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"i.1ii'' ALL A RE BORROWERS r.'.lir.. CUM3ACK TELLO OF H ADITS Or NEiGHBORS. ' ! v .. . ' i v y QQgf Jokes 1 VACATiON. FLATiZJ OR OTHERWISE. i, nwi i n o I'M nit TV I I r, i v, 1 JURIST ON THE RACE TRACK Kxohllliulu; a nring of cms purses owner. v. J.: i .:; I U'.iO hoar tin' shout... i.f i!i. , ii r4 as the alii--ia) Ii'' -'fInK perhaps noses out n hc-i, under t lu In-. I,, ,,;,. pali ist WHS IllWHVB 3 lli'Vuli'li n II,.. iiO i;-,ir',; I.. has always iwnul ii Hiri'is "i him . ...... 1.... n . .1 . M-ltll il.t' I-' si '!H' l'rom'lS Ol IMS uli.-ii- la- .i- nern, in in., win ii'iiiiui'-n in i.n- i:.r in in- n,;,ii- up ins inili-l !)';. la- wn'ilil KOiiir- day wi-ur I In ! .f , ,r , . inn, IN- hnO that ocu in liani-a- ii. l:, trnfiiK throuisli with nj aln ruar-i- lni'viiiR to Olilalionia. J mm.).' i - n 1 1 oriiu uiivB in uKi.iriuiiin i in- ini'tai jni -s iia-n--l ny til" jironi'li !i r- a mo me 'iiHirui j.inu. inn ihfirii'l i i ili-'S, t.'ie Bi'vnn oi i:i iiiu-.l tic !'i i' '' ni'ni-h of lht I . ct ml.' " 1' ! nil Jmlfto. bill Ills" J'l - la ii l-.-iari' i - :ii Alva nml a tnoii,b-r l;lil- f if li'i'i ia"' Justlpo. I'.nici a.-1 was ai'I'Olllti'il In l!i-i: 'iv tin- mini- ! i'1-slilmit. Hi'lni; a j'lO .; ii';,- r, -ailz"-! I'aliona.-t 010 not foryt n,,, ii.in'j. .ii vai-atinii. his l-asiinn-, 'iniij ;,!-i. 1 ila- cotllt A PICTUnESGUE PITTS BUFiGER ( nil the 1 within two 0:i:- a chic;. on hoii'-o, L'-m feet long foil wile, was well under way. The f niin co.-l $;, i, mi l ihe boil- nl o n -tenth that sum. It has In on ru-ln -0 to r.mj0.'tii n It l.a. in,, I !:1HJ Kte.-i le si ' !- etric lights, tile flooring riciivi .1 ii,,. liisi of pis very expensive but suporlai: . oly fr-.-.-h ec'C recen'ly I'' a. oi l, ':. in,- story rends like an orient a! roi-ian.,-. lie was a clerk at the li'ii-n i ,i:n'. i- of a l'ittsbui'K ilry liood store len in tin eourii' of his .lu- tli-s I.-.- le o,-ii;:- ao-nialntod with Mr. Carm-nlc T!o- p-onin.n-l. r took a liking ta t!i- nini- s- i.'ch hid. aided liim In various ways, mi. I his career thence- forth w.n. in. i.oric. leu-nil ni.iri-ied n Oaimbler of a I'.ronkiyn police cat tain, ininn 1 n- I'll Tli cy 1i:i., i;e-,,. children---two boys ami a slrl. tin- oiile.-I of win m is iwciily ciia' ami i';e Miinm.-st ten. CIRCLES GLOBE IN AM AUTO Mrs. holds the . .. tbrouuli li Itoiiio, Naples ami port mm i, ' imi.s -'inp n oin t!l(-ro tn I;, !;- Mrs nuhrau letteru ro'i -i-in ..' to 111 'ir ova, I n- ; M-e i:il, I- f Hil,, !-, I .'. '" 1!-e rely net with several cscepi lo-iallv .xrilinu evs-i'l.-noi-s p., -it ern near s, ;i li.-e. t back. After InmPii", In San Kr:nu-i-.i aid i-hii n.r - . K'i'"''s !..r on,-, eouiiiry, Mrs. Fisher's trip uas uiievei.Hiil . r. lor h, r ,:i r--t I" M.i. hi; ky, )., fur exee'e-dltiK the si e. -1 limit. i AN ENGLISH ent, the poor man or yomu uo inm j ' trllll,.- o'T-nse-ls bundled off to Jail if ho cannot immediately hand over the r-'Cuiilary ntonenient for Ills liilsdetiieauor which blind Jut-tiro demands of hli- (m tho other hanJ, tho ofleinlor with a well-lined pnckei, to whom tho MiMaont of tho iino is no hardship, cscaprs the Isiiioiiiiny of Inipnsonmeiit 1U'K' thor. ''-. Mr. Holmeg seems to bn within mcapur.ib'c distance or f-citm-r his M rcforin 11.lo1.teO by leKal ennctment. A few days ago, on h-half of the Jluwurd association, ho obtained nn oinclal Interview with Winston Churchill, t,' lioiiie secretary, whose Bpeclul business It Is to look after tho ndmliilstra 'i t justice, and Mr. ChurcliIU siuco then has annouueed his intention ol "'Juii.iraliug this reform. i' i.n iii.. I. , ,i i i, ... 111.' i.ll Oklahoma T. ri iii ry f, ,,,,( milkey l.c!ln I let n,-,,; i,. . ,,, ,, .,, H anO nilhm pb.c :- in a ,vi-(! t.,rv in ,cr John L. Pan.-i asl. now n r.-,i..:.t ..f i !!:, w.-ll ioi'tti m oniii'ion..!. I .m I- : n K ,p,, c )k l.tt-.r .. inn Kansas radm; enouit ; ,.,.., I ... nia, .,V1. li r I'n ir , ;:!;!:. town niiiii'T-muie-wearer ihe Invr of I.. : (. I,, ,., ,,nlv rPnf.,n 1 why .1. ..!;,. P.nieeis! hie , . ,.., , i,-,,,,, bench , Milkey. Ill Is still a , ',:! i-lli" illiriiry nlld Is' admitted Id pinclis'- I. -!''.!- Hi ,' I'm;;, ! Slates S.i ! prenio court. Lin lie protot-s in ,. ,. i,. s . coming down tin- l,f iii i- nr. teh in a whir! nf dust ....I.... l.i. I 1. . , , ..... '." "" '' '!.: t- ''i'M IMUSI'S. I I I'llliV ill-. HHf, 111 Dlllll, - i - nnlin'. I ins lai-l I,.- i-i. anfastiy ins Ijnanct w'-i-n In- lm-ai'-l ill wcsimn Urn usual i-. rnniv i, a yi-uiiK luwyi r s in iin- ii-;-'inrv uti.l in iiiKIIUnn to no- - .:i inuin in-.-l'ii-r at Hi-- ca;-n::l cnnst. - rrltury. Thus .' i 1. I'in,c. - t l.-'-aiii" li - 'i' :-f tin- K -v.ii'li (Hilal.iiii: MMrict with ol the t rritorial -ui -n in-- l.' -n- li ltli I'Y IT- sl.li-nt ll.iri.-Mii an I a.nin In 1?;.C I i n I In- In in h, w ,t ', !:i i ,,:,.liii imi in i Lis linrii-s. I: wan Im mi.- f-Mi-f rruni j IiIh la l. ii,. i . rv,-l us ju.jj,. mnii siai-v ! The lnn.-t i-i.-iiir.-Mja.- iiillii-ai.-ii'-- In burn nml ine of Ili nmsl l-izan-i- in tin- nniniry Is Ali-Min-1. r I!. I'. iicni li. wlm r'-'-'iiily cani-- hid public nntii-n on account of a ba-l c I!i ' an i he cot on" for hp-ill, fast In- sn-'iit in arly $7n," ' to start a 1 ' nm ry with w lilob to nippiy his i i , " wllh ices In ill from the in-.t II.- l.i's ih,. r, imi tation of licin-,' the most irii, cih'.- in,! i-, iilnal in l'ittelmi'U. What happ. m-O to I. Is l:--f w!.. n Yr. Peacock ta.-ti-'l the cnhl siori.'.- . a:- thai in--. trouble n av he I niii.in. il. Al'- r ho lia l Oe n av . I niii. iii. il. .ft.-r ho lia l relieved hh. feelings he called up a r a! . la!o dialer. "I want a farm." In- vail, "n farm that Is hi:; rnoiich to raise a lot of chickens" Ilefore iiluht the r. al male man had the farm; and il- cir.o 1 in Horn, .mi. 1'oacocK Harriet Clark Kisher of Trenton, N. iini-iii" record of b. im: the inly v.-imnn who has "ir ll. d the arlh In all an'omobil.-. Mrii. Kl.-I:er's trip hi In r -o hoi-- now or machine inalo-s new hisloiy in the uuionioliiie -rl I. an-1 par'.n-; larly In the I'ealtn of women. Willi her on the trip were li r s er.-lary, Hiiro!.! Fii;!n-r llrook:--, who dniM': a man ami i iaid M-r:iiir. ami llonli HonU. ln-r pel hull t.rrlir, who Mas taken alom: as a mtiK-oi In milli on, the car. whnli was cspeclally lmi:t for the ul v carrie, a complete htock of tires, p-irts and one', in-,- u'- nslls. The pan- lamb d n 1-' -m .-. loi.r.-.l l-'isurely : il.i-nee il.r . i-;h li.-r-i'n .0 !-'-., Uxor- land; rinsfed t i lal.'. w ..ere a l-ii.-i stay was Hindu at I'niiin. '!'h- :,oe t'-ey vi-io i N'ionna FRISOH EXPERT At the invilatioti of Ihe Pnit. d St-n s :-,i. mrtit Thomas Holmes 1 nines from linrinnd to at tend the Intermit limiil Prlion coni'-ri m-e. Mr. Holines Is tho secretary of the Ho.varO csso-ia-tlon In London, which Is devoted to the double work of refornilna prison nd.niiilstrai i-m lie in admittedly tho foremost of practical KiiKln-h crlniinolop.ists. lie has nuele a lilelons study of criminals. Ilefore he became the ia-retary of tho Howard association liu was for many years a court missionary. For a Ions time Mr. llolnvs lias boon advo c.itlnn the HfOit of off. nd"i's to pay their lines by installments and thus, In n measure, oniinllzlng tho glnriiiK disparity in treatment which the law makes between the rich nn.l the poor. At pres " 11 'I" r. 't nnil I i- l.ilil Ii. r. clnra ""'i' ' I'" VII IllMi.-r " i II. ".' ' ' .miitt i-l, i I,, ,1,1 r rl,,,, 1 ' 'i-'1' nil . l. rnily "' lil irl In- miinl.-il up 1 1 " I'lvi s!i" I H.I l-l On. I, 'ii'i ir'. il up - . I- l , II. n.tV i-l. wi!i ...i.-i, ,i l-lc. ' n i;-l i v ,,,!, ,.,.s ,sy '"" nt I , ..!.. -.I': - .Mi.,-., s .-, nv A"'' 1 ' '.! tl..; Is a- I ii'llrl ri); ! -nil w'n n liil'ilm; (.' i . , i . i I y " " -.". i- ...,., w..,l,., ' ' r" ''' ii'l. In-- .nil ni.ililni: rn-lior ' ,"" ''-t l-u w.m lis t.ntir.' a- hih.isIht) 1 .i I -I ilni'i,! t'a. Just Guessed It. "Tli-y n.-iv sin. is nlili- tu trim linr own liuis mi t'.ai cm u Mdia. -i nr un til .li-iiicr Unit tiny haul nnt ; U" n fixed up l.y th,. nilllin-rn." i "it Ulllli! I an, itu tliut k1, la BO "Wl.n fid,) j-,),,. h'lincly?" "N'lilnnly; but n wdiuini who could fnvo lAjH-nsi-s by trlnnnini; In-r fiwn ball wiiu',. ii.'vit be pi-nnlltiO to r- mum Hhk if slia u-i-ru not nalufullv plain 'Ai.iK. on bavo kuossimI It." A LICHTWEICHT. mr ; i'r-t Wall, r. -1 li-ln'l thai thin c)ia i you as wulHn' on tin your I Second Wnher Tip ne! Bay. ; (h-oi., that bloke's so -larn moan jlliat if In- weighed hiniself I don't bo , j,.vu ,,. , tj,, tj;l. fcra!i s. j i i Never Touched Him. ne.l,! - U'ln-.t was lhat man tallilru ,, . ... ...,i.lv . i.,.n vou wero la j,ir .,tm,.i,ni.? ; (;r, , m- oh, he was a book riRor.t. - - j . j . ,s talk have any f.'eet on j y,,u'" (,;, . ,,jn-, v0 , nollm 1 had tho , wluO i-bi.-i-t up .'"- Vonl-.ers States- man. Mahlng Hf-r Ufi'ful. "He love.-' me. lie lows inn not," mnnn'iro.l tlu roinan'..n suiiimer boarder. I "Vou muff hive picked a ihouRiind ilal.-lea to pl.c.s te-lay," remarked ! H,,. old t iron r P.issii.ly 1 have." 'Colli, la l : '- piny that B'nne Just as well Willi pi I -i in lulls '.'" H Hoped So. A i .o'h'-i' ' ' a i-'reat many uniall rtiildren ',! toil "li s!iowi.-: the new- I , en b.-nv I re:-!ly ma m,. ,;-i I usn.il !; evi-ryono who called mid a hor - of In rsi-lf. p. r jiioior railed mid as ,11: "(Hi, Iiiictnr lilank, i hav.' on n n my last baby?" ,,r mi,.! am, I hop.! so," ha ill s National Monthly. mnl Taking a SMns to Us. Fi.iini .,.:.!. 1 tell yon '.lit,' Is a hot :.ii,,,i -o',- ,iot werkiio.; ili'-e dnvs s'o o"! I - i-..t , y.;eni Bre you talk-I::.- ,! I'lllilil. Ill - I he ilar sy-tem. I CNLY a vi ; '- rf ', ---' Ii I.ittlu Tommy (nse. five. In thu art pullery polnllni; to statuo of Venus) Uh. mamma! There's a woman with out tiny arms. "Mamma --Yes, dear; she was an an clout Biiddess. Little rommy- Why, mamma, I didn't know that they had automo biles in thoso days. V.'AY TO ACCOUNT FOR IT. t-VpV 1 " , 'ii1,. ' ' 1 S2 Thorn vim n Kinnll crowO at tho Fo.la cininler when the tall lima rusln .1 In nml puslie.l an einpiy bottlo over the .Irni! scales. "Aclil!" I,.. lil;,iereil, rxclte.liv. "Ton cuts' worth of ucIO, ami ipilrk!" I The so.la-wali-r crowO bi-Kiiu to Bit I up nii.l iiil.o notice. j "W'nnl'R he Koine to lo with that act. I ?" .b iiiainli .1 one. "It's u n-cn;," aiiiiwcrcd fio drus rl.-i-k. "No'lilr.ir him sun!, I hope?" "Well, riilln-r." "What! You mean to ray ho Is gt Ins to take that achl?" i "nil, nn. I.lsl.-n. There Is sliver I we.l.in at bis h -use tonight nml ha In piilliK to ti'i-t the presents us fxst i as his frli-inls hrliii? them." I AnO then a:ul there tln-y vote.! Mm the meanest man lu town. Giving nn Instance. "to oi (!." s.inl the ciistonier, "you j make n prctly kouO tliiiiK ol It In tip In the course of a year, don't you?" j "Yes, tlr," answered the barber. "I ' Ju fairly well, Mr. J'ark'T, fairly well." , "How do you iiialiaKS It?" "Oh, I Just .tolly the dwells iilonR, I you know. I hi. nil 't-iu out a llttlu j taffy iiow an' then." "I see. I'.y thu way, (leorge, now I that 1 think of It, haven't you mjiiiii- ; ihliiK that will make the hair trow on , that bahl ij;ot ot mine?" j "lllcss you, Mr. Parker, that nln't no j hahl spot. The hair Is Just a Ultlo bin there, t-lr; that's ull. . . . Thiiulc ; oa, .Mr. Parker." i As Rtprescnted. "Ixick here!" mlioutc-d the purchaser of the llule store In excited tonej. "I Diieht to Iiave you arreoti 0 for swln dliiiii." "What's the trouhle now?" queried l!iu faker, lmaicentiy. "Why, you told mo when I bought that store that business was running like clockwork." "Yes?" "W ell, after clpht cays had elapsed I ' u;'0 to wind up tin linsiness." "Well, Isn't that what you'd have to j do lib clockwork? Count on and have ju t'luar mid thi-u lot nm sell you a pat- 1 1,11 ehurii Unit turns out butter at two ceuls a pound." KNEW A STORM WAS BREWING. -r ffj p-imw Mrs. Wl.-e- -If you are poliiR to the Indue toiihiht you had better take' your ov reoat. Mr. Wise Are yn.i poliiR to sit up and wall for inn until I comu homo? Mis. Wise- Certainly. Mr. W'h.c Tlu-u I'll tuku my storm- I'Ullt. Pcevlbh. "Shave, sir?" impiiied th phy1 egnoiiiiriil loiisorial artist of tho man with threo days' prowih of whisker. "Of course not!" snapped tiiu man In tliu e-huir. "Priny mo a eliarlulta A Diagnosis. V- 11 HIV v .ll tl-ni't .-i im.. a c.-P ; 1 ' 1 I p t y- ur li v. N, ii j.,11. Take No Chances. Mm. X.- -TI1.) tint ahave us Is unoc cupied rinht now - v. by don't you come and Uvo there? Mm. Y. O, my dear! Wo'vn been such cooil friends, and I hato to ttart 1 (juurrt'ling with you! I When Meat Is High. ( "What do you call tills'.'" demanded the train pulrou tu tho rush lunch- room. I "Uat, sah, nm a hnmhurg steak." ra ' Eponded tho polltu waiter. "llamburn st.-ak? H'h! From tho slzo of it I should say it was u hum but; eteak." From Pittsburg, Too. Kitty Plies And ihut Pittsburg millionaire has been spending money Ilka a Mldus. Tho old lobster! Belle Wings He's not a lobster, Kit. He's a full lledeed gold flsbi that's what ho Is. No Jeweler. Johnson That girl Is a Jewel. Morrison Why don't jou marry her? Johnson I en n't furnish, the set ting. Smart Set 'B 1 Tr.-i.is ot;d Trihulations of One Who Trica to Be Acconinioci.-.t.ng Loaned Dcg Cot-ts Her Hus band JK. 'Here's the coffee you so kindly loan, d me, Mrs. It horspoon," sa.d Mm. Cuii.hnek. "1 ilm I make a prac tise of bni'iowii:;:. b it v. in n I d" ask a neighbor for a ll'tle aeccomim-ilaliou 1 return what I hollow prompily. "Now, Mrs. Wap.-talf would be a model neighbor II she wasn't alwnya borrowing and lniip-Umw to pay back. A week ii;;.. sliu came over i.i.d bor rowed six -Kit. 1 hate to h I, 1 . Ks Wo buy our egp.s troi.i a farmer in tho country nml he brines lln'in lu while tin y are Iresli, and all his hens aro tlioroiinhlireils, and be feeds them scientific rations, nml ol couise, thu tgfts tiru superior. She said when she p.ol them that ahe'il return them the m-xt. iiiorniUK. The days went by, mid she was in our house a dozen times, and she never mentioned ihnsti rugs. I always brought the, conversmi.m around to 'BKS, but she didn't Boom to lake the bint, fo Dually I spoke rlUt out nml asked her why she d.dii't return thu Wts she borrowed. "1 have nvoidod that subject,' says Bbe, as cool an you please. In order to apuro your l. cliurs. 'i he fact is lhat they cro all bad. "Actually, Mrs. Wit horspoon, I was ao i..nd 1h.1t I eo'.hi-n say a word. The Id- a ol i neli an an. ill. in my own hoiile! And we i,u In such lloihlis and i.vpciisi- to p-.i Hie hist u-',n--i lu Uie stale!" "Thais always Die way when you try to aci in.iaioOaio p. oph-," lepln-d Mrs. Will.' isj eon "Wii 11 we v.ere tirsl nniriiid my hasbnnd s' t it down es 11 rule tl .it 1 il. oiilO in vr borrow anytbir.K l oin tie- im , Ki.lo . unless It was a nn. ' ot cm. rn'-m-v. I havu stlii ii lo tiiat rule 11s well as I could, but of coins..- a won. an who dm a her 01: l'iou; "v. in k simply has to borrow now and til. 11. "A le V (Jays HRtl 1 I. ceded III) rxtl'll sauce-an, 1.1. 0 I lan over to Mrs. (loo.-, wort! y s to ; 1 one. Kv ryle'dy knows lhat .Mrs. Coo-ewe' 1 h;' 1.. th.) Wnl'l-l hel l o-. e- u t IPs low II. "ll'-r lo'.-l-.i'ai is ji.st ;is had rs ?!n) Is. Mr. YP, l.ei ,.,i on 11,. 1! lu have a xnluaiiii- watch oi l; lhat I .- ui.'.ed ebuvi: everything and Mr. (iouseuoiihy even borrowed lhat, sayim; that ho hail a lot ol itiom y in Ui, Pou--e one Iiinht and was :ili-..i ! o, bur'ars. Ho put the (lot; In the cellar win re In wife bad 1. it a N.l el' poi oiied meat to kill ra.s im 1 in the in-, mi -is tlio (!oi; wan dead. Mr. Ceos.-v.iirihy came over ami told my husband about IU "Mr. itherspoon hit him and thiy fimeht all over the yard iur an hour, mill broVe down 11. y clothesline and tramp, -d tic clothes, and they spoiled nil th.- piai.ei im-s ami t arrant hushes and Just riiiii. il my bed of aaparni; is. Ai.d Mrs (.ioosev.nrlliy lob 1 honed fur tin- police, ami an officer can e ami ar rested Mi'. i ll her: tioi-ii, jo. t as if he. were to b!aiae, and it cost, him f I 1. "We didn't sp.ak for a l.'i.n llmo after that, but finally .Mrs. Coo.-.-wor-tliy bi-e.-iii 1,,-r borrowing i.rain. Sim had borrowed so mi'eh at our place that I naturally -.--n: u hi r wl.i a I needed a rnueeiian, in. ; In. hi me lnuo If cln eri nl'y 1 n. , :: !i. ,,.n l W' lit. I,o'i:e I di,m't 1- . il lo 1, so i; for (ill hour or m, ,-iml t'.eu wh. 1 1 red sen,,- waier nit-, i- J fonnl Uiat P. b aki d. I to,,!, i rl :l,t b .. 1, nml told Mi's, (eio- i oi ', b; hob- In it, iino nm.-1 have pin oh In 1 sa iccpan had .1 she ..:n, I il it had I .' d II. i.n i eh. for .pot, an il was as r.ooil a-i 'i t It. ami il i iiidn't ne at once li.'ie'd have I pet tin Mil' is tin- Cay sin hi buy la r :i new her oi in h.ii of mo. "Hut. I I. .no my i.piM ii, or P- r, so why n'onldu't sin- have hi r i.-.M-Vn of nie? I nm aurally Ji!,--j, about such thin ;s, Mrs. I'ninbuok." Children's Namen Hai irneije. Slio-.vie -:au is a j jtfi:: !..- ec'!c-, ran;.-, 10 it is nut : t v; . r : to :.m ihai P'"l who Si,-., th, r- 1. -e ; - .te ic nam. '. M-,-. I lu'da (.'v en ( : 1 li.it. pirn e has 1 ii'J.t c!iio,,-,.i. all 1 , -.-. I'm ii ; 'licin ;,lv. 11 a p.., ,,- t harinor.lze witii lis- mum- 01' 1!,,, ,.,-m !!; t.-r e'.ihl. Tile I::i Idle ,,,,,. ., ( four ol th.- l,ys i-isl in tlx- ' ::,,- laliie, wi,;)e 1! II ll' !" r,i nf tin (din r four In.ve a 1 1. in, -what i-imllai-rhai'ai"c' isii" . iiilir.,;. 'l'l,.- nami s m' til" chibii ui lire I '011 :,n, in Delhi i l, Walt- r 11. i'hert, Harrison W'llbeit, i-;p mei Alb'-rt, Arthur Ch.-.-t. r, Kr. Lester, l'l ;ii . 1; tin Svh-.-i. r nml i-'or-rest Manchc ,ter. At the Beginning. As th" launch pa soil close aioiiK side tin. trim pnvwrn tin i;t I. oat an chored lu uie hal.or M;s. Hi own cuiht !uht. ef the ciiptiiln, 1 inmliii; m iinj rail, m ar the bow. "Look, look, Ch.dys," i ho said to her llttlo daiiKliier. "There is the iiipta.ln. lJo you ye liini?" "Oh, w hi te In ho, rii.'iiinna ?" cried the child, cnm-ily. "Do yon mean that man ut the betinnin:,' of tho boat?"