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THE, BEfii JUNIOR BIRTHDAY BOOK. , This is he Day We Cglebrate Are Blonde Girls to Disappear? The King of Hearts Copyrisht, 191 1. Nattaul Km Aamaatsm. By JM firinMey THE BEE: OMAIIA, FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 22, 1911. j The ee e Blonde have a SO per cent better chance than brunettes to marry." Lady Briareroft "Fair girls are Impressionable, tweet and trusting, and make a stronger appeal to men.' Dr. W. J. Gomersall. "I found of English women per cent of brunette were married: only fiS per cent Of blondes. The race Is being made dark by selection. Men marry the dark g iris." Dr. Beddoe. "So fond were the Romans of golden kalr that flatterers called dark women. In compliment, 'honey colored. "Lucre tius. "The Greek and the Roman women bleached their hair; the American, the European, and the Bouth Pea Island women do now." Auerbacker. "There is scarcely an old master or en Old poet who haa painted or sung a dark woman. Helen of Troy. Dante's Beatrice. Milton's Eve. all the madonnas, all the angels. were blonde." Wlnckelmann. "Fhakfspeare had but - two ' bMnde women In all bis plays. The brunette baa it Inst come Into popular favor. The brunette today Is more popular than the blonde Her beauty la superior, more re fined, more lasting. "Henry T. Finck. "The blonde type Is doomed In America She Is parsing away Ilka the snowa in the) sun's heat, tf she cannot develop a dark akin to protect herself she must succumb." Surgeon Major Charles Wood ruff, U. 8. A. Gladstone, Adolph de Candoll. Dr. Bnddoe, Walts, and others show the blonde type Is passing away In Germany, Franca and England. In Oermany, one the home of the type, only 31.8 per cent are now pure blondes; In Austria, only 19 T per cent. A student of this subject, writing In the Chicago Tribune, asserts that In ancient times the blonde girl had the pick of all - the princes and knights, while her dark sister was doing tha best ahe could with bank clerks and motor car conductors. In the famous paintings of the old mas ters there are not ten of women with black hair. Titian left only one portrait of a brunette, or at leaat af an open and admitted brunette. The Romans showed their preference for tha blonda type by tha quantity of yellow German hair they Imported. Tha angels of the old paint ers axe all blondes. Only tha devil was painted black. Dr. Beddoe examined tha first 728 woman of pure type he could find In Eng land. Of this number, SS9 were brunette and 867 blonde. Ha holds the theory that tha English race Is . being darkened in eolor by selection. Men marry the dark women. Gladstone, years ago. made the statement that tha pur blonda type was dying out. M. Adolphe da Candolle, a French auth ority, declares tha blonda type is disap pearing in that country. In Jarrold, It la aald of England that aa lata as Henry VIH'a Una that the predominating type waa red headed. This Is certainly not the ease new: In Germany, according to Waits,, tha pur blonda type which waa almost universal hi tha middle ages, it fast dying Out. In Germany, Switseriand, Belgium and Austria an examination was recently made of almost U. 000, 000 school children. The result was that In Bwitser t land the percentage of pure blonde chll ' dren was only 1X1, In Austria it was 19.79, and In Germany MS. In some places the peroentaga of pur brunettes had reached aa high aa 25. This, be It remembered. In the very home and cradle of tha blonda races. If the yellow-haired, blue-eyed girl is becoming more scarce and harder to find every year It would appear to be unques tionable that In time she will become a rarity, and as such valued above all other things. FRIDAY, September 22, 1911. School. Saunders .Lothrop . Fsmam .Saratoga Ed-. Rosewater Lake ..Pacific Year. . .1901 . .1908 . .1901 . .1908 . ..1904 . .1905 . .1908 Central 1S9T Name and Address. Robert Ady, 418 North Thirty-ninth St. Richard Armstrong, IMS Spencer St. Walter Anderson, 3136 Chicago St Harry Bendorf, 1501 Sprague St Dorothy Bowman, 3115 South Sixteenth St. Jesse Brown,. 2422 Burdette St Margaret Blind. 110S South Ninth St Ileen Brodkey, 432 South Twenty-fourth St. Mable Baumwart. 3412 Evans St Druid Hill. . ..' 1902 Marcia E. Chris. 4031 Wirt St Clifton Hill 1902 6elma Chapin, 3111 South Thirteenth St Edw. Rosewater . ..1904 Earl Dumond. 3705 North Eighteenth St Lothrop 1902 Lucile Dennis. 3157 Farnam St High .....194 Richard Duffy, 1018 South Twenty-fifth St. ..... Mason 1896 John Edgeller. 2625 Franklin St Long 1898 Hazel Goodman, 2430 South Fifteenth St. Castellar 1900 Minnie Glvens. 620 North Fourteenth St Caas .....1898 Alice A. Goodson, 117 North Fortieth St Saunders .1902 Ruth Grabbert. 2017 Dorcas St Caatellar 1906 Jessie Johneon, 2209 Clark St Lake 1900 Willie Keholm. 2224 North Thirteenth St. Lake ...... 1901 Hazel Jones, 2508 Vinton St... Vinton ......... 1895 John Lewis. 2814 North Nineteenth Ave ....High ...1894 Harriet C. Llllis, 812 North Forty-second St Saunders ...1906 Vilidie M. Muchllnekl, 42 K St., South Omaha St. Phllomena 1898 John Meyers, 2909 South Twenty-fourth St Vinton ......... 1895 Martha T. Miller, 3325 Parker St.. Franklin .......1897 John Malloy, 225 Francis St Train 18 Hulbert McFarland, 2501 Farnam St Central ..1904 Charlie McCauly, 2417 Poppleton Ave Msaon ... 1902 Walter Preston, 101 South Thirty-fourth St Farnam ........1902 Fred Petsol, 1009 South Sixth St... Pacific 1887 Val Parcell. 2421 Dodge St. Central .1903 Lawrence Roeslter. 2S06 North Twenty-second St. .Lake . . 1898 Marie E. Skow, 2322 North Thirtieth St Howard Kennedy. . 19C0 Elsie J. Schmidt, 316 South Thirty-sixth St Columbian 1900 Sarah Steinberg, 1019 Harney St ..Pacific .........1899 Alta Spear, 1414 Jones St Pacific ...... .,...1898 Lester Shane, 2530 California St High 1898 Loula Smith. 2422 South Twentieth Ave Castellar 1901 Clarence Wells. 223 South Twenty-ninth Ave High : 1895 Lettie M. Wagner, 3502 North Twenty-ninth St Howard Kennedy.. 1896 Frank Zallnsky, 2921 South Twenty-sixth St......Im. Conception. ...1898 A baby's hands hold the heart-strings of the home In which he is always kin? Loretta's Looking Glass Held tp to a Man's Df to I '$ n-fl bl ik? ill - " i i i sp sssj i. i - ... ys ! ... ii a. i .1 ip ii i hi .i f Judge Barleycorn BT DAMON aCNTOS. . fd ' Old Judge Barleycorn he presides over the District of Down and Out; Jurisdiction beyond the Poles, and a little of Hell, I have no doubt. Maybe the warden's books don't show, but the warden knows that his job was born Out of the District of Down and Out and the jurisdiction of Barleycorn. THE WEEKLY BUMBLE BEE VOL. 1. OMAHA. SEPTEMBER 22, 1911. No. 255. THE BUMBLE BEE. A. STINGER Editor Communications welcomed, and neither signature nor re turn postage reu,uird. Ad ores the i.ditor. NO BAD MONEY TAKEN. NO ADS AT ANY FKICE. 'Dead Madame. I suppose you are not writing for men, but you are beans read by one of them at least. I have bean seeing under your attacks on the faults of (iris. Tou seem to have got next to the fact for which neither man , nor woman is to be blamed or credited that the man and the woman are each essential to the other. And if they fail to harmonize each will suffer the torture that oomes with unfulfilled possibilities. Nature or Ood fixed things so. Tou are just try rig to make stria see that their double-dealing- hurts their chances tor self-fulfillment. You must feel pretty sore when they come back at you as If you were moved by mere feminine malice. But keep at it. Soak 'em! Fan 'em! Roast 'em! Take a tip from Hamlet when he says he must be cruel only to be kind. And, when you get tired of playing missionary to your own sex, light into us. 'Til bet more than I did at the aviation meet that you can soak us a few that will leave us dripping. I can't help but think it takes a good deal of selt-reatralnt on your part aometlmas to keep from putting over a knockout blow for one of the man. Tou have a cinch on the fact that a man is a mean to an end in the develpment of a womn. Tou've got your , feet set on a piece of the elemental foundation. Bully for you, I say! May they never slide off. even if the girls squirt cold water all over you and make your footing slippery!" Mr. Man, you are quite right. My sei has no appropriation oa the fallings peculiar to human nature. But let some male mentor rlae to deliver your , kind from their particular and aggravated forms of human nature. I have all more than I can attend to la acting aa a Joan of Are for girl. Nice, polite ladlee have been cautiously calling attention to tha faults that cheat girls of their rights without making any very decided change In the dishonesty and alllineaa with which girls treat vital Interests which are men so I opine that a good and vigorous at tack will be of more service. No. I don't feel "sore." If did I should be incapacitated for future use fulness. The martyr attitude la onu which I have outgrown. When a spite ful retaliation cornea to me. I know 1 have hit hard and gone deep. And I be lieve that I have set the wheels of le formation In motion. t have a lot of respect for a girl who has energy enough to get mad! Tou can count on It, she haa the energy to do something. It's these lackadaisical creatures .who are so smugly indifferent to the deviltry they praotioe that they never get up steam enough to resent an accusation who make me "sore." Thanks for your good advioe. Theae ladles I shall soak till they are dissolve! I shall roaat they till they bound and bounce on the grill! I shall pan them till they what Is "panning?" I cannot think what a terribly "panning" person would do. Rut whatever it is they should do, I will try to make them accomplish. If soaking and roasting and panning Induce the kind of misery which loves company, I will begin on the men! And. In the intense mutual sympathy and understanding caused by their suffering, I shall have effected the harmony between men and girls which is my aim. There are more ways to make a mule drink than by drowning him. BaSBBSBSBS "Zounds" 'Good morning. Mr. Schneiderpopski," exclaimed the god lady of the house es the new second flosr tck took his place at the breakfast table. '3oot mor-r-rnlng. replied the musi cian, bowing valiantly. "I am so afraid ;roi ulJn't pass a com fortable night,' pursued the noatera, sympathetically. "Can we do ai'ining for your Not kooraf citable? Me!"' .xc'tlmed the long-haired one. "Ach. , I alep' like se humming bird. I was oil rite. Joost before I go to bed 1. br-rctle mlt meln feedle " "Oh. was that It?" Interposed the hoat sa with- a look of -Ld relief. "I'm so pleased. . W thought you were shifting the bed." Answers Autauiu. This is the first day of Autumn. The fact is referred to mere ly as indicating that the cal endar says summer has gone. It doesn t make any dufei ence how you feel about it, or what your thermometer says, summer is ended. And it's nearly time. Talk about winter linKenng in (he lap of fcpring'. Nothing like tho way tiuiimiet- hung on was ever witnessed in the urinals of the VVeatbtr bureau and that a (nine annals. Hummer didn t commence officially until the Hist of June, but as a matter of tact It commenced about the middle of April and it stuck on clear up to the I'mit, and worked a little overtime at it. (so we're glad that Autumn is arrived, burning leaves and tiagy say. golden sunshine, glorious atteigiow In the even ing, mornings that tell of the the mystery of existence, fool ball, pumpkin pie, Ak-Bar-ben and tne general election are some of the attributes of Autumn. And this is the first day of Autumn. Economy. The members of the city council are surely economical, no matter what othea may say. Each meeting night the janitor puts a nice new box no matter what others may man s desk not a stingy peny box, but one of the real kind. And when the meeting is over, each councilman takes hia box along home with him, ao that it won't be wasted dur ing the week. If this isn t real economy, we'd like to know what Is. . OMAHA STIERED UP Weather Man Wins a Guess and Canses Great Excitement. Much excitement prevailed in our midst on Wednesday. Excited groups of men were seen on the streets and else where, and the talk was con tinuous, as each accosted the other and recounted what he had noted. In the busy marts of trade tile rush slackened while man spoke to man, and woman to woman, and each whlapered or shouted the news. Something of importance bad occurred. Only an event of the utmost general lntsrest could have so disturbed the community. The astonishment of everybody waa evinced, and yet ail seemed to accept the condition as inevitable, not undertaking to ascribe a rea son, nor to suggest any method for averting the eventuality. The truth waa too apparent to escape, and so the people submitted with a sense of fa tality that left no room for doubt. RAI.V FELL. The weather forecaster had at last had a guess come true. Enough water actually fell from the sky to da4iien the ground on the surface, and a base ball name was postponed on account of It. This fact had some bearing on the prospects of the Omaha team for win ning the Western league pen nant, and consequently added to the general excitement of the day, but only as an in cident. Rain really fell in Omaha on Wednesday. Lather. The city council having backed away from it. and the police court having decided that the tonic covers the whole case, lather may now be mixed in Omaha on Sun day with Impunity, and water, and the barbers who do not care to do It can enjoy watch ing the other barbera who are not so particular. Jauket. One nice way for the city council to have settled the junket row would have been to send the whole outilt on the trip. The city woulj le quite aa well off without is with them. Well r You'll notice that Mayor Jim's name is conspicuously absent from the news col umns that deal with the pro ceedings of the city coun cil In these pre-commlssloa days. Peeves. - One might almost reach the conclusion that Lee Bridges isn't at all pleaeed at the thought of Fred Cosgrove going to Atlanta. CITY HALL MYSTERY Bumble Bee Reporter Es tablishes Identity of a etraaare Visitor. A mysterious stranger put in appearance at the city hall Thursday. "Do you not know me?" he asked of City Clerk Butter. "Yea, I do not know you." responded the rotund Daniel, and he went straight ahead looking out of the window. "Alas." sighed the stranger, "how soon we are forgotten," and he strolled down the cor ridor. "Hello, Fred." he aald, bursting in a door, "how are you, and how are ail the folks?" "The folks are well, thank you," answered Comptroller Cosgrove, "but I do not place you." "Sad. sad is my fate," ru minated the visitor, and he made hla way to the elevator. George Ablin paid no attention to him other than to secure his request to be taken to the mayor's office. "Howdy, Jim," was the greeting with which he sa luted the mayor, but a digni fied, frozen smile was his re turn. Jim recognized him not. So he turned and went down stalra, avoiding the ele vator, and waa making his w'ay out of the bulldteig when the lynx-eyed reporter for The Bumble Bee saw him. "Hello," he said, "ain't you the man who was going; to put In some public comfort sta tions in Omaha?" "I am." said the stranger, "but no one around here tenows me now." and he faded among the crowd on Farnam atreet. Poller. If all the meetings to be held in the "open school house" are to be like those at tha board rooms in suDDort of tha proposition, maybe It will be just as well to keep the cnoois Closed. Answer. Purpose Maine had gone dry by 2 would it have been a vindication for the eternal principle of prohlbitloa? Settled. At any rate. Mike Harring ton knows just about where he stands in the estimation of Brother Leldy. Kle. We'll soon be hearing from the goose bone and other in. fallible weather slgna. Maybe. Maybe If Fred Cosgrove nadn t been ao fresh in fir ing a lot of the Lobeck patriots out of hia office, he wouldn't have had so much trouble In getting the expense appropriation. Hellef. The announcement from Washington that Governor AWrlch is not a candidate for United States senator brought some relief to Kearney and H old res e. Reward. Our pet little weather maker has had hla reward. We knew he would win If be only stuck to It long enough. . u aid rvs OUR POETS' CORNER. Echoes. There Is a thing distresses me: I wonder what aits F. B. T. The cosy corner where be chirped. Like joysome cricket, was usurped On Friday last by paltry prose, At which my very gorge arose. "Tho melancholy days have come. The saddest of the year," by gum! When mute, inglorious, Milton-like, This bloomln poet takes a hike To some deserted rural lane Or, mebby, he's some whores raisin' cane But The Bumble Bee drones idly on, Tho' its ginger and Its sest are gone And F. B. T. may have gone to take a Fresh supply aboard from far Jamaica And this may be the echo of that scream Of a joke about our base ball team. Q. R, O. Cheer I n. When you feel as If you're busting. And you don't know what to do. And your enemies assail you I Till you're almost cut In two Then say. "I do not care a rip i But III keep stiff my upper , lip." When you feel that you would I give tne world To have a friend or two. And wonder why It was that you never had one true Then cut out asking why of every little thing Tune up yourself, old fellow. And Just begin to sing. When the clouds are awful black. And thick aa they can be: In haste pick up your fountain pen And mark them C. O. D. For the mall box in Inferno Then you'll be happy try and see. eeeverr. Now I swear by Curio's shiny Pate. The story I shall here relate la strictly true and no to date. By your leave, I introduce the villain A base ball man by name of no on I en Got hurt in a wreck and made a ktllin'. Don't ask me Just how much he cot Of course I could tell, but I'd rather not He proved a Johnny on the SDOt. Let us go ahead with the tale a bit; That afternoon he seemed oulte fit I saw him make a three-base hit, r. B. T. Old Judge Barleycorn he's severe; Misery bis bailiff, and Woe hla clerk; ' Draws bis Jurors from Fathers' Sins; capable men for tne judge's wor. Maybe the warden's books don't show, but the warden's wise and t. un derstands Ninety per cent of bis people coma from the Judge's district and the Judge's banda. Who are tha witnesses? Rise and stand! Alcohol, in a dull brocade; Wine, and Women, and a bad old Song pass to the deck In a sad parade. Wbo the attorneys? Death for the State; Teara for the prisoner all for lorn (No defense from the prisoners' dock goes In the court of Barleycorn!) 3 El ii The warden credita them "Judges-Thls," "Judges-Tbat"; however styled. He knows full well the sentences cam long before the charge was filed. Blood on their hands and blood In their hearts; haunted by fear and con science torn Maybe the warden's books don't show, bat they come from the court of Barleycorn. r Mixed the Texts J it is related that a clergyman living in the suburbs set a tired-looking man who had applied to him for work digging potatoes. In an hour or so the went out and found that the man had uncovered about two quarts of the tubers. "Well," said the parson, "you don't believe in overworking yourself, do you?" 'Oh," replied the laborer, "I work ac cording to scripture.'' "Where in the Bible csn you find any thing that Justifies your taking an hour to dig two quarts of potatoes r "Why this: 'Let your moderation be known to all men.' ' The minister thought this rather witty and he took the man to dinner. The moderate worker did not prove to be a moderate eater; in fact, he cleared the table. I "You don't seem to eat according to your text." remarked his host, watching the viands disappear. "No." replied the tired man, plying hia knife and fork faster thao ever. "I have another text for this: "Whatever thy hand findeth to do, do it with all thy might!" "Humph!" said the clergyman. "My good man, you've got your two texts misplaced." f Great Salt Mine 3 A mine was discovered In the district of Le. Pas. Bolivia. In MM), from which the silver was cut with chisels. The great salt lake at Obdorsk. Siberia, is nine miles wide and ssvonteen miles long, yet except In a few places it i sol idly roofed over wtih a leposlt of salt, which is becoming thicker and thkl.er each year, says the Scientific Anie Usn. About the middle of the last tntm v salt crystals first began to gather upon tha surface of the water. Year by year, tnlrg to the evaporation of the water, the crya tals became more and more numeous, and then caked together until this great roof was formed. In 1I7S the v.iter be neath this salt crystal roof found an un derground outlet into the Obi river. 1 his lowered the lake's surface about three feet, leaving that distance oetweea tha water and the roof, and each year this distance haa been diminishing by the con stant addition of salt crystals to the toof. Many springs surround this lake. Their wster flows oves the roof and tvaporates there, and h.. continually adds to Its thickness. AVr many yea.s the springs will probably become ci oked wlt'n their own deposits, and then the whole will te come covered with earth, so that a great salt mine will be formed a treasure tor the Siberians hundreds of years to come. Gauls in remote times dressed In skins, tattooed their flesh, drank out of the skulls of their foes and treated all stran gers as their natural enemies. Clvlllxa Uon among them began In HOu.