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,'=.Vi •v.? I pf" "#§381 .j g&tr i|^^ 8»^» i:*:irj'A 'Mm #8TvS»T'- S.-4"1- £-*rw^"1fcSL''' & Jy WALTER'S PA AS A DRIVER. My pa lived on a farm when he Was just a little boy like roe He used to drive the horses there Crost railroad tracks and everywhere. pne"Sunday pa he said: "I guess I'll get a horse to-day, and le's 3o buggy-ridin", fur away, And take Cur lur.ch, and stay all day." \t first ma didn't like to go, Because the horse might cut up so But pa said: "Pshaw! They'll be no harm, 'Cause once I lived out on a farm." A.t last ma she give in, and then She dressed the baby up, and when Pa brought the horse and buggy, ma Said: "Now, be careful, won't you, pa?" "Oh, pshaw! Don't be afraid," pa said. And told the horse to go ahead. The baby was behind with ma. And I set up in front with pa. The horse went decent till at last A notty mobile scootin' fast Come tearin' down the road as though It was wound up and had to go. The horse stood up and pawed the air. And something seemed to make pa's hair A11 bristly, and his eyes—oh, gee! But they looked queer, it seemed to me. His face got white, and then he said To me, a whisperin': "We're dead!" But we got by at last, and then The horse behaved himself again. When we were home ma said she knew That pa would know just what to do. She said she knew they'd be no harm, "Cause pa had lived out on a farm. And pa he held his head up high And said "of course," and that was why He took us out to ride, because They'd be no danger where he was. wonder if God loves folks who Pretend they don't do what they do. And when you're seared enough to die And don't let on, is that a lie? —S. E. Kiser, in Chicago Record-Herald. S RELAXATION OF CAMERON KENT CAMEKOX S KENT had been brought up by a most fashionable mother and a host of elder sisters on the pruns and prism plan. From a so cial standpoint he was an entire suc cess. He always arrived at a din ner, dance, of theater party on schedule time he was prompt in his payment of party calls civil to every one present, but impartially bestowing his attentions agreeable to any assignment never sent his regrets and never appeared bored. In view of such desirable qualities, it was not surprising, therefore, that iie -was in great demand. He was the standby of hostesses, the delight of chaperons, the hope of wall flow ers and the despair of mammas with eligible daughters. In addition to these accomplish ments, he was bestowed with good looks and a good income was pol ished in manner and well informed, yet while every woman admitted that he was desirable, not one had lost her heart to him, until Cissy Na igne came out. She immediately an nounced to her elder brother that she thought Cameron Kent a "howl ing swell" and that with a very lit tle provocation or encouragement she could fall in love with him. "Better not, Cis," replied her broth er. "Kent is a confirmed old bach elor. Besides, you'd never hit it off with him He is as cut and dried as an old maid. He keeps a set of books all neatly dated—engagements, calls made, calls to make, list of indebt edness to pay, list of invites, etc. He has a ledger and a day book, and goes over them each day, checking, balancing and making entries. Now how do you think that kind of a man would regard you, if by chance he should see your top drawer?" "I should always keep my top drawer closed," said Cissy, pertly. 'I like a systematic, orderly per son, from contrast, I suppose. I think beneath his veneering of con ventionalism Cameron Kent's heart is-ali right." "But if the veneering is on so thick that you can never reach his heart, what difference docs it make as to its quality?" "Oh, no one has tried properly to remove the veneering," replied Cissy. "And I suppose you think you can— a little upstart like you, \vhen all the belles of the season have jailed?" laughed her brother. "Yes, I do," replied Cisssy^ "That is, if the environments are favorable Tf I could meet him in some uncon ventional or Bohemian way, or if he and I were the principals in some little adventure—" "Well, if you depend on those cir cumstances, you're a goner, for Cam eron Kent is always on guard. You'll never .find him an inch out of the prescribed path. He is too much of a veteran to be caught by an adven ture." "Then he'll be getting rusty by this time," said Cissy, sagely, "and he won't be a match for active, young brains just out of school, but maybe the fates will be good and arrange things for me without my plotting." The season sped on and Cissy con tinued to meet Cameron Kent and re ceived attentions from him in the same measure that others had, but lier admiration for him continued and increased. One day about four months after her debut/she issued invitations to a dinner dance, and, of course, Cam eron Kent was first on her list. "Cissy Navfgne dinner dance," he entered in his notebook. "She is a "*ice, original little girl, decidedly in- M* 'teaim teresting for a bud." and thought no more of her until he consulted his book on the date affixed to the entry in his book. Then, immaculately attired in con ventional evening dres-s. he betook himself to the Xavigne residence at the prescribed time. He was ushered into the drawing room, which, to his utter surprise, was unoccupied by guests or hostess. •'Could I have mistaken the hour or date?" he thought, but rejected such an event as impossible. Presently Cissy entered the drawing room. She wore a dark skirt and shirt waist her hair was in school girl fashion. Her involuntary ex pression of surprise was but mo mentary and quickly concealed as she greeted him, but it told him that his surmise was correct, and he had made a mistake in the date—the first time in his life he had been guilty of such a blunder. He resolved not to confess his stupidity. He would merely make a formal call and then take his departure. But he was reckoning without his hostess. "Oh, Mr. Kent," exclaimed Cissy, "you can never guess what I was about to do when you came!" "Indeed, I cannot," he replied. "Well, you see, papa, mamma and Walter have gone out. I didn't think anyone would be likely to call to night, and so I had just gone down into the kitchen to make some old fashioned molasses candy. The cook is out. and I have full sway. I never will have such a good opportunity again. Don't you want to come down and help me?" Anxious that she should not discov er his blunder, he was willing to obey any commands to atone for his shortcoming. He expressed his pleas ure at the proposition, and together they sought the kitchen. "Your attire is not in keeping with the place." she said, laughing "be sides it's terribly warm here. I'll for give you if you remove your coat. I am in my shirt sleeves myself, you see." He not only removed his coat, but allowed her to tie a kitchen apron around his waist._ Then he heartily entered into the spirit of the occa sion, poured the molasses into the kettle and helped to grease the plates. "I was right," thought Cissy tri umphantly. "He has adaptability. It's only because his lines have been cast in social places that he has been so proper." The making of the candy took a great deal of attention. They bent over the kettle and anxiously dis cussed the length of time it should boil. She showed him how it must be done to a hair, and when he finally insisted it was "haired," they turned it into the plates and set it out to cool. There came a distracting mo ment when Cissy took his hands— one at a time—and greased them. "Think of Cameron Kent with greased hands!" She laughed softly and triumphantly to herself behind the pantry door. Then what a pull ing time there was. Cameron Kent proved as dexterous at this new em ployment as he was in leading a cotillon. Poor Cissy got hopelessly entangled in her strand of molasses, which threaded and parted in every pos sible way. Cameron cut up his long rope of candy, which had attained the desired shade of whiteness, into little bits, and then proceeded by the aid of butter and patience to extri cate Cissy from her supply of mo lasses. In the midst of this occupation Wal ter Navigne returned and appeared upon the scene. "I say, Cissy! Whatever are you up to?" he called. Then he caught sight of Kent and stared at that individual in amaze ment. Cameron, however, was not at all disturbed by the encounter. "Halloa, Navigne!" he said cheerily, "do you want to help us pull candy? You'll find some in a plate on the re frigerator." "There seems to be plenty on my sister's hands, too," said Navigne pointedly. "Yes, but I have the first claim to that," was the response. "I am nearly iamished," Walter de clared. "Aren't you going to "serve anything but candy, Cis?" "If you will open negotiations with the coffee pot, Walter, I will see what I can do in a sandwich way, when my hands are at liberty," re plied Cissy. Presently the three sat down to a very palatable little luncheon spread •upon the kitchen table.. "Don't forget the dinner dance to morrow evening," said Cissy to her "formal caller" as he was taking his departure. "I haven't forgotten it," he said earnestly. "Well, you got Cameron Kent to come off hia perch all right," said Walter to his sister. "However did you manage it? I would have given a great deal to have taken a snap shot of him, coatless and aproned. I guess you sized him up all right, Cis, after all. How did you *VPX bring it about?" "He came to make a formal call and I happened to be making candy," she replied demurely. The next evening as Cissy stood jn the drawing-room receiving her guests, her heart sank as she saw Cameron' Kent approaching her -tvith his formal air of exclusive elegance, "Has he gone back into his shell again," she sighed. He had not. He held her hand eight seconds longer than was his wont and asked her if she was sure all the molasses was removed from her hands. At dinner he sat at her left. Afterwards he led the cotillon with IT} f" +oo, VjisSps* her. This was his recognized posi tion. The buds always opened their cotillons with Cameron Kent, so her choice made no comment. "May I assure you," he said when making his adieux, "that your even ing has been most successful and that 1 have enjoyed myself immensely." "1 am glad that you have," she re plied conventionally. Still he lingered. "May I also tell you that I enjoyed myself even more last evening and ask for a repetition of the program, say Friday evening?" Cissy's eyes danced with mirthful satisfaction. 'I very much fear," she rejoined, "that that is the evening cook re ceives in the kitchen and I really have no right to appropriate her pre cincts. But we might practice on fudge in the cliafiing dish." The fudge evening found him as mellowed and unconventional as the molasses one. Cissy's brain were fer tile in devising and carrying out schemes that brought herself and the now deeply interested Cameron Kent into tete-a-tetes and informal meet ings. Lento:i season afforded them scope for the indulgence of uncon ventional functions. Then came spring when his fancy already more than lightly turned to thoughts of the supreme passion. Before early summer had passed Cameron Kent had won and wooed Cissy with all the ardor of an impul sive young swain who had never been a victim to society's iron-clad rules. Under Cissy's influence he grew al most unconventional, and, profiting by his systematic and methodical habits, her top drawer became a thing of order. The courtship was brief and happy —their honeymoon a time of bliss. One day when they were recalling the past and he was trying for the hun dredth time to locate the exact mo ment that' he lost his heart to her, he finally declared thajt it was when she was greasing his hands on the night of their famous candy-pull. "I never thought that -I really knew you, as you were, until that night," said Cissy. He began to laugh. "I shall have to, tell you some thing. It seemed a terrible thing for me at the time, but looking back ward, it strikes me as being very funny. You see I had a great many engagements, and so I was in the habit of jotting down place, date and event in-Si memorandum book I kept for the purpose. I am naturally ac curate, and I never made a mistake in my dates, but I got your dinner dance noted a day in advance in some inexplicable way and when I came, as you thought, to call that night, I supposed that I was coming to the dinner dance until you came into the drawing-room in shirt waist attire. I determined to make a formal call and depart-. In my confusion I ac cepted your hospitable invitation to accompany you to the kitchen." There was a silence. Cissy did not laugh and tease him as he had ex pected. Finally she said: "Cameron, I thought it an awfully good joke at the time, but since I've felt like an artful, designing person in keeping silence so long. I have been calling myself an imposter—I, have a confession to make." "You know what confession is good for," he laughed, "so 'fess up." "Cameron," she said earnestly, "I put the date in your invitation a day in advance of the others, and planned the candy pull and all, so I could meet you informally and get acquainted with you. Do you think that was awful?" His laughter was good to hear. "But tell me, Cissy, you little con spirator," he said presently, when he had assured her that the scheme was a happy thought, "why did you want to meet me informally and get ac quainted with me then? Did you really like me?" "Oh, Cameron," she sigheu, "a year before I came out I thought you the most stunning thing I ever laid eyes on, and I could hardly wait for my debut to meet you. If you hadn't fallen in love with-jne, I should have gone into tha convent." "Bound to wear a veil in either case, eh, Cissy," he asked lightly, but with pleasure shining in his eyes.— News Orleans Times-Democrat. Satisfied His Cariosity. The English papers tell of a young Parisian in London, visiting the "Chamber of Horrors" at Tussaud's. Being alone he was seized with an impulse to put his neck in the lunette wherein had rested that of Marie Antoinette. He lay down,: touched a spring and closed the collar. But how was he to release himself? If he touched the wrong spring the fatal ax might descend. Before long a crowd of visitors, led by an atten dant, came on the scene. The guide was a bit of a linguist, and saw an opportunity, with himself as master of the situation. He at once began a practical lecture on the guillotine, interrupting his remarks with little asides in French to the indignant vic tim, asking him to scream louder or writhe more agonizingly. "How well he acts!" exclaimed the gratified on lookers. Finally the Parisian was re leased, and, answering the applaus with maledictions, fled.—New Yori Tribune. Paternal Affection. A capital story is told by a popular bishop well-known at the East for his work among the poor there. A costermonger was in great trouble, lie had just lost his little son and the good bishop was seeking to con sole him as well as he was able, when the costermonger suddenly looked up, and in a broken voice, and with tears streaming down his cheeks, said: "D'ye think I could get the young beggar stuffed?"—King. wlk1 COLOR IN THE SOUTHWEST. Those Who Have Seen It Say There la "o Bine Like tbe SUy of Ariaona. The desert is gray and white and yellow, a background which intensi fies the red shirt of the cow-boy and the blanket of the Indian. The land scape of red and ocher also brings out all the blue there is in the sky, writes Maxfield Parrish, in Century. Titian did the same thing how fond he was of placing a tan-colored figure against his blue skies, a contrast which, no doubt, helped to make his skies the marvel they are. In the southwest your face is always lifted up, looking into air and space and freedom and day after day th"? skj ib clear and blue it is always with you, and you see more of it than ou ever saw before so no wonder \ou say there is no blue like the skj of Arizona. But it is not the intense blue of New England it is a pale blue, and there is a heaven-full of it everj day and night. When you see a bare red Arizona mountain a long way off, the blue and violet and purple of it seem like the work of magic. Put such a mountain in New England, put it over against the east in a clear sunset glow, and it would be more startling than in Arizona. But we have not such mountains here, and Arizona has not our atmosphere capable of giving color to the dingiest object. However, she has great local color, and great distances to change it into many tints. Afield of alfalfa is the most brilliant of greens the vermillion fly-catcher is a comet in the sky—he positively glows like a light, he is so brilliant. One has to stand on the rim of the Grand Canon, look across at the other wall, 13 miles away, and watch it at sunrise or sunset, in order to see color which can exist nowhere else. At the beginning or at the end of the day the great forms of which the walls are made cast their most wonderful shadows. They are so far off and there is so much air in be tween that the light and shade seem unreal, like a mirage which you know will vanish in a little while. The low sunlight falls on the red towers and spires, and causes them to glow as though a light were within them, like great thunderhead at sunset and thousands of feet down into the chasm falls the shadow, a blue from dreamland, a blue from which all the skies of the world were made. DRESS OF THE CONTINENTALS. Nondescript "Uniforms" of the Men Who Fonitht for American Independence. a In "The Krologrue of the American Revolution" in Century, Prof. Justin H. Smith gives the following descrip tion of the "uniforms" of the Ameri can soldiers at the capture of St. John's, in Montgomery's Canadian campaign: "All the besieging troops were on foot in the best attire they could com mand. In the three Connecticut regi ments no uniforms were visible ex cept as officers here and there had chosen to provide themselves, or a pri vate wore the dingy old coat that had done service at Louisburg years be fore but graduations of rank were shown by colored ribbons. Plainly dressed though they were, the men looked formidable with their big mus-. kets, the barrels four feet long minus two inches, the bore three-quarters of an inch in diameter, and the gleaming bayonets 14 inches in length. "Beside them stood the New York troops. Weeks before, Capt. Living ston had described the dress of his men: 'Some of thein Save waistcoats, others none some trousers, others none some hats, others without some ragged, others whole and probably things had' not improved much during the wear and' tear of the siege. But they all had regimental coats, at least, distinguishing the regiments by the color of the facings and Montgomery declared that somehow they had ac .quired the look of regulars. There, also, was Capt. Lamb with his artillery, all in blue and buff, and that of a finer quality than the infantry had, as be came, an elite corps and, yonder, a squad of the Green. Mountain Boys from Longueuil, dressed out in green with red facings, and such strapping fellows that the New York provincial congress had to order all their coats made 'of large size.' Behind them shone the tents of the soldiers and the offi cers' marquees .-while the vast pines of the forest made a somber but magni ficent background." lUi Affinities Never Sadden. There is more of ideal love and mar riage in the world than it is the fashion to believe. Affinities are not so rare. But they are made, not born. After all, what are affinities? People between whom attraction is developed to a max imum, who think and feel and act in entire sympathy. It is improbable that two people eonld meet and discov er a bond of perfect sympathy. Such a condition would be too good and great to gain without a struggle. No two people have the same training and ed ucation, 1iie same environment, the same conditions for the formation of character and inclination. We must make our affinities —Cosmopolitan. Sabbath Observance In Scotland, As an instance of the observance o] the Sabbath in Scotland, an English pa per tells of a postman having a rout* between Stirling and Blairdrummond He was observed to ride a bicycle his six miles on week days and to the same distance on Sunday, and wi asked why, replied that he .was not lowed to Use the machine Sunday investigation followed, and the man's explanation proved to „e»t S colored, CCCS.IVO, P» W$&. StraigiiT to the Sp THOUSANDS PROFIT^BYTHE FREE OFFER OF DOAN'S KIDNEY PILLS AND GET CURED. Aching backs are eased H^ back an loin paius overcome. Swe ling Sifpl&'S&eSS Si", licftrt p«lptati.D, sleeplessness, headache, nervousness. Tfil Citt. Isd.-I received the free trial of Doan's Kidney Pills. They arc snlemlid. I had an awful pain in my back on takiu" the pills the pain left, me right away and I feel like anew man.-Stephcu Schaefer. Mrs. Addie Andrews, R. P. D. 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The artist by and by discovered that he had lost or mislaid his rubber eraser, and, is he wished to correct a slight error in the sketch he went up to the door and asked the farmer's wife if he might have a small iece of dry bread. This as every artist nows, makes a good eraser. The farmer's wife looked at him with an sspression of pity not unmixed with sur prise. "Dry bread!" she repeated. "Well, I uess you won?t have to put up with any ry bread.from me, young man. You come .•ight into the kitchen with me and I'll give you a thick sfice of bread with but ter on it." "Now don't say a word," she continued, raising her hand to warn off his expostula tions. "I don't care how yon came to this state, nor anything about it all I know is you're hungry, ond that's enough for me. You shall have a good dinner." "NORTH COAST LIMITED. Every Day In the Year. The Northern Pacific Railway take pleas ure in announcing that their popular over* land train, the "North Coast Limited," will be continued during the winter. This broad vestibuled, steam heated, electric lighted train, with its model ob servation car, equipped with the most mod ern conveniences, such as parlor, reading and writing rooms, library of choice books, supplemented with the latest magazines and illustrated papers, buffet, bath room, barber shop, and card rooms with stand ard Pullman and tourist sleeping cars (the former with two berth lights in each sec tion), as -well as handsome day coaches, guarantees the traveling public service be tween St. Paul, Minneapolis, Duluth and Fargo, Butte, Spokane, Seattle, Tacoma and Portland absolutely unrivaled. Two through trainB daily between 8t. Paul and Portland, supplemented by the "Burlington's" Special, running daily be tween Kansas City and Seattle, via Bil lings, is the rdost complete transcontinental passenger service now offered the traveling public. Chas. S. Fee, Oen'l Passenger and Ticket Agent, St. Paul, Minn, Lost In the Park. A man had been absent for some time, ®.nd during his absence had raised a pretty luxuriant crop of whiskers, mustache, etc. Un returning home he visited a relitive, wL°se little girl he was very fond of. lhe httle girl made no demonstration usual 8 hun with a Times® kiss. rSL¥?,!5°W^'"!" The T»«" 8pint iDt0 -R! of ja- route lond. over walk and when al An post be cor- WONDERFUL RESULTS PDn.1 FREE TRIAL OF THE *5" GREATEST KIDNEY MEDlX Post-offlco- Extract as was "Why, child," said the mother, "don't yon give Uncle Will a kiss?" 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