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: -V CLAYTON. NEW MEXICO. Another "Bunko' King" Is dead. hoever. tlit;e are plenty of bunkoert and bunkoed left. Under existing circumstances It must be a common thing for the office to seek the man la Finland.. These stories of cats adopting moth erless rabbits make the average boarder look with suspicion on rabbit lew. New York has lost twenty-two mil lionaires In one year. They left all their wealth behind, however, and will cot be missed. - Members of an excluBlve London women's club call themselves "the oysters," and the latter, being dumb, cannot resent It. Now It is claimed that whistling will cure consumption, even If It does cause profanity and a desire at times to commit murder. He planted firm his dainty feet npoa the pavement fcllck with sleet and then be planted hard bis hoad upon tbe spot bis feet had tread. The Washington baseball team has discarded the name of Senators, as being a hoodoo, and Is casting about for a new one. How would Deficits do? According to t"ho city treasurer's re port, we owe a trifle nioro than $17, EO0.O00. It looks as though we should be driven to marry money. Toronte Mall. A Chicago mnn who describes him self as wealthy and generous adver tises for a poor but honest wife. Tbere's no doubt about bis getting a poor one. An effort Is to 'be 'rondo to "bust tho golf ball trust. It Oils can be done a good many people will cease to cere how the fight on the meat trust comes out. If you would bo convinced that It pays to advertise Insert an advertise ment stating that you. are rich and de sire to wed; then hire a secretary to open the letters. Ingenious Inventors have devised a way of "turning a buggy Into an auto mobile." An awkward driver, how ever, can do the sumo thing much more expeditiously. The New York custom house Inspec' tors are to adopt a new custom, that of wearing coats with fifteen pockets. Feems to be a good deal of doughbag for cue small garment. The supreme court Jiv.tlre who held court In bed at his hotel while he was nursing a rheumatic foot, probnbly wasnt In any mood to listen to any trifling from tho lawyers. t 1 ! A man of the name of Extra Smith has been fined at Fottstown, Pa., for failing to support his wife. Perhaps the lady's trouble arose from the fact that he was always Extra dry. A Chicago woman has been award ed 999 damages because a railroad conductor squeezed her hand. ' In this case, It Is safe to say, tho lady docs not appreciate tbe mark-down. Mrs. Philip Carpenter tells a few club 6lsters at breakfast that man'a Ideal woman Is always the one "fur ther back." 'But never meaning, of course, the woman behind tho times That New' York physician who rec ommends that idiots be drowned has on Idea how much fun the world has with thm when they grow np and be glu writing opinions and theories like bis. The public would be vastly more in terested In jthat decision handed down by the supremo court against the beef packers had tho decision called for a shading In the price of beef teaks, v When a New York man was fined $25 tho ntljer day his wife and eight aunts and female cousins who were In court promptly swooned. What dread ful thlnfj would have happened If ho bad been fined $25.49? King Leopold of 'Jlelglum has added to his rcpntatlon' for eccentricity by going back from tho automobile to the horse.' It may be, of course the dispatch daos not say a simple case of "In the machine shop." The woman who secured a divorce after tho plea that her mother-in-law lad refused to lend her "one small egg" could have advanced no more seasonable argument unless (he mail egg had been a bit of coal. Slonx Falls has developed a young lady of 16 years v. ho .ran move tables, read minds, and perform wonderful fcato by psychic power. Of course, she Is a fraud, because no one has yet been uble to explain bow sho doet it. It ii noticeable that the most em phatic protests against football are rldom forthcoming In tbe fall of the year, when the earnest protestanta harcn't time to do anything but at ten 4 to their regular work or to to Jhe garnet. HEW MEXICO -.HEWS SUMMARY Legislative Proceedings. On Monday, February 27tb, Governor Otero sent the following nominations to the council and they were promptly confirmed: George W. Prkhard, so licitor general; W. G. Sargent, terri torial auditor; J. H. Vaughn, territorial treasurer; H. O. Bursura. superintend ent of the territorial penitentiary; Ill ram Had ley, superintendent of public instruction; A. A. Keen, commissioner of public lands; Charles V. Safford, traveling auditor and bank examiner. These are all reappointments, except that for superintendent of public in struction. The following are among the new bills Introduced: Council Bill No. 81, by Mr. Miller, An act to establish a reservoir at or near Elephant Buttes, New Mexico, and to protect the waters of the Rio Grande. A communication from the commission of Irrigation of New Mexico, accom panying Council Bill No. 81, was read. Referred to the committee on Irriga tion. Council Bill No. 82, by Mr. Read, to authorize the practice of osteopathy In the territory and to appoint a board of examiners to regulate the practice of osteopathy. Council Bill No. 84, by Mr. Martinez, An act providing for a branch agricul tural atatlon in Taos connty. Referred to the committee on territorial affairs. Conrrcll Bill No. 85, by Mr. Martinez, An art -amending nee t Ian 637 of the Compiled Laws of 1897, wfth regard to the removal of county seats. Referred to the committee on counties and coun ty lines. Council BUI No. 80, by Mr. Martinez. An act authorizing the building of school houses by the different school bnaids of the territory. Referred to the committee on education. Council Bill No. 87, by Mr. Winters, An act providing that prisoners serv ing a penalty for breaking city ordi nances, shall work on the public roads In such corporations. Referred to com mittee on rouds and highways. Council Joint Memorial No. 6, by Mr. Read, to the secretary of the interior, to be referred to the commissioner of Indian affairs, asking (hat the Navajo Indians of the territory be not allowed to take np all the waters within twenty miles of their reservation and that they be not allowed to break the game laws of this territory outside the limits of their reservations. Under suspen sion of the rules Council Memorial No. 6 was read by title the second time and waB ordered translated and print ed. Under further suspension of the rules. Council Memorial No. 6 was read by title on third reading and was passed. The committee on counties and coun ty lines reported on House Bill No. 39, An act allowing counties not having court houses to levy a tax for court house building purposes, recommend ing Its passage as amended by the committee. The report was adopted. House Bill No. 39 was read by title the third time and was passed. House Joint Memorial No. 4 was in troduced In the House by Mr. Lynch, An act petitioning President Roosevelt to continue his investigations -against the trusts and prosecute all violators of the lnw. The memorial passed un der a suspension of the rules by a unanimous vote. The following bills were Introduced In the House: House Bill No. 117, by Mr. Dalles, An act authorizing the county commis sioners to make a levy of taxes for the conttruction of bridges. Tho bill passed unanimously under suspension uf the rules. House Hill No. 118, by Mr. Sanchez. An act relating to community ditches and accquias and to amend and repeal certain sections of the Compiled Laws of 1897. Referred to the committee on Irrigation. House Bill No. 119, by Mr. Sanchez, An act providing for the erection and maintenance of a home for orphan chil dren at Wagon Mound. Referred to the committee on education. House Bill No. 120, by Mr. Sanchez. An act authorizing the consolidation of benevolent, scientific and .charitable associations. Referred to tbe commit tee on corporations. House Bill No. 121, by Mr. de Baca, An act providing for tho Oiling of va cancies In counly offices. Referred to the committee on territorial affairs. House Bill No. 122, by Mr. de Baca, n act prescribing the qualification of superintendent of public Instruction of the territory and for other purposes. Referred to the committee on educa tion. A message was received from the governor announcing that he had signed Council Bill No. 31, relating to community land grants In Dona Ana county; House Bill No. Ill, changing the name of Ieonnrd Wood county to Guadalupe; Council Joint Resolution No. 7, protesting against establishing a lepers' colony In New Mexico and that he had vetoed House Bill No. (59, by Mr. Stockton, adjusting tho salaries of county commissioners In certain counties. Tho veto was sustained by the House. House Joint Memorial No. 5. by Mr. Pendleton, addressed to the secretary of the Interior and protesting against the withdrawal from tho public domain of lands In Eastern San Juan county, and providing for the restoration of said lands to entry, was passed under suspension of tbe rules by a unanimous vote A Las Vegas dispatch of March 2d says: John Reynolds, who cut his wife's bead open with a hatchet, was brought to the city to-night, having been captured In Socorro. The woman made another statement Incriminating him yesterday. Secondary infection has set In and there Is no hope for her recovery. The council killed the bill providing penalties for giving or accepting bribes; an act providing for the ex emption from license fee of entertain ments by religious and benevolent so cieties; an act for the revision of the New Mexico statutes, and an act pro viding for the condemnation cf land for Irritation ourposei. Charges Against Governor Otero. A Santa Fe dispatch of February 27th says: There Is reason to believe that In spector Colon N. West of the United States army, who Is now in Santa Fe, Is here In connection with grave charges which have been filed in the war department in Washington against Governor Otero. These charges are made by W. H. Whlteman, recently re moved as adjutant general of New Mexico, and allege that the governor has appropriated to his own use and that of bis friends, quantities of sup plies, arms and ammunition furnished to New Mexico by the war department for the use of the militia, A complete copy of the charges was thown to a reporter of the Morning Journal here to-night. This document shows that General Whlteman was re moved from office, and that the filing of his affidavit followed almost Imme diately. The charges go Into detail of the many instances In which it is al leged that the governor made orders upon the adjutant general for supplies, arms and munitions, for his personal use or the use of his friends and busi ness associates. He then gives instances after In stance In which he honored the gov ernor's. order on him for blankets, can teens, campaign bate and other equip ment, which he says, were given to the governor's friends. He says Krag rifles were furnished to Page B. Otero, the game warden, to take on a bear hunt, as well as blankets and equip ment. "These things happened so often," says the former adjutant gen eral, "that I cannot now recall all of them. He (Governor Otero) haa at all times, used the mllitta property as If It were his owa property. He never gave me any directions about aoconntlng for It. He seemed to think that I was rascal enough to take care of him." New Mexico Telephone Lines. More than $200,000 will be spent by the Colorado Telephone Company in extending its line in New Mexico. This was announced at the annual meet lug of stockholders yesterday, says the Denver News of February 22d. Definite plans regarding the New Mexico improvements will not be made public until after the Colorado Tele phone Company votes to extend the lines and company in New Mexico. The meeting for this purpose will be held on March 21st. The stock of the New Mexico com pany is all owned by the Colorado Tel ephone Company, but the parent com pany must have its present by-laws amended to effect the changes. There Is no opposition to it. Immediately after the -change plans will be perfected for connecting Las Vegas, Albuquerque and Santa Fe with the present toll line from Denver to Las Vegas. "Most of the New Mexican territory Is not very well covered by telephone lines jow," said Treasurer E. B. Field, Jr., "and we propose to remedy this as soon as possible. It will mean much fur the development of me territory. Home rom the Navy. An Albuquerque dispatch of Febru ary 23rd says: After five years' ser vice In the navy, Arthur Spencer, son of Colonel and Mrs. E. W. Spencer, surprised his parents by arriving from the East to-day. En route to this city he stopped over at Chicago, where he was the guest of Garfield Hughes, both having served in the Spanish war In Cuba. Arthur Spencer was the first young man to enlist In Captain Max Luna's company. After the war In Cuba Ar thur enlisted In Uncle Sam's navy and during the five years he has visited almost every country under tho sun. He has been climbing the ladder and to-day Is turret captain In charge of twelve-Inch guns on a battleship. His furlough Is for four months, and after remaining here for several months he wni go to San Francisco to be assigned to service In Asiatic waters. New Railroad Incorporated. The St. Louis. Rockv Mountain A Pn. clftc Railroad Comnanv haa flleil In. corporation papers at Santa Fe. The company proposes to Duua a railroad from Raton to Eltzabethtown, along the Cimarron and Moreno rivers, in Colfax county, a distance of seventy five miles, and then continue It across Taos pass to Taos and the Rio Grande river. The capital stock Is 2.."i00,000 and the main offices are at St. Louis, while the New Mexico headquarters are at Ra ton. The directors and Incorporators are Hugo Koehler, Max Koehler, Or vllle H. B. Turner and Thomas B. Har kin of St. Ixwls, and C. N. Blackwell and Jeremiah Leahy of Raton. , Governor Denies Charges. A Santa Fo dispatch of March 1st says: Gov. M. A. Otero to-day denied In toto the charges made against him before tho war department by Gen. W. H. Whlteman, who was recently re moved as adjutant general of the ter ritory by the governor after seven years' Rervlce. The charges consist mainly of allegations that the gover nor ordered the misappropriation of certain pieces of commissary and equipment, for the safe keeping of which General Whlteman. was under $8,000 bond. But few people have an Idea of tho money spent annually for road Im provements by so great a railroad sys tem as the Santa Fe. New Mexico Is a yearly beneficiary of from a million to two million dollars, spent In that kind of work. One of the largest and costliest pieces of reconstruction Is In progress at present near Watrous, which alone will cost 250,000. It Is the rebuilding of seven miles of track along the canon walls and the span ning of the Mora river with a 600-foot steel bridge to cost $125,000. it Is In this canon that the Santa Fe sustained Its heaviest losses last fall by wash outs. Similar work was done In the Glorleta or Apache canon two years ago, and thus gradually, the Santa Fe Is constructing a line high above the flood level uud secure from every vicis situde of tbe weather. Santa Fe New Mexican. Tribute to Colonel Chaves. In the territorial council exer.:U5 on February 24th many beautiful tri bates were to the memory of Col. J. Francisco Chaves, whose assassin tlon last November plunged the wbo.t territory In grief. The Hon. Jacob Chaves, his succes sor in the council from tho county r Valencia, said: "Colonel Chaves may well be callei an Illustrious citizen and a great leade of public opinion In New- Mexico dur ing the past fifty years. He has belt the highest political position in tht gift of the people of the territory ana of his county. "In legislative matters he hai worked for them as a delegate to Con gress, and as a councilman in the As sembly since 1846, almost without In termission and upon very scant recom pense. "He served his country faithfully ani meritoriously for three years during the Civil War as a major and a lieu tenant colonel of the First New Mex ico Infantry. Under his command the regiment performed gallant and gool service, In battles against the Confed erates and against hostile Indians. "As a citizen and as a man his rec ord is of the best. He was generous to a fault and no needy man, woman or child ever applied to him in his or her distress, but that he aided that pei son to the best of bis ability, with money, by deed, or by wise counsel." Councilman W. E. Martin made a most eloquent address, In which he said: "When it Is said, "J. Francisco Chaves Is dead, a sentence Is uttered that for ages to come will be re-ccr. oed In every chamber and corridor ol this splendid capitol! "You wander about thla building, In vain effort to catch a glimpse of him. You go to the council chamber and In stinctively cast your eyes to the pres ident's chair; and realize for the first time that he is dead. "When an ordinary man dies some other man takes his place, but who will take the place of Colonel Chaves "In flesh and blood a pure Castlllan. he was In heart and soul a splendid specimen of Americanism. "He was an educator, at historian and an orator. He was an unique fig ure In New Mexican history. A born parliamentarian, the presidency of the council was by common consent his po litical heritage and he wielded the gavel with such urbanity ana skill that he extorted praise from his ' most radical political opponents. It would, however, be a work of superogation to speak of hid statecraft. There are other element3 of his character which if they do not shed luBter on his public career they did nevertheless like the soft glow of the firelight draw around him warm and faithful friends. His loyalty to his friends was proverbial. As Jon athan was to David; as Sciplo was to Laetlus; as Damon was to Pythias, so was J. Francisco Chaves to his friends. "His gentleness In this regard Is the evergreen that nourished by the tears of his friends will ever decorate his grave. "Mr. President, no man's death ever created such a void In the affairs of New Mexico as that of Colonel Chaves A great light has gone out. A figure, the most prominent that ever adorned the territory has passed away, we search the history of our territory In vain for his counterpart; we find It. not. In court and In camp he was the samo knightly hero. Like a great chief he was grand and picturesque." The council confirmed the nomina tion of ex-Delegate to Congress Pedro Perea of Bernalillo to be insurance commissioner, a new office created by this Legislature and carrying a salary of $2,400 a year. Hon. Nicolas Galles. the present reg ister of the United States law office at Las Cruces, while at Albuquerque on the 1st of the month, gave out the information that he was still In the race for appointment for governor of New Mexico. He says ho has strong and Influential backing and feels con fident of making a stiff fight for the office. Incorporation papers have been filed at Santa Fe by the Algodones Land and Irrigation Company. The in corporators and directors are Pedro Perea, Jacobo Perea and Justiano Cas tillo of Bernalillo, which will Ve the headquarters. The capitalization is $10,000 and the company will build an Irrigation canal from Algodones to Bernalillo, ten miles. The Farmers" Irrigation and Lano Company have filed Incorporation pa pers at Santa Fe, the Incorporators and directors being James O. Cameron. Fred F. Doepp, William U. Donnelly, M. S. Gorves and Louis O. Fullen, all of Carlsbad, Eddy county, which will be the headquarters. The company will build a fifteen-mile Irrigation ca nal out of the lower Pecos river In Eddy county. The capitalization 1b $25,000. A Roswell dispatch of March 2d says: Amado Peralez, a sheep herder, arrived in the city last evening with both feet badly frozen and Is In a pitiable plight. He' claims that his feet were frozen while at work forty miles south of the city on Ross Mill er's ranch, and that he became snow blind and could not work. This en raged Miller and he assaulted the Mexican, who was compelled to crawl two miles to a Mexican hut for as sistance. Miller was arrested to-day on a charge of assaulting Peralez, and pleaded guilty to the charge. Pablo Garcia, a bad man from Pol vadera, was delivered Into the hands of Sheriff Leandro Baca Tuesday and placed behind tho bars to serve out a fine for assault and battery, says the Socorro Chieftain. This same Garcia has a record that no self-respecting man would care to emulate. He has served one term in the penitentiary. His earthly career was once upon a time very nearly closed by a fellow prisoner in the county jail who used a chair as a persuader, and not without good reason. He was at another time sent to dreamland by a smash on the Jaw from the heavy fist of Deputy Bob Lewis, whom It would 'not be easy to convince that he struck hard enough to suit the provocation. Garcia Is an ili dlrposed fellow and tho only way to keep him out of trouble Is to keep him in confinement. CONDENSED TELEC.7A''$ John Alexander Dowle arrived lc the City of Mexico a few days ago. The annual Yale and Harvard boat races will be held at New Loudon, Conn., June 27th. Science hall of the Virginia Poly technic Institute, Vicksburg, Virginia, has been destroyed by fire. The Indiana Senate has passed a bill appropriating $5,000 for a statute of Gen. Lew Wallace to be placed in the capitol at Washington. The maid servants of Kief, In south western Russia, went on a strike a few days ago and paraded the streets until Cossacks were called out to disperse them. When the ice gorge In the Missis sippi went out it completely demol ished the new $250,000 government dyke and a $100,000 water protection In East St. Louis, 111. . A bill Introduced by Mr. Hawthorne Thwalte, Socialist leader In the Brit ish Columbia Legislature for an eight hour day in the British Columbia smelt ers, has been defeated. . Mrs. Anne Welghtman Walker has added $2 to her fortune of $00,000,000 by winning prizes for the best beans, primroses and mushrooms displayed at the annual meeting of the Pennsylva nia Horticultural Society. J. Plerpont Morgan added another old and valuable manuscript to his col lection A few days ago when for $4,000 he purchased from Tristram Coffin the original of Oliver Wendell Holmes' "Autocrat of the Breakfast Table." An El Paso dispatch says that Col. W. C. Green, who has started extend ing the Sierra Madra railroad into Mexico, intends to build to the Pacific coast without a stop, giving a straight line to the southern Mexican coast, ' It Is reported from Suez that 20,000 Turkish troops of the Damascus army corps, who had been ordered to Yemen to suppress the rebellion in that prov ince, refused to leave Akba because ar rears of their wages had not been paid. Henry C. Whitman, for years one of Chicago's leading lawyers and a mem ber of the Boston bar, died at Boston, February 28th, aged seventy-four. He was at one time connected with Abra ham Lincoln's law office, In Springfield, Illinois. The betrothal Is officially announced of Princess Victoria of Connaught to Prince Oscar, eldest son of the crown prince of Sweden and Norway. The announcement states that the engage ment has the entire sanction of King Edward. Orders have been received at Colon, on the isthmus, from Washington to resume tho installation of a wireless telegraph system with the station on the spot originally selected. It is ex pected that the work will be completed In tnree months. The plant of the Ironclad Manufac turing Company in Brooklyn was dam aged $50,000 by fire on the 28th ult. The principal owner of the property Is Mrs. Robert Seaman, formerly known as a newspaper writer under the name of Nelly Bly. A London dispatch says that Sir Henry Irving, who recently had a se vere ehUl, has suffered a slight relapse and haa canceled the remainder of his provincial tour. His physicians have Imperatlveely ordered him not to act for at least two months. The Economic Society of Central Eu rope, of which Professor Wolff of Leip zig University is president, has ap pointed a committee to report on how to readjust Germany's trade relations with the United States. The purpose seems to be to consider the possibility of acommerclal treaty with the United States. Over a million dollars' damage was done by a big fire at Hot Springs, Ar kansas, February 25th. Among the buildings destroyed were the Grand Palace hotel, Lee house, Moody house. Plateau hotel, Columbia hotel, the. county court house, jail, First Method ist church, the Jewish church and 225 residences and stores. Taotal Lang Sho Tl of Tientsin has been appointed Chinese minister to London. He Is at present In India ne gotiating a convention for the adhe sion of China to the Anglo-Thlbeb treaty. Lang Shao Ti was educated at Yale University and was formerly sec retary to Yuan Shi Kal, progressive viceroy of Pechlll province. Judge Kavanagh modified the In junction issued against the picketing of tailoring establishments and shops In Chicago by deciding that the strik ers should not be prevented from peaceably speaking to the non-union employes of the tailoring establish ments, as long as there was no sem blance of persecution. The transport Logan sailed from San Francisco February 28th for Manila via Honolulu and Guam. She carried 285 enlisted men of the Second squad ron of Eighth cavalry, 84G enlisted men of the Sixth Infantry, twenty-one enlisted men of the marine corps, four teen enlisted men of the hospital corps and a cargo of army supplies. The legislative committee which is Investigating irregularities In the financial accounts of Utah's commis sion to the Louisiana Purchase Exposi tion has appointed Representatives Jo seph, Stookey and Gandry as a commit tee to go to St. Louis and turn over every detail of the commission's work at the fair. Forged vouchers aggregat ing more than $2,100 already have been Identified. Maxim Gorky, the Russian author, had but a short glimpse of liberty on the 27th ult. Released on $5,000 ball, the noted author was immediately re arrested and conveyed to a place of confinement pending deportation to some distant city or province where his continued residence will not be bo dangerous to the government as it would be at St. Petersburg. Rlgl is stated to be the place selected. 1he Standard Oil Company has de clared a dividend of IS per cent, for the current year. From 1891 to 1895 this company paid twelve per cent a year. Its dividends Increased to forty-four per cent. In 1903, and they were thlrty-slx per cent, in 1904. The dlvl dend for tbe current quarter would in dicate a present earning equal to $60 on ever share of the stock, or a total of $60,000,000 on tbe capitalization of $100,000,000. t-..Cul MISERY TO HEALTH. A Prominent Club Woman, cf Kansas City, Writes to Thank Doan's Kid-, nsy Pillg for a Quick Cure Miss Nellie Davis, of 1216 Mlchi'gan ' Avenue. Kansas City, Mo., society, leader and club woman, writes: "I cannot Eay too ' maci-ln praise' of Doab's Kidney 7 " ; .;;.. . , ' J PUla. for they .. ..... -'t---J effected a com- . pleto cure In a ' . very short time . when I was suffering from kidney, troubles brought on by a cold. I Lad severe pains in the back and sick headaches, and felt miserable all over. A few boxes of Doan's' Kidney Pills made me a well w,oman, without an ' ache or pain, and I feel compelled to recommend this reliable remedy." . (Signed) Nellie Davis. A TRIAL . FREE Address Foster-., Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. For sale by all dealers. Price, 60 cents. The street railways of San Francisco have decided not to carry soiled' cloth ing. But who will inspect that worn, by the passengers? t 4- TEA Every woman knows how to brew tea her own way and she likes to have, her own way. . ' ' ' An Intelligent Dog. John Chase, a stage driver between . r. . A 11.. 1 1 T j 1 .t.A . Durtiiutt aim j-fiuuu, wyuuiiug, m iuo owner of a shepherd dog of more than . ordinary canine Intelligence. Recently " Chase was snowbound in the 'moun tains. His horses were down and night . was coming on. Not -inlnklng the .dog would understand, but being desperate, , Chase told tbe brute to. go back on the trail to' a miner's cabin and summon ' reached the cabin, scratched on the door and barked and attracted the in mates. The dog then ran out on' the", trail In the direction of his snowbound . master, and the miners were made to ' understand that something was wrong. They at once followed the dpg and as sisted Chase In getting out of the snow. ' Phnaa uniiM nnt fipll tha Hh? nt nnv ... .. u a ' -w price. '-,. Success Summed Up. , "What is the secret of .success?" asked the Sphinx. "Push," Bald the Button. jr, "Never be led," said the Pencil. "Take pains," said the Window. "Be up to date," saM the Calendar. - "Always keep cool," said the Ice. "Never lose your head," said the Bar rel. . -. Fire. "Do a 'driving business," said ? the ' Hammer. ; r "Aspire to greater things," Bald the Nutmeg. "Be sharp in all your dealings," said the Knife. "Find a good thing and stick to It," said the Glue. "Do the work your suited for, said the Chimney. Baltimore Sun. THE TRICKS.. Coffee Plays on Some. ' ' 11 hardly pays to laugh before yon are certain of facts, for It is some times humiliating to think of after- ' wards. "When I was a young girl I was a lover of coffee but was sick so much the doctor told me to quit and I did but after my marriage my husband begged me to drink it again i as; he . did not think it was the coffee caused the troubles. "So I commenced It again an,d con tinued about 6 months until my stom ach commenced acting bad and chok- . ing as If I had swallowed something ' ' the size of an egg. One doctor said it was neuralgia and Indigestion. "One day I took a drive with my husband three miles In the country ' and I drank a cup of coffee for dinner. I thought sure I would die before I e$ back to town to a doctor. I was drawl " double in the buggy and when my ' husband hitched tjie horse to get mo out into the doctor's office, misery came up In my throat and seemed to shut my breath oft entirely, then : left all in a flash and went to my heart The doctor pronounced It ner- . . vous heart trouble and when I got home I was so weak I could not sit np. . - ' .- "My husband brought my supper to't. my bedside with a nice cup of hot cofV; fee but I said: 'Take that back, dear,"'" I will never drink another cup of cof- fee If you gave me everything you are worth, for It is Just killing me- He and the others laughed at me and said: ' "The Idea of coffee killing any- . body.' "Well,' I said. 'It Is nothing else but coffee that Is doing if;' "In the grocery one day my hus-. band was persuaded to buy a box of Postum which he brought home and ; I made It for dinner and we both thought how-good It was but said nothing to the hired men and they " thought they had drunk coffee until laughed and told them. Well we . kept on with. Postum and it was not . long before tbe color came back to my cheeks and I got stout and felt" as good as I ever did In my life.' . I have no more stomach trouble and I know I owe it all to "Dostum In place of coffee. ' ' ' "My husband has gained good health on Postum, as well as baby and I. and -we all think nothing Is too good to say about it" Name given by FostuM Co, BatUe Creek, Mich.