth to
dubious social reform.
The Gregson incident. In which a
British officer was whipped and ducked
because he was "socially undesirable."
Seems to indicate that the lesson of
the Boer war on the worth of "social"
standards In armies is not yet thor
oughly learned.
The experiment which the govern
ment has been making in enlisting sail
ors for the navy from the interior of
the country has been successful. Sev
eral hundred farmers' boys from Kan
sas, Iowa, Kentucky and Nebraska
Lave been in training on the ships Lan
xaiter and Hartford during the past
Tew months, and their instructors say
thai they are making excellent sailors.
Most of the boys got their first smell
of salt water when they boarded the
The haste which various scientific
gentlemen make to announce that
Peary's last expedtion is not a failure
betrays a prompt recognition that the
general estimate is likely to be that
way. Peary's expectation of conquer
ing the pole did not thunder so loudly
in the preface as Baldwin's did. But
it was nevertheless predicated on the
confident assertion that by preparing
bases of supply and arranging for a
steady advance that Icy citadel was
certainly attainable, Yet in the finale
It comes to the same result as Its prede
cessors. Tradition says that the Queen of
febeba asked Solomon to thread an in
tricately pierced stone, and that he did
so by means of a hair tied to a living
worm. A long sewer in an Ohio fac
tory recently became clogged, and a
sou of Solomon came 1o the rescue.
Tying a long ball of twine to the shell
of r. mud-turtle, he put the animal into
the entrance of the sewer and turned
on a stream of water. The turtle bur
rowed his way through the refuse, was
"entered on" at each manhole, and
emerged victorious at the outlet A
rope attached to the twine, a swab and
strong arms accomplished the rest
swiftly and economically.
A character in one of Arthur Sher
burne Hardy's novels said, in answer to
somebody who wanted to argue with
him: "When I see two men arguing
I see two donkeys in a treadmill. Write
out what you want to 6ay and I will go
home and think about it." The appli
cation of this trenchant remark win
hit aliout nine out of ten of those who
indulge In arguments. They rarely do
much good. They are of use to certain
temperaments, lecaue they aid in fa
cility of expression. It is said that
Gladstone acquired his command of
language from the custom which ob
tained in his family of arguing every
question, small and great It may have
leen good for genius, but It could not
have been a comfortable family to live
in. Most argument intended to con
vince is a dead failure, because the per
sonal pride of the antagonist Is aroused,
and he is only strengthened In his own
position. This, again. Is not a good
thing, because It usually means that
the habit of seeing only one side of
a subject Is confirmed. There are two
sides to everything, whether we see
them or not. Just as there are to the
moon. People who cannot argue with
out indulging in personalities ought
never to do It Those who cannot do
without the to quoque argument
should also le discouraged, and equally
unworthy of attention are those who
tempt them. It Is hardly in human na
ture, when one Is told that one's rela
tives, or political party, or church, has
certain faults, to refrain from pointing
out that the other person's belongings
have faults Just as tod. Yet this proves
nothing except that human nature Is
Imperfect and that the inn is always
prone to call the kettle black.
Economy and Matrimony.
THAT admirable exponent of certain modern ideas. Doro
thy Dix. has been explaining the reason why many mod
ern men uiij nuiideus particularly the uieu do not
marry. She says that with the well-to-do classes in
general it is "an open question whether the marriage that
will require the crucifixion of their tastes and the dmiy and
hourly sacrifice of their comforts will return sufficient divi
dends In happiness to make it a paying investment." She
also points out tiie obvious fact that an income which will sup:
port one person in luxury will not double itself by magic when
there are two people living on it, and consequently oe or
both of the permu concerned will have to alter in taste or go
unsatisfied. Site also says, "No one would undervalue the
beauty and sacreduees of love, but H is a cold fact that it is
not enouzh capital on which to pet married." Then ah goes
on to talk about starvation and shabby clothes, and the cacniiee
of the taste and habit of a lifetime, and so on.
This expmsaon of opiuion undoubtedly agrees with the feel
ings of a gnod many modem young people, married and un
married, bnt It would be a considerable mistake to suppose that
it represents the mind of any large percentage of the population
of this country, even of the well-to-do and intelligent classes.
It is absurd to talk of starvation and privation in connection
with a couple living on the ordinary income of a clerk or pro
fessional man. The only question is whether they are willing
to cut their coats according to their cloth, and take in the
comfort of each other's society and the pleasure of bringing
up their children, the recreation which they lined to get out of
other amusements. If they are not willing to do this, it is
quite true that they would better not get married. The coun
try ran da without that kind of married peopl. Washington
Time. .
Researches in modern science con
tinue to hold out the most flattering
promises. Human beings are to live
longer, the Ills that flesh Is heir to
are to disappear and perhaps even
death may have no terrors. Exjterl
ments are being made by the State of
New York to determine the character
and amount of food needed to keep
the human body In the best possible
condition. By means of respiration
calorimeter the healthful demand for
food by different iersons can be
known. The man who Is eating too
much or unsuitable food food that
does not supply muscular tissues or
energy can know at once what to
do and what changes to make to se
cure the needed benefits. The United
States government too. is carrying on
experiments testing the effect of vari
ous food adulterations upon health,
rtllizing a dozen volunteers. Dr. Wi
ley, chief of the Bureau of Chemistry,
will determine the value or harm of
many articles of diet whose virtues
are now questioned. Reports come
from Borne to the effect that a promi
nent physician there is making expe
riments to determine the depth of a
person's sleep. The results show there
are certain periods when the sleeper
Is mure easily awakened than at oth
ers, and by use of a specially design
ed instrument it can be known at just
what time a man ought or ought not to
rise. Word comes from Turis that
Germ-proof houses are at hand. There
are to be no more palatial residences
holding the germs of all the ages.
Single-storied houses are to be the
models. These houses are to be built
of porous earthenware and to be set
on gravel. The roof will be tiled, not
slated, and the windows will reach
from top to bottom of the walls. In no
room will there be corners to harbor
dust and bacteria. The skirting will
curve into the hardwood floors Instead
of striking them at right angles. There
Is to be no place for disease. From
Paris, too, comes the assurance from
wiseacres that old age Is to be abol
ished, or rather extreme old age Is to
become enjoyable, through occasional
fasting. By this cheap process bodily
ills are to disappear, youth Is to be
renewed and man to enter on a new
career. As if all these assurances were
not enough to make life worth living,
an Illinois physician has come for
ward saying he has raised the rienH
and can do tt again. These are only a j
few of the ho)es held out by modern
science, but there Is still opportunity ;
for other wonders. The most helpless
Invalid and the most aged have reason '
to cheer up, expect perfect resoration '
of health and the Joys of new life.
Petroleum as a Beverage. j
The Medical Society of Paris has!
expressed the opinion that it Is neces-1
sary to adopt some measures against!
the alarming spread of petroleum I
drinking. At first It was thought that'
this habit had sprung up from the in-1
creased taxation on alcohol Imposed
by the French government but an in- i
vestigation showed that this was not)
the case; the habit had been prevalent '
some time previously in certain dis-l
triets and bad spread with great rapid-)
ity. The victim of the petroleum habit
"does not become brutal, only morose.
Opinions differ among physicians as
regards the effects of petroleum drink
ing on the human system, but all agree
on the nariufulness of this new vice, j
Getting Rid or His Enemies. I
First Small Boy Did you throw any j
old shoes after your sister when she 1
rent to 11 eel m1 t !
Second Small Boy Not much! I
threw all my mother's slippers. Phila
delphia Record.
Crime in Buenos Ay res.
Buenos Ayres has issued Its criminal
statistics for lttol. They include DC
murders, 244 attempted murders, 1.710
assaultB. and over O.ooo thefts, burgla
ries, and swindles.
When a man oiiens up a business the
papers soy he has a large circle of
friends, and after the accounts begin to
accumulate In his ledger be begins to
believe it
Training for Home Life.
IT is the old conventionality that the business of woman is
always to make a home for man. and that man's sphere lie
always outside the home, that causes much of modern wom
an's discontent, and aeainm which she protests.
The purpose of all training, she insists, is to push the boy
out into the world and to keep the girl in. and it is from tais
inequality and injustice that she demands emancipation.
The view is a mistaaken one. however, the final object in the
education of both sexes being the same to fit them for living
at home.
In fact it Is and always has been the conviction of man
kind that the life of both women and men should be lived at
home, and accordingly the aim of parents is to prepare their
sons and danchter to properly discharge their duties toward
the home. Their desire is to see both happily settled in homs
of their own. but recognizing the difference between the fexes.
and the greater share of responsibility assigned by nature to
the man. they give the boy the training necessary to enable
him to found and maintain the home, and to the giri the train
ing to carry it on.
If the aim of the parents is a mistaken one. it is at least
implied impartially to both sexes, so that there can be no vaiid
claim of injurtiee on the part of either.
If, as the great majority of the world believes, the first
duty of woman is to the home, the traininc of the man con
templates also the same duty for him. Philadelphia Ledger.
Why Negro Education Fails.
ONE of the reasons why education as applied to the
Mack race in the United States is a practical failure is
because the purpose of education is ridiculously mis
conceived by many, perhaps most, of those who nttend
the schools which Northern philanthropy has established
in various places in the South. Nine young negroes out of ten
who go in for education do it with the notion that education
will enable them to live without work. For the same reason
the ranks of the black ministry throughout the South are
always full, being recruited from the product of the schools,
which put forth each year a larce number of persons "educat
ed" to a point where they despise manual labor and are eager to
catch at any chance which promises them an easy and semi
idle hfe. The religious and moral status of these seif-elected
spiritual leaders of the race may be judged from the fact that a
few months ago there were fifty-nine black preachers in the
Georgia State penitentiaries. Portland Oregonian.
Are Babies Becoming Extinct?
THET.E is little place in city life to-day for babies. Land
lords prefer to let houses to families that have no children
to do damage to the property and aunoy the neighbors.
Apartment houses are generally closed acainst the Krtle
ones. I ogs may be accepted, but no children. The appli
cant for a place as janitor, steward, coachman, or any of a
doxen other places of domestic service may be allowed to have a
wife and perhaps bring her with bim for service, but the ma
hogany doors will not swing open to servants' children. The
poor widow who is forced to make the living for herself and
little ones finds them a barrier wherever she turns.
u t.w .,ft.,n .vo- at An the customs of city life tnrn
the children of the poor from a Messing into a curse and an
insupportable bnrden. All too often are parents that love their
children u dearly as the rich love their own. forced by harsh
necessity to place them in institutions or desert them, and
when the cause is sifted to the bottom the fault is found to be
less with the parent than with the senseless nnd heartless cus
toms nnd conditions put upon them by those who easily could,
if tliev would, change it all.
And the most pitiful part of it from the broader view point
is that the world is suffering a lack of development of it best
material for futu-e mnnhood and womanhood. It Is to the chil
dren of the poor that the world has ever looked for the best in
the future. If the children of the city's poor are discriminated
against must it not I said, too, thnt the children of the city's
rich are being eliminated? The decrees of society render it
inconvenient anil unfashionable to have children, and most of
the great mansious know them not Ie Moines News.
1 1
Work Does Sol Shorten Life.
THE report of the census bureau, which declare that
since 1S10 the median of American longevity has in
creased T.4 years, point to many vital conclusions.
Among these, it proves that with the Introduction and
enormous patronace of the railroad, steamboats, elec
tric cars and all other means of rapid transit we have reached
and safely paed that stage in mechanical development when
the attendant low of human hfe is at the maximum. It also
speaks eloquently of the progress In the science of medicine and
surgery, the improvement and increase in the number of
hospitals and public places of refure. It shows the triumph
of law aud order, the approximate perfection of our police
system and the growth of all those safeguards with which
society surrounds Itself.
But above these thincs. it gives the lie to the blatant alartniwt
who all these years has harrowed us with hia cry that tht
ceaseless commercial activity of the day, the rush for fortune
and fame, are burning the candle of longevity at both ends.
We have been ponderously warned that the American raca
was so rapidly consuming its vital enercy that each of na
would soon be. at the age of 50, a tottering wreck, mentally
and physically incapable. But the triumph over the world In
commercial, scientific and economic progress, we are now told
on indisputable authority, has not been achieved at such a
sacrifice. It seems that the harder we work, the lustier we
wax. and the longer we live. Anteus-Hke. we rise after each
fall with added vigor and accumulated aggression. Detroit
The Men Who Break Down.
WHEN a man standing it the head of a vast bust
ness hreaks down the papers liegin to talk of the
enormous pressure of modern life, especially in the
lines of finance and industrial activity. There are
railway presidents who stand a great amount of
business strain, but they waste none of their energies, and are
temperate, as all men of great affairs must be, if they would
hold their own in these busy days.
While a great business involves larre responsibilities, a
strong man at the head of it will be found to have selected
capable assistants, often younger men with great power of
resisting strain. The railway president bank president or head
of a tniBt has his staff,: his business systematized, and a large
part of his worth to his corporation consists in his ability
to pick good men for responsible places.
When one comes to look over the list of men broken down
in business it is amoug those having small business that the
greater number will be found. The man in a small way rarely
can afford to have capable assistants: he must "do it all him
self." and hence worry and over-doing. There is more of a
chance for brain fac in a small shop or agency than in a big
business. Mexican Herald.
iiKMtv I'uirrs.
Career of Henry Fhippa, Who Beceutl
Cave fl04l,000 to the Boera.
neury Pblpps, whose recent contri
bution of $100,000 for the relief of des
titute Boers In South Africa has at
tracted wide atten
tion. Is one of the
dlrwctorAiof the
Carnegie Steel
iT Sw' """Pany and is
V U reckoned one of
V,'.uVvT I America's eti,
men. His fortune
Is est I m a ted at
Mr. Phlppg WaB
born of poor pa
rents In Allegheny
City. Pa.. and whii..
a boy In short trousers hired out as e
messenger In Pittsburg, ne and An
drew Carnegie ran errand together
for several years and as messenger
boys formed the partnership; which has
always existed between Vem. They
schemed together as youths and while
very young men embarked in the bus.
ness which has made them both mulU
mlllloiialrea the making of steel.
Many years ngo Mr; Phlpps' fortune
had expanded to the million mark and
his lufluence was felt 4a the financial
world; but he was habitually modest
and shrank from publicity, wherefore
his name was but seldom heard. In
the steel business he become a factor
almost as powerful as his associate,
Mr. Carnegie, and his fortune grew
apace. In 1901 he was publicly classed
with the 3.S27 other American million
aires and since that time he has been
ranked with the country's wealthiest
Two yeai-8 ago he left Pittsburg,
which had been his home as well aa
the scene of his successful operations,
nnd settled In New York. He at once
lought nearly the entire block on 5th
avenue, between 87th and 88th streets,
and secured plans for a palace to cost
approximately $1,000,000. Work on
this magnificent palace is now under
His donation to tie Boers created no
surprise to those who are well ac
quainted with Mr. Phipps. Numerous
Institutions in Pittsburg, Allegheny
City and other cities have been bene
fited by his charities and lnnumorable
unfortunate persons have been aided
by him.
Arch Erected in Richmond by Dan En
ters of Confederacy.
A beautiful memorial arch is being
erected In Richmond. Va to Jefferson
Davis by the United Daughters of the
Confederacy. It was designed by Lou
Is A. Gudebrod nnd the cost will be
Honor the School Teachers.
THE Gloucester school teacher who has retired from her
work after forty-two years teaching in the schools of
that place, during whieh she was absent but twice,
should be looked upon with profound respect An Ameri
can humorist has said that a good teacher "should Ik
made a brigadier general and have a horse and wagon to do
his riding around in." and the sentiment is that of all wht
understand what one who presides over a room in a school
building endures. A large proportion of teachers become
broken in health by the nervous strain after five or six years,
and physician regard teachers of experience as among the
hardest patient to help permanently because the attack of
any illness finds so little of reserve strength to oppose it. The
world respects its teachers, but its honor and applause goes
to those who do nnusual deeds, or acts requiring impulsive
courage. It is. however, the regular work of carefullv trained
and kindly people that upbuilds the Intellectual and "spiritual
life of mankind, and none perform deeds of more lasting va.ua
than the quiet toilers between the blackboards and the desks.
Boston Transcript
If the wish Is father to the thought,
the thought must be sunny.
Old Farmer Found Drummer Wae Well
The drummer who had missed the
early morning train came into the tiny
7x9 junction station waiting room and
glanced about bim. Drummers always
glance about when they come to sta
tions, big or little They do It because
it la a habit the same as winking one
eye knowingly, poking a crooked
thumb over the shoulder or when one
says about once every half minute dur
ing a casual talk on crops, weather ana
so on: "Don't chew know?" These
arc hard things to get rid of. So is the
But this was not an ordinary drum
merat least be so impressed the se
date old gentleman who was busy
studying a time table by the window.
The old gentleman got up, went to
the drummer and held out the time
table, asking.
"If a train got to Pulaski about 7 in
the mornin' would that give me time
to visit Elder Spriggius. who lives jist
outside the town, before the other train
came along?"
There was mourning at the end of
the finger that pointed out Pulaski.
There was hair in the ears of the old
man and a misty veil on his glasses
hooked over his eagle-like beak. There
was also a curious dip to his straw hat
not unlike the swirl of the busy col
lege man out for a risque vacation
$W panama or not The drummer was
one of those chaps of ready sieech and
quick response and he answered, in a
pleasant tone:
"If you get to Pulaski on that early
train you certainly will have plenty of
time to visit Elder Spriggius and enjoy
his hospitality before the next train
comes along." Then the speaker beam
ed an amiable smile. But the old
granger never bated a wink of the eye
nor puckered a risible tnuacle.
"And if the way is clear for real
good eippln' 'long the rails at a two
forty Klory Temple gait do yon really
think a pusson could reach Carthage
before sundown and In time to help
Ezra Snow milk the cows and do the
evenln' chores?"
"I don't think anything about it I
know It can tie done. I did it one week
ago yesterday and found Ezra welL
excepting for a little twinge of rheu
matism. Always was troubled that
way, you know, Ezra was."
The old chap drew In his upper Up
until the tuft on hie chin tickled his
nose. He sneezed, gave bis straw hat
another tip forward, scratched his ear
with his lean finger, and asked:
"By doln' a cross-country stunt for
four miles and divergin' to the left Jist
'fore crossin' the canal lock the other
side of Boonville, do you think an old
pusson who used to peter out the beat
wrestler in these parts, back, side or
rough-an'-tumble holt could fetch up
'bout time for dinner at the Yaller
tavern on the four corners kept by Eli
Jones, who can take care of fourteen
men and hossee without going to the
neighbors? Do you think It can be
done by an ole pilgrim who draws a
penshun of asthmay from the Civil
War if he should start now without
further parley?"
"I took the same route day before
yesterday and I know it can be done.
Ell is still at the Taller tavern, doing
a brisk business, same as usual." And
again the drummer tossed the old chap
a knowing smile, says the New York
Times. And again the old chap never
twitched a balr of the eyebrow nor
curved a bristle of the lip.
"And if I should take the evenln'
boat from Albany I'd reach New l'ork
in time for break good Lord! He's
gone! Snatched the train on the zip
and went quicker'n a wink. They're
a mighty knowln' lot and I'm glad 1
got information; for I may take It Into
my head to try a Ja'nt sometime my
self. Good-by, Si. So glad I happened
along and found a man with p'lnts."
gentleman's eyes twinkled, says the
Pittsburg Bulletin, as he drew from
his pocket book a small sheet of note
paper. "I sent the boy a toy monkey that
Plays all kinds of pranks when It's
wound up," said he, chuckling. "Sent
It to him for his birthday. Now you
listen to this letter of thanks I got
from him tolay. He's Just 8 years
"'Deer Uncle Ned, I am delighted
with the munkey, thank you. He
makes me think of you very often.
And whenever mamma winds him up
and he begins to Jump, mamma and I
feel as if we were back at your bouse
where all those toys are. and mamma
says. That's your Uncle Ned all over"
Good-by from your grateful Hal "
, MI.t,hJ!" 8ald tb ld gentleman, as
he folded up the letter, "that I shall
be more careful what I send hini for
hia next birthday."
Thanking Cncle Ned.
"My niece Mary was always a well
meaning girt," remarked the old gentle
man, "but she would say the wrong
thing every time, and she's got a boy
who is going to equal her." The old
W orld'e Shortest Street.
It is the shortest in Paris, and It is
believed In the world. It is named Rue
des Degres. It consists only of four
teen stairs, has no shops, no doors, and
no dwelling houses opening onto It
No carriages or carts can drive up or
down it and the greater part of one
side of it Is ii.rt or on
- iu an arra v of
posters, let the authorities have taken
the trouble to give this thoroughfare"
a name. 6
Too Much for the Barber
"Ton can't guy that fellow." 8'id the
"Did you try Itr asked "nexf
"Yes. When he got into my chalr t
asked bim if he wanted a hair cut in
he said he didn't care if I cut Wh of
them."-Indianapoll8 News '
There Is very little difference" between
a good person and a bad one. Get w!n
acquainted with a good man. ana you
wlU find much toxundemn, and an Int"
mate acquaintance with a bad mn
will result in the discovery of much to
about $70,000, which it has taken the
daughters several years to get together.
The site of the monument Is the
choice of Mrs. Jefferson Davis, who,
though opposed to the memorial at
first finally consented, and the arch
will be unveiled in Monroe Park at
Richmond in the early spring.
FV . r .- r " U 'If Mil, lav Tk ,
Photographically speaking, nothing
Imaginable can be more difficult to
"snapshoot" than a leaping salmon.
Nobody can tell when, or Just where,
he is going to Jump, and accurate focus
is out of the question. Probably the
accompanying picture Is the most suc
cessful photo of a leaping salmon ever
taken. It was made by an officer of
the United States fish commission on
the Island of Afognak, off the coast of
Alaska, and the big fish is Jumping up
a fall to get to the spawning grounds
In the headwaters of the stream.
Labor on Railroad Feeders
The average person whb 'picks up
railroad time folder does not realize
the amount of work which the prep
aration of such a publication involves.
A big Western railroad, for Instance,
has a general time folder made up
from sixteen different divisions opera
ting time tables. The folder ctXiala
2.000 names of towns, gives the sched
ules of over 500 trains and whenever
there is a change In time C0.O00 figures
have to be carefully checked and cor
Cats In Switzerland.
Swiss ornithologists declare that caw
have become so numerous In Swltzet
land as to threaten the extermination
of aU birds of the country.

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