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4 THE BEE: OMAIIA, MONDAY, DECEMBER 1. 1913. THE OMAHA DAILY BEE FOUNDED BY EDWA1U) nOSBWATKH VICTOR BOSEWATEB, EDITOR. HEB BUUDINO. FAIWAM AND 17T1I. KhfweJI at Omihl DOStOfflCe as cconJ- cisss mauer. Sunday Dm, on rear I Saturday B, one year S Daily Bm, without Sunday, on year.. . TV.Ilv TIm Bni1 RnnrtnT. one yeT..,-. -w Evening and Sunday Bee, per month. .we Evening, without Sunday, per month. .c Dally Bee, Including Sundar. per rno..gJ Xally Bee. without Sunday, per month. 5o v Address all complaints of lrrelntle In deliveries to City Circulation PPt REMITTANCE. , Remit by draft, express r P) r' fayable to The Bee Publishing company. Only J-cent stamps received In PJ-Tment of (mall account. Feraonsl ecks. ex cept on Omaha and eeetern exchsnga, not accepted. oirirtcElL Omaha-The T3ee building. South Omaha-atS N attest Council Bluffs-M riorth Main street. T.fcieoln-W Little building. Chicago-Wl Hearst milldliw. New Tork-Rootn 1188. JM Fifth avenue. Bt- Louls-Ws New Bank of Commerce. Washington 725 Fourteenth St.. N. w. nnoBircDnHnEKCX Communication relating to nss and editorial matter ahould be addresed Omaha Bee, Editorial department. OCTOBER CIRCUIiATlOH. 51,725 State of Nebraska. County of Doualaa. s. D wight Williams, ctrculaUon manager ef The Bee Publishing company, being duly .worn, says that th. average dally circulation for tii month of October, 5l was 6V. DWIQHT V7ILJJAM8, , wH circulation Manager. Subscribed la my pmeiwo and sworn tobefor.m.thUld. Notary Public. SnbtCTHmr seTtff th city temporarily ahoalA kMV The Bee Mailed te them. AMhm rrlU hm cfcaagea mm often a rted. The curfew is to be resurrected la Omaha. Get your ago certificates early. Hlo J&cet FeeUeat Wilson's tint extra season of congress. Bequlescat 9eaator Hitekcock sees little In the ataw bill taat ie set traftspar eiitlr wrear. Mr. Weather Man, please take aoUee &it we are sew la the wentk ef December. Evidently, the sure way for Huerta's forces to avoid losing is to evade tbeir enemies,' What to there afeeUt em Kirls ears that they stowM feel It so necessary to eecal theca, E. H. sethera lias heea degreed by aa eaeierR eei)ee, yet eeatlauee to he regarded as a Kreat acter. The most dtetresetag thlag about, it all is that our etatesraea jfc hr-i able to pull 4ft the mileare grab, X Qtrmfxmimi asks If it is eer feet to'sfeak et a preetdeat abdiesbt laat. ,A pre(dest ifa meairchy, ltlte The wid a, turned ent sie er-Kfes 1st Hs star, tout a alUrewd meitiVor f rhmm affaire mI te 0. Bernard Wmlw, Extraat AMaotU! Iraad Whlt lock refuses to talk! Don't you be lieve a word of it. It bn the T61edo kids' trick to aell papers. Mary Garde says her mad aad .Uaae "are all takes up with my sew -rales;" yet maay felks accuse her ef cmiag by. It laeiwctively. The dKferewee between Uwt M4s twirl lightalag. akukter irifard aad J. rirpat Mergaf was that Mr. Morgan put hie to yrefitabte use.. "Goveraer Fees," ebservee an ex ish. "ra very well far a maa the "people aidn't want." Yes, tkare were 'four la the raee aad he ran feurth. i Spata dees set .wish te (x up la th Me4caa affair aad dees set keel tn ie eay se, la which ipala has tke better of aay ot the rest f vs. The propeeed municipal Ohrletmas tree will be a go if only the Spug ea be prevailed oa to give their con- seat It's a good thing, Push It aiong. Tor some peculiar reason Jim- ,ha&-lewis baa not asked why pcoplo refuse to take him seriously since that Plndell letter affair became public a uaiumore pastor received a basketful ot eggs from bis parish losers. Of course, the motive behind tke gift must determinded by the age C the a. The London papers aro evidently scooping their American contemno raries a good deal these days in find laf out President Wilson's Mexican program before It is made. The hbw water district law, among other thing, requires all meetings or conferences of the Water' board, Its committees, or committees of em ployes, to be held la public, and not behind closed doore. But what's the law to our Water boarders? White eur democratic insurgent dmcUe seaator i keeping him st baey eat here telUns all about it hie democratic colleagues la Wash agio are apparently aolag the but! neas. But, ef eeuree, there la b geatlesnea'a creeneat between thom. Democratic Partisanship. As has been frequently observed, partisanship always cuts deeper with responsible political control. It is tho minority that is always decrying Iho partisanship of the majority, and clamorously professing devotion to tho nonpartisan idea. There would be nothing remarkable about this ex cept for tho fact that the minority sometimes becomes a majority, and then its lightning change on the sub ject ot partisanship is nothing short of astonishing. That is what has been happening down at Washington by the conver sion of the democratic minority of years gone by into the present demo cratic majority in complete control not only of the two houses of con gress, but also of the Whlto House and all the administrative depart ments. According to the most reli able sources of information, never sinco tho closo of tho reconstruction period lias democratic partisanship been so strong or so unscrupulous in denying minority rights. The tariff bill waa put through tho house, and later through, the senate, by whip and spur ot tho caucus without consult ing republican or progressive sena tors and congressmen, much less giv ing thom an opportunity to help frame ot recast the measure. Jn the house tho currency bill ran the samo couTBOj when it reached tho sonate flno promises were made about let ting It come up and bo considered without referonce to party politics, but already it has reached the caucus stage, and if It passes, as it doubtless eventually will, it will bo as a party measure as muoh as was the tariff. The peope want to make up their mlada that the democrats are In tho saddle, and that they are going to be guided solely by partisan pur poses. The democrats are going to try to make the moat of It for demo crats, and to tighten the democratic bold oa the bridle. The nonpartisan ship they used to prate about has geae a-gllramerlag. Aa Water Seeks Its level. The National Council ot Teach ers of Engllnk in session at Chicago denounce "xagtimo in writing and speaking," as dostruc tlvo of the harmonies of speech as well as ot song and pload for de liverance from the current vernacu lar. Doubtless the newspapers came In, ax usual, for their share of tho blame for debasing the language. Yet en .the same day aa Iowa ocllege educator is pleading for the" "news paper style of writing" as the roqBt direct and cogent. Only a few days ago so high aa authority in the musi cal world as Reginald de Koven commended ragtime as an essential factor in building up our musla "as It should be built, from the bottom up, net the top down." 8e what are we to do with high authorities ranged on both sides of the question. Meet folks agree, thoueh peesibly somewhat at the cost of elegance, that the best ef our current Vernacular i expressive and convenient and servee the purpose better thaa tha more sluggish and cumbersome terms supplanted. Aside from that, however, and In spite ot all that higher professional criticism may say, with refereace to the age language like water reeks its level. Every pertod makes Tevls-toas in the speech and contributions to tho Ur8MW V make it serve the cur rent spirit, w.htch Just neW is mere Jaunly- than serleus. And that te the tendeaey of this "ragtime speaking and writing,' against which our highbrow friends Inveigh, Hare! Line for Takers. 9Kgtous cult fakers as well as medieal auaeka mm te have fallen en hard lines la Chicago, where twelve geed men and true have t the brand on the Inspired brow e"f His Highness, Ottoman Zar Adusht Haalsh, who claims to be from ladla. Otto is the Little Master" ot the Mazdas nan sun worshipers, consisting chiefly of a group ot credulous women. His special graft Is sex neu rotics taught by "inner studies," celled in much mysticism. Of course, the mysticism is essential to the real beauties ot any occult science. Otto got along wlnningly until he began to send Joo much qt his divine" literature through the malls, where some of it fell into the every-ready hands ot Uncle Sam's sleuths. Now Otto, said to be only a former Rait Lake printer, who started out by emulating the late Brigham Young In a matrimonial way, seems to have a fine chance of going down to Join another emi nent cult cultivator, "Doctor" Evelyn Arthur Bee, landed In the same place when his fraud was exploded. Through the sophistry ot these crafty money-makers one gets a good glimpse ot the gullibility of human nature. No fake or quack ery is so transparent as to fail to find some victims. Here Is another place where the federal government steps in to protect simple people trom their own weakness and it Is doing an excellent piece ot work every time It ferrets out and brings such charlatans to Justice. Even though It does not stop the trade ot other mountebanks. A school board in Omaha without a little politics in it or on the eldo would not be the real thing. f I . f T 1 looKinjQJjacKwari coMrnxa raoM arc tnt DECEMBER 1. Thirty Years Ago It la twenty years tnce the flrat shovelful was turned on the Union Pa cific railway and the event Ii being com memorated. The famous Union Catholic Library as sociation "craay quilt" la on exhibition at O'Donohoe & Downlng's. The quilt l composed of fprtj'-nlne block, each twelve Inches square, of silk, satin and velvet, profusely decorated with varlou styles of needlework and hand-palntlng. Among the moit striking blocks are a pray ot lilies done In oil on black satin by Mli O'Leary of New York; a night scene etched on old gold natln by Miss E. Sexton, field flowers In noedlework by Mrs. M. Donovan, calla llltea In oil on black aatln by Mrs. M. Eagan, out line of bouquet stitched on blue satin by Mrs. M. Bchwartxlander, lullaby on ruby satin by Miss Mary Qulnn, the bride's block on helltrope satin by Mrs. J. J.ap'Oonnor, popples on white satin by Mrs. James Crelghton and fuchsias and tulips on pink brocade by Mrs. M. J. OMJrlon. Most Interesting Is tho mono gram block of scarlet plush with mono gram In needlework, executed by tho young gentlemen of the association, Messrs. McCarthy, Shelby, Downey, Arnold, Griffin, Connolly, McNamara, McMahan, Waugh, Rlckaby, O'Brien and Blair. The quilt Is to be disposed of by lottery with eOO chances at SI each. Commissioner George II. Daniels of the Colorado Pool association for the rail roads In that combine nan the effrontry to announce that there will be no more passes Issued for lines west of the Mis souri river. Georgo Ward, clerk In the transporta tion department of the depot quarter master's office, has returned from Wash ington with his bride. J, D, Cook of Toledo. O., consulting engineer of the waterworks, who has been here to teat the new pump, has closed his work and started for home. Mnsonlo hall was filled with people to hear Thomas Brennan's lecture, "Th Defense of Ireland." Twenty Years Ago Mrs. 8. II. II, Clark, Wife ot the presi dent of the Union Pacific, left for St. Louis for a short stay. General Managers Dickinson ot the Un ion Pacific, Iloldregc ot the Burlington and Burt of the Northwestern, were In conference on matters relating Jointly to their lines, awttchlng charges and others. Mrs. Fred Mertschelmer and children spent Thanksgiving with Mrs. Mert schetmer'a parents. Judge and Mrs. C. A. Baldwin. The Mertschelmers reside In Kansas City, where they went from Omaha when Mr. .Mertschelmer waa made Kansas division master mechanic for the Union Pacific. L. J. FlUgerald ot Cortland, N. T ex treasurer and a prominent politician of that state, was a visitor upon M. I Sheerer. m Judge Dundy of. the federal court, who was asked by John M. Thurston, general solicitor of the Union Pacific, to fix the salary ot each ot the five, receivers of that company at 11,060 a mdnth, said ha would first determine whether the re ceivers were mofe than Inero ornaments. He was loth to think 'they were, earning bo much monoy in their capacity as re ceiver. John C. Cowln, attorney for the government In the receivership, said he did net know whether the government would consider the figure reasonable or exorbitant; that ho had advised eastern counsel of ths application and was await ing word. Postmaster Clarksdn said) in reply to a current rumor that his commission ex pired on October 1, past, that he had strong documentary evidence over the signature of Benjamin 'Harrison as presi dent of the United States to show that ths date waa October 1, 1K?1. Ten Years Ago As the demand for seats for the James Whltcomb lUley lecture at the First Methodist church so far overran the church's seating capacity, It was deemed necessary to transfer the lecture to the Boyd theater. Mrs. John Kennelly, 3623 South Four teenth street, received word from Mia outav Monti of the death of her brother, William Ryan, H years old. Plana were at once mads tor the return of ths body tq Omaha and .burial at St. Mary's ceme tery, South Offiahai XL W. Baxter resigned as Nebraska su perintendent of the Union Pacific, with Mrs. Baxter returned from their pleasure trip to the east and planned for continu ing their vacation by a trln to the Pa- clfio coast. Mr. Jtoxter, who had been for a third of a century with the Overland, said he was not bothering his head about, Work, but was seeking pleasure for & while. Ada Rehan and Otis Skinner began their Shakespearan reportory at theN' Boyd with "Taming the Shrew." They were greeted by a large number who seemed delighted with Mr. Skinner's In terpretation of Shakespeare's remedy for making a wife behave herself. Here and There Doctors in Paris liaru begun a crusade against women's veils, which they de clare are perilous to health and mere receptacles to microbes. Joseph Stewart, second assistant post master general, boldly tells New York of ficials they cannot limit the speed of motor mall wagons. These speeding w ax ons killed twelve persons and Injured twetve since September V While leading a runeral procession the driver of a New York automobile hearse was arrested for exceeding the speed limit. Moreover, he was convicted and fined. There seems to be literally noth ing slow about New York. By some strange caprice of fortune Pennsylvania politicians did not break Into the Gettysburg reunion appropria tion. Owing to their absence from the management an unexpended balance ot IU.TO waa covered back Into the state treasury. The first cargo of Argentine com Is to reach New Orleans early next month, and halt ot It will be sent to Galveston, Though It can be sold a tew cents cheaper than American corn It is not believed that the quantity Imported will be great enough to affect the market seriously. The quality of the grain Is excellent being unusually hard and dry, with but U per cent ot moisture, and Is arousing the interest of Louisiana grain men, who believe that it might be rataed profitably in Louisiana, where the moisture of the climate la unfavorable to the softer varie ties of malts National Politics A Wnshlrurton Ileporter. New York Sun. The chautauqua Idol who reports for his Nebraaka paper the proceedings of Mr. Wilson's cabinet commends editori ally In that valued periodical Mr. Wil son's Mobile speech: It lifts the nation's thousrht from the level of material Interest to the plane of free government and Into a realm where moral considerations hare weight Without any reference to Mr. Wilson's Mobile speech and without expressing re gret that Mr. Bryan's consideration of his material interests put him on circuit this year. It may be worth while to men tion as a specimen of current cant the antithesis which ho makes. Material In terests are low and Immoral. It is the business of a free government to be above and "sit on" them. Abstract "morality" must bo the rule and guide of national and International affairs. Mr. Bryan and his fellow "moralists'' all get good sal aries, paid by material interests for super intending, muddling and Injuring material In tercets". They are a higher plane; they aro good little cherubs sitting up aloft. Free government exists to batten these professors of ethics. Provided thoy "lift'1 the nation's thought, lei tho na tion's business go to pot Such Is a faithful conrre material trans lation of the patter of the high paid moralist who reports for his weekly and material Interests the proceedings of Mr. Wilson's cabinet Rrpnbltcnnn nnd Prosrrrsalrea. Indianapolis News. In a leading editorial of a column's length, tms Cleveland Leader. Dan n. Hanna's paper, strongly urges the get ting together of tho republican and progressive parties. "It has-been demon strated," says tho Leader, "that union Is the only way to prevent democratic as cendancy In the nation and In most of the states, In all sections of the coun try." A year ago there was no stronger sup porter of the progresstvo party and Its candidates than Mr. Hanna. The stubs ot his check book offered the most con vincing proof of that Indeed, he stood at Armageddon until the last man fell. And with him, It will bo remembered, stood Frank A. Munsey, who could also evidence his loyalty by the stubs In his Check book. Tot Mr. Munsey has also lost confidence In the progressive cause, and was, in fact, one of the first well- known members of the party to advocate a getting together with the republicans as tho only means that would offer the least chance of successfully opposing the triumphant democrats. In further discussing the question of closing up the split the Leader Insists that the country has not been converted to democratic doctrines, and lays stress on the democrats' lack of a majority at the last election. "The future," It says. "Is not for the democrats to shape or decldj, except In so far as tho republicans and progressives throw away their op portunities and abdicate their natural leadership." Continuing, It says: "Tho situation calls for plain common sense, it demands the application to public Issues and political campaigns of the rule, that .little things must be subor dinated to great needs, which is the very life of progress and success in the pri vate affairs ot sensible men. There Is no need ot giving up principles, but there Is much need of suppressing the hotheads and self-eetkers, both republicans and progressives, who cry 6ut against any compromise or adjustment whatever. It Is evident from this that Mr. Hanna has seen the light, and seen It clearly. The drift of republican sentiment and 'of progressive sentiment which is only re publican sentiment under another name, except In the case of the few hot-heads that the Leader refers to Is clearly In the direction here Indicated. There Is a realization that If there Is to be an ef fective opposition party a little common sense roust be exercised. Hence tho Leader Is wholly correct when It says: The spirit of compromise and union is wider and more potent than It has been at any time since the republican party was split asunder. More repub licans and progressives desire to get to gether, and they are more deeply In terested In bringing about the end of democrats minority government In the Ration' and In the great northern states whose public officials misrepresent the larger part of their cltlieis." The truth ot the mstter Is that the progressive party had no foundation on which to build. It was strictly an emo ttonsl uprising, and that sort ot emotion does not last In politics any better than It does In anything else. Probably the great obstacles In, the way of the reor sanitation and consolidation of the op ponents of the democrats are the emi nent kenUemeit who feel that after their recent 'course they cannot possibly go back' to ths republican party. These men are fighting not for the country's good, or even their party's good, but for their own political lives. That they aro making a losing fight Is unfortunate for them. But one must pay the penalty for one's bad Judgment-and vanity. Tabloids of Science The French military authorities have succeeded in making a man-carrying kite. A new metal fence post spreads as It enters tho ground und effectually anchors Itself firmly In the ground. A beo, unladen, will fly forty mles an hour, but one coming laden with honey does not travel faster than twelve miles an hour. a II. McDowell of Welland, Ont. re ports that a sixteen c-p. Incandescent lamp still In use at his home has been In almost continuous service since 1901, At a recent dairy convention in Oregon It was shown that one man with on elec tro! milking machine can milk tour times aa many cows as he can by hand In the rame length of time. It was announced at the recent Inter national Congress of Refrigeration held In Chicago that Dr. Kanerllngh Onnes had produced a temperature ot 43$ degrees Fahrenheit below zero. The tuberculosis statistics of Germany show a great reduction in the mortality which has been particularly marked In hospitals and homes for consumptives. having dropped within sixteen years from thirty-one to twelve per 1.000. HUB Coat of DfluK, New York World. The manufacturer of coffins who testi fied in court that trs Is a reasonable sum for an undertaker to charge for a casket that the manufacturer had sold him for tlOt doubtless based his con clusion upon the fact (hat it was not his funeral. sKL e es. Slannfactnrrra Welcome Help. LINCOLN. Nov. .-To the Flltor of The Bee: We want you to know that your several articles relative to our leoent convention and to the future work of tills association arc appreciated by our members. We realize that without r.ri.in amount of publicity It would be Impossible to mnKe such an organization a success. By co-oneratlnir with mu vmt r. mv. ing It Possible for US to devolnn rrAtr Industries, which simply results In multi plying the opportunities of your paper In many ways. Any time roU Want uir Infnrmiillnn that we can furnish we would be glad to accommodate you. FRANK I. IlINOER, Commissioner. llamnn Courtesies. BEATRICE!. Neb.. Nov. aoT Tn h. Editor of The Bee: While recently between Omaha and Ashland my attention was called to a small act worth mentioning. As the train nonrlncr tho Platte It began to proceed slowly across this stream. Passengers naturally wonaertng why, raised the car windows to get a better view. Th provoment being made here that requires a great many workmen. The train, a lomt one, waa filled with passengers from all stations In life and various greetings were exchanged while we were passing. In one or two Instances the day's papers that had been purchased In the cltv and already read were thrown at the feet of tne workmen who seemed eager and anxious for them. To my mind this was an Incident ef common courtesy worth while. Of tho considerable number of men In this camp, many would surely appreciate such tavors not so much because unable to purchasa them, but because unablfc to get the news as fresh. No matter If the face Is somewhat soiled and th cut of the garments are different, some bright minds might be stimulated and long evenings spent profitably by those who care to read, these In turn nn. consciously help the other fellow less weu posted. TEE JAY AITCIL. Insanity unit the Liquor Larva. OMAHA, Nov. 30.-To the Editor of The Bte: Much misinformation being spread through some overcredulous or biased papers and politicians regarding 'the su perior condition ot Kansas under pro hibition, as against Nebraska under license and regulation, involving a de famation of our good state of Nebraska, the following from "The Medical Record," an authority on the subject referred to may be of Interest to your readers. Br. Edward II. Williams, ot No. 12 i-tieirose piace, does not think that prohi bition tends to decrease Insanity, which is a favorite argument of the "drvs." "We are not Justified In assuming, for example, simply Decause tne -wet" state of New York has more Insane persons per capita than Kansas, that prohibi tion Is responsible for the difference," he writes. Comparing "dry" Kansas with "wet" Nebraska, Dr. Williams finds that the number of coses of insanity to the 109,000 of population in Kansas decreased .from 62.2 in 1901 to 62.4 in 1910. In Nebraska, In the same period, there was a decrease trom 62.1 to JU.K. It is evident therefore, that Kansas la not the only state In which insanity Is decreasing.- It Is not even the state In which there has been the greatest de crease. From all of which It Is vident that Kansas' insanity record furnishes no basis for claiming superiority of the prohibitive form of liquor legislation. Tho physician finds that there were many coses of alcoholic Insanity in Kansas in the- three years prohibition laws were most rigidly enforced. He thinks there should have .been none It prohibition really prohibited. Dr. Williams is- of the opinion that the low r&tu of Insanity In Kansas s due to the fact that the people of the state, on the average, live In better sur roundings than can be found In eastern cities where there Is a large slum popu, latlon. Will you kindly give this space In your paper? A. L. M. The- Eaaesice of Socialism. LINCOLN. Nov. 30,-To the Editor of The Bee: In today's Bee "E. V. 8." of Omaha calls attention to the remarkable article In the Metropolitan entitled "The Case for Equality," by George Bernard (Thaw, the Irish critic and playwright, and rightly concludes that supporters of our present economlo system will havo difficulty In answering it For example, a comparison of the pay, toll and risk of the positions ot brake man and bishop will show the false basis upon which society rests, A brak man for 90 a month or less walks the Icy top of a freight car at midnight in sero weather, while a bishop dwells safely In a palace, rent and tax free. Is provided with the best food la the mar ket and Is paid from 16,030 to tl5,) a year, with occasional vacation trips to Europe, and he is generally attired la a costume In which be could do no really useful, necessary work. The brakeman we could not possibly spare; but Uie services of all the bishops wi probably could dispense with without real loss to any man, woman or child. Will some correspondent of The Bee tell your readers. It he can, why a bishop should receive mors pay than a brakemanT F. J. IRWIN, Activities of Women Mrs. Pankhurst Indignantly declines on offer of marriage and says: "I'm a politician and am not considering such things." ' Mrs: J. Borden Harrlman, appointed re cently a member of the National Indus trial commission, has accepted the chair, manshlp of the committee. She will have to reside In Washington and is making her plans to that effect The foreman of a Jury In Chrlstlanla, Norway, la a recently appointed woman, Mrs. Randl Blshr. She Is salu to be the first woman In Europe to hold this posl tlon, although women havebeeo serving on Juries in Norway for years. Mrs. Joseph T. Bowen, president of th Juvenile Protective association ot Chicago and an earnest worker for child welfare, says that bad cooking has much to do with drunkenness ot men and that gen eral ahtftlessness tn the house Is also re sponsible. Women in Pennsylvania have begun a campaign against the bachelor legislators. They will ask the voters of the stats to substitute married men Instead of the un married, wherever one of the latter has been nominated for congress. There are sad to be quite a number of unmarried men at Harriaburg aAd It Is contended that they do not understand the Interests of the home is welt as husbands and fathers. 7 stt&2 Hammer Taps One half the world Is looking for a chance to sting the other half. And those who marry at leisure have been known to repent In hosts. We are always willing to boost a msn when we find that he has almost reached the top. When a man Is sick and on his back. he wouldn't swap his wife for n carlood of affinities. It mokes a man sore when he Is away from town a month and comes back and finds that nobody has missed him. A lazy man stands behind a glass and .trios to kill time. A lazy woman stands In front of a glass and tries to beat time. Nature is a pretty wise old cuss. That's why a woman with a double chin can't talk twice as much as any other woman. If a man went Into a theater wearing nothing but a vest above his waistline he would be arrested. But a woman can get away with it The old-fashioned man whose wife made him calico shirts that looked like awnings nearly always owned his home and had money in the bank. When a girl with props like piano legs Is wearing a short walking skirt and sits down In a street cor the men on the other side of the car cant find a blame thing to read In their newspapers. CHEEKY CHAFF. "Your salary Isn't enough to support my daughter." "I'm glad you've como 'o that conclu sion so early, sir." Boston Transcript "What makes you so anxious to send Three-flnger Sam to the legislature. He It n't so very popular." "No. We citizens of Crimson Gulch The easy Resinol way to get rid of pimples DIMPLES and blackheads disanDear. 1 unsightly complexions! become clean", clear, and velvety, and hair health and beauty are promoted by the regular use of Resinol Soap and an oc casional application of Resinol Oint ment These soothing, healing prep-ar-tions do their work easily, quickly and at little cost, when even the most ejeoensive cosmetics and complicated "beauty treatments " fail Successful home baking Good shortening and plenty of it is one of the secrets of successful cakes and pastry. Make yours the best by using rmours Glendale Butterine which takes the butter and costs AKMOURCOMFAmr DON'T look for footprints. make your own. If the imitative advertiser would pause to think of what coat tails cover, he'd stop, calling to them. j figured that It would be a great savin' to the general community to get a poker 'player like Sam 'ncated some wlere else," Washington Star. "My wife was to give a rose tea, every thing scented with roses." "A delicate conceit" "Yes; but things went wrong. The peo ple In ttje next flat took that occasion to hove dnlona and cabbage." Courier Juurnal "Pop, "here this book says that Apollo struck the sounding lyre." "Well, what of U7" "Didn't they have any Ananias club In Apollo's time that they had to beat tho liars up?" Baltimore American. "I suppose you laugh a great deal at the new styles." "I do. But my wife doesn't" "Takes 'em pretty seriously, hehr "Well, not exsctly that: It's this way, you see. Pat a woman In one of these liveraso tight-fitting gowns and anr sort of a gaod laugh would burst all ths buttons off. 'St Louis Requbllo. - i DANCE OF THE SUNBEAMS. Smart Set Wren morning Is high o'er the hilltops, On river and stream and lake. Wherever a young breeze whispers, The sun-clad dancers awake. One after one upspringing, Thoy flash from their dim retreat. Merry as running laughter Is the n-iws of their twinkling feet Over the floor of azure Wherever the wind flaws run. Sparkling, leaping and racing, Their antics scatter the sun. As long as water ripples. And weather Is clear and glad, Day after day thoy aro dancing, NeVer a moment sad. But when through the field of heaven The. wings of storm take flight, At a touch of the flying shadows They falter and slip from sight Until at tho gray day's ending. As the squadrons .of cloud retire. Thoy pass In the triumph of sunset With banners of crimson flro. For IS years Resinol bas been doctor's prescription and household rsmedjr for eessma, ring worm, rashss and other skin eruptions, dandruff, burns, sores, etc Stops Itchlnr Instantly. Resthol Ointment (60s and JO and Resinol Soap (2fc) an sold by all drossitts. For sample of each, writs to Dept. I1-S, Resinol Baltimore, Mi, place less.