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42 Oration Over Csesax. W’Wt &**■? 4i*L Slukfc peart wmle his Version. .From the Oil City Derriek. Fiietids. Romans, countrymen! .Lent) me vour ears: I will return them next Saturday, i come To bury C.esak, because the times arc hard Au<l his folks can't afford to hire an under taker. Ttye evil that men do lives after them. In the shape of progeny that, reap the Benefit of their life insurance. Ho let it be with the deceased. Pt ':T.n hathtohi vont '.*c*ah w as ambitious; Wiiat does Brutus know about it f It is hone of liis funeral. Would that it vvcrt}! . Here, under lea\ e of von. 1 come to Make a speech at Cjksak’s funeral, l ie was mv friend, faithful and just to me; He loaned me $5 oiice w hen 1 was in a pinch And signed my petition for a post, office. Bat Brutus says he was ambitious. Bratus should wipe off his chin. C.ksaK hath brought many captives home to Home Who broke rock on the streets until their ransoms I >id the general coffers fill. When that the poor hath cried, C.ksau hath w ept, Because it didn’t cost anything, and Made, him solid with the masses. iCheersd Ambition should be made of sterner stuff. Vet Brutus says he* was ambitions. VVrutus is a liar and 1 can prove it. Yon all did see that on the Lnpereal 1 thrice presented him a kingly crown Which thrice did he refuse, because it did not fit him quite. Was this ambitious I Vet Brutus says he was ambitious. Bratus is not only the biggest liar in the country. But ho is a horse-thief of the deepest dye. (Applause. IT you have tears, prepare To shed them now. (Laughter. You all do know this ulster. I remember the first time ever i.',s;sah put it on. It was on a summers cveniug in his tent. With, the thermometer registering ninety degrees in the shade: But it was an ulster to he pronu of. And cost him t 7 at Marcus Swart/.m yer's. Corner of Fulton and Kerry streets, simi of the red flag. Old Swartz wanted s'4o for it. But finally came down to “7 because it was our friend! Was this ambitious r i If Brutus says it was He is even a greater liar than Mrs. Tilton ! Look! in this place ran Cassius's dagger through: Through this the son of a gun of Brutus stabbed, And, when he plucked his cursed steel away, * , , Mark Antony how the blood of C.ESak fol lowed it! (Cheers and cries of " Live.us some thing on the Silver bill. 5 ’ "Hit him again.” Ac., &c.) I come not, friends, to steal away your hearts, I am no thief, as Brutus is. Brutus has a monopoly of all that business. And if he had his deserts, he would be In the penetentiary, a ud don’t you forget it! .Kind friends, sweet friends, I do not wish to stir you lip - • ‘nree’m^Tu-.w -'’’.fßevn*! beatetww llPprooeKi t>plai -f The ooftin in the hearse, And we will proceed to bury C v.sar. Not to praise him. The Widower’s Story, Clevelaud Herald. He walked into the Health Office and said he wanted a burial permit. Asked tor the physician’s certificate, he said he didn’t have any ; hut it was all right—she was dead. The jauntiness and cheerfulness ot the applicant striking the clerk as somewhat peculiar in connection with the solemnity of the errand, he ques tioned lurcher and asked the name ot the deceased. " Iler name ' Oh! Why it's Doro thy Ann Bugsby—my wife,you know. Yes,” continued Mr. Bugsby, with unabated cheerfulness, “she’s gone at last and it. makes me feel awful bad when I think of it; seems as if I’d lost a friend. Why, 1 han't, lelt so since I lostmydoglast summer—shot, you know by the police—but. as Mrs. fitigsby always said, I ain’t easy knocked over, and consequently after J’d buried him—the dog, you know— and shed a tear or two, I braced right up again. No use givin’ up, you know, and so when I get the old wo man buried, I shall go right along as ’ though nothing had happened. It’s kind o’ sorrowful to think of. though, and I wish the job was over. But she shall have a good send of?’, if I have to go without a spring suit to do it— that’s the kind of a hairpin I am; i nothing mean about me. You ought to see the coffin ; nice black one, with ! silver plated handles and a plate with i her full name and address on it—lj mean her age; and the nails 1 it’s full j of them. Bossed the job myself; told ! the carpenter I wanted it right, regard-1 less of expense—within limits, you ] know, within limits. Ah ! ” reflected j the widower with something like a ; sigh, “she was a remarkable woman, j one in ten thousaud. So observing; j took so much interest in my welfare; ! always had something to say when I ! came home—especially when I came ) late at night. Seems as though I can I hear her now, as 1 used to when I was j coming in quietly so’a not to disturb i anybody Butfitjnfver was any rise,* I don't,jqemefnrcr now Of' ever!getting iff rfned—specially fattfar nlgftt—that she didn't hear me. Some wbm&ti? would a been sulky like*. tlienT VWT never say nothing. But that wasn’t her. 'Here von are,! drunk again, y-ou old beast!' she'd say. Very outspoken was Dorothy, and I must say she was party clear headed and generally got things about right. She'd a remark able keen sense of humor, too. had Dorothy, and i nauiuotUti' 1- nearly laughed myself t<> death one night at something she said when I came in. I disremember just what it was, but I know she got awful mad at my laugh in,' and said I was a long gangling old fool—l am a little lengthy in the legs, you know. Hut. I never minded her; 1 knew she meant well, though she was a little queer some limes in her way of carrvin’ out her moanin'. Dear! dear ! well, it can't he helped ; but I wouldn't have had it happen tor $25.” <; !No‘r said the clerk, much affected. ‘ Fact. Well, if you won't give the permit without the certificate. I guess I’ll mosey around and get one, lor she won’t keep much longer. I don't see any use in it, though, for she’s dead as a herrin’.” And wiping the perspiration from his brow and remarking that it ,w as warm to-day but looked like rain. he departed to procure the necessary certificate. Origin and Evolution of Fans. From the Fall Mall Gazette, The London Fanmakers Company, observing with regret that the use of the fan has for some years past been on the decline in England, propose t reinstate it in public favor by means of an exhibition of fans, which is to, lie held this summer. The British. Museum possesses a valuable colleen tion of ancient fans, which it doubtless, might be prevailed upon to lend for such a purpose; and there are, or used to be, at the East India Museum some interesting specimens of Chinese and Japanese fans, which would figure with advantage iu the projected dis play. The fundamental idea of the fan is said to have been hit upon a great many centuries ago at a certain Feast ~ fif ica st, daughter ot an eminent mandarin, found herself so hot that, contrary to all etiquett, she was obliged to take off her mask ; with which —partly to hide her blushes, partly to cool her heated face—she commenced upon herself the process which we now call “tanning.” The action was seen and admired by Kan-si’s young compan ions; and at once, says the narrator of this truthful legend, “ten thousand hands agitated ten thousand masks.' 1 Other writers have discovered tic origin of the fan in the necessity tilt lin all hot countries for keeping oil' ! flies, whether from sacred offerings j in the temples or from the hands and : face of the officiating priest or from } the persons of the population general j ly. In India and China the original ] model ot the fan is said to have been ; the wing of a bird; and an admirable fan can always be made from two birds’ wings, joined lay a strip of wood. The fan of the high priests of Isis was iu the form of a half circle, made oi' feathers of different lengths. Such, too, were the fans carried in triumphal processions, and which among the 1 Egyptians served as military stand • ards in time, of war. The Sibyls are said to have been in the habit of tan ning themselves as they delivered their braeles—the fan being evidently not regarded in those days as in any •way connected with frivolity. The fans carried bv the Homan ladies were not, like-the most ancient Chineses fan. made in one piece, whether of paper, gauze, or silk, but were composed of little tablets of perfumed wood. The ladies of high fashon were followed when they went out walking by fan bearers or Jlabclli | and guests of both sexes were fanned at dinner by slaves charged with this particular duty. The earli est reference to fans on the part ot a classical author occurs in Euripides’s tragedy of “Helena," where one of the characters, a eunuch, relates how. according to the Phrygian custom, he has tanned the hair, face, and, bosom of the beautiful heroine. i ho fans ot the Middle Ages were m good society worn suspended from the girdle by chains of gold, and wore usually made of feathers; those of the peacock, ostrich, parrot, and pheasant being preferred. They were sold in THE FLORIDA AGRICULTURIST. largo numbers at the iparlrets of the Levant, whence they wef* sent direct ito Vjenice, and trom -Veutte to other parts ot' Italy. Themfi‘ iS A sSffa to have been introduced in France by Catherine de Medicis, where it was quickly adopted not only by women, but also by effeminate, men. Thus Henry lll.'s notorious mignons hab itually carried fans. 1 ndcr Louis XIV. and XV. the art of painting or namental fans was brought to great perfection. Among the Celebrated painters who have not disdained to employ their’jtalents in the artistic decoration of the fan, YV atteau, and his successor, Boucher, must first be named. In our own time Diaz, the great colorist; Eugene Land, chiefly known by his marine pictures; Hamon, the painter of scenes from ancient Roman life; and Gavarni. celebrated as a caricaturist, but who has exer cised his talent in almost every style of pictorial art, have all painted fans. The most famous sculptor and decor- of fans in the present day is Fro m'ent-Meurice, generally known as a goldsmith and jeweler, but who is in ftet a great artist. The French Fan makers’ Company was established by edict in 168!], when to be received into the guild or corporation it was declared necessary to have served full* years apprenticeship and to have produced a “masterpiece. dhe mas terpiece, however, was not required ot the sons of fanmakers, nor of appren tices who have married fanmakers daughters. A great number of ’processes are . employed in fanmaking. The frame has to be cut, shaped, polished, tritn (’L engraved, inlaid, painted, gtini d, colored, and ,retouched. Yet jr passing through so many hands i fans can be sold in Paris at one sou (apiece. This is the lowest possible gjgure ; the highest quotation, except Kspcciai cases, as where the talents a great painter are called into rc- Hiisition, being S4OO. Fans are broad ly divided into two classes; those consisting of one web of paper or silk, 4H l those that are made tip of several thin strips of wood or other material. The former are held to be the best for fanning, ihe latter for shuffling, or for the mameuvre known in the days of Ihe “Spectator” as “flirting” the fan. # It was during the reign of Eliza -i— -about t.luHvonr T7tj V<m fans were t“' imponeu to to *EngntTnt. — They are said to have been brought from Italy, but probably reached Englnad from France, where they were brought into fashion about 1500 by Catherine de Medicis. Josh Billings on Pets. Pets ov all kinds are a noosnce.— Pet a male with a klub and he iz pa shunt, but pet him with oats and lie will kick out one end of kreashum. Pet dogs are full of fleas, and pet monkeys are full ov the devil. Ail pet children are tyrants, and opinyuns, like second hand clothings, are worth just what you kan git fur them. A pet horse learns to be frisky, and a pet servant bekums cunning at the expence of his honesty. Pet friends are the hardest to keep, and when yu do lozet hem they turn fromhuny to gaul, and pets ov all kinds are fas tidious. A pet cow can't tell what her next mischief will be, and ov all pets none are moro nasty an cross than a pet parrot. Nothing in this world wax, made to be petted, for nothing waz made to require it. Pot liobbys are plenty and easy to mount, but hard to stick to. and the ditches, all along life’s turnpike are tilled with with riders. A pet lam alwus makes a kross ram, and what has been once petted can never live without it.— Live pets ov all kinds are sure to be lazy, and from being lazy to being sassv is but a short step, and is sure to be taken. Too much petting brings luxuiance fust, and then ruin. I have seen garden sass petted so much that it all run to top and to vines. Pet kats are, fust, an insult to the. kat, and, next, are an insult to the party that pets them; and there is no more excuse for boarding a pet poodle and luggin them around than there is for boarding and toteing a bedbug. Too Swekt. —.She had invited him to stay to supper, and he was trying to appear easy and unconcerned, while she was on her prettiest behavior.— “Have you used the sugar, John?” inquired the mother in a winning man ner. “John don’t wont no sugar,” ejaculated the young heir adruptly.— ‘•Why not ? ” inquired the father fu riously, while John in his surprise, swallowed a bit of toasted crust, and nearly cut bis throat open. “ Cos lift don't/’ explained the heir, in an artful manner. “ I heard him tell Mary last night--/You keep still, - ’ interrupt ecT Mary in a hysterical manner, while thep young man caught his breath in dismay. “I heard him say," persisted the heir, with dreadful eagerness "that she was so sweet that he shouldn’t never use no more sugar no more— an" -then he kissed her, an' I said I d tell, an’ —” The young heir was lifted out of the room on his ear, and the supper was finished in moody silence. A New Language. A prominent citizen took it into his head to rise early the other moning to take some healthful exercise before breakfast time. When be got to the first bar lie concluded to go in and take a cocktail—a man needs some little stimulant when he broke over bad habits and got up so early. Just one cocktail, and not another drop before breakfast. When he got in side the bar two men were engaged in an argument on the Eastern ques tion, in which he become so interest ed that ho forgot all about his walk until it was time to go home to break fast, and every time one or the other disputants would get the best of the argument, he would "treat the house. " When the citizen got home the break fast was cold, bis legs unsteady, and his voice thick, and he spoke to his wife with a Russian accent. When she asked him how he enjoyed his walk, and if he didn't know that breakfast was cold, and what made him look and act so queer, he said, “Bin ’gaged in a naminated scushion er Rooshin war tookerhextra eoek tailertwo.'’ His wife was surprised at the facility with which he had learned a foreign language, but ex pressed herself in effect that early rising and walks belore breakfast were not as conducive to health as lying in bed until breakfast was ready. Never Saw One of Them. Two gentlemen from New York, one of whom had been in California nearly a*rear, and the other just ar aiwjiL .w4uo,:i-cyoj)!ally overheard in tne following conversation at the frit ter House, Sacramento. The new comer was lamenting his condition, when he asked the other it' he had a family. "Yes, sir. I have a wife and six children in New York, and never saw one of them."’ After this, the couple sat a lew mo ments in silence, and then the inter rogator again commenced : "Were you ever blind sir 'r' ! "No. sir." Another lapse of time. "Did I understand you to say, sir, that you had a wife and six children living .n New York and had never seen one of them "Yes, sir ; I so stated it." Another and along pause of silence. 1 lien the interrogator inquired : "Ilow can it be. sir. that vou never saw one of them Y' " liv, was the response, “one of them was born after I left." "O, ah : and a general laugh fol lowed. ft Iter that the. first New Yorker was especially distinguished as the man who hail six children and never saw one of them. ft hi sham) Ma.ukkt.— A strong minded woman married a man not noted for activity of .body or energy ot character, and before the hnnev moon was over, upon wakening one morning, be found his spouse in tears. h>ve, said ho, "what is the matter ’i " " Dli. I've had such a dreadful dream. “ Why, what was it! " 1 thought I was going up Fourth street, when I saw a sign. Husbands lor sale. ,So many women were rush ing in that I followed, and just then they were selling a splendid speci men for SI,OOO. ” 1 but did they all bring as much as that ? ” ‘n? 11 ’ "° : They went at 81.000, 8000. and so on down. ” ... “ Wel *' did y° ll see any that looked like me ? ’ “ Yes, indeed But they were tied up m bunches like asparagus, and sold for ten cents a bunch. " Tableau.' - RECIPES. I'ish ('ahes.— Take one pint bowl jul of salt codfish picked very fine, and two pint bowlfuls of whole raw peeled potatoes; put together into cold water, and boil until the pota toes are thoroughly cooked. Remove from the fire and drain off all the wa ter; mash with a potato masher; add a piece of butter the size of an esc- • two well beaten eggs ; pepper and salt to taste. Mix well, and fry in hot lard, butter-or drippings,. Do not freshen the fish before boiling. These cakes meet with much favor when ever made. To I‘urify Wohr. —Pulverized al um will purify water, the quantity being a large spoonful to a hogshead ot' water. < 'hie/con Pic. —Cut up a large cliiek en; if it is tough parboil it. Place your crust in a deep, well buttered pudding dish: then a layer of thin salt pork, and on that a layer of chick en ; pepper it; chop up two or three hard boiledeggs, and sprinkle some over the chicken; then more pork. chicken and egg, until the chicken and and half pound of pork is used up; pour in enough*of the water in which it was parboiled to make a gravy; cover with a crust: ornament it a lit tle ; bake an hour, or longer if the pie is very large. Rice and Cant /h ead. —One cup ful of boiled rice ; one-fourth of a cup ful of melted butter ; two large cup fuls of white corn meal; a teaspoon ful of' salt; three eggs beaten sepa rately ; three cupfuls of sour milk, and a small teaspoonful of soda. Stir the meal in the milk, add the yolks, rice and salt, butter and soda. . Beat the whites well and mix them lightly in the batter. Bake quickly in deep tiu pie plates. You can use sweet milk and omit the soda., but. sour is better. Corn Meal Woffles. —The yolk ot two eggs well beaten, one tablespoon fnl of butter, one of' wheat flour, one teaspoonful salt, one pint sweet, milk (or water,) one pint of corn meal, or corn flour if vou have it. is nicer; and la’stly ' tfie whites oV the beaten. Bake in waffle irons'. Beef Tomato Pie. —Cold roast beet cut in thin slices; ripe tomatoes peel ed and sliced. Liue a deep dish with a light biscuit crust; put a layer ot beef, then a layer of tomatoes; salt, butter, and pepper to taste, and so on until the dish is nearly full; put 01 the top crust, cutting a gash in tin center. Bake two hours in a slow oven. Dysentery. —l have known dysen tery in its worst form to be cured after other medicines had failed, by drinking wheat flour stirred in water in quantity of about lmlf a tumbler "1 water, made to the consistency ot cream with the dour. It may he ad visable to add a pinch of salt, or the flour may be eaten in its dry state. — The same ofteet is produced in case of chronic diarrhoea. Out door Whitetouxh —I.— To even four quarts of slackened lime allow one-half pint of boiled glue, a lump of alum about twice the size af a hick • orv nut, and one tablespoonful ot salt with just sufficient bluing to give pure white tint. Out dour Whitewash —11. —Slack lime in the usual way; mix a handle of dour with cold water, taking can to have no lumps; then pour on boil ing water until it becomes like com mon starch; pour it, while hot, in' ol the slacked lime; add one pound ot whiting and two ounces of powdered borax; stir all well together in bucket. Liquid Ghi<-. —A bottle two-thu d* full of the best common glue, and filled up with common whisky; cork up, and set by for three or four days- Fumigation. —To fumigate and cleanse the air of an apartment, we know ot no more simple way than to heat a common iron shovel quite hot. and pour vinegar slowly upon it. 11" steam arising from this process is of a disinfectant character. Open window'* and door at the same time. I’owdei ed charcoal is an active disinfectant-