Sierra County advocate. [volume], October 30, 1886, Image 1

About Sierra County advocate. [volume] (Kingston, N.M.) 1884-1960

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VOLUME IV.
HILLSBOROUGH, N. M., OCTOBER 30, 188(5.
NO. 30.
OCTOBER.
potohrrrnnipn nciof (he h 11
Like (inie I irhl irhost. she is no t II,
... Thntiuli hcrptiecl cheeks nrc rosv.
And thrmmli I In? I!nu : n tlui-ile ilowa
Her tnitlintr. liricr-oiiiMlcil rowu
lilcami' llkn a crimson po)-.
Th crickets in (ho at.iMile i lump;
Laiilerua tlssli (ml ill mlik nif tunc:
Thu ilnis ' loM her rilttlcs:
Th wnpt tiir lionet i d pippins irrt
A II I in i over lliu lilui pki,
A BH'I1 I hp r.vcr uiiiflic.
The trnlilcn-roil hides In the sun;
Q'llC lillci' ptlll.V VI' I 18 I'll II
Athwart ihr tlroopuitf m-i1xcii;
Tho nui ilnip soitlv 1 r m their burrs;
ho li rd-sui v I lie dint silence stirs
A bllnlil Ik on I ho hedges.
But tilled with fair ronti nt is she,
As if no Irost could ever lie,
'Ifidiin her Ih'oiyii oics' lutor;
And much Mie know of fmiy lolk
Thnl limine beneath till' spreiiduur onk
With tinkllDK mirth un.l bluster.
f ho listens when the dusky rvn
hti'D noftlt mi the lallcn leaves.
An If for nicHstie cheer nit:
Anil It mti't Pe that she eiin hear,
Ileynml f.ovemticr s-r in Hurt drenr.
The loet of ('br.Htniiis nenriuj?.
Susim hi Iku, in St. Nirholat.
WHY HE QUIT.
Ad Engineer Gives His Reason ior
Not Swearing.
"Strikes mo you select your adjec
tives willi uncommon neatness," said
the commercial traveler, eyeing tho
Stalwart engineer who stood regard
ing his locomotive with lovcr-liko at
tention. Several men stood near, but physio
nlly the linest specimen of them all
was the powerful fellow who was cast
ing shrewd glances along the different
part, of tho huge machine at tho same
time that ho answered intelligently
numerous questions put to him by the
commercial traveler. Tho man's speech
was crude, not entirely correct, but
utterly free from any thing like pro
fanity. To the remark just quoted be
Answered briefly:
'Hope I make myself understood,
stranger."
Oh, yes," said the traveler, an
nlert, itiick-spokeii man; "I only
not ice an absence of language more
emphatic than choice, that men of your
calling are usuully master hands at em
jilov ing."
"1 used to swear roundly enough
once, but I quit!" said the "engineer;
nml suddenly thrusting his linn chin
into the air, and folding his arms, he
drew up his eyes and ga.ed with a kind
of condensed look away oil", blit saw
nothing in particular.
The commercial traveler had dropped
ids bantering tone the next time bo
rpoke.
"That's a tine locomotive you have
charge of. 1 suppose you feci some
thing akin to affection for it."
"Fine!" said the engineer, coming
out of bis trance. Well, there she
rilands'and speaks for herself. Take a
look al her. .1 mind mo there, ain't a
mass o' machinery in the country kept
lirighler than that. Doesn't the boiler
shine most lit lo blind youP I tell you
she's perfect way through. There
Jiin't a spring nor valve, a rod nor
shaft nor nut, there ain't a boll, pipe
or slide, or box or any kind o' gear as
could be kept in better order than is
Jiers!"
Love her? Well. I .should say so.
It's been my hand as has bebl the
lever o'er her throttle valve for nigh
onto lifleen years, my own right hand.
And she's done my bitblin' like a will
in' child; aye, and once slit served
me well, and drove for herself when
it wasn't my hand as was o'er the
throttle valve. It were a stronger one
than mine that time, and she minded
my dumb wishes when I were helpless
to move, and could only cry out in bo
wildcred pain."
The group of men in various at
titudes, of which they were for the
moment unconscious, listened with
absorbed, interest to the fascinating
pcceh of the handsome giant, who
jtcpmrd merely addressing the com
mercial traveler.
You notice an absence of 'violent
adjectives,' yon call them in my
language. Well, when I get crazy
and don't have any sort o' control o'er
niv tongue, I may take the solemn namo
o' God in vain again, but 1 don't
much believe I ever shall beforo that
time.
'Vou sec" he thrust his chin out
again and drew up his tine eyes as
jf to look inward rather than outward,
though this time be fixed his pze on
the traveler's face "You see, I never
lad but one child, but that was enough
considering the kind; just as tine a lit
tle chap as ever drew the breath o' life.
"When he was five years old and began
his schoolin', he shot ahead o' the other
children in a way that surprised even
his mother and me. My wife kept
tellin' me all those days that I oughter
3 nit swearin". I never was one to
rink strong drink, but I know that
Til.ctj'it come tn rollin' out strons
oaths, there wasn't a man on the road
could beat tee. And the worst of it
vss I knew 'twas shameful wrong;
knew it from my mother's teachin s
hrn I were a boy.
Well, wife she kept on worrym',
but I kinder stubborn, even when
1 saw that dear child listenin' to my
ough words, and one mornin' wife
fvs in a kind o' discouraged way: 'I'm
'raid God will take venjreanec on you
aomc time or other, if you keep on
nsin' His name so free and delimit like":
and 1 couldn't a-Uild why to a-saved
ny life, but 1 kept thinking of wife's
remark, and wishiu' she hadn't made
it.
"Our boy w as about seven years old
then, and one murnin' about a couple
o' days after wife said what she did,
the little fellow come with me to see
the 'Race Queen' start olV as he often
did. Well, that niorniu' I bad her in
splendid rtinnin' order, as usual, and
Was all ready to stall when tho time
come, when I got into a discussion with
another cngieeer, a provoking, drink
ing fellow, who declared that his loco
motive could outrun tin- Knee Queen
any time. I was foolish enough to lot
the man drive tue into a furious pas
sion, and my language need only be
hinted al; that ilarliii' child standin'
by and listenin', too!
"After the man had moved on 1
heard a sweet, quiet v.oiee say: 'Oh
papa, what makes you talk so? It
makes me feel 'fraid'.
" 'Oh, you run home, Frankic,' says
I, for 1 Was scared on tho instant to
think of the adjectives' the child had
heard me use. It was time to start,
but just thi n one of the railroad 'bos
ses' come up and told me it had been
decided instead of my goin' my usual
route, to send me with the Kace Queen
some len miles up the road to pilot an
excursion train that was to take the
president and some o' the directors to
ti great nia-is-nieclin' o' railroad men.
I was not lo start for an hour.
At first I thought to go home awhile,
but I felt kinder backward to son my
wife, for 1 feared me the child might
a-tohl about my terrible talk in the
depot.
"Sharpen time I jumped aboard the
Race Queen, and oil', oil', she sped up
the smooth track, with every joint
oiled to make her glide like a streak o'
light, but at an hour when trains were
not expected to go bonndin' o'er that
portion o' the road. Hut on she tore,
no thought o' mishap in my mind, till
all at once 1 saw what near froze my
blood and nigh stopped the beatin' o'
my heart my own little son, with his
mimic 'express wagon,' was mounting
the bank to cross the track just ahead
o' me!
"You see, once in a w hile, stranger,
a person seems to live a whole life-time
in alioiif one-half minute, and at that
awful instant all my whole soul went
out in volumes of prayer to the mighty
name I'd taken so many times in vain.
Yet I only said two word (!od! (iod!'
For 1 knew not whattodo. Toslacken
speed on the inslant would be simply
impossible; should I push her suddenly
on, lo perhaps hasten my child's de
struction?" "I raised my hands In dumb entreaty,
and at the second I did so a great piece
front the falling branch of a tree shot
into the engine ami hit the lever, send
ing it violently "down a notch or two,
and Iho obedient, Kace Queen 'at the
sudden impetus bounded forward like,
a living thing! And 1 looked back and
saw my baby, with his little foot on the
long edged sleeper, ga.ing in surprise
at the locomotive which had raced by
him at that unexpected time."
The engineer gave a sudden gasp and
swallowed hard, bill, not a man on the
platlonn stiried a hair, am! pretty soon
lie went on:
"When 1 iippronchcd'thnt spot on
the return trip of course it was only
an excited fancy but all at once it
seemed as if I saw my boy just toiling
up the bank to the track, and again 1
threw up my hands and cried 'God!
(Iod!' Then I bowed my bead over
the lever, and took a solemn vow with
His help to quit swearing once and
forever!1'
The engineer gave a swift glance
along the motionless group of listen
ers, and added:
"I don't enjoy tellin' about, that aw
ful moment o' my life, but when 1 see
a company o' men who may possibly
think it a small thing to take tho holy
name o' (iod onto their lips in a heed
less way, no matter what young ears
may be listenin', 1 feel called upon as
a sort of penance to tell them what the.
Almighty can threalcH. Hut He's all
mercy, come to know Him, and it's
grievous sinful to take His dear name
in vain."
Willi Ihe last words the engineer
seized an oil can, gave a sharp spirt or
two amidst Ihe driving-wheels, and
springing to his place on the glittering
"Kace Queen," began ringing tho
bell. Mrs. Harriet A. Vliecvcr, in Inte
rior. m
A French musical journal says:
Different people sound different vowels
when laughing, from which fact a close
observer has drawn the following con
clusions: People' who laugh in A (pro
nounce ah) are frank, honest, and fond
of noise and excitement, though they
are often of a versatile and ticklo dis
position. Laughter in K (pronounce
ay) is peculiar to phlegmatic and mel
ancholy persons. Those who laugh in
I (jironounce ee) arechihlren orsimple
niinded, obliging, affectionate, timid
and undecided people. I'o laugh in O
indicates generosity aud daring. Avoid
all those who laugh in L as they are
misanthropists.
Herr T. Graul, a school teacher of
Ostrau, in Austria, receuily read iu the
papers an account of the famous Cre
mona violin owned by the artist Wil
hclmj, for which he is said to have re
fused eighteen thousand marks. Hav
ing a violin of his ow n which ho valued
highly, Herr (iraul examined it care
fully," and wa-s overjoyed to find that it
too bore the inscription, "Antonius
Stradivarius Crcmonepsis, 172A."
The difference between f.inio and
money is that one covers a man with
glory "and the oilier with good clothes.
Yt'iultinijtun Oifiw
L.
HINDOO WIDOWS.
Tli Truly Helpless Condition or The l a
fortiimit Women.
Tho formal period of mourning for a
widow in Kengal lasts for one month
with the Kayaslhs, the most numerous
and influential class in that part of In
diathe llrahmins keeping only ten
days. During this time shu has to pre
pare her own food, confining herself to
a single meal a day, which consists of
boiled coarse rice, simplest vegetables,
clarified butter, and milk. She can on
no account touch meat, fish, eggs, or
any delicacy at all; she is forbidden to
do' up her hair anil to put any scent or
oil on her body. She must put on the
saiiio colion sari day and night, even
when it is wet, and" must eschew the
pleasure of a bed and lie down on
bare ground, or perhaps on a coarse
blanket spread on it. In some cases
she can not even have her hair dried
in tho sun after her daily morning
ablution, which she must go through
before she can put a particle of food in
her mouth. The old women say that
the soul of a man after his death as
cends to Heaven quickly and pleasant
ly in proportion '.o the bodily inflictions
which bis wife can undergo in the
month after tho death of her husband.
Consequently tho new-made widow, if
not for any "other reason, at least for
the benefit of the sou! of her departed
husband, must submit to continuous
abstinence and excruciating self-inflictions.
A whole month passes In this
state of semi-slan ntioii. 'i'lm funeral
ceremonies which drag on till the end
of that period, are all performed, and
the rigid observances of Ihe w idow of a
litllu relaxed, if it may bo so termed,
since the only relaxation allowed to
her is that slio need not prepare the
food with her own hands, and that sho
can change hor clothes, but always
using only plain cotton saris. The
real misery of tho widow, however,
begins niter the first month. It is not
enough that she is quite heart-broken
for her deceased husband, and that she
undergoes all tho above-mentioned
bodily privations. She must also bear
the most galling indignities and the
most humiliating self-sacrilices. She
can not take an active part iu any
religious or social ceremony. If there
be a wedding in tho house the w idow
must not touch or in any way interfere
with the articles that aro used to keep
tho curious marriage customs. During
tho poojahs, or religious festivals, she
is but grudgingly allowed to approach
near the object "of veneration, and in
some bigoted families the contact of a
widow is supposed to pollute tho ma
terials requisite for the performance of
marriage ceremonies. The willow is,
in fact, looked upon a the "evil one"
of the house. If she has no son or
daughter to comfort her, or if sho has
to pass her whole life, as is often the
case, with her husband's family, her
condition truly becomes a helpless one.
During any ceremony or gr ind occa
sion slie has silently to look on, others
around her enjoying ami sporting
themselves, aud if some kind relation
does not como to relieve her tedium
she has baldly any thing to do but lo
ruminate on her present sad, wretchod
condition. Every female member of a
family, whether married or unmarried,
can go to parties, but a widow can not,
and if she expresses any w ish to join
the family on such occasions it is in
stantly repressed by the curt rebuke of
her molhci'-iu law or some other rela
tion that "she is a widow and she must
not have such wishes." Duninlra X.
Ihis, in nineteenth Cenlurt.
m .
GERMAN SOLDIERS.
Itetlrement of the Vctmkna of KonlKgrntr.,
Neiliin wml I'Hrl.i.
German newspapers are drawing at
tention to tho interesting fact that the
present year, marks the outset of
a new era in which the men who fought
ill the great wars of lH(i(i and 187(1 will
have entirely retired from service.
Hereafter the conscripts who are an
nually levied to renew the active army
will be men who were not born when
tho last of many quarrels between
Auslria and Prussia ripened toward
the final settlement nt Sadowa. These
coming recruits were but children four
years obi when the leaguers of Melz
and Paris were begun, ami they can
have no recollections of the suspense,
the trials and the triumphs of that
period. Nor, with the exception of
some officers, is there any one now left
in the active ami v or even in the Lnnd
wohr, or reserve, who can recount as
an eye-witness the soul-stirring cam
paigns of Hohemia or France, and per
petuate in his young comrades the
passions which formerly inflamed the
Prussian soldier against his Austrian
and Bavarian compatriot as well as
against his traditional French enemy.
Only in the Landsturm, or home guard,
linger some veterans of the Seven
Weeks' war, and the grass has long
been green over tho graves of their
brethren who perished in fratricidal
conflict at Koniggratz and Kissingen.
Of the soldiers who will henceforth be
called upon to light for the German
tnipiro in any probable contingency,
not one can recollect a time when
North German and South German
were not brothers in arms, nor would
any of the new generation look with
the old fear and rancor on their neigh
bors across tho Rhine if Frenchmen
upon their part would but cease talk
ing of revenge. iV. J". Hun.
' m
A little girl of six to one of her
companions "How old is your grand
ma that you are always talking about?"
"Ninety years." "Oh! How big sli
must be,"" 'rtnej l'vjer,
RULES FOR BARBERS.
lluiv Tousorlii! ArllKlH Cn Make Tlm
nelve. Aj-rt'eilhle to tlirlr t'liNtoillrr..
I. "First catch your hair."
II. Place him iu the ( hair aul man
ipulate the tiller wheel until he is
screwed down into a position at once
uncomfortalilo and barbarous.
III. Kcmnrk about Ihe weather. In
observing Ibis rule it is well likewise
to have observed the meteorological
conditions, if ll is blowing at thorutu
of one hundred and sixty miles an hour,
call your patient's allenf.ioii to the fact
lhat'it is "windy to-day." This puis
tho pal'u nt at his ease at once, aud dis
plays a friendly intent on your part,
which may be elticaeious in extracting
a "for drink," as the Frenchmen have
it, tit the close of the seance.
IV. If the patient wants a shave,
lather him.
V. Having lathered Ihe subject, rush
to Ihe hydrant and wash your bauds.
VI. Lather the patient again.
VII. Seize your razor uul sharpen it.
VIII. Huh patient's jaw for live min
utes. This sends the soap inside tho
pores and produces a In nqiiility of the
llesh I hat even tv line tooth razor can
not disturb.
IX. More lather.
X. If the patient's pores are not
thoroughly stuccoed wild soup by this
lime, reaii your morning paper until
the required sluecodity i.i attained.
XI. Seize your razor once more aud
llourUh it three limes on Ihe strop,
and then inquire if the patient is par
ticularly tender in any particular spot,
XII. ' If he is, scrape that spot until
the subject shows signs of dissolution,
then soothe him w'nh lather.
XII I. Scrape both jaws with the
razor, and if musically inclined whistle
in Ihe patient's ear'during the cere
mony. X(V. After lie is entirely flayed
ask if the razor burls.
XV. If be says yes. continue Iho
pro. ess until he swears that it does not
hurt.
XVI. Inform patient that a little
shampoo might not hurt him.
XVII. Soak bis face with bay rum,
pulling an especially large quantity on
all raw spots.
XVIII. Comb patient's hair on
wrong side, scrape magnesia over his
blade lie. let a drop of lather fall on
his bonis, hand him his hat, give him
the address of a convenient undertaker,
and
XIX. Yell "Nkxt!" y.(7.
A DUCK STORY.
A YV.Vmlilu Hunter llltirovern Ilnf
Citveril Which foittillil Three I.HkeM.
A singular story comes from the
head of Panther creek, a stream of
Northeastern Colorado, with its course
not many miles from the Nebraska
line. One of the sources of the creek
is a shallow, sedgy pond, from which
the water pours overa miniature preci
pice sonic len feet in height ami live or
six in w idth.
The pond is the resort, ill their sea
son, of a great many wild ducks, who
feed on the sedgy plants growing on.
its margins and its shallow bottom
Last year a neighboring ranchman no
tiecd that on disturbing these water
fowl, iu place of ll,ing (o a distance.
llu'V circled about a few niomeiTts and
I hen dashed through the veil of water
formed by Iho falls coming from tin!
pond.
Though a good deal astonished the
ranc hman had I hen no time for in
vestigation of the singular cireuin
slanse, and not until a short time ago
did be follow the tracks of the ducks
through the falling waters. Ileyond
a slight ducking he experienced
no inconvenience in passing be
hind the falls. Untie there and
the way was clear. Opening before
him w as a passage three feet in width,
and of Kiillieienl height to allow a man
to pass upright. The wallsof the subter
ranean way were dripping with walcr,
ami undoubtedly passed benealh Iho
pond. He had not gone many yards
before the sound of a great qiineking
fell upon his ears. Hastening his pace
he soon camo upon u large cavern, in
Ihe center of which was a lake. The
surface of this lake 'as thick with
ducks. The walcr fowl were mostly
mallard and leal, Ihouj li several other
varieties were represented.
On the nppronch of Ihe intruder tho
ducks arose in an immense cloud and
disappeared through an opening be
yond the lake. Our adwnluror fol
lowed them and found another and
similar lake covered with wild ducks.
Again the fowl arose, aud wilh fright
ened and clamorous quacks thronged
through anolher passage-way. Hero
tho pursuer found the largest lake of
all and the end of the subterranean
water chain. The ducks now took tho
back track, and he could hear the rush
of their wings and tho sound of their
harsh notes growing fainter as they
fought the safety of the outer air.
Cheyenne (Wyo. 'J'.) Lctaler.
Iu the rotunda of the Richmond
(Va.) capitol the.ra is an old stove
made of iron w hich is said to be one of
the oldest stoves in existence. It was
made a present to the colony nf Vir
ginia in 1770, and was opoken of at that
time as a warming-machine. It is
seven feet high, anil has as much orna
RiiUitatiou as a Queen Anne house.
A write! in Ijiiigmrm's Majnxint
represents the puma r South Anieri-
eilll liml tit lieillli- ulu.tu t rii .till 1 V til
man, mi much so (hat I never resists j
an altack made bv a human enemy,
though it exhibits the ytcatest ferooijj j
' 1
PERSONAL AND IMPERSONAL.
- Senator Mitchell, of Vermont,
lately became a father and a grand
father in the same day.
A rich New York woman with
humorously tender heart is to establish
"an asylum for injured polo players."
Francis A. Walker, chief of the
census of IHHO, estimates that the pop
ulation of the I'uileil Slates iu 1'JOO
w ill not fall short of eighty million.
The farm of Valentine Frost, at
Locust Valley, L. I., has been in pos
session of the family since llitM). F.ight
generations have had their birth iu this
ancestral home.
Moses Sterns is a Philadelphia
philanthropist who is trying to organ
ize the servant girls of the country so
that they may obtain the right to do
their courting in tho parlor. t'hilmlcl'
thia JYcss.
The prize of a gold-headed cane
for the winner of a fat man's race in
Pittsburgh was carried off by a butcher
who lips the beam at three hundred
and lifly pounds. None were permit
ted to start in the race carrying less
than two hundred and live pounds.
John Allison, of St. John's Run,
Md , while a passenger on a Italtimom
& Ohio train, lost his lull. Ho at ouco
jumped oil' for it, landed against a pilo
of iron, and crushed his leg so that It
had to be amputated. He did not n
cover his hat. JltiHimore Amerienn.
Tho once famous singer, Adelina
Speech, for whom Adelina l'alti wae
named, died recently in Koine. Slw
was in her tiny considered the rival ol
Malibran, but'her extraordinary corpu
lency compelled her to withdraw froir
the stage at the age of twenly-fotir.
IhictKjn Journal.
- One of tho rich men of Glasgow il
Thomas Luplon, an American, whe
went there poor, started a meat mar
kct, made a specially of hams, and by
shrewd and thoroughly Yankee meth
ods of advertising has made much
money. One of his advertising dodge
was the driving through the Glasgow
streets hogs clothed in canvas, on
which was painted, "Tom Lupton's In
fnnts." A'. Y. Hun.
How many musical people, who
think themselves well-posted in the
records of the art, will feel any interest
in hearing that John Templeton is
dead? Yet Templeton was a groat
man in his day a niagniliecrit singer,
with a splendid tenor, the associate of
Malibran, the rival of Itraham, and an
artist of Ihe tirst rank in every way.
All musical dictiomtrins refer to him
suitably. Ho was eighty-three years
old. A'. 1". Independent.
Mr. F.lbridgo T. Gerry, president
of the Society for the Prevention of
Cruelly to Children, iu New York, is a
philanthropist, capitalist, lawyer and
yachtsman. He visits the headquarters
of the institution twice daily, staying
two or three hours each time. Some
times of a winter morning the clerks
are surprised by seeing him enter as
early as eight o'clock. He rcoclvcd
live hundred thonsand rloliars from hU
uncle, the late PelexA(ioelct, and will
inherit perhaps several times that sum
from his mother, who is Peter Godot's
Mslcr. He serves Ihe society without
Hilary, both as president and counsel.
A'.'P. Mail.
'A LITTLE NONSENSE."
A magazine writer discourses on
Iho "music of the grasshopper.". Won
der what he would call tiling a saw?
Noi'risotrn Herald.
Lightning recently passed between
a mule and n lawyer in Texas, and
killed the lawyer. Kven lightning
seems to know it thing or two about
the mule. AVm Haven Sews.
-Guest --"Waiter, did you say this
was genuine turtle soup?" "Yes, sir;
it was made out of the water of a pond
near here in which a turtle was kept
last summer." A'. 1'. Teleiram.
"What aro you doing there, vou
rascal?" "Merely taking cold, sir."
"It looks to me as if you were stealing
Ice." "Well, yes perhaps it will bear
that construction." I'rmrie Fanner.
The foreman's trouble
Tlie foreman's wear) tina wr nklod fsee
i nrs s look thiit s sad nml solemn,
When he looks m nil nils Hull lie tins to place
square up st the lop of one column.
Mcrehant Traveler.
"Audi! That horrid man stepped
on my big toe." "My dfar young
lady, "that is impossible. How csn a
por.sou having Midi a beautiful little
foot as you possess a big toe?" Merlin
Time.
"Whoy aro you when you go to
the theayter like a spud full o' cyesP"
"'Cos I ain't, ye fule." "Hegorra you
are you are a sprckt later." "Ye
blalherin' hijjut. You ain't a spectator
at all, at all you're a order-torium."
-'boston Bulletin.
Judge Jeffreys, taking a dislike to
a man who had a long beard, told him
"that if his conscience was as long as
h's Ward, he had a swinging one."
'My lord, if you measure conscience
by beards, vou will have none at all."
All'tiny Journal.
The story conies from Koston of a
dude who, having Wen asked to ssy
graoe at a formal spread at which be
took a leading part, bowed his head
slightly, languidly lowered his eyelids,
and murmured, "Oh, Lord, thanks
awfully!" A'. )'. Hun.
Host (in ngony about bis polished
inlaid floor) Hadn't vou better come
in on the carpet, old fellow? I'm
afraid you will slip, you know. Guesl
(with a wooden leg) -Oh, It's al'
right, old fellow, thanks. Thcio'i ."
6iul iu the cud, you know I '
OF GENERAL INTEREST.
Turrets are coming In as fashiona
ble pels. A'. 1'. Mail.
Three boys ranging in ago from
eleven to fourteen years aro serving a
term or two years eacn in tnot aiiiorum
penitentiary for burglary at San Jose.
It is said that a "mule can not
bray If a brick be tied to his tail."
The liurlington Free 1'ren.t raises tho
question, "What becomes of the fellow
who adjusts the brick P"
".Mix Chicago wilh Pittsburgh and
Bait tho whole w ith smoky sandstone,"
writes Carp, "and you have tho great
Scolch cily of Glasgow. H is larger
than Chicago, and better built than
cither Chicago or Pittsburgh.
A good many of the colored people
are satisfied that" if the artesian wells
had not been bored there would have
been no earthquake. They are just as
well satisfied with their theory as many
of the scientists are wilh theirs. S'tt
vantmh AVir.
The Grand Armvof California eon-
tains representatives from every Massa
chusetts regiment and organization
that served iu the war except the tciitn,
tifly-fourth and tifly-liflh infantry, tno
Iwo latter being cololod regiments.-
tian Franeixeo 'nil.
The deepest sea-sounding yet ef
fected w as made oil' the coast of New
Guinea wilh a four hundred weight
lead sent down from tho Knglish ship
Challenger, which struck bottom nt
the enormous depth of twenty-six thou
sand seven hundred feet.
I'.ggs transported a long distnneo
in railway cars aro said to become in
llamctl to such an extent as to be un
safe as an article of food. Probably if
packed in such a way as to secure
Ihem against jolting this result might
bo prevented. lioslon tilvbe.
At a restaurant in Tucson during
the late heavy washout, when no train
had arrived fiir several days and there
were no potatoes in tho 'market, the
bill of faro was printed, "Potatoes en
route," aud another read, "Potatoes iu
box car." San Franeineo Clironiele.
Reports of a peculiar ease of blood
poisoning come from Culiaean, Mex.
Some time ago a lady was pecked on
her arm by a hen, and shortly after she
began to" feel a pricking sensation
about the spot. Then her arm became
inflamed aud swelled rapidly, and the
next day she died, the physicians lin
ing ignorant of any means of affording
her relief.
A convict in tho jail at Athens,
(in., stripped the iron hoops from his
cell tub, made them into saw blades,
sawed through an iron bar an inch
square, making a hole in the window
fourteen inches square, soaped his
naked body and thus slipped through
it. and was then delected by thesherill'.
He said that ho had to get out of his
dark cell.
Mr. Horace Andrews, an American
gentleman now in Loudon, bus written
to a friend in Koston Unit he has
learned that there is in possession of
a French family, near Paris, a portrait
(life-size bus! )'of Franklin, by tho fa
mous portrait painter, Greuzo. It was
purchased from a royal palace during
the French revolution in IMW, Mr. An
drews says. He suggests that, though
it would cost a large sum, it ought to
ho procured for some public building
iu Koston. Ilon'on Journal.
"Wluil bolher.! society ladies morn
than any thing else is to keep up wilh
the f isliions in walking," sas tho
Allanla Con.itiluliun. "Onn season a
lady will be cxpeclcd lo adopt a win
ning gait. At anolher time swinging
strides will bo the style. Tho slow
walk and the rapid pace alternate in
popularity. Nothing lasts long. If
fashion decrees that a woman must
make herself a perambulating convul
sion of millinery anil dry goods, it is
all right. The stylo must have its
rim."
There is a village just oulside of
New Haven that knocks Knoch Ardeu
out. Tho soprano of the church choir
is a good-looking young woman of
thirty summers. Tier second husband
plays the organ, ami No. 1, who was
divorced, works the organ pump for
the good of the church. And Ihe mus
ical couplet of husbands are good
friends. The divorco law has been got
down to such a line point in Connecti
cut that it isn't any longer considered
good form for the principals to get out
of humor with ono another. Ar. Y.
Timet.
Among the old papers in I'm coun
ty clerk's oiVice at Freehold, N. J., is
the death sentence of a negro named
Caesar It reads: Therefore tho collet
doth judge that thou, the said Cjcsar,
sl'-H return to tho place from whence
thT?i earnest, and from thence to Iho
place of execution, when thy right
hand shall lie cut oh" anl burned be
fore thine eves. Then thou shalt lis
hanged by the neck till thou art dead,
dead, dea'd: then thy body shall lie cut
down and burned to ashes in a tire,
and so Ihe Lord hnve meicy on thy
soul, C.Tsar." A'. Y. Tribune.
A Contemptible Cook.
Proprietor of Hotel Yon call your
ielf A French cook! A fine specimen of
a French cook you are. Consider your
self discharged.
Cook Kut, sure, vol haf I done?
Proprietor Where are those chic We
croquettes were lo have for dinn'-r?
Cook Sure, r.ere ins no chickens?
Proprietor Whosai,'! any thin? about
chickens? Make them of codlbh, tho
same as our last, cook did. ihicijo
Itambkr. i