Highland recorder., July 04, 1902, Image 1

About Highland recorder. (Monterey, Highland County, Va.) 1877-1972

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RECORDER
vol. xxiv.
MONTEREY,"HIGHLAND COUNTY, VA., JULY I. 1902.
NO. 26.
THE/1Y5TERT* OPTME
g^g^wm
^\L).'* tn 1" . ?*T , _ _J ''*k. x?/
Florence Warden,
Aultior of-"Tne Mouse on JUe A ar sh," cTc^j
I Copyright, 1895, ly obert Bonner's Sous.I
UHATTJEIC VIII.
Continued.
"And you viii not tell mc what that
sort of half-idea was?" interrupted
Clifford, eagerly,
i "No," answered Nell, firmlj..
? "Aud now?-' pursued Clifford.
"Now I have no more idea who did
lt than you have yourself. At first I
tried to think that this Mr. Lowndes
wout to sleep with his head full of
thoughts of robbery, and that he
dreamed all that long story that he
told us. But the more I thought about
his manner of telling us, the more I
could not help believing that lt was
not a dream, after all. And yet-"
"You saw no one go through your
room but bimi"
"No one," answered Nell, emphati?
cally.
"Could it have been?the?the serv?
ant, the woman I saw in the bar:"
suggested Clifford, wiih lowered voice.
Nell smiled sadly.
' "Poor Meg'.' No. Sile has been with
my uncle for fifteen ye:us; and, you
know, they say it is only lately, since
I have becu here, in faet," and again
she grew crimson, "that the thefts
have beeu committed. I am ashamed
to say that that night, when Mr.
Lowndes had told his story, I did go
into poor Meg's room, just to?just to
see if she was there. And sue was
fast asleep; really fast asleep, not
?hamming. I tried her with a lighted
candle before her eyes: you see I was
desperate," she added, in apology.
"And then I eveu went downstairs aud
had a look at old Nannie!''
And Nell looked deeply ashamed of
fae fact she was confessing.
But Clifford, who had naturally less
delicacy on the subject of Nannie aud
Meg, secretly cherished a hope that in
some inexplicable way one or the other
of these estimable persons might get
them all out of their difficulty by
eventually confessing to the thefts.
But he was careful to give uo hint of
this hope to Nell.
Clifford did not waut to see George
Claris, but he felt bound to do so. The
Innkeeper was, as he had anticipated,
Very surly in manner toward him, ami
he frustrated Clifford's Intention of
opening his heart to him on the sub?
ject of Nell by abruptly disappearing
from the bar almost as soon as the
young man entered it.
Clifford did not see Nell again; she
had entered the house at the back,
and he came lu by the front, and al?
though he lingered about until it was
almost dark in the hope that she
would relent and come out and bid
him farewell, he was obliged to re?
turn to Courtstairs and thence to town
without that consolation. Nell, on the
alert for the expected visitor, was not
long before she discovered him. Ile
came, only a few days after Clifford's
visit, lu the guise of a mild-looking
mau with sandy hair and pale eyes,
one of those men whose age it i3 diffi?
cult to guess until you perceive by a'
close inspection of Hie wrinkles under
thfc eyes that the apparent lad is well
over forty.
George Claris had no suspicion of
his visitor's profession. In spite of tho
rumors about the house, there were
travelers staying there about five
nights in the seven. But then these
were usually of a humble class, whose
pockets might be considered not
worth the picking.
The detective himself, for such he
was, called himself a commercial
traveler, and professed during thi four
nights he spent under the roof of the
Blue Lion, to.do a round..oLbusiness
calls in the neighboring towns, return?
ing to the inn toward evening, now
from one direction, now from another,
In a perfectly unostentatious and busi?
ness-like manner. On the second day
he announced that he should have
money to receive on the fourth, and
he made this announcement in the
presence of as many people as he
could. Jem Stickels, who still hung
about the Blue Lion with malicious
eyes on Nell, two or three other fish?
ermen and a couple of farm laborers
were in the har at the time.
Jem nudged one of his companions
and winked knowingly. Tiie detec?
tive, without appearing to do so, saw
the wink and took note ol' Jem.
When the last lingerer had been
turned out, and the Blue Lion had
closed its doors for the night the de?
tective made a few notes in his own
room before he went to bed.
On the fourth night, when he was
supposed to be in possession of the
collected money, the detective went
upstairs as usual, but uot to sleep.
He had avoided such an accident by
n nap iu the afternoon. Fully dressed
he lay down tinder the bed coverings,
and for three hours, listening Intently
to the slightest sound in tho house, he
waited.
Aud presently. ttboUl two hours be
foie the dawn, the expected visitor
earn**.
Very softly, w/.li Ihe rapid, light
movements of ntl expert, the Oguro
crept round by thu wall, groping,
?Marching. Thc mau In bed sprang- !
up. leaped out, aud placed his back :
against the door.
Then for iixe minutes he waited lu
Vd'u. Not a sound betrayed the pres I
euee of another person In the room,
Ile took a box of matches from hil
pocket and struck a light. He coulij
see the grearcr part or the small room,
but no trace of a human being beside
himself.
After the lapse of a few minutes it
occurred lo him that the intruder
might have coucealcd himself in a cup?
board which filled the recess between
the wall and the fireplace on the other
side of the bed. Trusting to his own
nimbleness to prevent the escape of
the thief he climbed quickly over the
bed, and had his hand on the cupboard
door when a sound behind him caused
him to turn his head just in time to
see the door of the room flung open
by the shadowy figure, who must have
been in hiding under the bed.
The detective sprang to the door,
and caught the disappearing figure by
the arm. Instautiy ic was as still as
a statue.
"Now I have got you!" cried the de?
tective between his teeth. "Let's have
a look at you."
Still holding the arm In a firm grip
he struck a fusee from a case he found
in his handiest pocket. Before he
could distinguish anything, however,
the light was promptly blown out by
bis prisoner, who began to struggle
violently. Still holding the glowing
fusee he tried, while holding his cap?
tive, lo distinguish Tier features ny' rna
red glow. In her frantic efforts to free
herself she flung the back of one im?
prisoned hand right upon the fusee,
and uttered a short cry of pain. The
next moment, by a dexterous twist,
she had wrenched herself away.
The next thing of which Hie detec?
tive was conscious was that there was
a sound like a fall at the bottom of
the stairs, and then the back door was
opened and shut again with a bang.
CHAPTER IX.
fhirsintr his own ill-luck and tho
deftness and fleetness 6T toot or n;s
antagonist, the detective hurried down
the stairs and dashed out by the back
door just as he heard the voice of
George Claris from above calling out
to know what wai the matter.
Now, there was by this time enough
daylight for the detective to flatter
himself that the chase would be a
short one when once he got out of
doors. He was surprised to And,
therefore, that the mysterious creat?
ure he was pursuing had vanished al?
together, leaving no trace. Dashing
out among the cabbage-stumps he had
a wide view over the fields and across
the little river. But there was not a
sound, uot the flutter of a skirt, to
help him in his search. He went care?
fully around the house, in the first
place, trying the doors of the out?
houses aud peering about for nooks
and corners in which the thief might
lie hidden. As for the house Itself,
the Tower windows were secured by
shutters and bore no sign of having
been tampered with, while the front
door was securely fastened from the
inside. Ile then made his way to the
group of cottages which stood near,
aud questioned a laborer, who was
just leaving one of them jto ^o to his
work, as to whether he had seen any
person within the last few minutes.
The man answered in the negative.
Returning to tho back of the inn
the detective was struck by the cir?
cumstance that a punt which had been
moored at the inn side of the river
befor*} he made his tour of the house,
was now fastened to a post by the op?
posite bank. He had just noted this
circumstance when the innkeeper
came out.* He looked very surly, and
he went up to the sham commercial
traveler in a threatening manner.
"So it's you that's been tumbi* the
plaee upside down, is it? An' all for
what? That's what I'd like to know?
All for what?"
"You'll know all in good time," said
the detective, dryly. "I want to seo
the women folk in your house, if you
please, ladles and all. I dare say you
know what I've come about. I don't
want to be of any more trouble than I
can help, but I've got to clear this
business up."
"Well, you may ferret It out your
own way, then," said Claris, sullenly.
"I'm not going to have nobody dis
turbed by you."
"Well," returned the other, in a con?
ciliatory tone, "I don't want to put
the ladies to any inconvenience, I'm
sure. But if they'll answer a few
question they'll hell* me, and you, too.
For I'm sure, sir, it's by no wish of
yours that these lales have got about,
and that you'll be very glad to hear
the last of them."
"That's as it may be," said George.
"But I'll not stand any inquisitor'?
work to set them all in "hysterics. And
anyhow, by this time they're all out
an' about, and if you waut to talk to
them, you may find 'em."
The detective took Claris's insolence
very quietly. Remembering the inci?
dent of the fusee, lie was able te
chuckle to himself with the thought
that he held the clue of which George
Claris knew nothing.
"There'll be a burn on her hand,"
he thought to himself, "for many a
tiny."
Returning to the house by the door
through which he had left, he noticed,
now in the broader daylight, that
there was a large cupboard immedi?
ately opposite, under the stairs. Open*
ing the door of this cupboard, which
he found unfastened, he saw that tho
contents were in some disorder, and
he waited about until Meg. the serv?
ant, came to it to fetch her brooms.
. The woman started with a gruff ex?
clamation at his appearance.
"There's nothing for you to be fright?
ened about," said he, quietly. "I only
want you to tell me whether that ia
exactly the state in which you left
the cupboard when you went to it
last."
lt had needed only a very few mo?
ments for him to decide that this was
not the woman of whom he was in
search. Stout, broad, clumsy of move?
ment and heavy of tread, the robust
figure before him had certainly none
of the nimbleness.of_Oie thief, of.whom
he was in search. He had had expe?
rience enough to know how to assume
an entirely reassuring manner with
persons of her stamp, and it took her
only a few minutes to recover her self
possession and to answer him intelli?
gently.
"Why, no it ain't," she said, with ro?
bust surprise and vehemence. "The
things 'as been knocked dowu au'
trampled on. au' all my cloths niixed
up. why do you think," slr," she wen!
on with round eyes, "that the thiel
Itself has been in here?"
Aud she looked back at her brooms,
her pails and her cloths with a mix
ture of amazement, fear and respect.
"Well, somehody's been in there,
that's evident, isu't it?" said he, good
Lmmoredly.
And he decided in his own mind thal
the clever thief had opened and shut
the back door loudly as a blind, and
had secreted herself in this cupboard
until he was safely out of the house.
"I suppose you don't happen to have
seen him about this morning?" ht
went on, in a ,iocular tone.
"Seen the thief! Lor, no, slr. If he's
been in the house he must have goi
out again pretty quick, for I got dowu
pretty near as soon as the master
himself; an' there was nobody about
then, for sure, but 'im and me and
Miss Nell."
"The poor young lady was fright?
ened, I'm afraid, by the commotion?"
"Oh, well, we're used to these set
outs hy this time," replied Meg, philo?
sophically. "Miss Nell did look very
white an' faint-like, an' she was all of
a tremble, poor thing, when she heard
ibout the fuss. So master packed her
off to the colonel's, and tpld her as she
was to stop there till he sent for her."
"The colonel's! And who is the colo?
nel?" -
"Oh, an old gentleman as lives a lit?
tle way from here along the Court?
stairs road. Miss Nell takes them their
milk there fresh from the cow every
morning and evening."
"Oh," remarked the detective, high?
ly satisfied at having tapped the fount
of Meg's loquacity. "I should have
thought she was too much of a fine
lady for that, your Miss Nell."
"Ah, but she wouldn't do it for any?
body else," replied Meg, anxious to de?
fend her mistress. "You see, the col?
onel an' his daughter are real gentle?
folks, only they're poor?very poor.
An' they don't keep no servant, an'
Miss Theodora does all the work her?
self. So, you see,"as she's been kind
to Miss Nell, an' got the master to give
Miss Nell her fine eddication and
French an' the planner, why, Miss
Nell don't seem to know how to do
enough for her. That's how it is, sir.
I'd be glad to take the milk myself,
or Tte could easy get the boy to do it,
only Miss Nell likes to do it herself
like."
The detective was about to interro?
gate Meg further, when the voice of
the innkeeper, shouting to her to know
why breakfast was not ready, pre?
vented his hearing any more. And,
much to his regret, he found on his
next meeting with her that the poison
of suspicion had been Instilled into
her mind by her master, and that she
was communicative no longer.
Finding this source of information
dry, therefore, the detective, who
shrewdly concluded that Nell would
not return until he had taken his de?
parture, sent a boy off toward Stroan
with his luggage on a barrow, and
paid his bill and went away.
But he did not go very far. Over?
taking the boy he made him leave his
luggage at Stroan station, and as soon
as the lad was out of sight he bad lt
taken to one of the inns of the place.
This done he had his luncheon and
walked back to the Blue Liou.
He did not want to put in an appear?
ance until he knew whether Miss Nell
had returned from her visit to her
friend. But it was a slack time of
day at the inn, and there was nobody
about of whom he could ask a ques?
tion. He managed to get a peep into
Hie bar as he walked past the house,
but there was no one there, either in
front or behind. When he had hung
about the place some time, keeping as
much out of view of possible watchers
as he could he saw the robust figure
of Meg ac the side door. She was
shaking out a cloth. She started and
uttered a little gasp at sight of him.
"Why," said he, getting, by a dexter?
ous movement, between her and the
door, "what's the matter? You look
scared at the sight of me."
"Well, I don't waut to have any
more to say to you, and that's the
fact," replied stalwart Meg, with her
hands on her hips. "It seems you're
nothing better than a detective chap,
what's coming ferreting about the
place, asking questions and trying to
get us all into trouble. Ugh; I'm
ashamed to be seen talking to you!"
"Well, now, can't you see that it is
for the good of all of you that this af?
fair should be cleared up, and that it
should be known who it is that has
brought the bad name on the houseT*
said the detective, persuasively. "I'm
very sure you ladies must be fright*
ened out of your lives to hear the
things that are said. It'll end by your
all going away from the place like
Miss Nell has done."
To be Continued. J ^^a*?a
KING EDWARD
OPT OF DANGER
The Doctors Report Very Satisfactory
Progress.
IMPROVEMENT MAINTAINED AT NIGHT.
Thc Wound Occasionally Causes Discomfort
But no Alarm ls attached to this Symplon
?Thc Klnjj Has Been transferred from hil
Bed to fl Whe.eled Couch?Also Sits lp for
a Time and Continua Bright and Cheerful.
London (By Cable).?King Edward's
physicians announced in the latest bul?
letin that the royal patient's progress
was entirely satisfactory.
Sunday night passed with less inci?
dent at Buckingham Palace than any
other night since tflie operation was per?
formed on King Edward. There were
fewer watchers outside the palace, the
public apparently having accepted thc
official announcement that the King has
passed the point of immediate danger.
'j:?fi^J
KING. EDWARD VII.
Sunday was again a day of interces
uocal services throughout the kingdom
for the recovery of King Edward. In
the morning a vast crowd of the gen?
eral public gathered at St. Paul's Cathe?
dral. There was also present a repre?
sentative gathering of government and
colonial officials and uniformed colo?
nial officers. The Duke and Duchess
of Connaught and their children and
Lord and Lady Lansdowne sat tinder
hz dome.
Queen Alexandra, thc Prince of
Wales and almost all-the other mem?
bers of the royal family now in London
attended a similar morning service in
Marlborough House chapel, while
there was a large gathering of peers
lUd peeresses at a service held at noon
in the Chapel Royal at St. James' Pal?
ace.
Official Bulletins.
Following arc thc official bulletins of
he King's condition, which arc signed
ry Lord Lister, Sir Frederick Trevcs,
Sir Thomas Smith, Sir Thomas Barlow
ind Sir Francis Laking; Saturday?
10.45 A. M.?"The King had a good
night and his improved condition is
maintained. We are happy that we arc
able to state that we consider his Maj?
esty to bc now out of immediate dan?
ger and thc general condition is satis?
factory. The operation wound, how?
ever, still needs constant attention, and
such concern as attaches to his Majes?
ty's condition is connected with ? the
wound. Under the most favorable con?
ditions his Majesty's recovery must, of
necessity, be protracted. The 2 P. M.
bulletin will be discontinued."
6 P. M.?"The King passed a very
comfortable day and his progress con?
tinues to be quite satisfactory."
11 P. M.?"The King has passed a
comfortable day, and his strength has
been well maintained. The wound oc?
casionally causes discomfort."
Sunday, 9 A. M.?"The King feels
stronger, in spite of some discomfort
from the wound. Noticing has occurred
to disturb thc satisfactory progress the
King is making."
4 P. M.?"The King's progress is in
every way satisfactory. The local dis?
comfort has decreased."
io P. M.?"Thc progress of the King
is entirely satisfactory."
May Bc Crowned ia September.
London (By Cable).?A dispatch to
the Daily Mail froth Copenhagen says
that Queen Alexandra has invited the
deputation of Danish Hussars to return
to London at the end of September for
the coronation of the King.
This is particularly significant in that
it indicates the Queen's assurance of the
complete recovery of King Edward and
his ability to undergo the ordeal attend?
ant upon the coronation festivities three
months hence.
H&3 No Organic Trouble.
Washington (Special).?A cable mes?
sage was received at the State Depart?
ment from Mr. Whitelaw Reid, head of
the special embassy to the coronation,
giving a most favorable account of the
condition of King Edward VII. He
says that the physicians attending thc
King anticipate his rapid recovery. Mr.
Reid says among those entirely famil?
iar with the case it is well understood
that there is no foundation for alarming
reports that thc King has cancer or
any serious throat or stomach trouble.
According to Mr. Reid, the strength,
nerves and sound blood of the King arc
all in his favor. A most favorable
symptom in his case is that he has
been taking solid food.
Explosion Shakes Alfonso's Palace.
Madrid (By Cable).?A gunpowder
magazine at thc encampment of Cara
banchol, five miles from here, exploded.
Two men were killed and 14 injured.
The shock was felt for miles. Scores
of house* were damaged, the doors of
the royal palace were thrown open by
the force of the explosion, and many
windows were smashed. The King ac?
companied by the members of his
household, joined the crowd which
hurried to thc scene in order to ascer?
tain the extent of the damage.
k
SUMMARY OF THE LATEST NEWS.
Domestic
R. A. Lancaster, banker and broker,
of RTchmond, Va., widely known in fi?
nancial circles throughout the country,
died at his home, in Bath county, Va.
ric was 73 yeaf9 old. Death was caused
by heart failure.
An unsuccssful attempt was made to
rob the Newport (Del.) National Bank.
The burglars were frightened off whiic
forcing an entrance.
At the International Sunday School
Convention in Denver the benefits de?
rived from use of uniform Sunday
School lessons were dwelt upon.
Interesting and satisfactory tests
were made near Cleveland with hatha
mite, a new explosive, thc invention of
Prof. H. M. Hathaway.
The Supreme Court of Missouri or?
dered that testimony be taken on ques?
tion whether meat packers are in a
combine.
A New York bicyclist was so badly
frightened by the collision of a fellow
rider with a street car that he fell dead.
In Chicago Charles W. Gale tried
twice to shoot a barber. Gale fell dead
when police broke into his office.
The strike of car cleaners of the Pull?
man Company in Chicago has been de?
clared off.
The International Sunday School
Convention at Denver elected Rev. Dr.
B. B, Tyler, pastor of 'thc South Broad?
way Christian Church, Denver, presi?
dent of the association.
Governor Montague, of Virginia, is?
sued a proclamation calling the Legisla?
ture into extra session July 15 to put
thc new Constitution into effect.
Articles of incorporation of the As?
sociation of Manufacturers and Distrib?
uters <if Food Products were filed in
Trenton, N. J.
The American Association for the Ad
\ancement of Science is in session in
Pittsburg.
The American Steel Foundries, capi?
tal $40,000,000, was incorporated at
Trenton.
Melvin L. Youngs, a prominent Ma?
son, of Milwaukee, is dead.
Anthony S. Sherman, cashier of the
Merchants Bank in Newport, R. I., who
shot himself last week because of a
heavy shortage in his accounts, is dead.
VV. II. Raker, vice-president of the
Postal Telegraph Company, announc?
ed that a contract had been agreed upon
with thc Pennsylvania Railroad Com?
pany.
Major Robert F. Mascn. a member
of Gen. Fitzhugh Lee's staff during the
Cvil War, and a dashing soldier, died
at his home near Charlottesville, Va.
There was a bad freight wreck on thc
Norfolk & Western Railroad, near
Roanoke. Thirty-three box cars were
destroyed and a white tramp was killed.
Formal announcement was made ot
the incorporation of thc American
Steel Foundries, under a New Jersey
charter, with a capital of $40,000,000.
Thc Virginia Constitutional Conven?
tion adjourned sine die after a love
feast. There was a big banquet in
Richmond.
Foreljn.
Arguments were made by counsel for
the Russian and American govern?
ments before the Dutch arbitrator, Dr.
Asser, in the sealing controversy.
Fighting was reported at Cape Hay?
den between thc opposing factions, and
the situation there is said to be ex?
tremely grave.
The Cabinet of Sweden has resigned
and Erik Gustav Bostrom, the former
premier, has consented to form a new
one.
S. F. Edge, a_n Englishman, won the
James Gordon Bennett cup in the auto?
mobile race from Paris to Innspruck.
Queen Alexandra received Mr. and
Mrs. Whitelaw Reid in farewell audi?
ence at Buckingham Palace.'
Patrick McHugh. the Irish M. P.,
committed for contempt, was taken to
Holloway Jail, in London.
The American yacht Uncle Sam won
the Kaiser's gold cup in thc regatta at
Kiel.
Advices were received announcing the
safe arrival at Adis Abeba, capital of
Abyssinia, of Fitzhugh Whitehouse, of
Newport, R. I., and Fred Hindlip, who
are exploring the Upper Nile.
Thc Humbert case was made the oc?
casion of a vote of confidence in the
government, and the French Chamber
of Deputies sustained the government
by a vote of 49.3 to 74.
Hoodlums in the provincial towns of
England, irritated because cheated of
their coronation festivities, indulged in
"mafficking," requiring police interfer?
ence.
The latest bulletins from the sick
room indicate that King Edward's phy?
sicians consider him out of danger, un?
less unlooked-for complicatinos inter?
vene.
A rupture is imminent between Co?
lumbia and Nicaragua because Presi?
dent Zelaya has sent coal and munitions
of war to the Colombian insurgents.
President Loubct of France has sign?
ed a decree closing 30 religious estab?
lishments which have not complied with
the Law of Associations.
The American and British mission
buildings at Tien Ku Chao were de?
stroyed by a mob and a missionary was
murdered. ap
The first consignment of Boer pris?
oners sailed from St. Helena for South
.Africa.
During the past year the emigrants to
Siberia numbered 128.700.
The American yacht Uncle Sam,
owned by F. R. Riggs, of New York,
won the first of the international class
races, the Stars and Stripes crossing the
line eight minutes ahead of all other
flags.
Emperor William wired Prince Henry
in London, offering to come immediate?
ly if his uncle, the King, was in any
immediate danger. Prince Henry sent
a reassuring message in reply.
Financial.
The Atchison's May gross earnings
increased $73,910, net increased $31,311.
Thc principal movement of money in?
dicates that the New York banks have
gained thereby $2,619,100.
Thc New York Cotton Exchange
makes the amount of cotton brought
into sight for the week 52,776 bales.
The New York Subtreasury state?
ment shows that the banks have lost
$1,552,000 during thc week.
The City Council of Scranton, Pa.,
is considering the question of issuing
$140,000 viaduct and bridge bonds._
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A
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UNE has been a national weeklv newspaper, read al?
most entirely by farmers, and has enjoyed the conti*
dence aud support of the American people to a degree
never attained by any similar publication.
THE NEW YORK TRIBUNE FARMER
is made absolutely for farmers and their families. The
first Dumber m issued November 7th, 1901.
Every department of agricultanil industry is covered
by special contributors who ere leaden in this respective
lines, and the THIBUNE PARKER will be ni every sence
a high crass, up to date, live, enterprising paper, pro?
fusely illustrated with pictures of live stock, model build?
ings and homes, agricultural machinery, etc
Farmers' wives, sons and daughters will find special
pajjes for their cniertainnu-nt.
Regular price, U.00 per year, hut you eau buy it with your
favorite bona weekly newspaper, Tho Highland Recorder, on?
year for ?1.50.
bend your subscriptions and money to TUE RECORDER,
Monterey, Va.
Semi your tiRine mut a?l<lrrs*. to the NEW VORK TKI
BVint WAmXUKBt flow Vork City, and a free sainple copy
ivill be m.'iile I to you.
WISHED HE HAD THE STORY BACK
Fanny Tale I.o?t on Non-Apprecl?tlv?
German Audience.
Col. Adolphus Busch, who has been
doing some booming as a member of
the St. Louis Exposition exploiting
committee, tells the following story:
"Last summer when I went to Eu?
rope I took along my head brewer,
whose admiration for his adopted
country is only equaled by his desire
to appear thoroughly Americanized.
Together we visited his native town in
Germany, where he was made much
of. Of course they had a 'kommers,'
and my companion took the oppor?
tunity to endeavor to make a speech
after the American style, but in the
German language, of course. He start?
ed out boldly, though be ls no public
speaker, and got along fairly well un?
til he attempted the funny story which
he knew should accompany every
American speech worthy the name. It
was funny, I assure you, as he told it,
but his hearers were too well-man?
nered to laugh at their fellow-towns?
man, and so it fell flat. Discouraged
and disgusted by this lack of appre?
ciation of American humor, he drop?
ped heavily into his chair, and, lean?
ing across the table, whispered hoarse?
ly to me:
" 'I'd gif ten tollars If dot story was
pack into me.'"?New York Times
States Exchange Amenities.
The act of Gov. Jefterson Davis of
Arkansas in pardoning a negro con?
vict on condition that he should be?
come a citizen of Massachusetts is con?
strued by Col. Thomas Wentworth as
a marked compliment to the Bay
State. Gov. Davis' object was to give
I ne people of Massachusetts an oppor?
tunity to reform "what they are
pleased to call the poor, oppressed
negro of the south," and Col. Higgin?
son says that the southern executive
evidently "realizes that we knew how
to take cara of convicts, white or
black, which Arkansas does not."
For an li.c ilntnl Bal***
The Hollander's first duty in Couth
Africa ls to support an administration,
honest and impartial, untainted by
the touch of gold; and, as long as it
be honest, it is no concern to our
Hollander whether it be English ot>
German or Boer or "international'
What the Hollander has to a<ianl
against is the influence of tire Dop
pers and the Krugerites bofrng again
introduced into South Africa, and
against Holland beine>made the ren?
ter of intrigue by tferosn who seek to
regain the authojtfty which has now
been lost to thy*m.?Hague Hollandia.
GLAD SEASON SURELY AT HAND
Signs and Symptoms by Which One
May Recognize Spring.
"Well, spring has come at last,"
yawningly said the Old Codger, as he
sat in his back-tilted chair with his
feet comfortably placed on the railing
of the veranda. "The grass is comin'
up, the trees are buddin', the boys are
fightin' in the streets every day, the
sweet scent of the what's-its-name is
in the air, the so-and-so's are swingin'
and singin' on the swayin' boughs, the
clatter of the borrowed lawn mower ls
beginnin' to be heard in the land, and
the coal dealer commences to treat his
fellow-men like equals.
"Last year's jokes are beginnin' to
appear in the newspapers, spring
poems are bein' sprung, the patent
churn man comes smllin' up the road,
we begin to read items about little
girls dyin' from the effects of Jumpin'
the rope four hundred times apiece,
my nephew, who mistakes laziness for
intellectuality, is hintin' about hiss
willin'ness to accept a lucrative situa?
tion, the man who knows it all has got
a bad cold from changin' his under?
wear too previously, Aunt Matilda is
brewin' a jar of herb decoctions that I
know from painful experience will be
potent enough to burn a hole In a
brass monkey; and I've got aches and
pains and ya*wns and symptoms ard
the allovers till I can scarcely ail
down or stand up, or go to bed, or dc
anything else with any degree of com?
fort. Yes; I think the glad spring
time has got here at last."?Cassell'?
Saturday Journal.
Fanny Fishermen.
In England the boys?and some?
times grown men?have a very funny
way of catching fish.
You would never guess what lt la,
so I might just as well tell you right
?ff.
It was an English boy who told me
about it
"You must catch a goose,' he 6ald,
"and that ls the hardest part. Then
you tie a line which has a baited hook
on one end to the goose's leg.
"Then let her go. She'll make Iv
the "vater every shot, and as she
swims about she, of course, draws
hook and line after her.
"Pretty soon a fish bites and mayba
gets hooked.
"Then the goose feels something
tugging at her leg, and she swims
along about as hard as she can, but
this only makes the tugging worse.
The only way to get away from that
awful something, she thirks, ls to get
out of the water.
"So, with wildly beating wings, shs
makes for the snore at a rattling
pace."