Newspaper Page Text
i iHidmminiTniinnin j,
TIE Ul'iJG: OMAHA. irKIHAr, JLJN& U, Tm OMAHA DAILY BEE 3FOUNDED OT EDWABD rtOaBWATEIt VICTOR noaBWATER, EDlr6li BBS BUILDING. FARNAM AND 1TTH. Entered at Omaha Tostottlee as second class matter. TKIIMS OF SUBSCRIPTION; Runday Bee one year... Baturdav Bee. on rear 1-52 -rv.u n. without ftundav. one year, w gjaiiy Bee, ana Sunday, om 6.00 Evening and Sunday, .per month... -..c Kvenlnir, without Sunday. Pr month o Datlr Be. Including- Sunday, per mo, bo Dallr Be, without Sunday, per mo, ,.450 Address alt complaints of IrrtRUlarlUM In dlivir to City Circulation Popt REMITTANCE. . Remit by draft express or P8"1!' parable to The Bee Pub leMnf company. Only a-etnt lUniM received In pay ment of small account. Personal checks, ex cept on Omaha, and eatttrn exchango. not accepted. omCKS: Omah-Th Be bulldlhe. south Omaha SMI N Street ... Council Bluffs-14 North Main street. Lincoln- IJttle building. Chlcafco-Wl Hearst building. NewVork-Room 110R. S Fifth Ay. Bt. IuIb-W3 New Dana of Commtrc. Washlngton-TS FourtsenthetiJijyj, Communications relating to news ana editorial matter should be addressed Omaha Bee. Editorial department. APRIL CIRCULATION. 50,106 Etats of Nebraska, County of OJv.gM.Mi Dwlcht Wiliuims. clrcutaUon marker of The Be Publishing company. bel duly sworn, says that the averaK dally circulation for the month of ArlL "1J, Ml M.104. DWIOHT Williams. Circulation Manager. 8ubcrtba tn mr presence and sworn f befor me tWM ! S- r ovary jrwwi (Seal) nbecrlbera lea-rlnsf tbo city temporarily ahould hnve TU Be tanlled o hn. Addres -will b c&and as often eet. Democrats and the Philippines. Advices from Washington, say that President Wilson will soon Bubmlt to congress a proposal for dcflnlto plans upon which tho United States may get ready to quit tho Philippines. It is said the prwldont looks for littlo contention over tho disposition of tho Islands, Inasmuch ns the demo crats are bound by n party platform to euch action. It is of Interest to note Just what the platform has to say. After condemning: this govern ment's ocoupatipn of tho Philippines, It proceeds: We favor an Immediate declaration of the nation's purpose to recognize the In dependence of the Philippine Islands as soon a a stable government can be es tablished, such Independence to be ituar- anteed by us until the neutralisation of the Islands can bo secured by treaty with other powers. But President Wilson has not yet indicated Just when he believes "a tabid government can bo estab lished." Tho American government never had any other Idea In the Is lands than that It would establish fttablo conditions there and give the largest moasuro of self-government as soon as possible. Tho republican national platform of 1000 declared: Our authority could not be less than 6ur responsibility. The largest measure of self-government consistent with their elfare and our duties shall be secured to them by law. Surely our government has kept faith and surely no one will say that the United States could have met its responsibility if it quit the Islands and left them to their fate at this time. Wo hereby nominate Doc Dlxby Hfor poet laureate of England. ' Tne Mexican peon, wj aro told, Is 3azy, but proud. Proud of what .pray? When the rains' aro plentiful and -the home team wins, life Is worth ' No more gambling games at the CBtreet fair. That lfl The Beo'a ultt- snatum. JTha dove of noaco may be still peon soaring above us as If it in fended soon to tight. 1 If our visiting editors wore not thoroughly enjoying thom.olvos, they1 wore mighty good actors, We ask to know Just how stopping the kins', horse from winning tho Derby will briug votes for womont Tkee impertinent taxpayers Bhoutf know setter than ask foolish quftwoas of the Water board com nodwe, Business and Pleasure. The meeting of tho Nebraska edi tors, Just concluded in Omaha, In vites attention to tho problom of tho proper admixture of business and pleasuro at such gatherings. Tho one and only complaint heard, and that not a very loud one, was that the social and entertainment features wore Interfering too much with the business program. If Omaha is to bo the model con vention city, and to play host to a constant 'succession of societies, as sociations and conventions, it muBt try to do its duty and furnish recrea tion pleasures that fit in with tho main purpose for which tho meeting la held, and the same principle that should control for one convention will apply to all. "AH work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" holds good, here, but tho play can be ar ranged so as not to Interfere with tho work. LM Angeles is euro-enough a wide- kwak town. A Jury's -vordtot was rtcefttly et'Wda there tecawea jwer snored during the trial. r Tm New Orleans Picayune speaks of "Senator Raaadell's Brave Blow for Sugar." The wind On tho other Bide ia getting strong, though. Since ho got his oyos glued to tho fat Jail-feeding gqMt our democratic reform Bheriff seems to have forgot ten, everything that savored of re fcxra. ' i ' U they had only had that lobby investigation down at Lincoln about threa months ago tho catch would taw been bigger, although probably fchlefly smalt try. i ' ', Pace Plus X has Just celebrated kla aeventy-elghta birthday anniver sary deaplta the fact that a lot of folka got ready to go to his ftlneral several months ago. Mtae. Bernhardt ia quotod as cay, fug it is not impoMlble that she may cm& back. Certainly no one will kuBt that, a the haa spent th6 latrt jtweaty years at coming back. Now Vlco President Marshall is feeraJiieel aa the other man tn high sip "public life who never took a drink ef whisky ia his llf6. What, not jsyen on tho doctor's prescription T I Denver has our commiserations JDmaha once wont through the expert ence of; a city ball barricaded by out going officials trying to hold over against successors bearing fresh com jnlssioaa from tho people. The W4ter board'e troubled 'waters wqujd be at least measurably calmed by announcement of the oft promised reduction of rates to centa per 1,000 gallons. Gentleman rrhat are you waiting fori 1.1. LOOKUK litis di BackWard Omatii COMPILED OOP (, ' " ittumatm 'ROM DEE, riLES ? OOP .TUKB O. Thirty Yeara Ad A persistent rumor finds 1U way into print that a syndicate of English capi talists aro buying up land just west of Summit on the tine Of the Union Pacific, and that Phil Armour of Chicago Is as sociated with them, and that when tho deal Is consummated, Immense stock and slaughter houses will be constructed. R. 1. Hchaller Is the Omaha man known to be Interested with the syndicate. The Omaha A Northern railway has been Incorporated by S. II. II. Clark, general manager of the Union Pacific, H. It House, Frank Murphy and B. W. Nash. RAlph W. Breckenrldge has been elected a member of the Omnha Glee club, which Is gathering all the good material of the city Into Its ranks. Ira Hlgby, for som time past United States gauger In this city, has accepted a position as day room dork at the Paxton. The appointment of "William Irving as general purchasing agent of the Hurling ton at Chicago is announced. J. 8. Brady of St. Joseph of tho firm of McCord Brady ft Co., of this city, is registered at the Millard. M. Hellman and Albert Cahn have gone to New York City. The finder of a silk nacque lost On Eighteenth street, between Chicago and Farnam. will be rewarded by leaving the same at Henry Lehman's, 1118 Farnam. Hon. Oeorge Canfleld and Mrs. Can- field returned from their Cuming county ranch. Twenty Years Ago kit. ana Mrs. Charles Mets, baby and nurse, went to Chicago to take in th World's fair. William Qyger left for the east, to re turn In July. E. W. Osffood. manager of the Mors Dry Goods company, returned from tho east. Dr. J. C. Campbell, attendant physician to General C. H. Van Wyck, wrote: "The general Is Improving right along. We apprenend no relapse." W. A. Runkles, of The Bee. who. with W, 0. Boyer, of the World-Herald, waa to represent the Omaha Typographical union at the International convention In Chicago, left for that city. Mr. Boyer to follow tho next day, Major and Mrs. Furay, Hon. George M. Humphrey and wife. Major Paddock. Mr. Goodell, Dr. Ludlngton, M. J. Ken drlck and son, left ftfr St. Paul to at tend tho convention of the Loyal Legion. J. A. Tuthlll, secretary and manager of the New Omaha Jockey club, an nounced that, inasmuch as an old fashioned celebration of the Fourth of July was contemplated this year, he proposed formally opening the affairs of the club on that day with some nifty tit tle races and things. Twice Told Tales So Loner, John. "Hello, John. Whafs new?" "Hello, Jim. HoWsltcomln'r "All right. How's yourself?" "Purty fair. Lots of rain we're gettln'." "SUre. Seen the papers today V "Naw. Anything In cm?" "Naw! Say, them English suffragettes Is sure raisin Cain, ain't they?" "They sure are. Glad It ain't struck this country." "You're rlsht Still, mebbe they got some cause to act that away." "Mebbe they have. Still It don't mako much difference to me ono way or an other." "Mo neither. Jf my wife wants to vote, let her vote, I say." "Sure; let her vote." "Still, you can never tell." "You said It, Jim." "Well, s'long, John." "S'long,"-New York Sun. What Happened, "Are yoif the man who writes all this Joyoun advice about scattering sunshine and giving everybody that seems worried a glad hand and a word of encourage ment?" "Yes," said the man with scarco hair and Inky fingers. "I am oho of tho pro fessional optimists who do that sort of J;hlng." "Well, I'm not going to suo you for damages or false pretenses or anything of that klntt I just want to let you know that I tried to heed your lesson. I went to one of our great cities and tried to sicali words of oheer and comfort to the overburdened souls that I saw rushing past mo." "What happened?" f "Before I had cheered up four people I got arrested for being a confidence roan." Washington Star. Told the Troth. The poor old delinquent was dragged up before his honor again. And when the judge looked at him he shook his head pityingly. "What am I going to do with you this time?" he mused. "Lcmme off, your honor," begged the prisoner. "Let you off? Why, I ought to give you a life sentence. You are up before this court about ones a month, as I remember It." "No, sir. I ain't been up before your honor, for more th'n a yearl" "If that is true. I'll be easy with you. How did you manage to keep away from hre for a whole year?" "Your honor gimme twelve months tho last time." Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph. GtDox Hoist by Its Own Petard. Los Angeles has elected as mayor by a handsome majority ovor the municipal conference candidate tho man running Independently with tho full socialist support. It seems, in fact, that tho socialist voto. deter? mined tho contest. It is 'not an in considerable factor in Los Angolca, ns was proved by Job" Harrlman, who, as tho socialist candidate; was. a very hard man to boat, oven though handicapped by tho incubus of hav ing been a legal defender of tho Mc-Namaras, For several yoars Los Angelos has boon ruanlng the gamut of reform experimentation. It haa perhaps outrun nearly every other Amorlcan city in this regard. A hotter, moro scientific and purer municipality was its laudable objective. It has overlooked very fow schemes, fads or devices of civic management In Ua quest for the ideal. Yet, as these election returna Indicate, and as other sources of Information con firm, tho not result is the spread of socialism aa the1 manifestation of a spirit of increasing unrest. "And this spread of socialism is not con fined to tho unthinking and poorly- to-do claasoo," says a Loa Angeles business man. "It is surprising to see how many of our respresontatlvo citizens have been caught up In the vortex of the wind." PosBlbly the success of tho inde pendent-socialist candidate may be but a eano outcome of tho erazo for chango and innovation. Let us hope so and watch and see. Ton Years Ago James Walsh, who was to manage the Nebraska agricultural exhibit at the St. Louis World's fair, announced some of the plans for assembling and handling the display. Ono thing he announced waa that Nebraska was to have the best exhibit there. About SCO Baptists, of Omaha gathered at tho Commercial Club rooms for a re union and banquet Some of tho speak ers were John H. Daniels, Rev. B. F. Fellmnn; X. W. Carpenter, Mrs. Charles M. Eaton, Dr. W. H. Christie. John A. Cummlngs, Elmer D. Wlers, John R. Webster. Rev. John W. Conley, Dr. Ed ward a. Wormsley. Major J. R. Buohanan, formerly gen eral passenger agent of the Fremont, Elkhorn ft Missouri Valley railroad, with headquarters for many years In Omaha, was In the city on a visit, having but recently left upon retirement. Ho was planning the construction of a new home at Waukesha, Wis. Llssie Wright brought suit for J15.000 against the city of Omaha to compensate her, as far as possible, for injuries sus tained when she fell during the winter at Fifteenth and Spring streets. Mrs. F. W. Judson and daughter Were visiting In St. Paul and Minneapolis. Editorial Viewpoint 1 "Why Gantt the lawyers have chance at making the laws of this country? Of the ninety-six members of the senate only seventy-four are lawyers. Of the 434 house mem bere it i vorse yet, for only 290 are lawyers. ' gftafctor Norrls defines a lobbyist ks a perasa'not a member of a legis lative body who attempts to influ ence or eostrol legislation at the seat of government Those old-Umo "petitions" in "boots" then were sothtng but organized columns of lobbyists. ' Boosting Farm Land Values. Iowa state officials are said to have decided on a general Increase of farm land valuation for taxation. Iowa landB may be undervalued by the assessors, but nevertheless the. Announcement serves to remind us of the complaint qutto generally voiced against the tendency to In flate and overrate land values. Iowa, one of the richest states In the union is one also that failed to make any considerable net gain in Us popula tion by tho 1010 census and Iow&ns offer aa one reason tho largo efflux of farmers, especially young men of restricted means, In search of Cheaper land in newer states and Canada, The census shows that in many o! the mU-west states the elsea of farms have increased at the ex pense of the number of farms. This, too. has 'been laid at the door of high land values, to some extent not, of course, entirely. It would seem, therefore, that aside from the purposes of taxation a general rals InK of land values has Its draw, backs as well as Its advantages. Disputing the word of all the ex PTt prophets of social reform, Miss Jmn McrsVu, daughter of the late U. P. Merman, says the minimum sage has nothing to do with a girl's feteraltfy. In the meantime it may, slogan must be changed 4a Ho fcara to raise tie general level the Garden of Bden" must be the pt wow' raM, cry, An expert on dress and hygiene has been telling a Missouri legisla tive Investigating committee that people will show physical and moral improvement when they wear fewer clothes. That "Back to tho farm" "Back to People Talked About Pittsburgh Dispatch: Colonel Roosevelt makes It plain that the big stick Is not used In Ma beverages. Chicago Inter Ocean: Mr. Bryan wants every nation to agree to count ten before hitting the other fellow. New York World: And to think that during the Roosevelt administration vari ous officials and official bodies took years trying to settle the question. "What Is whisky?" Washington Post: Llfo Is a succession of troubles. Just as we are on the verge of finding out all about whisiiy, some one haa to complicate matters by starting a controversy on "What Is a Julep?" Indianapolis News: Do not. however, be over sanguine. It Is extremely douc-t-ful If that lowering of the tariff on diamonds, aa proposed, win materially affect the price In favor of the ultimate consumer. Baltimore Amorlcan: Experts aro now turning their Inventive attention to the evolution of the crowlesS rooster. When that feat Is accomplished they might next try conclusions on the back-feneeless cat. Cleveland Plain Dealer: A Baltimore woman has Just applied for her seventh divorce. This Is not noted as a piece of news, but meroly to show Hopper and Goodwin that they can hever catch up with thu procession. Boston Transcript: "On top was placed a sprig or mint, so tnat tne leaves dan gled about temptingly. Beside this he ar rayed A wedge or two of orange or pine apple," And this salad Is what they call a White House mint Julep! Seventy-six varieties of grape- Jalce have been sent to Secretary Bryan at Washington, for sampling purposes ana endorsement. Tho collection Is not in tended as a reminder of the crime of '78. Congressman Bowdle of Ohio wants the Importation of hook and eyes prohibited and their manufacture in the United States made a crime. Holy Smoke, why can't a congressman leave his family troubles at home? William Bchnarr of St Charles, Mo., and a younger brother, Carl, met for the first time In their lives the other day In St Louis. Carl Is 53 years old. He ar rived from Germany for a six weeks' stay with relatives. William left Ger many a year before Carl was born. The stork visited the home of Nathan Valone, a Pittsburgh merchant, recently and left a baby girl which weighed four teen pounds, This Is the twenty-sixth child to be born to Valone. Sixteen, came by his first marriage and ten by his sec ond. Forty-nine years as teacher In the public schools of Chicago Is the record of Harriet N. Wlnchell. She Is tho old est principal In years of service on the sohool staff. Is stilt hale, hearty and happy and proposes to round out her fiftieth year. Miss Duncan, chairman of the West Ham (England) Board of Guardians, was appointed Justice of the peace recently. This Is the first time a woman has been appointed to such a position In England. An act recently passed empowers the lord Chancellor to name as Justices of the peace for the purpose of Issuing certifi cates In lunacy cases the chairman of any board of guardians. While a number of men were wrangling over the postofflee appointment at Park Ridge, a suburb of Chicago, it was awarded to Miss Katheririe M. McClem ents, who was the only applicant who did not have a petition with hundreds of names asking for the office on the ground Of political affiliation. Uncle Daniel Sugg. S3' years old. at tends school regularly In the town of Kookcrtnn, N. C He owns a farm of ISO acres. When he was young he, could not go to tcnooi, out now. Having tne means, he Is determined to make use of the op portunity- His neighbors are making- no Over the Seas TJie ITnhnnoretl nnit Vnsnnit, OMAHA, Juno 6. To the Editor of The Bee: The action of our city commission tn awarding a medal to S. Slotky for his service In notifying Colonel Hartmann of F6j-t Omaha of the tornado is a com mendable one. The vote of thanks to Colonel Hartmann and the naming of a street after him Is also to be com mended. While we are In this medal and thank business, let us be fair to all the heroes of that awful night Watklns Wolfe, a boy of IS years of age. lives at 5111 Martha street In the Ruser park sec tion, where the storm first struck Omaha. In a few moments afterwards he. was astride his white-faced pony and made a two-mile dash through the storm to the Hansacm park pharmacy at Park avenue and Woolworth street, and rushing In, told the story that aroused many to action. Watklns Wolfe should have a medal. The messenger boy of the pharmacy darted out of the store to the residence of M. S, Qreevy, a block away, and repeated tho Wolfo story of the storm, Its havoc and death. This mes senger" boy should also have a medal. M. J, Greevy, a man of mature Judg ment and quick presence of mind, quickly crossed the street from his residence to Mayor Dahlman'a home and aroused the mayor with a repetition of the Wolfe message. He should have a medal. Mayor Dahlman, himself, spent tho e tire night, the next day, the next night all night, and In the next week, day and night, as tho battering ram between Omaha and the world at ' large. He should have a medal. The members of tho police department, the fire depart ment on duty that night are also en titled to 'medals to commemorate their faithful work. Colonel Fetterman, Inspector general of the Nebraska National Guard, spent the entire night getting out the -Omaha troops. He shcfuld have a medal. The policeman that plowed his way through Bemls park to notify Colonel Fetterman Is entitled to a medal. Tho chauffeur, Smith, of Mayor Dahlman'a official auto mobile, was one of the real heroes of the night and should have a medal. The sisters at the Sacred Heart convent, al though the convent was badly wrecked In part, were found to have given away all their food supplies to the needy. They should havp medals The men of the Nebraska National Guard, who came so quickly and patrolled the tornado strip, are also entitled to medals. All along the five-mile path of th tornado through the city can be found heroes, unhonored and unsung men, women, boys and girls who should be remembered with medals. The newspaper reporters that told the story to the world so quickly and accurately, and the pho togfraphers that waded through the de bris and snow with their cameras should be remembered with medals. Let us be fair In this medal and thank business. FAIR PLAY. Desslcatlon op Cremntlon. OMAHA. June 5. To tho Editor of The Bee: I notice In The Bee a letter that strongly favors cremation. Tour corre spondent has certainly struck the right chord aa far as sanitary system of burial Is concerned. In the past necessity has driven- those that were anxious for the welfare of the living to' cremation as the sanitary system of burial. Frances Wil lard, who In her heart detested tho Idea of Incineration, yet ordered her remain cremated. This was done on account of her Intense Interest In the welfare of the living. I presume that had the Rose Hill cemetery completed Its mausoleum she would have preferred destlcatton to hav ing her body dovdured by fire. As your correspondent states the. grave ought to go, and It will go. Ground burial with Its attendant perils both to the dead and to the living Is doomed. We have noticed lately a red-hot discus sion In Washington, D. C. concerning cremation. It was found that those who advocated this movement run up against sentiment and religion. I may state that when you run against these things you come against a stono wall that cannot be surmounted," There certainly Is a bet ter way than that described by Colonel Wolcott In his book, "Old Diary Leaves,' which Is In the public library. This de scribes the first cremation- in the United States, and those Interested In the matter Should read this article. In Chicago and other places east they have found that desslcatlon of body In a sanitary above- ground sepulture Is better than cremation, and the same end Is obtained. IL L. P. Tho new wireless record Is 8,000 miles. The naval etatlon at Newport caught messages from Argentina. Divers aro now equipped with a tele- phona so they are at all times In com munication with the surfaco. An electrically driven talking and mov ing picture maohlnoihaa been Installed in four theaters in New Tork. A wireloss station is beinft Installed on Juan Fernandez Island-mado famous by the story of Robinson Crusoe. The farmers in Ottawa, Canada, have co-operated to bring in an electrio trans mission line so they can tap on and se cure cheap power and light. Wireless train dispatching Is to be tried out on th,e Lackawanna between. Scranton ana Binghamton. Each train will be equipped with a wireless outfit. ' The first telephone was exhibited at tho Centennial In 1876. It was hardly noticed by tha visitors until the emperor Of Brazil picked It up and Was surprised to hear It talk. , Wblle the production of steel In electrio furnaces Is not yet large, statistics show a steady Increase In tho output through out the world. Germany and Austria, the United States and France being the most active. V new Invention which melts linotype metal, by electricity Instead of gas has been given a trial at the government printing office. It Is stated that the process handled the day's melting without a break and turned lout solid Blugg. The cost of melting by electricity as against gas has not been given out but there Is ono distinct advantage In that no gas fumes are to be contended with. Italy raises one-sixth of the entire European corn crop. Turin Is the Italian center for the manufacture of motorcycles, with seven factories, having together an output of some 1,500 machines. ,n The estimated increase In the cost of commodities In Japan, particularly In Toklo and Yokohama, during the last year was approxlmf Uly 6 per cent. A new Asiatic cable will tw laid from Aden to Hong Kpng M Columbo and Singapore. It will be 6,000 miles long and will cost 15,00000(1. Tradition pava , that King Salomon's pearls were from Ceylon and tho phenl- cians came to those coasts for them. The earliest mention of pearl fisheries In Ceylon occurs In the Rajavall chronicle, S00 B. C. The cutting of queues by the Chinese has greatly stimulated the hat and cap business In Japan. At the same time, however, the Increase In Japan's sales to the United States, particularly tn imita tion Panamas, has byn very rapid. Stories in Figures There aro 2,(90 certificated aviators In the world. Over l33.t00.C0Ci are on deposit In United States postal savings banks. Japan's -national debt Is Jl.ni.HJ.OOO with annual Interest of J70, 877,000. Over 4,K Scots left Glasgow the other day on the way to new homes m the United States. The United States makes enough paper money each year to reach twice around the world. The amount of capital invested In the electrical business in tho United State Is In the neighborhood of J5, 000,000,000, The Increase in Imports into Japan from the. United States for 1913 waa un precedented, being upward of $12,000,000, or M per cent over the previous year, making the total more than tSS,S60,CCO. Not since the formation of the German Muffled Knocks Patience Is a virtue In woman. In man it la laziness. Any woman who has raised children gets sore every time she sees a chicken incubator. When a 10-cent man has his life In- uid for 1 1.000 he feels so Important that he c.ti hardly get his hat on. Eomov men overwork their conscience ito mucH that the blame things get so hoarse tcy can't use their Voices, At eveiy wedding there are too many nut plckii and finger bowls among the presents, and not enough can openers. When father is elck and can't eat any thing, mother takes a day off and cooks him aU sorts of nice things to eat When a man announces -that he was driven to drink you will notice that thera U no chance to drive him away from it A woman always Insists upon her hus band wearing what she selects. But If he tried to dictate what Bhe should wear the would raint ana nave mm arresieo. Solomon gets credit for being the wisest man In the world, and he married M0 or 00 good-looking girls. Yet If a man mar ries two of them nowadays he Is sent to Jail for being a dummed Idiot A man will spend an hour In a saloon telling the barkeep all about the rights of man. freedom ana personal uoerty. And when he gets through lndiKnatinx he will eat a handful of coffee beans so his wife won't know he has been drinking beenClnclnnatl Enquirer. Electrical Progress A I.onnc-FVH Wnnt. Indianapolis News, It Is all right enough for the .vice presHent to keep a box of candy in his desk drawer for his boy and girl visitors, but what the "boys" want is for him to arrange so that the pie will be readily distributed. LINES TO A SMILE. "That illustrator Is much behind the times!" In what way?" .... "Regariess of the Iscusnlon that has taken place concerning beyerapres. he In sists on representing Miss Democracy with corkscrew curls." Washington Star. Bacon: "I understand your friend only earns ab6ut J3CO a year." Egbert: What afe you talking about! Why. he gets about J3.000 a year, 'fra not talking about what h s gets, but what he earns. H6's got a political Job, hasn't he?" "Time fllos."remarked tho mah who never says anything original. "Yes," replied the blrdma.li, thought fully; "I wonder what would happen to tho universe It Time were to break a propeller or get Into an nlr poCKct. Kansas City Journal. "Understand me sir, I cannot live with out your daugnter. . "nm ,inn'i vnu misunderstand what i wnnt to know 'Is where you iarv intend tn iivn after vou are mX rled." Detroit tFtee Press. I see where the British mllltaAt suf; fragettes are cutting telephone wl.3: , Well, one would thlhk their natural sympathies would make them spare the telephone." "Why so 7" "Because the moro Amorlcan. telephone talks."-Baltl- B0Y AND PUP. Life. The boy wears a grin, A scratch on his chin. A wind-rumpled thatch, A visible patch, A cheek like a rose, A frccklesome nose. The pup. though he may Be tawny as hay. Is blithe as a sOng; ' He gambols along And waves to eaoh-frUnd-A wagglesome end. With whistle and bark They're off for a lark: According to whim. A hunt or a swim, A tramp or a run, Or any old fun. They don't care a Jot ' If sohool keeps or not. When, anythlng's up, . The boy andethe pup! That duo nt Joy, A pup and a boy. Cot Price Fopalarlsed. Chicago News. Dealers may cut prices on patented goods under the ruling of the United States supreme court Does this apply tn foreign patents of nobility? niDlro In 1&I1 did so few German citizens effort to deny him the privilege, for ha emigrate to foreign parts as In 1911 The "la a fine specimen of the old-time negro I number was IS. MS, compared with , and Is very much Uke4 by all the white ,n 1 te ,ll0 M r,a In JS8L people." Sure Thins, Ualley. Houston Post We believe If the Omaha Water board would reduce the price of water from two bits a thousand gallons to a dime a thousand the esteemed Omaha Bee would sample a quart of it Resinol stops skin torments THE sobthinp;, healing medica tion in Resinol Ointment and Resinol Soap penetrates the tiny pores of the'.skin, clears them of impurities, and stops itching in stantly. Resinol heals eczema, rashes, ringworm, and other erup tions, and removes disfiguring pimples and blackheads quickly and easily, even when other treat ments have been useless. Prescribed for 18 years Resinol is not an experiment. It ia a doctor's prescription which proved so successful for skin and scalp troubles that it has been used by other doctors all over the country for eighteen years. No other' treatment for the ekin now before thd public can thow tueha record of professional approval, Practically every druggist, large or small, sells Resinol Ointment (&0c and $1) -and Resinol Soap (25c), but you can test them at our expense if you prefer. Send to Dept 80-Sy Resinol, Baltimore, Md., for a liberal sample of each and the two new Resjnol booVleU.- HBBsjsHiSBSsflUsflflHflHiBHiBflBSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSiHHI BBsVPBSKSBSSBBSBBBBBSsflRSHIBBSrBSfeBflSBSBBBBSaBSBUf klsBBBBBBBBBll Eastern Excursion Fares VIA Illinois Central Bummer Excursion Tickets now on sale to New York, Boston, Atlantic City, Montreal, Portland, Buffalo, Detroit, Toronto, Nor folk, Quebec and numerous other points in the East. Attractive Tours via the Great Lakes, the St. Lawrence River and Thousand Islands. Stopovers at practically all points on-routo. Detailed Information and rates at city Ticket Oftleo, 407 South 16th Streot, Omaha. Telephone Douglas 2G4.