THE GREEN EVILLE DAILY SUN, SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 11.
The Greenevills Daily Sun
PUBLISHED DAILY EXCEPT SUNDAY.
W. K LYON, EJitor as Praprfelw.
Daily Subscription By Carrier, 10c a week, 40c a saonth.
By Mail Outside of Grteneville 40c a month; 75c for
8 months; $1.50 for 6 months; $3.00 for the year.
Catered at the postofflce at Greeneville, Tenn., as second
No one tells "the whole truth," and who isn't glad of it?
It takes more than a doormat to make you feel "V." el-come."
There is no more certain remorse than that after raw-onions.
If a man is discouraged enough he develops into a
G rouchiness is a barrier against familiarity; and also
This country owes another world's fair to the rising
The sooner liberty bonds reach par the better for ma
and the kids.
Indifference is a restful state of mind, but to stimulate
it is painful.
About the only recommendation of impulsiveness Is
Fomc men can't stand prosperity, but more go down
Fair weather friends are worth while if you shrewdly
recognize them as such.
Small things may "come your way," but big ones won't
unless they're gone after.
The steamship George Washington has made quite a
history as a royal yacht.
Enthusiasm against something is more prevalent than
enthusiasm for something.
One form of boasting about a poker game is to dwell
on how small the stakes were.
We'll put the question again: All in favor of sending
troops to Fiume please say aye!
The psychological moment is the instant you make up
your mind that your soul's your own.
In the darkness of a movie show if you don't like
comics, there is nothing else to look at.
To be a good critic one has to do a good deal of locfinp
or leisurely observation, as he calls it.
It can be said of some men that they "remained yoiinr,
all their lives." They followed the styles.
Is it the bicycle rather than the jitney that is to com
bat the "high cost of living" in street car fares?
Greatest difficulty in setting out "to make others happy''
js the one has to find out their views on the matter.
A ball gown was fifty years acquiring the spangles that
little boys used to see on the beauties in the circus parade
Bad debts on merchants' books are evidence of th
prevalence of the belief that the world owes one a living
Roosevelt wrote a book, "The Winning of the West."
Woodrow Wilson has gone out there to personally see
about the same thing.
If our brief war that only lasted about twenty months
cost us $30,000,000,000, what would it have cost if it
had kept on four years?
Young men may be interested in new styles of silk
shirts as greatly as they are in baseball, but they're no
such topic of conversation.
Viscount Grey, the new ambassador from England,
does not drink. Britain, perhaps, desires him to be
persona grata to a bone-dry land.
People who want somebody to wait on them feel that
this is becoming a dreadfully independent world. A kind
of cafeteria world wait on youiself.
DETERIORATION OF THE NAVY.
The problem of maintaining the United States navy
ought to engage the attention of Congress at this time.
Although it is only a few short weeks since the navy
was performing with traditional gallantry and efficiency
the tasks imposed upon it, the shrinkage of personnel
has progressed at a fearful rate. It is not an exaggera
tion to state that at this moment the Atlantic fleet is a
mere shell, impotent for war, chained to shore for lack
of men. The Pacific fleet was sent out only after de
pleting the Atlantic fleet; and the Pacific fleet is now
dangerously short of men skilled in seamanship and gun
nery. As a broad proposition ' the navy is now incapable of
defending the shores of the United States, much less of
crossing the seas in defense of the Union.
Secretary Daniels returns from the Pacific coast, where
the public exhibited praiseworthy patriotism in welcom
ing the fleet He finds on his desk an alarming number
of applications for resignation from officers whose lives
have been spent in the country's service. They are dis
heartened, utterly discouraged, and with sore regret they
ask leave to quit the service which they love. They can
not exist further on the pay they are receiving, and their
private hardships, together with the rapid disintegration
of the navy's efficiency, are wearing down their spirits.
These are among the choicest products of American life.
They are thoroughly trained, keenly alert and broadly
educated men, acquainted with the world and intensely
devoted to the United States. Their training has made
patriotism their religion. They are in living flesh the
United States navy. All its glorious traditions live to
be perpetuated by them. If they go the navy ceases
What is to be thought of the gratitude of a nation
whose naval captains face the world with 'but the single
old-fashioned uniform in which they stand, with their
pockets empty and their families separated from them
for weary months for lack of a few dollars? These are
the men who warded off death from the millions of boys
who crossed the seas. These naval officers actually
shielded the army with their own bodies, and made pos
siblc the victories of Foch and Pershing. eYt they are
poverty-stricken and in humiliating distress.
Many a lieutenant commander is now supervising the
work of mechanics who receive twice his pay. He re
ceives $10 for a day of 24 hours, full of responsibility,
while some of the mechanics receive 15 and even more
for a day of eight hours, with extra pay for overtime,
some of them making as much as $150 a week. Perhaps
they earn it, in the cheap money that now prevails. But
if they are entitled to such pay, their director, a technical
expert responsible for the work, should receive at least
The shipping board is milking the navy of its seamen
As enlistments expire the sailors go across a pier and
sign up for twice or three times the pay, with perquisites
that are very attractive to them. Thus, the country
seems to be building up a skilled merchant marine, but
it is merely doing so at the expense of the navy, and in
case of war the false policy would be fully exposed.
There are two battleships at the Philadelphia yard
one with 135 men aboard and the other with 165 men
There should be at least 1,000 men available for each
vessel, but the training stations no longer supply men
for the navy. The raw recruits, when there are any, are
sent right aboard ship, where they are as dangerous as they
are useful. At New London there are at least fifteen
brand-new Eagle bouts, lashed in threes and without care
takers, representing a waste of millions. At Newport
the entire torpedoboat flotilla, made up of the finest and
newest vessels in the world, are lying shorn of men,
utterly worthless for defense or offense. In case of
sudden call the Secretary of the Navy would be com
pelled to make known the fact that the United States
is unable to send its torpedoboats to sea. The destroyers
have on board only five men each, not sufficient to keep
The navy is preparing to build batle cruisers costing
tbout $40,00,000 each. They will be magnificent vessels,
abreast of anything in existence. But they will not go
to sea unless slightly older vessels, costing, say, $35,000,
000, each, are stripped of men and convened virtually
into hulks in order to make up complements for the new
The derangement and deterioration of the navy is here,
i menacing fact that cannot be eliminated by fervent
speeches or estactic visions. If the people wish to keep
their first line of defense unimpaired, if Congress wishes
to perform its duty of providing and maintaining a navy,
it is high time that the situation should lc investigated
and ninded. Washington Post.
The Town Gossip f
4 4 4 ! l ! !
u is tne "oraytors" which are always "sounding the
tocsin" that put the country in hysterics. Suppose the
council, lor awhile, refuses to get excited.
Some comic scenario genius must have stolen a march
on the gods when they permitted Gabe d'Annunzio and
Phil Andrews to come to loggerheads at Fiume.
It requires a good deal of travel before a man is so
phisticated enough to Rend his trousers out at the hotel
to be pressedwith perfect confidence that "something
won't happen" to them before they are returned.
OLD WINE IN NEW BOTTLES.
A proposal to put into 3000 churches which have no
pastors a pulpit phonograph, which shall deliver approved
sermons by ordained ministers to the congregation sug
gests that it might be more effective to provide a phon
ograph for each church member in his own home, loaded
with appropriate sermons. This should insure a larger
audience, for a rainy day or an indisposition to dress up
in one's Sunday best would not lessen it.
We leave out of consideration the adequacy of a can
ned sermon to influence the hearer without the personal
magnetism which is so much the essence of pulpit oratory.
We have no data on how many people have been led to
the throne of grace by a phonograph or made to appre
ciate their churchly duties by it, but we cannot be totally
skeptical until thorough experiments have Deen made.
We know that a taste for music has been cultivated
by this wonderful invention and that a knowledge of
languages has been acquired through it. Why should
it not be as dependable to expound creeds and doctrines?
NEXT TO the movies.
OR HAVING my shoes ahined.
THE THING I enjoy mcst.
IS TO go around.
WITH SOME of my friends.
AND ASSIST them.
IN BUYING a hat.
AND I always go.
AT EVERY opportunity.
AND YESTERDAY afternoon.
GENE ARMITAGE said something.
A NEW hat.
AND I told him.
THAT I'D be glad to holp him,
AND WE stopped.
AT RISER'S store.
AND MR. Riser asked us.
WHAT WE would have.
AND GENE told him.
HE WANTED a new hat:
AND THEN he happened to re
THAT THAT was the size.
OF HIS sox.
HE FINALLY got right.
AND TRIED on one.
AND IT looked.
KIND OF dubious.
IF YOU know what I mean.
AND MR. Riser told him.
THAT IT was awfully becoming.
AND SO did I.
AND GENE loked at us.
KIND OF suspicious like,
AND TRIED on another one.
AND IT made him look.
LIKE GUY Verran.
AND DIDN'T suit him.
ALTHOUGH I tried my best.
TO GET him to take it.
AND THE next time.
HE DRAGGED out a green one.
AND IT kind of teetered.
ON THE top of his head
AND I insisted.
THAT IF he didn't take it.
HE AND I would cease.
TO BE friends.
AND HE finally decided.
TO GIVE it a trial.
AND I hope.
THAT I'LL be with him.
THE FIRST windy day.
THAT HE wears it down town.
HE OUGHT to reduce.
ABOUT FIFTEEN pounds.
BEFORE THE winter is over.
I talk all day of divers things, of
pelicans and quinces, of cats and
pterodactyls' wings of cabbages and
princes. With women I discourse of
gowns, with kids I talk of candy,
with kings I argue much of crowns,
with soaks I speak of brandy. It is
the tendency of age to have some
mental hobby, and. on that topic rant
and rage until we call a bobbie. The
man with but a single theme calls
forth no smiles nor chortles; he
makes his hearers wish to scream,
and bores his fellow mortals. One
talks of dead, forgotten jays, whose
records were unpleasant; he drolls of
prehistoric days, and scorns the gol
den present. One talks forever of
his ills, of sinews that are achin',
and he has memorized the pills and
powders he has taken. One ana
lyzes politics, and show3 just where
we're headed, our statesmen all are
tinhorn hicks who should be boiled
and shredded. And all these gentle
men are bores, as are the themes
they're broaching, and men rush
home and lock the doors, when they
are seen approaching. I talk all day
of dogs and cats, of succotash and
sabres, of liver pads and stovepipe
hats, and I don't bore my neighbors.
9 1 Af
m ru n I f 1 1
THE BALLAD OF HUMILIATION
Not all the gold would I claim,
Not with the great would I be;
Lord, as I whisper Thy name,
Hearken, I pray to my plea,
Grant but one avor to me
Teach me to live to this rule :
Keep me from ridicule free,
Spare me from playing the fool!
Spare me from the blushes of shame
Madness demands as her fee;
Spare me the censure and blame
Ordered by Folly's decree;
Grant me the wisdom to see
Clearly through life's milky pool;
Let my good sense never flee,
Spare me from playing the fool!
Cast me for roles that are tame,
Ship me, if need be, to sea;
Keep me from glory and fame
But leave me no sad memory.
Let me not stand one, two, three
In the classes attending life's school
But grant me this one guarantee
Spare me from playing the fool.
Lord, now I ask on my knee,
When the heat of excitement shall
Ntt to think of myself shamefully,
Oh, spare me from playing the fool!
V C . : n
Nl m y T s
I THANK you.
If you know enuff figures you can
start at 1 and keep on counting till
you get tired of sumbody elts does
and tells you to shut up. The only
fgure less than 1 is 0, being so mutch
less that nobody dont hardly ever pay
eny attention to it. The more O's
ycu put in a row by themselves, the
'ess use they arc.
Wen peeple counting backwerds
come to 0, they know they cither haff
to stop counting or start forwerds
agen. This is its cheef use.
Figures is very usefill in helping
peeple to tell time. Enybody can see
ware the hands of the clock are, but
they cant tell wat theyre doing there
unless they know the diffrent figures.
A persin that dident know figures
could wawk thru a store full of clocks,
and wen he came out he would haff to
ask sumbody wat time it was. 1
If it wasent for figures you would
ent know wat page of the book you
was up to. If you subtrack the num
ber you are up to frum the number
on the last page, the anser will be the
number of pages you still haff to read,
in case enybody asks you.
Some of the things you do with fig
ures is add, divide, subtrack, multi
ply, carry, make mistakes and forget.
Some of the best peeple at figures
are the werst peeple at sumthing elts
This proves theres allways room for
Fracktions are hard dubble joint
ed figures thr t its no use trying to do
on your fingers. They are so easy to
make mistakes in, its a wonder peeple
Peeples shapes is allways known
their figures. Bowlegged figures are
the most intristing to look at, the
most unpopular to have, and the most
impossible to change.
Oh, the sighing winds of autumn
And the sere, the yellow leaf
Only fill me with forebodings
Of a not far-distant grief.
For they solemnly remind me
'Tis a thought to chill the soul-
That ere long I may be paying
Half my income out for coal.
On Tuesday, Sept. 30th, 1919, I
will offer for sale my forty acre
farm, all my farming tools, house4
hold and kitchen furniture, 12 head of
cattle. B ildings on the farm, 10
acres in timber, running water, good
springs. This property is located in
the 18th district of Greene County, on
Cove Creek, on good rock road
Joins two churches and school house;
two stores close. Will be sold to
the highest bidder.
TERMS: One third cash, balance
one and two years.
SAM HOUSTON, Owner.
Mr. Harvey Painter was a caller on
Horse Creek Friday morning.
Mrs. W. M. Painter called on Mrs.
Lillie Swatzel Friday. .
Mr. and Mrs. Lillie Swatzel and
baby are sick at this writing.
Mrs. Dezza Broyles, Miss Daisy Mil
ler and Miss Eunice Bowman called
at Forest Hill school Thursday.
Mr. James Waddell spent Saturday
and Sunday with Lome folks from
Mr. R. R. Painter made a business
trip from Chuckey Friday afternoon
Mrs. Vergie Fellers and children
and Mrs. Tennie Dunbar called on
Mrs. Charley Swatzel Friday afternoon.
Mr. and Mrs. Ross Burgner and
child were out motoring Saturday
Mr. Blaine Carter called on Miss
Jane Waddell Saturday evening and
Mr. and Mrs. LeRoy Broyles were
recent business callers to your city
Rev. Tom Brumley filled his regu
lar appointment at this place Sunday
Miss Maud E. Cox spent Sunday
with Mrs. Charley Alexander.
There will be a bean shelling at
Mr. Cloyd's Wednesday. Let every
one go and help shell beans.
Mr. Robert Williamson called on
Miss Hassie Mitchell Sunday after
noon. Mr. Brumley dined with Mr. and
Mrs. Vivian Love Sunday.
Mr. Dewey Waddell and Miss Tex
ie Painter, Mr. James Waddell and
Miss Mae Painter motored to Pleas
ant Hill Sunday afternoon.
Mr. Russell Reaves and wife and
Mr. Spencer Reaves and wife motored
to Cedar Grove Sunday morni'ig.
We were veiy glad to see the nice
The only objection to i' was that it
shower of rain Saturday evening.
didnot last long enough.
Miss Daisy Miller spent Sunday in
Mr. and Mrs. John Roc and Mr. W.
M. Miller, wife and two , little boys
were out motoring Sunday morning.
Mr. Billy Hensley and brother,
France Hensley, were out breaking
a young horse to the buggy recently.
J PROFESSIONAL :
DR. W. T. MATHES
Office Bohannon Bldg.
Hours 8 to 9 a. m.; 12:30 to 3
p. m.; 7 to 9 p. m.
Both Phones at Office
Residence, New Phone 227.
DR. H. M. TAYLOR
Dr. L. E. DYER
Physicians and Surgeons
Offices Bohannon Building, Main
Office Hours 8 to 9 a.'m.; 12:30
to 3 p. m.; 7 to 9 p. m.
Night calls. Both phones.
DR. E. C. DONNALD
Office Over Square Drug Store.
Office Hours: 8 o 10 AJ1,
Ito 4 P. M., and 7 tc 8 P. M.
Leave day calls at Square Drug
Night call J. S. Bernard's res
idence or call Frank Gass' residence.
W. T. MITCHELL
Justice of The Peace
Office, Basement Mason House,
O. T. FRENCH .
Justice of The Peace
Matrimony a Specialty.
Office over Hardin Grocery Ce.
Opposite Court House.
O. I. LANE
Constable and Collector
I do a general collecting business
and pay all accounts through the
Citizens Savings Bank. 1 earnest,
ly solicit a share of your business.
References Any buttaess firm
NEWTON C. MYERS 4 SONS
Meadow Valley Farm, Greene
Polled Short Horn Cattle..
U. S. Government and State Tu
berculin accredited herd. "Dia
mond Archer," X18366, S. H.
780646, a rich bred roan Scotch
bull at head of herd. The ma
trons represent some of the lead
ing families of this great breed.
See our exhibit at the Greene
Our Cheap ColumnJ
Little Advertisment in this Column 1
Will Bring Quick Results On
Cent a Word.
LOST: Bunch of keys on silver
chain. Finder return to Sn office'
and receive liberal reward. 126.-tf
CASH FOR OLD FALSE TEETH:-
(Broken or not) We pay $2.00 to
$35.00 per set. Also actual value
for Diamonds, Watches, Bridget
work, Crowns, Old Gold, Silver
and Plath.um. Send at once and
receive cash by return mail. Your
goods returned if price is unsatis-i
factory Mazer Bros., Dept. eJ
2007 S. Fifth street, Philadelphia,
pa- 2-148 t. f.
FOR SALE: Two Ford cars; road
Midway, Tenn. 154-6t
FOUND: A black pig,- weighing
about 25 pounds, about two months
old. Come to my house about two
weeks ago. Owner can have same
by calling and paying for this ad.
FRANCIS CRUM, 18th district.
FOR SALE: At once, Used Tour
ing car. See Bacon-Dickey Motor
WANT INSURANCE? SEE S. B.
BRANCH MANAGER WANTED by
old established Chicago Concern.
We furnish full stock of goods, ad
vertising matter, and equip store
completely, in good location, all
at our expense. We allow you to
draw out $175 a month and will
also pay you a liberal share of the
profits your store earas. Work may
bo started in spare time. No in
vestment or previous experience
necessary. If you are a hustler
and want an opportunity to make
$5,000 or more a year, we want
you, and will pay you well for the
start. Send your application to
day. S. Levy Manager, Dept 739,
329 Si Franklin Street, Chicago,
WANTED: Girl to do housework.
Good pay. Apply at Hotel Brum-;
LOST: Buich of keys. $2.00 re
ward if returned to Sun office.
Schedule time of passenger haine
. leaving Greeneville, Tenn ,
The following schedule figures pub--
iisbed as information and not
SOUTHERN RAILROAD I
Westbound. Est (bound.
4:20 a.m.. .Mem.-Wash.. .1:36 a.m
7:02 a.m..Knox.-Bristol.8:06 p.m.
11:26 a.m...N. Y.-N. 04:59 p.m,
4:59 p.m...N. Y.-Mcm...9:56 a.m,
6:09 p.m.. Knox.-Bristcl. 7:39 a.m.
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