Tit Simle Signatare OK
The Run Cam* In.
Joe Sugdeu claims that lie Is the
only living rival to Joliu Anderson,
who made btineUnll history by stealing
second with the IIHKVN lull.
Joe let a tying run step across the
plate while he held the ball In Ills
band and refused to touch the runner.
There were men on second and third,
one man out. the score 3 to 2 one day
at New Orleans, hon Charleston was
playing there, hack In 1S93. The game
was stopped for some reason, and the
coaeher at first mit on the sack during
the delay Joe looked over the Infield
and saw three men on bases.
The first ball pitched when the game
was again started was hit to the third
baseman, who threw home In worlds
of time to g*t the man trying to score.
Joe thought the man was forced out
and yelled at Denny Umg, the first
baseman, to get on the sack to com
plete a double piny, while Long yelled
at Joe to touch his man
The ronnvr stepped nimbly on the
plate while Joe swore at the first base
They revived Joe with cold water
after he bad discovered what he bad
Each to All.
Who live» pure life and doeth righteous
And walke straight path»—however othere
Thle la the better wax.
No drop but Hervel the »lowly lifting tide.
No dew but ha» an errand to some flower.
No smallest »tar but »bed» some helpful
And man by man, each giving to all the
lfakee the firm bulwark of the country"»
There I» no better way.
Dr. Norman Porrltt, the consulting
surgeon of the Royal Infirmary at Hud
derefleld, Yorkshire. England, does not
mind telling a story against himself.
He saye that on one occasion be was
called to a butcher's shop to examine
some meat that had been condemned
by the medical officer of health as
being unfit for human consumption.
When the case came on for hearing
in the local police court one of the
witnesses, a butcher, was asked, "Who
were present when the meat was ex
To which the witness answered quite
seriously, "Dr. Porrltt and a number
of other butchers!"
A Scot's Tune One Scot Didn't Like.
A new admiral—a Macdonald—had
succeeded Admiral Campbell In the
command of a British squadron. The
band had been In the habit of playing
"The Campbells Are Coming" when
their former admiral bad a dinner
party, and they did so tn honor of
The first time the chief of the Mac
donald« heard It (tells Admiral Fitz
gerald In "Memories of the Sea") he
was very angry and sent for me—the
captain being on shore—end the fol
lowing dialogue took place:
"What do they mean by playing
The Campbells Are Coming?'
"It has been customary to play It.
sir, as a compliment to Admiral Camp
bell, and, being a Scotch air. no doubt
the bandmaster thought It would be
agreeable to you."
"Agreeable to met Don't you know
the next line of the song, 'The Camp
bells are coming, the Macdonalds' are
running?' Never let me hear that tune
And the bandmaster was ordered to
teach the band "The Garb of Old
The subjects of Queen Victoria held
their sovereign In veneration and re
spect It was only among fier own
family circle, where she was "granny"
and not "her majesty." that any criti
cism of her character and disposition
was ever heard. There Is one amusing
Incident In point told by Mrs. Hugh
Fräser In "The Reminiscences of a Di
Miss Elizabeth C. Berdan was an In
timate friend of the young princesses
and was In great request at the palace
as a playmate for the young girls.
One day one of the princesses gave
Ilss Berdan a ring. It was a pretty
little trinket, but simple and Inexpen
sive. "I would like to give you some
thing much finer, Bessie," said the
princess apologetically, "bat, you know.
Granny Vic Is so stingy!"
Scoop had-been assigned to cover the
lecture of a noted French orator. The
hall In which the lecture was delivered
was very warm and comfortable, and
Scoop went to sleep. At the close of
the lecture be woke up with a start,
and as he pulled himself together his
haty mind caught the words "shifting
sands." That was sufficient for Scoop.
Arriving at the- office, he straightway
proceeded to the "dope room," where
be spent a good half hour reading
about shifting sands.
When the French orator opened the
paper next morning he found himself
credited with having given a long talk
•n shifting sands the night before.
Jamming the paper Into his pocket, the
Frenchman went with long strides to
the editor and demanded an explana
tion for the story.
"What is the matter?" asked the edi
tor. "Doesn't the article, cover the
"Cover se subject. Indeed!" replied
the Frenchman "I said nothing about
ehiftia* sands, except dat ijay would
be *e subject on which I lecture next
WALKED INTO THE TRAP.
It Wae a Tantalizing Scheme, and It
Unmasked the Pretender.
There are many stories extant, amus
ing as well as Instructive, of the
dodges resorted to by British soldiers
who wish to get "Invalided" home
from an undesirable station There Is
the case of the professed deaf and
dumb man The patient, who appear
ed suddenly and miacountably to have
gone deaf and dumb, when asked a
question, would stare straight to his
front in stony silence.
The dumb mail was removed to the
hospital for treatment, and upon his
diet sheet each morning was written a
tempting array of hospital comforts
such as T. Atkins loves—rice pudding,
bacon, eggs, milk punch and even
beer. This list of luxuries could be
studied by all who cared to read. But
day after day the medical orderly
"HB'» A MAB, 81*1"
brought nothing to the poor patient
but plain milk. Each morning. In
sympathetic voice, the officer Inquired
of the orderly In front of the patient
whether each and every article of diet
had been provided. The orderly glibly
answered. "Yes, sir!"
"Did he get his beer with his din
ner, all he wanted of It, and his milk
punch before he went to bed?"
And again would come from the or
derly a cheerful, "Yes, sir."
At first the poor deaf and dumb
man's face would redden, but never a
word could he bear or speak. There
Is, however, a limit to ail endurance,
and it was for that limit that the of
ficer waited. Fully convinced that the
orderly was a thief and a heartless
scoundrel and had been bagging the
comforts for himself, the patient could
stand it no longer.
"He's a liar, sir!" gasped he at last
"I've had naught but milk for a week!"
Result Immediate discharge from
hospital and a court martial.
Make the Plunge.
To do anything worth while In the
world we must not stand shivering on
the brink and thinking of the cold and
the danger, but Jump In and scramble
through as well as we can.—Sidney
No Room For Speeding.
Mr. Atkins was driving over his
property with his daughter and a
young man whom he was beginning to
took upon as a possible and very de
The chauffeur, not unnaturally, was
Inclined to show off the motorcar,
but Mr. Atkins himself had higher
thoughts. As John, the chauffeur,
quickened his speed he leaned over
near him and said In a. whisper:
"Not so fast, John, not so fast. You
make my estate look too small."
Needed a Lawn Mower.
There was but one tonsorlal chair In
the village barber shop, and It was oc
cupied by a stalwart fellow, evidently
a blacksmith. Judging.'from the stub
born growth of beard, the patron could
not have shaved but once a week on an
average, for the growth was like a
scrubbing, brush. The barber made a
lather, placed It all over the countenance
of the recumbent blacksmith, stropped
the razor vigorously and sailed into his
work. After he had struggled long and
dangerously over his patron he felt
constrained to say:
"Ain't I hurtln' youT"
"No." answered the Plutonian gen
tleman. still with energy.
"I seem to be workln' hard without
gettin* there." commented the barber
"Oh, Just go on." encouraged the
blacksmith. "You're doin all right,
for them you ain't cuttln' off you're
cripplln' so much I guess they'll never
grow again!"—Chicago Record-Herald.
When the Game Was Called.
Casey announced to his wife, Ellen,
that he was going to the ball game.
All day he was gone. Night came, but
no Casey to take his place at the heal
of the table. Midnight and no Casey.
One o'clock—2 o'clock—3 o'clock—no
As the 6 o'clock whistles began to
blow Casey stumbled up the front
stairs into the house and awakened hie
wife by his efforts to negotiate the
She hopped out of bed and met her
better half In the doorway.
"WellT" iald Mrs. Casey, determina
tion written on her face.
"Sal-rite. Illln," said Casey weakly.
"The game was called on account of
"Dig into the eousiiousuess of the
average Intelligent American citizen
wli :n discussion of any form of civic
improvement la proceeding, and you
are almost certain to find that lie re
fers it all eventually to what he calls
'the city b».i ltlful movement,' says ,1.
Horace Macl'arland of Harrisliurg In
the- Philadelphia Ledger.
"He thinks of community planning in
terms of civic centers. Illuminated
signs (the great white way), cluster
lighting and other display adjuncts.
His city beautiful, too. varies accord
ing to his Ideals. One citizen showed
Ills conception of the city beautiful for
Newark by printing on the cover of a
billboard magazine a picture of Broad
street in that New Jersey metropolis,
with every building bearing double
decked signs urging the merits of beer
and bread, of stoves and soap, of toilet
powder and safety razors. Another Is
much pleased when he can secure the
whitewashing of the mutilated tree
trunks about the uuorderly public
square in his home town, while yet an
other sees In a tawdry soldiers' monu
ment. flanked by a monstrous flagpole,
several dismounted cannon, some wire
flower baskets and four or five enor
mous telephone poles, his ideal of a
"In a prosperous eastern capital city
the city beautiful thought was present
when a million dollar municipal build
ing was placed In surroundings that
make It grotesque, located as it Is ut
terly away from other public buildings
or open spaces.
"All of these and others, with yet
other fifty-seven varieties of misplaced
civic emphasis, are sincere in their de
sires for their communities. But they
don't know what the city beautiful
really Is, and. alas, they don't know
that they don't know!
"It Is the city clean, the city prac
tical, the city efficient, that we need in
America. In l'act, I believe that clean
liness, practicability and efficiency must
and do surely precede real beauty. I
told a small community a few days
ago. In discussing Its very serious
needs, that It needed first to clean up
and then to dress up."
KANSAS CITY PARK PLAN.
New System of Taxation Successful,
Producing Most Satisfactory Results.
How Kansas City. Mo.-, through a tax
ation system based on dividing the city
into park districts, financed its cam
paign for city beautificatlon was told by
Oeorge E. Kessler, fellow of the Ameri
can Society of Landscape Architects,
in an address at the recent national
conference on city planning at Chi
"This system," said Mr. Kessler, "has
placed the park department of Kansas
City In a semi independent position
with reference to its funds and has
made It possible to accomplish results
that would have been entirely out of
the question under any other financial
system in that city.
"In practice the system is an amplifi
cation of the single tax theory. It was
not accomplished as a matter of Choice,
but as a matter of necessity, and, inas
much as no properties had been ac
quired under any other system, the tax
paying public finally acquiesced and is
constantly urging an even more exten
sive development in order that the en
tire city may obtain commensurate
benefits through Improvement in every
Against the Ubiquitous Billboard.
Agitation against the billboard
nuisance is lively in many sections and
in spite of much opposition will not
lown. Civic: organizations In many
Mties are waging a more or less bitter
warfare against this universally ac
knowledged evil. One federation of
clubs in a western state has this to say
In a circular recently issued:
"Never cease to agitate talk against
the unsightly billboards and do all
within your power to rid your town of
them. Refuse to patronize firms ad
vertising In this manner. They will
soon find out It does not pay them to
use billboards In your town, and you
will have gone a long way toward
Adding the state of them." An active
campaign for legislation adverse to
this objectionable form of advertising
is now going on in numerous states
ind In the end gives promise of being
More Window Boxes Needed.
Visitors to European cities note the
beauty and gayely given otherwise som
ber business buildings by the many
window boxes filled with bright foliage
ind brilliant or attracive blossoms. In
those cities most noted for civic beauty
these boxes are a marked feature of all
Hasses of buildings both public and
private. They are easily maintained
with lltttle cost of time or money, and
It is strange that more city dwellers do
not have them. Their bright blossoms
are restful to the eye and at the same
time Inspiriting to the passerby as well
as to the occupants of the house, and
a few window boxes in a block trans
form it from a drear, drab chasm of
brick and stone into a vista that 1a
CITIES SHOULD CLEAN UP SUCCESSFUL MERCHANTS
FIRST AND THEN DRESS UP. AID IN CLEANING CITY.
Cleanliness, Practicability and Efficien- Co-operation In Observance of Cleanup
cy Should Be Citizen's Thought. Day Brings Business.
Thousands of business failures are
recorded annually. Small dealers make
up the largest part of these. In al
most every community one or more go
on the list. Sometimes they have in
vested their last cent in an undertak
ing, with nothing in i^serve for an
emergency. They soon find themselves
hopelessly involved, with debts con
stautly creeping up around them, until
the pressure of creditors is so great
that they can no longer sustain It, and
bankruptcy is the result.
The wages of thoughtlessness is fail
ure. Go Into business with your eyes
fully open and know what you are
doing. If you have $500 to $1,000 or
more to Invest in a local enterprise
I keep out at least 25 per cent as a re
serve fund. This will help to tide you
over any difficulties which may arise.
When you start in a small way and
overburden yourself by accepting too
great a credit from some wholesaler on
the capital invested you at once Invite
difficulties. Unless you have a remark
able run of business when you first
open up your heavy obligation to the
wholesaler will come (foe and you will
find yourself entangled.
At once you will try to borrow money
to protect yourself, but this Is hard to
get If you are Indebted to the whole
saler for the amount of all the goods
In your store.
One of the chief causes of failure Is
the lack of Ideas by which to make
your business attractive to customers.
Advertising In the right way and at
the right time Is the best means of
stirring up trade. Several years ago a
man who had learned the grocery
business In a large city went back to
his home town and started In a small
way. He was a willing, hard worker,
but through lack of ingenuity and
Initiative he had to close his place,
losing the money he had Invested.
Two years ago, with a resourceful
silent partner, he again went Into busi
ness in the same town. This time,
with the assistance of his partner, the
business was given life and made to
live and expand. The partner at once
inserted an advertisement in the local
paper which read: "Our homemade
pies are good enough for Mayor John.
Aren't they good enough for you?"
The personality entered into in this ad
vertisement at once focused attention
to it. The mayor was running for re
election at the time, and the advertise
ment helped him also.
This was only the starter. Others
even more original were brought be
fore the people through the medium of
the local paper and at once caught and
held the attention of all. Day after
day new features were tried. Their
methods teemed with life. They show
ed clear mental vision and an Insight
into human nature. The advertise
ments offered the things that people
Last year the town had a cleanup
week. The new store at once adver
tised brooms and paint and other nec
essary commodities at reduced prices.
Recently It started on Its own account
a town beautiful campaign, adding to
its stock many things that could be
used in this connection, thus creating a
bigger field for development.
The returns on the original Invest
ment have enabled the partners to open
two other stores In nearby towns,
where the same plans for getting busi
ness are being successfully used.
MAPLE TREES H!S MONUMENT
Pennsylvania Man Beautified Streets
of Espy Fifty Years Ago.
Fifty years ago in Espy, Pa., M. C.
McCollum planted many maple trees on
the streets. He said that these trees
would always be a monument honor
ing his memory. During these years
Mr. McCollum has taken great inter
est in the growth and development of
This is a type of patriotism worth
far more than that aroused by war's
alarms. It makes for better living
because it Is constructive and per
manent and bears on home life. In
deed, men reared in such surroundings
will be better citizens and. If need be,
better soldiers, because their homes
are more than walls of brick or wood.
Just as Mr. McCollum has transformed
Espy from a village of houses to a
village of homes, so countless other
villages and towns may be transform
ed. It needs only the awakening of a
genuine, peaceful patriotism to make
oneself a public benefactor in this
kind of way. Such a movement will
surely keep one's memory green better
than "storied urn or animated bust."
Nasturtiums For Bare Spots.
Plant nasturtiums wherever there is
a bare spot in your back yard. Plant
them wherever you think there is going
to be a bare place. They are among
the most easily grown of flowers, and
the showy blossoms, which flower un
til frost can be used for cut flowers for
the house all through the summer.
One householder who has a back
yard garden always plants nastur
tiums about her hollyhocks. When she
cuts down the stalks of the hollyhocks
after the flowers have passed by—a
practice, by the way. which keeps the
plants strong and the flowers big—the
nasturtiums are Just -ready to demand
•very Inch of ground In sight.
State of Ohio, City of Toledo,
Frank J. Cheney makes oath
that he is senior partner of the
firm of F. J. Cheney & Co., doing
business in the City of Toledo,
County and State aforesaid, and
that said firm will pay the sum of
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for
each and every case of catarrh
that cannot be cured by the use
of HALL'S CATARRH CURE.
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and sub
scribed in my presence, this 6th
day of December, A. D. 1886.
(Seal) A. W. GLEASON,
Hall's Catarrh Cure is taken
internally and acts directly upon
the blood and mucuous surfaces
of the system. Send for testi
F. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, 0.
Sold by all Druggists. 75c.
Take Hall's Family Pills for
cor stipation. (2-5)
Statements of Milbank Citizens
Are Always ot Interest to
To many of our readers the
streets of Milbank are aln.ost as
familiar as those of our own
town, and we are naturally inter
ested to read of happenings
there. The following report
from a well known and respected
resident will be helpful to num
bers of men and women here in
Philipp Schad, baker, Milbank,
S. D., says: "For more than a
year my kidneys distressed me
and every day they seemed to
get worse. The kidney secre
tions were discolored and too
frequent in passage. Several
times at night I had to get up to
pass the kidney secretions. My
back was weak and I was unfit
for work. Fortunately, someone
told me to try Doan's Kidney
Pills and I got a supply. They
helped me right away and after I
had used five boxes the ailments
had left me. I publicly endorsed
Doan's Kidney Pills when they
cured me and I believe they are
the best kidney medicine anyone
For sale by all dealers. Price
50 cents. Foster-Milburn Co.,
Buffalo, New York, sole agents
for the United States.
Remember the name—Doan's
—and take no other. (2-3)
The Standard for news
Patronize the Standard job de
department. Particular printing
for particular people is our spec
ALCOHOL 3 PER CENT
ness and festiontalns natter
Apeifect Remedy for Con*
Hon. Sour Stomdi-Dtinhaa
Worms .Convulsions Awrisfc
ness «dLoss or Sunt
TUB CENTAUR COMPASOP
mon 1 olu
0 S E S
I N S
Exact Copy of Wrapper.
A baby girl was born to Mr.
and Mrs. L. Feeney June 25.
Mr. Hudson of Britton has
been spending the week in Sis
Found-Yale lock key. Owner
can have same by paying for this
Oscar Murray and Mrs. Frank
Hicks have gone to Britton to
Patronize the Standard job 'de
department. Particular printing
for particular people is our spec
Notice to Creditors.
E-itaie of Anna Nordluna, Deceased.
Notice is hereby given by the undersigned
administrator of the estate' of Anna
Nordlnnd, deceased, to the creditors
of and all persons hiving claims against the
said deceased to exhibit them, with the
necessary vouchers, within four months after
the ttrst publication of this notice, to the
undersigned at the office of Thomas Muni,
his attorney, in the court house, la the city of
Sisseton, Roberts count South Dakota.
Dated June 27, A. D. 1913.
ANDREW P. NORDLUND,
Administrator of the Estate of Anna
By Thomas Mani,
Attorney for Administrator, (2-5)
Notice to Creditors
Estate of John Israelgon, Deceased.
Notice Is hereby given by the undersigned
administrator of the estate of John Israelson,
Deceased, to the creditors of and all persons
having claims against the said deceased, to
exhibit them, with the necessary vouchers,
within four months after the first publication
of his notice, to the ^tld administrator at his
office In the Roberts County Court House, in
the City ot Sisseton, in the County of Rob
erts and -State of South Dakota.
Dated June 27,1913.
IVEK J. JOHNSON,
Administrator ot the Estate of John Israel
son. I leoeased.
Attorney (or Administrator. (2-5
NOTICE OF HEARING APPLICATION TO
SELL INTOXICATING LIQUORS AT
Whereas, one W. E. Bollenbeck has filed with
the city auditor of the City of Sisseton, South
Dakota, an application for a permit to engage
in the business of selling intoxicating liquors
at retail in the building situated on lot 11, In
block 58. In the City of Sisseton, Roberts
County, South Dakota, which said application
is accompanied by a petition bearing the
signatures of twenty legal freeholders und
voters or said city, prayi.ig that a permit be
granted the said applicant to sell intoxicating
liquors, at retail in said building located on
lot II, bloc« 58.
Now therefore, notice is hereby given that
said application and petition will be beard by
the City Couueil of the city of sisseton at the
Council Chambers thereof in the City Hall on
Thursday.tbe 10th day of July, 1913. at 8o'clock
in the afternoon ol said day where any person
or persons may appear and show cause why
such permit should not be granted.
Dated this 24th day ot June, 1913.
Frank R. Mcttenna,
Notice To Creditor»,
Estate of John Ahlen, Deceased.
Notice |s hereby given by the undersigned
admtn|s|fator of the estate of John Ahlen,
deceaaeB, to the creditors of ai*d all persons
havurifapUlms against the said deceased, to
exhibit them, with the necessary vouchers,
within four months after the ttrst puticatton
or this notice, to the said administrator at
the office or Howard Babcock in the First
National Bank building, tn the City of Sisse
ton, In the county of Kobens, South Daxota.
Datea Juuu Tili, 1913.
Administrator of the estate of John Ahlen,
Attorney for Administrator. (51-2)
The Kind You Have
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